G l- APRIL 2018

O - Top
Your Go-To
for OMG e
Orgasms a
Badass Advice
from a Pop
Decode His Powerhouse
Insta Likes

Win a
READY,
SET, GO
o
!
apo

Kick-Ass
oa
a o e

Career Upskill for Free

Get a Standout CV

Mentor Ace Your Interview

Score a Paid Internship
Do a Career 180

REAL LIFE
‘ Botoxed
My Vag na
EFF • MARRY • KILL The Beauty Edition Cosmopolitan.co.za
get into it
Cover Stories

17 Your Power
Glam Plan
26 Ready, Set, Go!
48 How to Beat
Unemployment
84 ‘I Got Botox
in My Vagina’
89 Why Girl-On-
Top Should Be
Your Go-To
98 All About Men
101 ‘I Did a Complete
Career 180’
110 10 Questions
You Need to
Ask at Your
36
Can You Hear
Next Interview
112 You Need
a Mentor
Her Now?
Pink is holding
nothing back
Inside

4 From the Editor

9 COSMO Guy
10 Best Month Ever
12 Confessions
13 COSMO Shop
14 The Quickie
Cover Info 15 #RealTalk
17 Beauty
Our cover star Pink
Photography Jason Kim Fashion
25 Style
direction James Worthington DeMolet 36 Features

TO P FLEUR DU MAL JAC K E T M I S B H V E A R R I N G S M E S S I K A PA R I S

Hair Anh Co Tran/Traceymattingly.com
Makeup Francesca Tolot/Cloutier Remix
77 Body
Manicure Michelle Saunders Production 89 Love
First Shot Productions 101 Work
Re-create her look with MAC cosmetics
Her face Studio Fix Fluid SPF 15 (R460) 119 Life
NW20 with Extra Dimension Blush (R380) 125 Stockists
Hushed Tone Her eyes Eye Shadow (R220)
Carbon and Eye Kohl (R270) Smolder with 126 Horoscopes
Bold & Bad Lash Mascara (R320) Bold, Bad, 128 COSMO Quiz
Black Her lips Matte Lipstick (R240) Pink
Plaid Her top Va Bien Her jacket and
pants Mugler Her earrings David Yurman Win!
76 A GetSmarter
online course
118 Sissy Boy watches
 EDITOR’S LETTER

‘Of course I’m not worried

about intimidating men.
The type of man who will be
intimidated by me is exactly
the type of man I have no
interest in.’ -Chimamanda
id you know Ngozi Adichie
that workers
with mentors
earn up to ‘I’m tough, I’m ambitious
double more annually and I know exactly what
than those without? I want. If that makes me
Not only that: employees
a bitch, okay.’ -Madonna
with mentors are five times
more likely to be promoted. ‘There’s something so
These staggering facts are special about a woman
who dominates in a man’s
why we’ve decided to help world… It takes a certain
you out by giving you a grace, strength, intelligence,
chance to win one of 10 and fearlessness – and the
kick-ass career mentors nerve to never take no for
an answer.’ -Rihanna
– industry experts at
the top of their game
from companies such as
Unilever, She Leads Africa ‘You can’t move
and the Harvard University mountains by
Center for African Studies. whispering at
See page 112 for more. them.’ -Pink
A mentor is essentially
someone who is more
experienced than you Badass Women
are. They need not work
in the same field as you
on Career
do – but they must hold a more senior role. A mentor is someone who can
‘I love to see a young
advise you critically, challenge your actions, and help you better plan your girl go out and grab
goals, re-prioritise, and understand your strengths and weaknesses. the world by the lapels.
Over the past year, I’ve been seeing a mentor of sorts. We meet once a Life’s a bitch. You’ve got
to go out and kick ass.’
month. Among other things, she sets me practical tasks such as journalling, -Maya Angelou
which has helped me identify behaviours that have in the past been stumbling

P H OTO G R A P H Y VA L E N T I N A N I C O L , G E T T Y I M AG E S
blocks to a better and more present me. The process has been a personal
game changer: she has centred me greatly, and has pushed me to not freak
out when faced with a challenge, but to live in the now and work through ‘There is no limit to
hurdlesome times with a sense of calm and can-do. what we, as women,
can accomplish.’
I truly believe that mentoring can be the secret weapon you need -Michelle Obama
to get ahead at work – and in life. That’s why we’ve dedicated this issue
to building brand you, with how-to advice on acing being a grown-up in
our #adulting guide, setting goals that actually stick, remarkable stories
‘We need to reshape our own
of women who did a complete career 180, all the questions you need to perception of how we view
ask to impress in an interview, landing the job you love, and what to do ourselves. We have to step
when you just don’t know what to do. Get inspired and let us be your up as women and take the
cheerleader – because the future is female! lead.’ -Beyoncé

‘I am a woman with
thoughts and questions
and shit to say. I say
if I’m beautiful. I say if
I’m strong. You will not
determine my story –
Holly Meadows I will.’ -Amy Schumer
Editor
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

4
 What’s th
e
thing you’v craziest
e
to get a jo done
T HE b?
COSMO
T
EDITOR ANSWER EA M
Holly Meadows holly@assocmedia.co.za S:

EDITORIAL/ONLINE
‘I once blufed in an
DEPUTY EDITOR Sarah Browning-de Villiers
sarah@assocmedia.co.za
interview that I had
Photoshop skills… MANAGING EDITOR Margot van Zyl
Then I spent the ART DIRECTOR Juan Geel
whole night doing juan@assocmedia.co.za ‘I cold-called the
a basic crash course ART EDITOR Shirley Padi HR department to ask
online. Fake it until about jobs – there was
CHIEF COPY EDITOR Ania Rokita Taylor a vacancy that hadn’t
you make it, right?
It got me the job!’ ‘I walked up to the ACTING ONLINE EDITOR Zoya Pon been advertised. If
fashion director of one CONTENT PRODUCERS Lisa Katz, Busang Senne I hadn’t called, I’d never
of my fave glossies and have known. Then
SOCIAL MEDIA MANAGER Ashleigh Engel
introduced myself. I wrapped my CV around
(I was hostessing at the FASHION DIRECTOR Bev Nates bev@assocmedia.co.za a bottle of bubbly and
time.) I then sent her FASHION EDITOR Cleo Marcopoulos delivered it to the HR
my favourite cocktail FASHION ASSISTANT Clare Robertson manager. I wanted to
with a “business card” make sure she’d read it,
I had printed,
BEAUTY DIRECTOR Juana Parathyras juana@assocmedia.co.za
rather than it getting
specifying that I’m her JUNIOR BEAUTY EDITOR Aphiwe Khambule lost among all the other
new intern and I make BEAUTY WRITER Helen Wallace CVs she got. I got an
excellent cofee. I got interview the next week.’
the internship that
kick-started my career COMMERCIAL
COSMO KEY ACCOUNT MANAGERS Alyson Brown alyson@assocmedia.co.za,
LOVES… – and later, the job.’
Carmen Clegg carmen@assocmedia.co.za,
…the new Samsung
Petronella Mphahlele petronella@assocmedia.co.za
Galaxy A8 (from R8 999).
How sexy is the curved SPECIAL PROJECTS KEY ACCOUNT MANAGER Niki Cassapis niki@assocmedia.co.za
glass back? It’s LEAD ADVERTISING CONTROLLER Shantel Peskin
packed with cool COSMOPOLITAN WEBSITE Cosmopolitan.co.za
tech, and the
rose-gold version
is beyond.

ASSOCIATED MEDIA PUBLISHING

HEARST MAGAZINES INTERNATIONAL Senior vice president/ CHAIRMAN Jane Raphaely CREATIVE STUDIO COPYWRITER
Managing director Asia Pacific and Russia Simon Horne CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER Celeste Jacobs
Director of international licensing and business development Julia Raphaely CREATIVE STUDIO ART DIRECTORS
Richard Bean Senior vice president/Editorial and brand director
HEAD OF ADVERTISING AND Victoria Meder, Janine Nel
Kim St Clair Bodden Deputy brands director Chloe O’Brien Fashion/
Entertainment director Kristen Ingersoll International editions CREATIVE SOLUTIONS Leigh Kinross CREATIVE STUDIO SENIOR DESIGNER
editor Jacquelyn Galgey Editor-in-chief, COSMOPOLITAN (1965- GROUP BRAND DIRECTOR Jessica Cohen
1997) Helen Gurley Brown Emilie Gambade CREATIVE STUDIO DESIGNERS
HEAD OF DIGITAL AND MARKETING Stacey Knipe, Nadine Williams
Editors of international editions Argentina. Australia: Keshnee Elrike Lochner GROUP VIDEOGRAPHER/PHOTO EDITOR
Kemp. Brazil: Cristina Naumovs. Bulgaria. Chile. China: Yvonne Liu. HEAD OF TALENT Kim van der Linden Valentina Nicol
Croatia: Aleksandra Orlić. Czech Republic: Sabrina Karasová. Finland: DIGITAL TRAFFIC MANAGER Nasheeta Khan CREATIVE STUDIO PROOFREADER
Stina Mantyniemi. France: Marie la Fonta. Germany: Anja Delastik.
Hong Kong: Ruqiyah Law Kam Ying. Hungary: Johanna Sabján. India:
DIGITAL COMMUNICATIONS MANAGER Kelly-May Macdonald
Nandini Bhalla. Indonesia: Filisya Thunggawan. Italy: Francesca Delogu. Blue Masoka PRODUCTION MANAGER
Kazakhstan. Korea: Hyun Joo Kim. Latin America: Lucía Sotelo Santos. DIGITAL MEDIA AND DATA STRATEGIST Paul Livingstone
Latvia. Lithuania: Violeta Kalikauskiene. Malaysia. Middle East: Kavita Marilize Nel ASSISTANT PRODUCTION MANAGER
Srinivasan. Mongolia. Netherlands: Anne Marije de Vries Lentsch. DIGITAL ASSISTANT Simone Smit Shaakira Ajam
Philippines: Marla Miniano. Poland: Hanna Wolska. Romania: Diana HEAD OF CREATIVE STUDIO Kat de Sarigny REPRO MANAGER André Reinders
Colcer. Russia: Aliona Peneva. Serbia: Nasja Veljkovic. Slovenia: Manca CREATIVE STUDIO TRAFFIC MANAGER Rugayah DTP RETOUCHER Michelle Saunders
Čampa Pavlin. Spain: Cecilia Múzquiz Herrero. Sri Lanka: Kinita Shenoy. du Toit HUMAN RESOURCES OFFICER
Turkey: Ozlem Kotan. UK: Farrah Storr. Ukraine: Oleksandra Burynska.
US: Michele Promaulayko.
CREATIVE STUDIO PRODUCER/ Natasha Marillier
ART BUYER Cindy Comer FINANCIAL MANAGER Bianca de Jongh
Head ofice: Ninth Floor, 80 Strand Street, Cape Town 8001. SPECIAL PROJECTS MANAGER SENIOR ACCOUNTANT Marcellé Finnucane
PO Box 5355, Cape Town 8001; 021 464 6200 (editorial/promotions), Nicole Newman ACCOUNTANTS Angelene Facolyn,
e-mail cosmopolitan@assocmedia.co.za. BRAND ACTIVATION COORDINATOR Lee-Ancher Strauss
Subscriptions:  087 405 2221, +27 21 045 1809 (international); Mushfieqah Kannemeyer DEBTORS CONTROLLER Meagan Dowman
subs@magsathome.co.za. MARKETING COORDINATOR CHAIRMAN AND CHIEF EXECUTIVE OFFICER’S
IF YOU CANNOT FIND COSMOPOLITAN AT YOUR
Claudell van Eeden PA Janine Duncan
LOCAL STORE, E-MAIL POTEGO@ASSOCMEDIA.CO.ZA.
MARKETING ASSISTANT Potego Mminele CLERICAL ASSISTANT/DRIVER
The proprietor and publisher of COSMOPOLITAN is Associated WEB ADMINISTRATOR Rhonda Absolon Trevor Goodall
Hearst, Ninth Floor, 80 Strand Street, Cape Town 8001 CREATIVE STUDIO HEAD OF COPY RECEPTIONIST Carol Geduld
Reproduction: Associated Media Repro Jaime Waddington OFFICE ASSISTANT Felicia Burt

HEAD OFFICE (CAPE TOWN) Associated Media Publishing, Ninth Floor, 80 Strand Street, Cape Town 8001. JOHANNESBURG OFFICE The Business Exchange,
Second Floor North Wing, 90 Rivonia Road, Sandton 2057; 010 286 1175. SUBSCRIPTIONS AND BACK COPIES 087 405 2221; foreign subscribers:
+27 21 045 1809; subs@magsathome.co.za; Cosmopolitan.co.za/subscriptions (tablet). COMPANY WEBSITE www.assocmedia.co.za

Printed by

A division of Novus Holdings

S I M P LY F L AW L E S S
D AY T O N I G H T
S TAY FA S T F O U N DAT I O N
& P R E S S E D P OW D E R

2 4 h r We a r. F l a w l e s s M a t t e F i n i s h .
SPF 20. Shades for Everyone.

Maximum look, minimal effort.

M&CSAATCHI ABEL/21909/E

Model is wearing Stayfast Foundation in Caramel

 The Camera. Reimagined.
Introducing the new Samsung Galaxy S9. Now with radical 960FPS
Super Slow-mo so you can capture the moment within the moment.
Innovative features include a stunning super low light camera that’s brilliant
in the dark and an AR Avatar with the emoji that’s actually you.
 Sorry,
Not Sorry
‘I took away a bit of an
unapologetic nature from
Michael B Jordan playing a villain. You can
The 31-year-old forget that it’s totally fine
to be selfish sometimes –
star, who played playing this part was a
supervillain Erik nice reminder.
Killmonger in Black
Panther, talks about
relationship stamina
and when it pays off
to be a little selfish

Growing Up
‘My 20s were about fun –
and a lot of trial and error! I’m
still figuring it all out, but I have
a better idea of what I want in
a relationship. Guys take a little
longer to get there – but when
you hit your 30s, you start to
have more of a bird’s-eye
view on things.’

The
Long Haul
‘My parents have been married
for more than 30 years. They’ve
taught me that relationships take
work – on both sides. There are
P H OTO G R A P H Y P E G G Y S I R OTA / T R U N K A R C H I V E C O M P I L E D BY R AC H E L M O S E LY

many options out there, so people

can be quick to abandon what they
have. But I’ve seen my parents stick
through the hard times. I admire
Feeling that, so I’m definitely going
Pumped Up to apply it to my future
‘It took a lot of work situations.’
to get to the size I needed
to be to play Erik Killmonger.
When you’re in that kind of shape, A New Man
you definitely walk a little taller, ‘I can be super-indecisive,
sit a little more upright to the point where I’ll just stay
and feel a little more at home. But I’m working on living
confident.’ more, instead of being in my shell.
Pretty soon, you’ll see me blossom
into a more open version of MBJ.
I’m going into a more carefree
wave in the next year
or two.’ ■
 April

3
Find Your Zen

h
The Full Moon
Peace Beach
Meditation on Camps
Bay beach is here.
Expect guided
meditation, yoga,
sound journeys
and more – good
SCAN VIA
vibes guaranteed!

1
Rock Out
The Parlotones, one of SA’s most Moozlie
successful indie-rock bands, will
be performing at Rockwood Theatre
in Pretoria on 25 April, and Durban on
7 and 8 June. Rockwoodtheatre.co.za

SCAN VIA SCAN VIA

4
Be Lekker
The annual Afrikaans KKNK
arts festival is back from 29
March to 4 April in Oudtshoorn. From
drama to music – with contemporary
local musos like Mi Casa, Matthew Mole
and Majozi – the showcase promises
to thrill art lovers. Kknk.co.za

2
Get Your Wings
With acts including
Mi Casa
DJ Tira, Distruction
Boyz, Moozlie and Zara Julius,
the Red Bull Music Festival will SCAN VIA

be the place to be in Jozi from 3

to 8 April. Hosted across several
venues in Braamfontein, Soweto
and Newtown, this music
fest ofers a range of genres,
including rap, jazz and kwaito.
Redbullmusicfestivaljhb.com

Distruction
Boyz
SCAN VIA

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

10
 5 The Book

8
Of Joan Tomb
Lidia Yuknavitch Raider
If you love Margaret
The action-
Atwood, this one’s
for you: a dystopian packed franchise
novel that retells has been revamped,
the iconic story with Alicia Vikander
of Joan of Arc. taking the lead
Empowering and
(replacing Angelina
mesmerising, and
already topping Jolie). A huge portion 9 Gringo
SCAN VIA must-read lists. of the filming was This dark comedy with
on location in Cape Thandie Newton and
Town – look out for David Oyelowo tracks
6 Heads Of The businessman Harold as
familiar landscapes. he navigates local drug
Colored People
Nafissa lords, his back-stabbing
Thompson-Spires business colleagues and
This collection a black-ops mercenary.
of moving and
darkly funny
stories explores
the concept of
black identity
in a so-called
SCAN VIA post-racial era.

7 Feel Free
Zadie Smith
In this compilation
of essays, one of
the most beloved 10 A Wrinkle In Time
contemporary An epic cast of Oprah
authors artfully Winfrey, Mindy Kaling
questions and Reese Witherspoon
everything from brings to life this fantasy
social media to story of two children who
global warming. travel to a dangerous
Thought-provoking mystical planet in
SCAN VIA and heartfelt. search of their father.

12 Golden
PHOTOGRAPHY GETTY IMAGES COMPILED BY SARAH BROWNING-DE VILLIERS

Kylie Minogue
Ms Minogue is back
with an impressive
14th studio album.
While it’s filled with
the kind of synth-
pop dance songs
you’d expect from
her, there’s a distinct country vibe thanks to
the singer’s recent time spent in Nashville.

13 Izikhali
ZamaNtungwa
Zandie Khumalo

11
Sex & Cigarettes Zandie is stepping
out of the shadow
Grammy-winning Toni Braxton
of her sister Kelly
is releasing her first solo album in with this debut
a whopping eight years – and we can’t wait! album. A must for
‘It’s about girl empowerment,’ she says. ‘I think lovers of Afro-soul
my fans are really going to like it.’ – expect rich, traditional rhythms, uplifting
tunes and celebratory beats. ■

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

11
You reveal your most embarrassing, ridiculous, what-was-I-thinking moments

‘I was having sex with ‘I had just started

my BF in my room. We
heard my little brother
outside so I hid in my
wardrobe. He came in,
and asked my BF where
I was. My BF said I’d gone
to the shop. I had my
phone, so I texted my
bro to ask if he needed
anything. He wanted a
slushie; when I “got back”,
I told him the machine
was broken…’ -DANI, 24
seeing this guy
when he told me
that he gets grossed
out very easily, and
how he really hates
it when people spit
while talking. I was
laughing so hard
that I spat … right
into his mouth. He
was disgusted; we
never spoke again.’
-DANIELLE, 24

‘I was telling my friend

about a guy I was seeing
– it wasn’t anything serious
yet. My friend took my
phone to check out the
guy’s Instagram … then
looked at me and smiled.
I realised he’d liked all of
this guy’s photos from,
like, a year ago. Thanks
for making me look like
a stalker!’ -RAYANE, 19

‘I was working
at a radio station
‘On my first-ever date, I was
and, one day, so nervous that I sweated off
I slipped my
casual-sex
my nipple covers. Then I got
buddy into my period (while wearing a tight
PHOTOGRAPHY ANDREW FINL AYSON/BAUER

the ofice for

a quickie. Little white skirt). I was also suffering
did I know the through blisters the entire time
room had audio
surveillance… because the date involved a lot
A few days
later, I was told
of walking around. Two hours in, ‘I was texting with a guy for a few weeks.
that my “services I gave up and told him everything. It was becoming more steamy and serious …
were no longer
required”.’
After all that, I got a second date then he accidentally created a group of all the
girls he was texting. It was me and 16 others!’
-RICKI, 25 – and now he’s my BF.’ -SHEREE, 20 -LUCIE, 27

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

12
 Everything you need to make your work week rock
W
HO HOPok and l.

2
S o o
TOn Faceb symdbe’.
pe he Co
1 O k on t t ‘QR ode SCAN VIA
c
c l ic Selec n t h e !
2 Sca g o
and

1
3

7
Organise your
Plug in and paperwork the
Zen out – ideal sparkly way.
if colleagues are R99,99, TYPO

3
driving you crazy!
R200, POLAROID
at Homemark

SCAN VIA
P R I C E S C O R R E C T A T T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S P R I C E S A R E R E C O M M E N D E D R E T A I L P R I C E S * T H E C L A R I N S O F F E R M AY N O T B E U S E D I N C O N J U N C T I O N
W I T H A N Y O T H E R S P E C I A L O F F E R S O R D I S C O U N T S . A L L O T H E R T S & C S A T C L A R I N S . C O . Z A A P P LY, I N C L U D I N G D E L I V E R Y C O N D I T I O N S . E & O E

4
Charge your
phone and make a
magical statement.
R299, LARRY’S
at Superbalist

SCAN VIA
SCAN VIA
Kick away Monday
blues with fancy
Souk sneakers. Send out positive vibes
R1 499, SUPERGA in the office kitchen.
X PICHULIK SCAN VIA R199 for two, H&M

6 5 SCAN VIA

Forget old-school Post-its

Buy any Clarins foundation
– these Roller Notes Sticky
at Clarins.co.za and get a 10%
Notes are lit!
discount PLUS a free cosmetic
R130, YUPPIE GADGETS
bag – perfect for storing your
makeup stash at work. Use
the code CLARINSXCOSMO
SCAN VIA when shopping. Offer valid
until 30 April, while stocks last.*
CLARINS Everlasting
Foundation+ SPF 15 (R485)
the quickie
With Star Wars: The Last Jedi headliner
and Lancôme spokesmodel Lupita Nyong’o

My happy place: My apartment in Brooklyn. It has

a really warm energy. I love sitting in my rocking
chair to watch the sun go down. Fave Insta
account: @kaymontano. She’s a makeup artist
who posts incredible images of people of note
from days gone by. I have a real weakness for:
Potatoes. French fries, potato chips, mashed
potatoes… I just really like potatoes. My best
trait: I approach things in a childlike way,
and I try not to take myself too seriously.
One thing I have to do every day: Make my
bed in the morning. If I don’t, I’ll make it right
before I get into it. It’s actually a good thing
… until you pull people out of bed to do it.
Pet peeve: When people dance around a
subject rather than getting to the point.

P H OTO G R A P H Y PA M E L A H A N S O N / T R U N K A R C H I V E CO M P I L E D BY R AC H E L M O S E LY
My current #WCW is: Sarah Paulson.
I love her honesty and boisterousness.
She’s just dope. It’s tough for me to resist
someone who: Has a beard. Something
that makes me feel extra sexy: Mascara.
My go-to is Lancôme’s Grandiôse – it has a
funky-shaped brush that makes application
easier. Everyone in their 20s should: Do
sit-ups! It’ll tighten you up for a much
looser future. My mantra: Do one
thing every day that scares you. ■

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

14
 #REALTALK
Ys
Danielle Bowler
Writer
Twitter: @DanielleBowler
Instagram: @dannibowler
When I was a child, I sat on the floor, every year, my face
lit by the reflection of the TV screen. It was my favourite
time of year: watching Miss South Africa.
As years went by, I continued to view the annual beauty
pageant, my excitement coexisting with an unfamiliar
feeling in my body. I had started to compare myself to the
women on the screen, noting the absences and requirements:
hair cascading in waves, bellies flat, bodies appearing
‘perfect’. I became aware of how I didn’t measure up.
Mainstream pageants are built on exclusion. When
we think about them, we often ignore the cisgendered and
sexed nature of the discussion. They include competitions
like Mr South Africa – which can
represent damaging, exclusive ideals
of masculinity – and queer pageants
that have arisen out of a need for
community and inclusion but that
wrestle with their own exclusions and
Is
transmissions of ‘ideal’ ways to be.
Mainstream pageants say to
women and femmes that the ideal
is to be thin, tall, light-skinned,
Pageantry
able-bodied and virginal. Pageants
did not invent these beauty ideals;
they are reflected to us through
runways, movies and attitudes. But
pageants capitalise on the structural
BS?
architecture of the world we live in to a heightened extreme.
There have been shifts in mainstream pageants. These
include more black and brown women wearing their natural
hair on stage. Still, not enough has been changed within
the structure of the competition and the barriers to entry.
Mainstream pageants are profit-making and thus expensive
to participate in, making class another site of exclusion.
As Gugulethu Mhlungu argues, critiquing these spaces
must not be about ‘vilifying the women who participate
in them’. Rather, our critique must be aimed at structures
that uphold this kind of pageantry and contribute to the
narrow ideals of being.
P H OTO G R A P H Y TA R R Y N H ATC H E T T
Systemic change is required if we are to move towards
a boundary-less perception of beauty and worth. I still
watch mainstream pageants, screaming as Demi-Leigh
Nel-Peters is crowned Miss Universe. I revel in the drama
and extravaganza of them. But there’s a greater awareness
that’s replaced the unfamiliar feeling I used to have as a
child. I know now that beauty is much more vast than its
on-screen reflection, stretching far beyond singular ideals
and gesturing towards infinite possibilities of being.
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
15
No
Margaret Gardiner
Journalist; first South African
to win Miss Universe (1978)
Twitter: @MargaretGGG
Instagram: @margaret_gardiner
In any competition, people take a natural aptitude, hone
and perfect it, then work hard to achieve recognition for
it. It’s a widely accepted way of navigating life. But when
it comes to physicality, this concept is denigrated.
In every area of life, we open ourselves up to judgment.
But it seems that if it’s in the form of a pageant, we presume
it’s exploitative. No doubt there are some pageants that are
exploitative – but there are boardroom conversations and
sales negotiations that are, too.
Competing in a pageant seems to come with the caveat
that you’re stupid. Why do we still say ‘She’s beautiful and
smart’, like one cancels out the other? That’s a destructive
assumption – and it’s wrong.
For many, calling pageants BS
stems from an unconscious bias
society teaches us to have against
beautiful women (or women in
general). It’s the same bias that tells
us you can’t be beautiful and clever,
or that women can’t wear a bikini
and be taken seriously in business.
It’s a big part of why women are
still paid less than men and hold
fewer positions of power, and why
men and women of equal ability and
proven success do not get promoted
at an equal rate. Now that’s BS.
Men and women have been branded with different traits
and capabilities. Yet many of the things girls are supposed
to suck at – engineering, science, maths – have been proved
to be untrue. You know what else is untrue? That you can’t
compete in a pageant and also be smart, ambitious and a
feminist. You have to ask yourself the question: if someone
offered you US$100 000, first-class travel around the world,
an opportunity to create a platform for anything you believe
in and a chance to meet with global industry leaders, would
you take it? The price? Walking across a stage in a swimsuit.
Smiling (a lot). Talking passionately about causes you believe
in. A lot of hard work and training to get there – just like an
athlete or someone trying to pass a course they’re studying.
It’s hard to deny it’s an amazing opportunity, and say it’s
any less worthwhile than training for a sports event.
Competing in a pageant can help you start a business or
pursue a passion. It gives you a platform, connections and
celebrity to harness for your future. Many Miss Universe and
Miss South Africa winners have gone on to build impressive
businesses, champion worthy causes and make a difference
in the world – even if they did start out in a bikini… ■
BY K AT E F O ST E R
 Have a fling with Prepare to catch Leave this 2017
this fab trend LTR feelings craze behind

Jelly Formulas Gel Sheets DIY Recipes

Bouncy textures are big. Upgrade your paper mask Delete that Pinterest
Face Masks

Try one with circulation- to one made from this thicker,
revving turmeric for seaweed-derived material. It’s
brighter skin ASAP. extra-hydrating and stays put
J ONE Jelly Pack on your face.
Luminous Mask (R70
at www.kbeauty.co.za) KISS Hydro Gel
Mask with Rosehip
Essential Oil (R120)
Nourishing
board of kitchen-inspired
skincare. Ingredients such
as lemon and baking soda
can cause serious irritation
when not formulated
by professionals.

Chrome Gloss Drying Liquids

Loved holographic Lip Stains Ditch the moisture-sucking
Nail the sexy matte
Lip Colour

nails? Swipe on this lip lip kits. Your newly soft

look sans cracking
equivalent – then fire kisser will thank you!
or flaking – a make-
up your Kirakira+ app out-session must.
for an extra effect.
URBAN LANCÔME
DECAY Vice Matte Shaker

P H O T O G R A P H Y A L L I E H O L L O W A Y, I M A X T R E E P R I C E S C O R R E C T A T T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S P R I C E S A R E R E C O M M E N D E D R E T A I L P R I C E S
Liquid Lipstick (R315) Yummy Pink
(R290) Studded

E-Strobing Pearly Primer OT T Contours

Highlight in an E-shape from You’ll never risk disco-ball Say bye to overcomplicated
cheekbones to temples vibes with a blurring sculpting methods. You
Makeup

to above brows. base that offers won’t miss the labour-

a subtle glow. intensive
technique
MAC
Mineralize BENEFIT The – or the
Skinfinish Porefessional Pearl cake face.
(R460) Gold Primer (R475)
Deposit

Shimmer Spray Hair Masks Unicorn

Spritz glitz on Yes, for hair! Apply to damp Hair
your ends, along hair and cover in a towel It had
the parting and wrap to let the a good,
Hair

anywhere else you hydration fun run,

want to sparkle. soak in. but now
it’s time for
SCHWARZKOPF LEE STAFFORD
Blond Me Shine
it to fly away.
Coco Loco Coconut
Elixir (R310) Mask (R160)

’90s Nail Art Healthy Gels Super-Long Acrylics

Neon hues Polymers in this base Remember when you could
Manis

and cute flowers coat ensure quick type and swipe without your
are back removal. Bonus: nails getting in the way? ■
– and this they also keep nails’
time around, protective oils intact.
they’re chic.
SORBET Back
To Basics Protect
Base Coat (R67,95)
 You Wanted
to Know…
Q Should I use a facial
cleansing brush?
A It’s great for sloughing away
dead skin cells and clearing
up congestion. Use it twice
a week to get a radiant glow.

Q Is the three-step
cleansing routine outdated?
A Not at all: the three-step
routine was developed to
ensure we take care of
our skin’s basic needs.

Q How often
should I exfoliate?
A Exfoliate three times
a week – max. Over-
exfoliating can strip
skin of its natural oils
and lead to dehydration.
TRY AFRICAN EXTRACTS
Rooibos Exfoliating
Face Scrub (R56,99)

We Tried…
NEUTROGENA
You asked, we answered. You’re welcome! HYDRO BOOST
CLEANSER
BY A P H I W E K H A M B U L E (R99,95)
What it is
P H O T O G R A P H Y K A T B O R C H A R T / T H E L I C E N S I N G P R O J E C T. C O M , A N D R E W E P E N E R / P I X E L L O U N G E

A super-gentle water-
Facial
P R I C E S C O R R E C T AT T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S P R I C E S A R E R E C O M M E N D E D R E TA I L P R I C E S

gel cleanser. Why I like

MICELLAR FOAMS it It makes my face feel
Cleansers Also known as They deeply refreshed. Use it if
Decoded cleansing waters, clean skin to You have dehydrated
these efective CLEANSING nix excess oil or super-dry skin.
-Aphiwe
GELS CREAMS multitaskers WIPES and impurities.
Khambule,
With their jelly- These have remove makeup If you’re lazy They can be a bit junior beauty
like texture, gel a thick, soft and tone skin. AF (no judgies), harsh – they’re editor
cleansers work consistency Best part? No cleansing wipes made to dry skin
to eliminate and usually need to rinse are the easiest out slightly. CETAPHIL DERMA
acne-causing use natural oils afterwards. way of washing BEST FOR CONTROL OIL
bacteria and to clean, soothe BEST FOR away makeup, Oily and acne- CONTROL FOAM
unclog pores. and hydrate. Sensitive skin dirt and sweat. prone skin WASH (R160)
BEST FOR BEST FOR Dry, TRY AVÈNE BEST FOR TRY GLAMGLOW What it is A great
foam cleanser. Why
Combination sensitive skin Cleanance Oily and Supercleanse
I like it When I sufered from
skin TRY DR Micellar combination Clearing Cream- severe acne, this was my go-
TRY EUCERIN HAUSCHKA Water (R220) skin To-Foam to for clear skin that didn’t
Dermo Cleansing TRY NIVEA Cleanser feel tight. Use it if You
Purifyer Cream (R377 Perfect (R490) have oily skin/break-
Oil Control for 50ml) & Radiant outs. -Helen
Wallace,
Cleansing Micellar 3 In
beauty
Gel (R150) 1 Cleansing writer
Wipes (R62,99)

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

19
 BEAUTY

You’ll need A creamy,

full-coverage concealer.
Pro hack Swipe it under each eye in
the shape of an upside-down triangle,
then wait a minute. ‘Trying to blend it
right away is like attempting to spread
fridge-cold butter on toast,’ says Benefit
makeup master José Rivera.
Concealers that will make BOBBI BROWN Instant Full Cover
any skin situation disappear Concealer (R510)

BY E R I N STOVA L L

You’ll need A green colour corrector

P H O T O G R A P H Y G U I L L E F A I N G O L D / S T O C K S Y, A N D R E W E P E N E R / P I X E L L O U N G E P R I C E S C O R R E C T A T T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S P R I C E S A R E R E C O M M E N D E D R E T A I L P R I C E S
(to neutralise redness) and a hydrating
concealer on top.
Pro hack Never let the applicator touch
a zit – that can spread bacteria. Use
a concealer brush, blend with a clean
finger, then wash the brush, says Rivera.
INGLOT HD Corrective Primer (R499) Green
GUERLAIN Multi-Perfecting Concealer (R595)

You’ll need A concealer with SPF.

UV rays tend to make pigmentation
issues worse.
Pro hack Apply, then buf with a damp
sponge to nix patchiness, says Rivera.
PHYSICIANS FORMULA Argan Wear
BB Concealer SPF 30 (R230)
BEAUTY BLENDER (R405)

You’ll need A concentrated matte

stick that has a dry, chalky feel.
Pro hack Apply mattifying primer
beforehand (it helps fill divots), then
set everything with translucent powder.
WET N WILD Megaglo Makeup Stick (R79,95)

You’ll need A whipped concealer

that spreads easily over large areas
(such as rosacea-flushed cheeks).
Pro hack For a seamless finish, Rivera
suggests blending in a ‘press and roll’
motion with your middle finger.
BENEFIT Boi-ing Airbrush Concealer
(R475) No 3 ■

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

20
 BEAUTY

HAIR GOODNESS
FRESH FACE
Use this creamy, NEW CLASSIC
This ultra-lightweight
deliciously scented The freshness
and easily buildable
hair smoothie as a of citrus and
foundation blends
deep conditioner or the intensity
effortlessly on skin
a mask for stronger, of sophisticated
for a smooth and
bouncier hair. patchouli create
natural finish.
CAROL’S a new, seductive
ELLIS FAAS Skin Veil
DAUGHTER version of this
Foundation (R1080)
Black Vanilla cult classic.
Medium Dark
Moisture & Shine CHANEL Coco
Hair Smoothie (R300) Mademoiselle
EDP Intense
(R2 465
for 100ml)

For
R150
BORN TO GLOW or Less
Use the individual
shimmery colours of this NYX Liquid
palette as eye shadows, Suede Metallic
or blend them and Matte (R150)

Love
sweep on cheeks. Biker Babe
SORBET Shimmer
& Glow Shimmer
Bronzer (R200)
P R I C E S C O R R E C T AT T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S P R I C E S A R E R E C O M M E N D E D R E TA I L P R I C E
PHOTOGRAPHY ANDRE WEPENER /PIXEL LOUNGE TEXT APHIWE KHAMBULE

For
R150
or Less
WET N WILD
MegaGlo Highlighting
Powder (R89,95)
SHINE ON OILED UP Precious Petals
This bright-pink, Perfect to use on body
gel-like nail polish and hair, this oil has a
provides long-lasting dry finish and leaves skin
colour and shine. feeling satiny-smooth.
OPI Infinite Shine 2 L’OCCITANE Body
Gel-Lacquer (R280) Fabulous Oil (R475)
Two-Timing The Zones

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

21
 Vitamin C is notoriously hard to
stabilise. When you layer certain
forms of it (like ascorbyl glucoside)
with AHAs (like glycolic and lactic
acid) or BHAs (like salicylic acid),
‘The pH can get altered, making
it ineffective,’ says dermatologist
Marnie Nussbaum. If you want
to use both (and you should –
they’re amazing brighteners
and anti-agers), use vitamin C REN Glycolactic Radiance
Renewal Mask (R625)
in the morning to protect skin
CLINIQUE Fresh Pressed
from pollution and UV damage, Daily Booster With Pure
and a peel while you snooze. Vitamin C 10% (R895)

Each is effective at banishing

break-outs: benzoyl peroxide
kills acne-causing bacteria,
while retinol increases skin-cell
turnover to prevent clogged pores.
Certain products don’t play well But mixing them may cause both
together. These are the combos to break down, says dermatologist
Annie Chiu. Stick to BP during BENZAC AC 5 Gel 5%
that add up to skin disaster the day and retinol at night (it’s Benzoyl Peroxide (R245)
SKINCEUTICALS Retinol
degraded by sunlight) to target 0.3 High Potency Refining
BY I N G E B O R G VA N LOT R I N G E N
acne from all angles. Night Treatment (R1 250)

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

22

When it comes to these chemical
exfoliators, less is more. ‘Together
they can over-strip skin, leading
to dehydration, decreased barrier
function and inflammation,’ says
Chiu. Doubling up can also cause
oil glands to produce more oil to
compensate. If you’re pimple-prone,
stick to just salicylic acid – it’s great
for de-gunking pores and getting rid
of oil. If you’re worried about texture
or age spots, opt for glycolic acid to
boost cell turnover.
P H O T O G R A P H Y B A R R Y M A K A R I O U A D D I T I O N A L T E X T E R I N S TO VA L L P R I C E S C O R R E C T AT T I M E
O F G O I N G TO P R E S S P R I C E S A R E R E C O M M E N D E D R E TA I L P R I C E S
Both are physical exfoliators,
which means they manually
remove dead skin cells – and
they’re too harsh to use
together. ‘Doing so can lead
to redness, inflammation,
even break-outs,’ says Chiu.
Use your brush daily with a
creamy cleanser, and scrub
(with your fingers) a couple
of times a week only.
BEAUTY
Chemical sunscreens (their
active ingredients commonl
end in -zone or -ate) provide
protection by absorbing UV
rays. ‘They’re formulated to
penetrate skin,’ says Chiu.
DERMALOGICA Adding a fragrance on top
Clearing Skin Wash (R580) can interfere with the level AUSTRALIAN GOLD
X-Treme Sport Broad
DERMACEUTIC of protection you’re getting, so Spectrum SPF 50 (R300)
Foamer 5 Gentle
Exfoliating Foam (R660
skip your chest and neck, and STELLA McCARTNEY Stella
at www.dermaceutic.co.za) spray hair or clothing instead. Peony (R1 015 for 50ml EDT)
Silicones (the mattifying
agents found in many
primers) repel moisture
SORBET
Rechargeable – so spritzing a face
Facial Cleanser mist on top of one is
Exfoliating
Brush (R329) pointless, because the
ELIZABETH ingredients won’t reach
ARDEN your skin. You can still
Ceramide
Purifying Cream
use a mist – just spray L’ORÉAL Infallible
Mattifying Base (R230)
Cleanser (R385) it on bare skin, allow
GLAMGLOW
to dry completely, Glowsetter Makeup
then apply primer. ■ Setting Spray (R400)
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
23
 DALMATIAN_794_E_C

Raise a glass to every exceptional

moment in your life
Great moments are made more memorable by exceptional wine. Boschendal Chardonnay Pinot Noir is crafted
with great care using the two classic grape varieties of traditional Méthode Cap Classique. Making it an incredibly
sophisticated crisp, pale blush wine with outstanding finesse and elegance. Perfectly crowning every occasion.

Enjoy Responsibly. Not for Sale to Persons Under the Age of 18.
P H O T O G R A P H Y N I Q U I TA B E N T O C O M P I L E D A N D S T Y L E D B Y C L E O M A R C O P O U LO S A N D C L A R E R O B E R T S O N
P R I C E S C O R R E C T AT T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S S T O C K I S T S O N PA G E 1 2 5

FROM TOP

at Bacher & Co
1 R1 695, GUESS

American Swiss
3 R1 799, DKNY at
at SUPERBALIST
2 R3 499, Kate Spade

definitely worth watching!

finishes. These timekeepers are
colour, subtle textures and classic
Time it like a boss with flashes of
 Yo
t h ur
ba at p wea
tra r h ut po
ns opp in n t
lat e do o
e r, b ub a w
to u le i
af ild tim nni
te a
r-h w e. ng w
ou eek Fro ar
rs da m dr
fu y w bo ob
n e
wi ard ss b ? It
th ro ab em
th be e s
es th to
e
pi at c
ec an
es
 STYLE

R249,
R2 699,
COTTON ON
TOPSHOP
R899,
WOOLWORTHS

R899,
CALVIN
KLEIN

R799,
ALDO

T
R3 690,
PRADA
With its streamlined silhouette at Luxottica
and versatile tendencies, the
blazer has the ability to make
R949,
CHARLES
even the most causal of items
& KEITH look polished

R529,
H&M

R180,
THE FIX

t h e blazert
Worka night oug
R799, on replacin th R2 550,
CASTELO
FOREVER
NEW by shirt wi
your ports bra.
as
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

27
 STYLE

R1 695,
A-LIST
R179, H&M

R199,
ALDO

R3 499, KATE
SPADE at Fossil

R3 190,
MIU MIU
at Luxottica

R999,
ALDO

The longer-length skirt makes

for a great Boomerang op –
R629, and it’ll help you transform
THE LOT
from desk to drinks in less
than five minutes

R899,
H&M

R249,
H&M

R799,
FOREVER
Ap NEW

will aodstman hat

d
elemeantrendy R2 295,
A-LIST
t.

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

29
 P H OTO G R A P H Y PAUL SUESSE/BAUER , C O L L E E N C O P P E N H A L L / D I S FA S H I O N DENIS TODOROVIC A D D I T I O N A L FA S H I O N CLEO MARCOPOULOS AND CL ARE ROBERTSON
M O D E L S O P H I E G R AY/ C H A D W I C K M O D E L S H A I R A N D M A K E U P G E O R G I A H U L L / R E LO A D A G E N C Y P R I C E S C O R R E C T AT T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S S TO C K I S T S O N PA G E 1 2 5

R759, ZARA

COTTON ON
R129,
BOUTIQUES
R999, NICCI

R459,
ZARA
Ex
H&M
R629,

31
STYLE

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
collar will amp things up
The reworked shirt blurs

sleeves and an interesting

and fashion attire. Dramatic
the lines between officewear

R629,
H&M
Have

boots.
footwear ies and
accessofrun with
crim so–n like the se

R495,
A-LIST
R1 599,
WITCHERY

R3 499, KATE
R170, MRP

R179, H&M

SPADE at Fossil
 R549,

Pssst!
FOREVER 21
s
a rm
ve lty ch -style
no et
Add xtra stre on a
e l ip
for eal – c y ring
a p p k e
R499, CALL pom c ar f
IT SPRING p o m ie a sil k s l e .
or t he han d
to t

R560,
COLETTE
BY COLETTE
HAYMAN

Back in
the Pack
A N D C L A R E R O B E R T S O N P R I C E S C O R R E C T AT T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S S TO C K I S T S O N PA G E 1 2 5
PHOTOGRAPHY GETT Y IMAGES, COLLEEN COPPENHALL /DIS COMPILED BY CLEO MARCOPOULOS
The backpack is winning us
over with its street cred and
practicality – and it’s a chic
hands-free solution to a handbag

R529,
TOPSHOP

R599, CALL
IT SPRING R499,
FOREVER 21
 ADVERTORIAL

#BoschendalCelebrates its #MCCNewLook – with the same delicious taste. Side note: the new
Demi Sec is so yum! Whether you consider yourself a class act, the life of the party or a flirty
dream, there’s a Boschendal MCC to suit your personality. Turn the page to find out more…
 Tasting notes
More about you

Your perfect MCC

from the start. Must be nice!

The flirtatious Boschendal Brut Rosé.

and infectious laugh captivate everyone right
Flirty Flame

Seductive crushed strawberries and cream with

fresh raspberry and cherry flavours are beguiling.
Falling for you is easy. Your charming personality
ADVERTORIAL

Tasting notes
More about you

Your perfect MCC

The timeless Boschendal Brut NV.

It’s an explosion of bubbles with lemon cream and

Classy S ayer
a classic way. This makes you stand out in a crowd.
You’re a sophisticated show stopper, born to slay in

biscotti flavours, and orange-peel and citrus freshness.

P H O T O G R A P H Y K AT I N K A B E S T E R / H E R O C R E AT I V E M A N A G E M E N T S T Y L I N G K A R L I E N L A B U S C H A G N E / B I R D O N A W I R E P H O T O G R A P H E R ’ S A S S I S TA N T T H E O D O R E A F R I K A
S T Y L I S T ’ S A S S I S T A N T S I N D I E P I E N A A R M O D E L S C H A R L E E N F / T W E N T Y M O D E L M A N A G E M E N T, S T A C Y M / T W E N T Y M O D E L M A N A G E M E N T, S A M I R A / F U L L C I R C L E M O D E L S ,
TAY H O P K I N S / F U S I O N M O D E L S H A I R K E L LY PA I TA K I / G LO S S A R T I S T M A N A G E M E N T ( U S I N G K E V I N M U R P H Y ) M A K E U P R E N E E D E W I T/ G LO S S A R T I S T M A N A G E M E N T
 All-Out
Kween
More about you
Being glam and owning the room
comes naturally to you. You’re the
perfect balance between spicy and
sweet – just like Boschendal’s new
Demi Sec.

Your perfect MCC

The new Boschendal Demi Sec.

Tasting notes
Delicate bubbles bring forth crème
brûlée and almond biscotti decadence,
balanced with citrus notes for a vibrant
finish. #MCCNewBubbly ■

Visit Boschendalwines.com or connect with Boschendal on social media: Boschendal BoschendalWines boschendalstyle
C Singing while you’re
A N

hanging upside down is tough.

Consistently topping the music
charts for nearly 20 years? Even
tougher. But PINK makes both
look easy. With the release
of her seventh studio album,
Beautiful Trauma — a chart-
topper – and a new world tour
that kicked off in March,
the pop powerhouse is
holding nothing back

H E R
Y
O U Photography
JASON KIM
Fashion direction
JA MES WORTHINGTON
DEMOLET

H E A R
N
O W ?
 COVER STAR

Full name: My most-used emoji:

Nickname(s): I overuse this word or rase:

One thing people get wrong about me:

My cocktail of choice:

A fictional character
I identify with:

Becaus

One person I was

surprised to find
out is a fan of mine:
 T H I S PA G E : D R E S S A K R I S E A R R I N G S FA L LO N S H O E S S O U L I E R S O P P O S I T E : T O P F L E U R D U M A L J A C K E T 3 .1 P H I L L I P L I M
S K I R T M I L LY E A R R I N G S M A R I A TA S H P R E V I O U S S P R E A D : D R E S S Z A C B Y Z A C P O S E N J A C K E T I A M G I A E A R R I N G S D AV I D Y U R M A N

I feel strongest when:

me feel totally badass:
Something that makes

My favourite body part:

moment of the past year:

My favourite pop-culture

From
Saturday
Night Live

39
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
Because:

Something I think
A famous woman I admire:

usic needs:
Some album names I considered
before decidin on Beautiful Trauma:

Life-changing lyrics:

A pivotal moment in my 20s:

Carey and I have this in common:

How I’d describe these duet partners in one word:

CHRISTINA KENNY
AGUILERA CHESNEY

NATE INDIA ARIE

RUESS The bes y to kee arriage sexy is:

The most ridiculous thing I’ve ever read

or heard about myself:

SIA EMINEM

The number of times I’ve had my heart broken:

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

40
A D D I T I O N A L P H O T O G R A P H Y G E T T Y I M A G E S H A I R A H N C O T R A N / T R A C E Y M AT T I N G LY.C O M M A K E U P F R A N C E S C A T O LO T/ C LO U T I E R R E M I X M A N I C U R E M I C H E L L E S A U N D E R S
P R O D U C T I O N F I R S T S H O T P R O D U C T I O N S T O P C O S A B E L L A J A C K E T 1 0 C R O S B Y B Y D E R E K L A M PA N T S R E J I N A P Y O E A R R I N G S M E S S I K A PA R I S

I changed:

more attention to:

My hope for all of womankind:

Something I’d love people to pay
And one thing I’m still working on:
One thing about myself that I’m proud
 AT Z
BY L I SA K
 WORK

Create
Get Your Finances in Order a budget
‘A credit bureau is a company
A credit score helps companies to that receives, stores and reports
• Note the total amount
ascertain how risky it is to lend you information on how you manage
of money you receive
money, based on how you’ve handled your credit, including store accounts, each month under
credit in the past. A good score is loans and credit cards.’ ‘income’. Scan the QR
important if you’re planning to Financial providers check code below to download
borrow money in the future. your credit record before they a free budget template
‘The easiest way to build a credit decide whether or not to lend using Excel. You can
record is to get a store card,’ says you money. If your record is poor, also try apps such as
Nedbank’s Quintin Swanepoel. Use you can be refused a loan. To keep Wally or 22seven.
the card regularly to build up a credit your record in check, only borrow
record (every few months) but pay off what you can repay and set up
the amount almost immediately (and debit orders to ensure payments
in full) to avoid accruing interest. are made timeously.
A bad credit rating occurs Having trouble making repayments? SCAN VIA
when you default on a payment. Contact your creditors before you
‘Creditors supply information default – most will renegotiate. • Below income, list
[about how you manage your debt ‘You’re entitled to a free copy your expenses. Divide
or account with them] to a credit of your credit report from each these into categories:
bureau, and that’s all added to of the registered credit bureaus rent, groceries,
your profile,’ says Jeannine Naudé once a year,’ says Naudé Viljoen. cellphone and so
on. List everything.
Viljoen, former executive manager Try Creditexpert.co.za or
Allocate a figure to
of the Credit Bureau Association. Mytransunion.co.za.
each based on what
you usually spend.

o o do a e
• Add up your expenses
– if they exceed your
Someone who
considered a
predominan
tly lives and wor
g income, you’ll need to
‘tax resident’ ks in South A reduce your spending.
tax. You don and should b frica is
’t need to su e registered
only one em b mit tax return for income
ployer that d s if you earn
have other so oes not exce a salary from
urces of inco ed R350 000
and don’t w me (such as  per year, don
ish to claim an interest or re ’t • Make sure you
y deduction ntal income)
Yo u need a s. track your spending.
tax numbe Over-reaching your
If you don’t ha
ve a tax num r budget? Time to
(find yours at ber, head to
Sars.gov.za) your nearest cut back.
to register. with your ID SARS branch
and proof of
address
The eFilin
g
Register for process
eFiling at Sa
submit an in rsefiling.co.za
come tax retu . ‘A taxpayer
tax consulta rn once a year will need to
nt at LPH Ch ,’ says Nici M
runs from 1 M artered Accou artin, senior • Replace your
arch to 28 Fe ntants Inc. ‘T
filing season b ruary of the he tax year projected expenses
opens in July following ye
Log on, follo an d closes in Nov ar. T he tax with what you’ve
w the steps, ember for ta
an IRP5 form upload your xpayers.’ actually spent. If you’ve
from your em supporting d
ployer), and ocs (such as stuck to your budget,
submit.
well done! If not, you’re
putting yourself in debt.
Time to readjust for
next month.

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

43
 WORK

3
Hospital plan or medical aid
A hospital plan typically only covers your medical
costs if you’re admitted to hospital in an emergency.
Full medical-aid plans will contribute towards other
medical expenses depending on the level of cover
you opt for. To figure out what will suit you best,
ask yourself these questions:
Save for • How often do you visit the doctor, and how much
do you spend on medication per month? If your
Your Future answers are seldom and not much, a hospital plan
makes more sense.
• Do you have a chronic illness, such as diabetes?
A full medical aid covers a list of chronic medications,
but you need to complete the necessary forms to
‘Only six percent of South Africans receive these benefits.
can retire comfortably,’ says Mark • What can you aford? There’s no point signing
van Eyssen, an independent financial up for full-cover medical aid if you can’t manage the
adviser at Dux Solutions. ‘Everyone monthly payments. It’s ideal to have at least a hospital
should be planning for retirement.’ plan so that you’re covered in an emergency. Hospital
A retirement annuity (RA) is tax- plans difer depending on your provider but can start
efficient: what you pay in is tax-free at R800 per month for one person, while full-cover
up to a certain amount, and you won’t plans can cost from R1 500 upwards for one person.
be taxed on the money your investment
makes. An RA also removes the

P H OTO G R A P H Y I STO C K P H OTO.C O M

The main purpose of life insurance is to help your
temptation to break into your nest dependents financially should you pass away. This is
egg: ‘Current legislation restricts only necessary if you have debt that would be passed
access to the fund until you’re 55,’ on to family members (for example, a bond) or have
says Van Eyssen. dependents who will need a source of income in your
How much should absence. The cost of life insurance will depend on your
age, health and the amount you want to have paid out.
you be saving?
If you’re earning R20 000 per month,
for example, and want to retire at
65 with enough income to last until P o se s
you’re 85, you’ll need to put away
the below amount*:
What ’s in
come prote
ce
What’s your
most valuab ction?
If you start when you’re 20: R3 080 –
it’s you. Inco le asse t? No, it’s no
me protectio t your house
per month (15,4% of your salary) ability to earn n is a type of or your car
, so that if yo insurance th
would contin u were to bec at protects yo
If you start when you’re 25: R3 900 ue to receive ome ill and un ur
Most registe a salary. able to work,
per month (19,5% of your salary) red financial you
and disability service provi
If you start when you’re 30: R5 050 protection in ders ofer af
percent of yo surance. Exp ordable inco
ur salary. If yo ect it to cost me
per month (25,25% of your salary) pay about R u earn R15 0 about one to
150 to R200 00 per mon five
requirements per month fo th, you’ll likel
and your serv r cover, subje y
*Based on income escalation of six ct to your spec
percent per year, with a 10% annual adviser discl ice provider. ific
oses to you ac ‘Make sure th
growth on portfolios and contributi (FSP) number creditations at your finan
showing that an d a financial se cial
escalating by 10% per year. advice,’ says they’re qualif rvice provid
financial advi ied and regis er
ser Antonio tered to ofer
Salvatore Sien
■
i.

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

44
 BEEN
FOOLED
BYFAKE
CONTENT?
Sources: Ipsos Public Affairs survey, Dec. 2016; Simmons Research, Multi-Media Engagement Study, Spring 2016.

75% of us fall for fake headlines.

We all deserve better. Fact is,
people believe magazine media

MAGAZINE more than any other. Whether in

print, online, on mobile or video,
it provides expertly researched,

MEDIA written and relevant content in

a safe environment.
Content that is worthy of your
Better. Believe It. trust. That’s keeping it real.

#BelieveMagMedia | BelieveMagMedia.com
 First, WTAF?

I
Cryptocurrency – such as bitcoin
– is digital currency that can be
bought and sold online. The tech
that makes it work is blockchain,
complex computer coding and
maths equations (cryptography)
that make up the public log of all

Bit in?
coin transactions. ‘Blockchain is a
distributed database of who owns
what, like a ledger,’ says Warrick
Erlank, portfolio manager at local
crypto asset manager Virtue Digital
Assets. Blockchain is also what
works to keep your buying, selling
Cryptocurrency can and storing of cryptocurrencies
seem, well, cryptic. as secure as possible.
It all started in 2009, when an
But with one in anonymous person/group created
four Millennials bitcoin under the alias Satoshi
investing, it’s Nakamoto. In 2017, bitcoin went
mainstream, with value reaching
never been more US$20 000 (about R240 000)
relevant. We spoke for one coin. Interest in crypto
to the specialists to is mostly thanks to Millennials:
according to a survey by Blockchain
decode it for you Capital, one in four Millennials is
BY ZOYA P O N investing. But how – and why?

Making bank
There are three main ways to
make money out of cryptocurrency:
mining, trading and investing.
Miners have fancy computers
and make money by processing/
authenticating crypto transactions,
Erlank explains. ‘In exchange, they
get paid in the cryptocurrency
they’re working on. They also
help to keep the network secure.’
Because cryptocurrency values
fluctuate, you can also make money
by trading and investing in them.
‘There’s a finite supply of well-
known cryptocurrencies,’ says
Erlank. ‘The higher the demand,
the more the price increases.’
You can trade by buying coins,
then selling them as value spikes
for a profit, capitalising on short-
term price movements. Or you can
invest: buying cryptocurrencies
while they’re low in value and
holding on to them, hoping for a
good increase in value over time.

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

46
 MONEY

How to invest
‘Various exchanges worldwide
sell cryptocurrencies,’ says
Shireen Ramjoo, CEO of
Liquid Crypto-Money, a
crypto and blockchain tech
consulting agency. First, you
need to change rands for the
cryptocurrency you want, the
same way you’d change them
for dollars or euros. Ramjoo
recommends Altcoin Trader
for its variety of currencies.
‘Luno and Ice3X are also
good,’ adds Erlank.
Using one of these trusted
trading platforms, ‘You deposit
rands into your exchange
account; once it reflects, you
buy into the currencies you
want,’ says Ramjoo. ‘You can
also sell your cryptocurrency
back directly to the exchange
– you’ll get cash back in rands
within 24 to 48 hours.’
The trick to making money
is to buy cryptocurrencies
when they’re cheap, then sell
them when they’re worth more
and cash in on the difference.
Values fluctuate by the
second and minute, so if you
want to make bank you need
to monitor the value of your
currencies and be willing to
respond to changes quickly.
PHOTOGRAPHY DAN SAELINGER/TRUNK ARCHIVE, MISS REIN/STOCKSY
There’s also no guarantee –
the value of your currencies
can come crashing down
without any warning.
There’s an app for that
Many of the exchanges, like
Luno, have their own apps to
track the value of coins sold.
There are also apps such as
Blockfolio (free), which enable
you to add a range of coins so
you can track multiple values.
Beware the risks
Cryptocurrency, unlike stocks
and shares, isn’t based on a
tangible RL asset. The value
of cryptocurrency lies in
perception: if enough people
want it and use it, that (and
that alone) gives it value. Igor
Rodionov, managing director
at Advicement Investment
Services, says you should
approach investing in crypto
with caution. Its worth relies
on people’s whims, making it
‘really difficult to value’. He
also says that bitcoin’s large
swings in price and massive
growth have the same
markings as market crashes.
Anything digital is open to
the risk of hacking, so hackers
can steal your cryptocurrency.
Make sure your computer is
protected against malware,
and ensure you store your
money in secure ‘wallets’.
When it comes to storing
currency, Erlank highlights
three main ways to do it: ‘You
can buy cryptocurrency and
leave it on the exchange where
you bought it. This is easiest,
but it leaves you more exposed
to hacks.’ Some large exchanges
(like Luno) are fairly secure,
and may cover your liability
if there’s a hack. You’ll have to
check whether this is the case
with each exchange you use,
and the terms under which
this protection exists. ‘You can
also transfer cryptocurrency
to a digital wallet, or to your
own computer – but then
your computer must be
secure,’ says Erlank
Perhaps the safest wallet
is a hardware wallet, like a
flash drive; but these can be
pricey (from about R1 500),
and you still need to set them
up and secure them properly.
Beware the rise in crypto
scams, where a new currency
is set up (initial coin offerings
or ICOs) and you’re persuaded
to invest early while coins are
cheap – and then the ‘founder’
disappears with your cash.
Your best bet is to stick to well-
known exchanges/currencies.
according to Blockchain
Capital, as they believe they
earn more from their bitcoin
investments and their money
is safer. This decentralisation
separates you from banks: good
if you fear another recession or
don’t trust institutions. Also,
cryptocurrencies hold the
same value around the world.
‘Cryptocurrency may change
the way we make payments
across the world,’ says Bowan.
‘You wouldn’t need to change
currency when travelling,
and you wouldn’t need to pay
expensive transaction fees to
send money across borders.’
And there’s real potential to
make a lot of money. Ramjoo’s
first investment of R3 500 is
worth R37 000 today.
What about tax?
In January, SARS
spokesperson Sandile Memela
said SARS was looking at the
implications of crypto on tax.
‘SARS is still deciding how
to treat cryptocurrency,’ says
Erlank. ‘At the moment, you
should manage it as you would
any asset bought and sold for
profit. It’s best to declare to
SARS when you sell currency
– it’ll likely count as additional
income (for short-term buying
and selling) or qualify for
capital gains tax (for longer-

Because cryptocurrency is term investments). If you’re

Want to Learn More? relatively new, it’s not yet fully
Blockchain Academy courses include protected by law. Nerushka
everything from a bitcoin and blockchain Bowan, a technology law
beginner course to an advanced course. specialist, says that without
regulation, ‘It would be hard
Courses run in Jo’burg and Cape Town, and
to complain to a regulator
online at Blockchainacademy.co.za. if something went wrong.’
GetSmarter ofers a part-time online Oxford
Blockchain Strategy Programme and Oxford There are big pros too
Fintech Programme – see Getsmarter.com. For many investors, a bonus
of cryptocurrency is that it’s
Cryptocurrencies decentralised (not owned or
to Know Now controlled by an authority). It’s
Bitcoin, bitcoin cash, ethereum, ripple, why 65% of Millennials prefer
litecoin, monero, NEO, IOTA crypto to traditional banking,
going to trade or invest, speak
to a tax specialist.’ And keep
all transaction documents –
important for tax returns.
Sound too good
to be true?
As with any kind of trading or
investing, do your research. If
it sounds too good to be true,
it probably is. Only ever invest
money you’re prepared to lose.
The gains can be significant
– but it’s not worth sinking
your life savings into. ■

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

47
 REPORT

HOW TO BEAT
UNEMPLOYMENT

In South Africa, unemployment sits at a horrifying 26,7%.

And of the 66% of Millennials who make up our population, more
than 35% are out of a job. So what gives? Here’s how to beat
the stats and open up your opportunities
BY B U S A N G S E N N E
A D D I T I O N A L T E XT A N D R E S E A RC H BY ROX A N N E F R A N C I S

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

48
A
ccording to Statistics South Africa’s
Quarterly Labour Force Survey, at the
last quarter of 2017 the unemployment YOUTH UNEMPLOYMENT BY NUMBERS
rate was 51,1% for 15- to 24-year-olds,
and 33,4% for the 25-to-34 age group. Statistics South
Ages 15 to 24 Ages 25 to 34
Africa’s Risenga Maluleke indicated that of 10,3-million
15- to 24-year-olds, 3,1-million were not in employment, 51,1% 33,4%
education or training.
‘One of the most concerning implications is that, Okay, but how many people
over time, young people become discouraged in their are engaging in the job market?
search for employment,’ says Sibabalwe Gcilitshana
of NPO Equal Education, a community of researchers Ages 15 to 24 Ages 25 to 34
dedicated to advocating for equality in the education
system. ‘This shifts their status from unemployed
youth to NEETs (not in employment, education or
26,9% 74,7%
are working or are working or
training), resulting in an enormous pool of untapped
actively looking actively looking
potential. The loss of that potential is a tragedy.’ for work for work
For Millennials, job security is a key concern –
and the stats show why. But here’s the good news:
there are ways you can beat youth unemployment.
Knowledge is power, and we’ve got all the info you
need to take matters into your own hands.
HOW IS EDUCATION
WHERE DID ALL THE JOBS GO? AFFECTING UNEMPLOYMENT?
‘Low employment growth has been the consequence
of low economic growth: the labour market cannot
absorb the large numbers of young new entrants,’
says Gcilitshana. Jobs are being created at a much Education
slower pace than the rate at which people are
finishing school or studies. Supply can’t keep up
is key to
with demand. Access to adequate education is also helping you
key – of those unemployed, just 6,6% have tertiary land a job.
education versus 31,2% who have less than matric.

What’s the government doing?

In February’s 2018 State of the Nation Address (SONA),
President Cyril Ramaphosa announced plans to bridge
the gap between young, unemployed people with
little to no experience, and the jobs that will kick-start
their career. Ramaphosa’s focus is on four initiatives: a
‘jobs summit’ to come up with implementable solutions
to combat youth unemployment; an ‘investment
conference’ to attract domestic and foreign money
to inject cash into our economy and help create jobs;
a youth employment service to ‘place unemployed
youth in paid internships across the economy’; and
a youth working group to engage young people and 6,6% of unemployed 27,5% of unemployed 31,2% of unemployed
draw them into conversation with national leadership. people have tertiary people have a matric people have less than
Education is also a focus. At SONA, Ramaphosa said, education a matric certificate
‘Starting this year, free higher education and training
will be available to first-year students from households
with a combined annual income of up to R350 000.’
The budget speech that followed promised R57-billion
for higher education for low-income students.
Maryana Iskander, founder of Harambee Youth
Employment Accelerator, an NPO dedicated to % of unemployed by province
combating youth unemployment by providing crucial Free State Northern Cape KwaZulu-Natal
resources and skills to the youth, adds that for young 32,6% 27,1% 24,1%
women, lack of exposure can be a source of anxiety Eastern Cape Gauteng Limpopo
when it comes to seeking employment. ‘Many young 35,1% 29,1% 19,6%
women who are unemployed don’t know anyone who Mpumalanga North West Western Cape
is working, and can’t ask for advice and support about 28,9% 23,9% 19,5%
how to get a job,’ she says. That’s where COSMO
comes in: we have the practical advice you need.

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

49

RE-CHECK YOUR MARKS
One percent can be the diference between a
pass and a fail. If you have doubts about where
your marks went, have your exams re-checked
or re-marked. Re-checking a paper means a re-
count and re-adding up of marks. Re-marking
is when your paper is completely reassessed.
You can register for a re-check or re-mark at
your school or district ofice. Re-checking papers
costs R23; a re-mark is R98. Want to see your
results? Viewing scripts may only be done
after a re-mark or re-check. The closing
date for applications to view a paper
is seven days after the release of the
re-mark or re-check; it costs R192.
6
GET YOUR MATRIC
AS AN ADULT
If you’re 21 or older and didn’t
get a chance to finish matric, you
can register for a National Senior
Certificate for Adults (NASCA). The
NASCA provides support by teaching
the skills and foundational learning needed
to pursue higher education. To qualify, you’ll
need a Grade 9-level school certificate, a General
Education and Training Certificate for Adults, or
a SAQA-registered NQF Level 2 or 3 qualification
with language and mathematics as fundamentals.
Visit Dhet.gov.za for more.
REPORT
2
REWRITE YOUR EXAMS
If you fell short on an exam or two (max),
you have the opportunity to write it again.
If you were unable to write for medical reasons,
or if you had family issues during exams (such
as a death) and didn’t have the capacity for
writing exams, you also get to rewrite. The
good news? It doesn’t cost a thing. There’s
a very narrow window for this – during
February and March – so apply to rewrite
your supplementary exams at your
school ASAP after finals.
3 REDO MATRIC
If you don’t qualify to write the
supplementary exam – i.e. you failed
(got less than 40% for) more than two of
your exams – redoing matric is an option.
This involves repeating your school year,
which does mean you’ll pay that year in
school fees again. But getting your matric
gives you an important advantage when it
comes to getting employed, so re-enrolling
is almost always worth it. If you can’t go back
to the same school, private colleges such as
Skills Academy (Skillsacademy.co.za) ofer
equivalent matric courses.
I FAILED MATRIC … NOW WHAT?
Your life is definitely not over. Start by
checking your mental wellbeing: if you failed
and are struggling to process this, call the
Department of Social Development’s 24-hour
4 GET A SECOND
CHANCE
‘The Department of Basic
Education’s Second Chance Matric
Programme assists learners who
toll-free counselling line on 0800 428 428, did not pass matric in completing
or dial *120*7867# from any cellphone. school,’ says Gcilitshana. Launched in
Then, take these steps: 2015, the programme is free, ofering
support to learners who need to rewrite a
maximum of two subjects in February/March,
and progressed learners (students who wrote
three or more subjects in November and will
complete the rest in June). It includes face-to-
face tuition in all provinces, at 50 venues in rural
5
and urban areas. The programme is also available
at libraries and community centres, and through
the Mzansi Libraries Online Project (www.nlsa.
ac.za/mlo). Find out more at Education.gov.za.
TAKE A BRIDGING COURSE
This closes the gap between matric and tertiary
education, helping to improve your marks
instead of rewriting matric. These courses can
also earn you enough credits to get a diploma
at a institute of higher learning – a stepping
stone towards getting a degree or securing
a job. While many public schools don’t let you
return and repeat just a few subjects or do a
bridging course, institutions such as Damelin,
Intec, Abbotts, Oxbridge, Taal-Net and
Brainline do. Google them to find out more.
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
50
 8)"5 50 %0 *' YOU’VE GOT MATRIC
BUT NOT A BACHELOR’S PASS
According to Gcilitshana, research
by the Southern Africa Labour
Development and Research Unit
confirms that ‘The value of a matric
certificate relative to that of a Grade
10 and 11 has remained positive both
in terms of earnings and the likelihood
of finding employment.’ The bottom
line? Your matric certificate is very
important, even if you didn’t get
a bachelor’s pass. So well done!
Now make it work for you.
015*0/

&/30-
*/
"
57&5
Technical and Vocational Education and
Training (TVET) colleges or universities
ofer programmes aimed at practical,
sought-after skills employers are looking
for. Traditionally these include training
in agriculture, arts and culture, business,
commerce and management, education,
training and development, engineering,
manufacturing and technology, services,
building construction, and security.
They’re much cheaper than universities
and can provide hands-on training and
experience – fantastic for your CV. Visit
Tvetcolleges.co.za to find out more
about TVETs close to you, the courses
on ofer, entry requirements and costs.
015*0/

456%:
0/-*/&
Nothing says ‘hustle’ like putting
in the hours to study even if you
can’t aford your first-choice TVET
or varsity. Edx.org ofers free online
courses from institutions including
MIT, Harvard, Princeton and Oxford
across a whole host of subjects. No
application is required; courses are
available 24/7.
We also love Google’s free Digital
Skills for Africa (Learndigital.withgoogle.
com/digitalskills): online tutorials teach
you everything from how to build a
website to how to market your brand
online. Once you complete all the
workshops, you’ll get a certificate.
015*0/  '*/% " -&"3/&34)*1
There is a multitude of paid learnerships
out there, always on the lookout for
people who have a matric certificate
but no experience. Plus, they’ll pay
you while they train you on the job.
Visit Serviceseta.org.za, Vunasa.com
and www.careerhelp.org.za to search
for learnerships – or decide which big
corporate you want to work for and
head to their website to see whether
they ofer learnerships. Many do, and
hire annually or bi-annually.
We also love Harambee.co.za,
which links 18- to 34-year-olds with
a valid South African ID to various job
opportunities. There are opportunities
even if you only have Grade 11, although
more options are available if you have
matric. To apply, you must be currently
unemployed, you must not be studying
full time, and you can’t have been
permanently employed in the last
12 months.

WHAT TO DO IF YOU’RE
Ö #F DPODJTF
8 Until then, you have no idea who

READY TO JOB-HUNT is seeing all of your personal info,
You’re not writing a memoir! and over-sharing opens you up
CVs should be no longer than to fraud.

1
GET YOUR CV SORTED
Ö
1VU
/#
JOGP
VQGSPOU
Recruiters don’t have
time to read through
your CV from start to finish.
Most of the time, they scan
pages to catch only the most
relevant information. Keep
your key info – name, most
recent education and latest
experience – upfront and
easy to see. Clear titles and
subheadings will also help.
Having an eye-catching
layout is also key: standard
black-and-white Word docs
just don’t cut it any more.
At Canva.com, you can design
your CV yourself, free of charge,
while Enhancv.com ofers an
easy-to-use, creative template
with a free 14-day trial – enough
to design a CV using the software
and download it before you have
to pay anything.
Career Junction
two pages (though ideally one),
and sized to A4. Always send as
released the 2017 Ö
&YQMBJO
ZPVS
FYQFSJFODF
a PDF, not a Word document. list of the most in- If you’re applying for a job in
demand skills and marketing, make sure what
Ö #F BWBJMBCMF jobs in South Africa. you’ve included in your CV
Put your contact details at Here are the skills reflects that. Don’t have any
the top of the first page: your employers look experience? Focus on the skills
address, cell number and e-mail for the most: you’ve picked up elsewhere, for
should all be visible at a glance. example through volunteering
And if your email address is or a course. Break down the key
sexybitch01@gmail.com, 4PGUXBSF
responsibilities in your most
change it now. EFWFMPQNFOU recent work experience: just
saying ‘animal shelter volunteer’
Ö
,FFQ
ZPVS
QFSTPOBM

'JOBODF
doesn’t cut it. Tell them exactly
JOGP
TBGF NBOBHFNFOU what it means: that you were
Never put your full residential responsible for opening
address or ID number on your and closing on Saturdays
CV, and never attach copies of 4BMFT
(demonstrates responsibility
your ID or education certificates DPOTVMUJOH and trustworthiness), that you
to any applications. This level dealt with clients (shows people
of personal info is only required skills) and that you managed the
once you’re deep into the process .JEEMF shelter’s social media accounts
and the recruiter is running EFQBSUNFOU
(experience in marketing).
a formal background check. NBOBHFNFOU

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

51
Ö
%POÏU
MFBWF
HBQT
Just because you don’t have
tons of work experience doesn’t
mean you should leave blanks
– this leaves the recruiter with
questions and concerns. Explain
gaps: caring for your grandmother
while she was ill; job-hunting
while working as a waitress. They
alleviate doubts in a recruiter’s
mind and demonstrate personal
qualities and attributes. They
also show you’re honest, and
that counts for a lot.
Everyone Started
Somewhere… Seek out opportunities in your
BEFORE THEY HIT community and put yourself
THE BIG TIME, THESE forward – it demonstrates
hustle and work ethic, and
CELEBS HAD SOME
gives you plenty to talk about
MUNDANE JOBS:
in your next interview. ‘It’s also
important to get involved in
a community for networking
purposes, as well as for a sense
of connectedness and to feel
valued,’ says Iskander.
#&
1&34*45&/5
reflects your passion, skills
and experience in this field.
Remove anything that’s vague
– a structured CV reflects
clear career goals, and that
encourages agencies to call
you in for an interview.
Many recruitment agencies
specialise in certain industries,
so only contact those related
to the fields you’re interested
in. Follow up with an e-mail or

4
a phone call a week or so after
(&5
-*/,&%*/

2
‘I would highly
recommend using
LinkedIn as a “social”
platform – it’s like Facebook
but for professionals,’ says Amy
Molony of Recruit Digital. ‘Make
a list of companies you want to
work for and do your research on
them. LinkedIn-stalk their CEO,
Treat job-hunting
like an actual job: set
#&:0/$‚
aside several hours
swept up hair at
each day for the hunt, and set
her mom’s salon. yourself a target of a number
of jobs you’d like to apply for
every day and every week.
Job-hunting should be
time-consuming: you should be
submitting your CV, as agencies
often receive hundreds of CVs
a day. And remember: no legit
agency will charge you for
finding you a job – they will
always charge the company
that hires you. If an agency
asks you for money, it’s a scam.
%0/Ï5
8"*5
'03

manager and receptionist, and
figure out what kind of person
they’re looking for. For example,
if you want to work in fashion,
follow magazines, stylists and
photographers – any industry-
specific individuals you admire.
Comment on and share their
.&("/ '09
once worked at a smoothie
shop, where she wore
crafting individual applications
and cover letters for each
vacancy, and you should be
writing down contact info
for each position so you
can call or e-mail to follow
up on your application.
-00, */ 5)&
7
"/
0110356/*5:
Ì
4&*;&
*5
‘I nearly gave up
after 10 months of job-hunting,’
says Gail*, 28, a young woman
whose struggle mirrors that
of millions of South Africans.

posts, and use this momentum
to back up your passion for the
industry and grow your network.
The same strategy can apply to
Twitter and even your personal
Facebook account.’ Keep it out
of the creepy zone by ensuring
that comments and shares are
professional and related to the
content – as in, don’t comment
with ‘Please give me a job’.
5
a life-sized-banana
costume. True story. 3*()5 1-"$&
Bizommunity.com
is great for media,
retail and marketing job listings.
Indeed.co.za and Pnet.co.za are
among the most reliable general
vacancy sites. Jobspace.co.za
is very user-friendly – and you
can also search for nationwide
job listings at Cosmopolitan.co.za!
$&-&45& /56-*
$0/4*%&3
‘After completing a diploma in
human resources management,
I was excited to get started with
my career. But 10 months later,
I still hadn’t found a job. I’d been
for many interviews but never
landed the gig.
‘My self-esteem took a
knock. It seemed as though
all my fellow graduates had
been employed. But I didn’t
lose hope. While I was job-

6
worked as a bookshop hunting, my cousin would
70-6/5&&3 3&$36*5.&/5

3 assistant before becoming visit and tell me about how

‘We always advocate
for gaining as much
experience as possible
through volunteering or getting
involved in your community,
which will make you more
employable,’ says Iskander.
If you know you want to work
in education, volunteer to be a
teaching assistant at your local
school part-time. Not only will
it expose you to the reality of
the job, you’ll also be gaining
valuable work experience to
add to your CV. Use the rest
of your time to find a paid
part-time gig and to job-hunt.
a crowd-pulling comedian.
8)001* (0-%#&3(
is a licensed beautician,
and spent time working
as a beautician at a morgue.
Yeah, we didn’t know that
was a thing, either…
"(&/$*&4
Recruitment agencies
act as a mediator between you
and the company you want to
work for. Recruiters send your
CV to companies and arrange
interviews. Once you’re placed
in a job, recruiting agencies
get a fee from the company
for recruiting an employee.
Before you meet anyone
from an agency, they generally
ask you to send your CV. This is
your first step to selling yourself.
Have a clear idea as to what kind
of job you want. If you want to
go into sales, make sure your CV
well her boyfriend was doing at
his company. One day, I googled
the company and realised it was
a company I wanted to work for.
I called to ask about vacancies,
but they didn’t have any.’
Gail wasn’t going to take no
for an answer. ‘I’m persistent
by nature, so I kept applying
– calling and e-mailing them
weekly to tell them how I could
add value to their company and
why I wanted to work for them.
Eventually, they asked me to
come in for an interview.’
* NAME HAS BEEN CHANGED

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

52
 REPORT

Natasha Marillier
Human resources
practitioner at
Associated Media
Publishing
‘First impressions last. The
interview starts from your
initial communication with an
employer: your job application.
Appropriate tone, attention to
grammar and the efort you
put into following application
instructions all speak volumes.
‘Cyberstalk us! Get to know the
company, our latest news and
initiatives. FYI: we’ve looked
at your profiles…
‘There’s nothing more
important than fitting in
with the company culture.
Many hirers are adopting
U N F PA S O U T H A F R I C A , S TAT I S T I C S S O U T H A F R I C A P R I C E S C O R R E C T AT T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S
The Top 10
Companies
to Work for
According to
Top Employers
Institute, which
analyses companies
based on nine areas
(talent strategy,
performance
management,
career and
succession
management,
compensation and
Amy Molony Tiara Pathon benefits, culture,
workforce planning,
Recruit Digital Founder of Dress for on-boarding, learning
Success; HR practitioner and development
‘Be authentic. Companies are hiring
people with the most applicable
who’s worked for Hewlett and leadership
Packard and Medscheme development)
experience and qualifications,
and the best personality fit. ‘You’re interviewing the company
‘Empower yourself with knowledge. too. Ask questions about 1 Old Mutual
Spend time on the company’s website, company culture, development 2 Ernst & Young
read the fine print, check their social opportunities, company policies (EY Africa)
media. Impress with your knowledge and whatever will be important 3 SAP
of them and how much you want to to you. You are your own personal 4 Tata
work for them – not just anyone. brand – people will buy into your Consultancy
‘Adjust your CV and cover letter. “why”, not your “what”. Tell your Services
I don’t mean revamp it entirely for story and be proud of it. 5 Microsoft
each position – but tweak your CV ‘Be innovative with your CV. Get 6 Nestlé
to reference specific skills relevant a basic Piktochart account (free, South Africa
to the company you’re applying at. Piktochart.com) to turn your CV 7 Accenture
You should also write a very specific into creative infographics and 8 Orange
covering e-mail or letter (addressed more. Add a pro pic (not a selfie), Business
to the hiring manager by name) or create an online CV via a free Services
as to why you would like to be website such as Wix.com. Don’t (South Africa)

the “hire character, train skill” interviewed for the position. forget a spellcheck, for everything 9 Vodacom Group
approach. Also, gratitude is ‘Be honest. This may sound obvious, from e-mails to your cover letter. 10 Dimension Data
P H OTO G R A P H Y G E T T Y I M AG E S S O U RC E S Q UA RT E R LY L A BO U R F O R C E S U R V E Y ( Q 4 20 1 7 ) ,

the best attitude. No matter
how badly you think an
interview has gone, an
e-mail of thanks can
only help your application.
but don’t lie. Don’t alter past positions
or get friends to be your references.
References should be people not
related to you who have worked
with you in a professional capacity.’
‘Come to your interview prepared.
Dress for the job you want. Be
early. Bring a printed copy of your
CV. The more prepared you are,
the more relaxed you’ll feel.’

WHAT TO DO IF YOU’VE company, showing of my personality DRESS FOR THE JOB

LANDED AN INTERVIEW
STAND OUT
Gail didn’t stop hustling once the company
invited her in – she knew she needed to stand
out at the actual interview, too. ‘I wore a T-shirt
that said “Hire me!” across the front, with a blazer,
formal jeans and heels,’ she says. ‘I knew time
was precious, so I took along a timer, placed it
on the interviewer’s desk and asked whether
I may have three minutes to explain why I was
the perfect candidate. In those three minutes,
I clearly linked my skills set to the needs of the
throughout. They ofered me the job!
This was after more than a year of being
unemployed. The lesson? Keep trying,
don’t lose hope, fight for the chance to
prove yourself, and keep changing what
you’re doing if it’s not working.’
There are plenty of other ways to stand
out at an interview. Research your interviewer
and reference their career, favourite authors
or perhaps a quote from a speech they gave
– anything to make you look like you’ve done
more than the previous person they interviewed,
and make them remember you.
‘If I am interviewing someone for a creative
position and they’re sitting in front of me in
a suit, I’m thinking they don’t really know us,’
says Andy Limpus, director of talent acquisition
at consultancy firm Penske Media Corporation.
‘If you’re interviewing for a creative job, you’re
going to have to be a little more creative in
your own style. But if you’re interviewing
for an accounting position, I do expect
you in a suit.’
And remember: ‘Every opportunity
provides a chance to make an impression
and expand your network,’ says Molony. ■

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

53
M A K E
SO M E R1 699,
ZARA

NOI

THIS AUTUMN,
THE DRESS R1 299,
CODE IS ALDO

NEXT-LEVEL
FIERCE. FROM
POWERFUL
SILHOUETTES
TO OTT GLITZ, R329,
H&M
YOU’LL BE
THE BOLDEST
OF THEM ALL
PHOTOGRAPHY BEN WATTS
FASHION AYA KANAI

METALLICS
& PRINTS R279,
Mix metal tones ZARA

with animal prints

for a match made
in maximalist
heaven.

R299, CHARLES
& KEITH
 R899,
ADIDAS

R449, LA
SENZA

R899,
H&M

R1 299,
ALDO

FEMME-
LEISURE
Wear sheer floral
fabrics with sporty
details for an
unexpected twist.

R999, DUNE
LONDON

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

55
 R599,
THE LOT

R149, ALDO

R360,
THE FIX

R1 700,
LULU
BELLE

R249,
ALDO

BLUSHING
BABE
Ditch the black:
rosy tones will
make you look
and feel fab. R1 399,
WITCHERY
 FASHION

R399,
FOREVER 21

R1199,
CALVIN
KLEIN

R1 239,
TOPSHOP

R249,
COTTON
ON

R399,
WOOLWORTHS

POST-MODERN PINSTRIPES
Once an ofice-limited print, pinstripes are ready
to shine. A peekaboo lacy bra will look sexy AF. R1 699,
STEVE
MADDEN

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

57
 FASHION

R249,
ALDO

R799,
FOREVER
NEW

R695,
A-LIST

R1199,
FOREVER
NEW

POWER
RED
Feel extra-
powerful in a
bold belted jacket.
R1 999, NICCI
BOUTIQUES

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

58
R1 599, STEVE
MADDEN

SATIN
FINISH
An element of
sheen elevates
any look – and
satin’s fluidity
makes for relaxed
all-night glam.

R300, AFRO
GRUNGE

R649,
WITCHERY
 FASHION

R400,
THE FIX

R549,
TOPSHOP

R2 650,
CASTELO

BUTTONED-UP
BADASS
Sexy and sleek, a blazer
will definitely steal the
limelight. If it’s extra-
length, wear it as a dress
to ooze attitude – or try
matching separates for
R5 490,
a structured silhouette.
FOLLI FOLLIE

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

60
 A D D I T I O N A L P H OTO G R A P H Y C O L L E E N C O P P E N H A L L / D I S A D D I T I O N A L FA S H I O N CLEO MARCOPOULOS AND CL ARE ROBERTSON
M O D E L S D A N I E L A B R A G A / N E X T, E B O N E E D A V I S / T H E L I O N S H A I R N I C O L A S E L D I N / A R T D E P A R T M E N T M A K E U P E R I C P O L I T O / A R T D E P A R T M E N T
M A N I C U R E M I C H I N A KO I D E /A R T D E PA R T M E N T L O C AT I O N VA N D A L N E W YO R K P R I C E S C O R R E C T AT T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S S TO C K I S T S O N PA G E 1 2 5

SUIT YOURSELF

61
Wear yours to work – and afterwards
– with a commanding attitude to match.

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
R1239,
R599,
R1 690,
EUROPA

TOPSHOP
R379, H&M

ART SHOES

WOOLWORTHS

STUDIO
R749, H&M
R1 099, ZARA
LULU BELLE
R975,
Warrior
PHOTOGRAPHY MICHAEL NAUMOFF
FASHION EMMA READ

R79,99,
THE FIX

R699,
LA SENZA

R749, IVY PARK

at Topshop

R1 699,
G -STAR
RAW

R1 299, STEVE
MADDEN
 R999, STEVE
MADDEN

R2 099,
CALVIN
KLEIN

R3 299,
G -STAR
RAW

R399,
WOOLWORTHS

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

63
 R1 699,
ADIDAS

R229,
H&M

R499,
COTTON ON

R799,
CHARLES
& KEITH
R399, LA SENZA
FASHION

R1 099, H&M

R649,
TOPSHOP

R499,
WITCHERY
 R179, H&M

R979,
TOPSHOP

R1 599, STEVE
MADDEN

R849, FOREVER 21
R629, H&M
FASHION

R129, H&M

R1 299,
G -STAR
RAW

R899, CALVIN KLEIN

R869,
TOPSHOP

R829,
CHARLES
& KEITH
FASHION

R999,
TOPSHOP

R249,
COTTON ON

R749,
ADIDAS

R1 999,
LE COQ
SPORTIF
 A D D I T I O N A L P H OTO G R A P H Y C O L L E E N C O P P E N H A L L / D I S A D D I T I O N A L FA S H I O N CLEO MARCOPOULOS AND CL ARE ROBERTSON
P H O T O G R A P H E R ’ S A S S I S TA N T N I C K S H AW FA S H I O N A S S I S TA N T A N A Z U PA N O S K A M O D E L S O P H I A / T H E M G M T H A I R A N D M A K E U P J O E L
P H I L L I P S / V I V I E N ’ S C R E AT I V E D I G I TA L O P E R AT O R M AT T E O M A E R I P R I C E S C O R R E C T AT T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S S TO C K I S T S O N PA G E 1 2 5

69
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
ON
R229,

R499,
COTTON
R150,
THE FIX

WOOLWORTHS
R569,

at Topshop
IVY PARK
 to

IF YO U TH IN K N E UTR AL MAKE U P I S BO RIN G ,

YO U ’ RE IN FO R A N U D E AWAKE N IN G . TH E S E LO O KS
M AY B E M U T E D , B U T T H E Y ’ R E A N Y T H I N G B U T B A S I C .
HERE’S HOW TO STRIP DOWN
B Y E R I N S T O VA L L P H O T O G R A P H Y Y U T S A I
Go
 Monochrome
Why search for options when you can make one shade do all the work? A pretty
peach hue such as MAC Lip Pencil (R240) Fruit Cocktail looks gorgeous all over.
Swipe it on lids, lips and cheeks, then blend it out with your fingers.
G O FO R TH E

A little sheen makes an everyday tone way more edgy. Try Rimmel Oh My Gloss! Lip Gloss
(R89,95) My Eternity on your pout, pat a matching shadow on lids, then dab on some
shine (3INA The Eye Gloss (R160) 500 is amaze). Waterproof mascara such as Revlon
Super Length Waterproof Mascara (R110) Blackest Black prevents smudges.
 GET

Shade-shifting metallic shadow draws all the attention. Try Catrice Liquid Metal Long-
Lasting Cream Eyeshadow (R79,95) Champagne Shower – the soft-tipped applicator
packs on pigment and makes this sexy look a cinch. Just swipe it on lids, and use a finger
to diffuse the shimmer up towards the browbone.
M O D E L S I R E L A N D B A L D W I N / D T M O D E L M A N A G E M E N T, I S A B E L L A P E S C H A R D T/ P H O T O G E N I C S , M A M E A D E J I / L I P P S L A , J U L I A N A H E R Z / E L I T E H A I R A N D R E G U N N / H O N E Y A R T I S T S
M A K E U P C H R I S T I A N M c C U L LO C H / S T R EE T ER S M A N I C U R E C H R I S T I N A AV I L E S /O P U S B E AU T Y P R I C E S C O R R E C T AT T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S P R I C E S A R E R E C O M M EN D ED R E TA I L P R I C E S

ngles
Highlighting Powder (R740) Bronze Glow on cheekbones. Good to glow! ■
towards the temples, then dust a shimmery highlighter such as Bobbi Brown
Over the dramatic Insta contour? This low-key alternative is subtle but still makes
cheeks look crazy-chiselled. Sweep a peachy blush from the apples of your cheeks
 COMPETITION

One of four online courses

worth R14000 each, courtesy
of COSMO and GetSmarter

I
mprove your life and receive a best-in-class
education experience from one of the top-tier
universities that collaborate with GetSmarter.
GetSmarter offers courses that deliver verifiable,
relevant skills and competencies with personalised,
people-mediated support. This is your chance to turn
your life and career up a notch, make a career change HOW TO ENTER
or learn something completely new. Go to the GetSmarter
post in the ‘Win’ tab at
Cosmopolitan.co.za,
and enter the keyword
GETSMARTER.

PHOTOGRAPHY GETTY IMAGES

Visit Getsmarter.com or connect with GetSmarter on social media:

GetSmarter getsmarter getsmarter_online

CosmopolitanSA cosmopolitansa CosmopolitanSA CosmopolitanSA

TERMS AND CONDITIONS: Course choices are limited to South African university online short courses only.
For competition rules, see page 125 or visit Cosmopolitan.co.za/terms-conditions. Entries close on 30 April 2018.
Let’s Talk
About the
V-Word*
* Vegan,That Is
 INTERESTED?
These sites
will give you
a helping hand:

Vegansa.com
Includes listings for
vegan-approved
shops, recipes and
grocery products.

Elated.co.za
A great vegan blog
that lists online
sites to shop for
vegan products, as
well as recipes and
nutrition advice.

Happycow.net/
africa/south_
africa
A directory of
vegan-friendly
restaurants in
South Africa.

No longer the I grew up eating meat and

three veg, and I loved it. But
hippie-dippy after seeing a particularly
as I don’t become one of ‘those
vegans’. I should thank them
What actually
is veganism?
for taking the heat off me … According to the People

butt of jokes, hideous video of a cow in

an abattoir (that’s the most
veganism is detail I will share with you),
I’ve sworn off meat and
trending. Is become a vegetarian. Cool?
but what’s all the hate about?
Those of you who aren’t
yet on the vegan train could
be on your way, with Google
revealing a 90% increase
for the Ethical Treatment
of Animals (PETA), a vegan
does not consume any product
that’s derived from an animal.
That means cutting out meat

it time to get Every time I meet someone

new and they find out that
on board the I’m a dreaded ‘veggie’, the
conversation usually goes
green train? along the lines of, ‘I don’t
want to be offensive, but
BY M O R GA N R E A R D O N
[insert offensive comment
here].’ However, lately the
script has changed. I’m no
longer the most annoying
person in the room. Enter
the vegan: people have started
saying they can handle me
being a vegetarian as long
in ‘vegan’ searches over the
past year. ‘Veganism is rising
in popularity because it offers
benefits for personal health,
environmental health, ethical
food choices and great-tasting
food,’ says nutritionist Lulu
Cook, owner of Gut Feeling
Holistic Health and Fitness
Solutions. ‘After years of it
being perceived as “extreme”,
the word is out that it’s easy to
enjoy a delicious, nutritionally
balanced vegan diet.’
(obviously) – but it also means
cutting out dairy products,
eggs and even honey. Many
also refuse to eat (or use)
products made with animal
ingredients such as gelatine,
which can be found in (for
example) lollipops.
But a vegan diet can have
huge health benefits. ‘A ll
of our macronutrient needs
can be met by a vegan diet,’
says Cook, ‘and the research
is consistent that plant-based

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

78

diets offer long-term health
benefits such as a reduced
risk of Type 2 diabetes,
cardiovascular disease
and certain types of cancer.’
PHOTOGRAPHY SEBASTIAN MADER / TRUNK ARCHIVE, JUAN MOYANO/STOCKSY
Quit the hate
Contrary to popular belief,
vegans don’t walk around
with flowers in their hair;
nor do they smell of hemp.
In fact, in the past decade,
veganism has transformed
from a niche diet to a lifestyle
that’s backed by everyone
from Miley Cyrus to Chloë
Grace Moretz. My own
sister, Brooke, has been
a vegetarian since she
was 21, and over the
past 18 months she’s
converted to veganism.
HEALTH
I CAN’T
BELIEVE
IT’S
VEGAN…
Tasty snacks
from PETA’s
‘Accidentally
Vegan’ list
OREOS
Twist, lick and dunk
(in almond milk).
DORITOS
SWEET CHILLI
‘My reasoning behind PEPPER Thankfully, as veganism
becoming a vegetarian The perfect way to becomes more popular,
spice up snack time.
(and eventually a vegan) was there seems to be a wider
down to my love of animals, acceptance of it.’
pure and simple,’ she says. Want to give veganism
And while she admits a try? Before you throw out
that it can be tough when the contents of your fridge,
eating out, the hardest part slow down. Cook says the
is the criticism her nutritional key to successfully converting
HEINZ BAKED
preference attracts. ‘I get BEANS to veganism is to go bit by
loads of nasty comments,’ Pile on Albany bread bit. ‘Start by switching out
she says. ‘I don’t preach (vegan) for breakfast. one meal a week for a vegan
about being vegan but when meal and exploring various
people find out that I am one, meat alternatives,’ she says.
they always have to comment ‘And be gentle with yourself
on my “extreme” eating. Also, when you don’t get it 100%
people think I’m trying to “right”. Just like you would
say I’m better than them support a friend who’s trying
because I’m vegan, which is to quit smoking, be your own
actually the exact opposite of COCO POPS cheerleader for the positive
veganism: we think everyone, Just add your steps you’re taking, one bit
including animals, is equal. favourite nut milk! at a time.’ ■
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
79
 WORKOUT

One-Move Workout:

Back to Back SNAP NOW,

SWEAT
LATER

Squats Take a pic

of this move,
and bring it
to the gym.

Grab a buddy and earn a tighter,

shapelier booty with this move
from fitness pros – and friends
– Liz Chestang (@gosunnygo)
and Jen Rufo (@jenrufo)

1 Stand back-to- 4 Squeeze your

back with your feet butt muscles,
hip-width apart, and return
arms in front of to standing.
your chest, and That’s one rep.
shoulder blades
pressing against 5 Do up to five
each other’s. sets of eight
reps, two or
2 Lean into each three times
other, and take per week.
baby steps forward
until your toes
are 30 to 60cm
in front of you.

3 Lower your
bodies at the
same time until
your knees are
bent at a 90° angle.
(Beginners can
start with 45°.)

PHOTOGRAPHY ALLIE HOLLOWAY

LIZ AND JEN’S EXERCISE INSPO

FIT PHILOSOPHY ‘Working out with someone else always makes me go a little bit harder.’ -Jen
PRE-SWEAT SNACK ‘A banana with 2T of almond butter.’ -Liz
MANTRA ‘Exercise is a celebration of what your body can do.’ -Jen ■
 BODY LOVE

Beautify
Your Hair
About that pic… Down There
‘Last June, I posted this photo
(below, without the concealing
emoji) on Instagram and Twitter
to promote the Amber Rose
Single-use wipes
SlutWalk: a nonprofit event in will swipe sweat
Los Angeles that takes a stand and bacteria from
against victim blaming, sexual your bikini line
BY A M B E R RO S E post-gym.
A S TO L D TO KAT E F O ST E R assault, rape, double standards
LIL-LETS
and body shaming. I knew the Feminine Wipes
post would get a lot of attention, (R26,95 for 20)
Chamomile
good and bad – but that’s why
I did it. It was taken down by
P H O T O G R A P H Y T W I T T E R / @ D A R E A L A M B E R R O S E P R I C E S C O R R E C T AT T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S P R I C E S A R E R E C O M M E N D E D R E TA I L P R I C E S

Instagram, and it sparked an

argument with TV host Piers
Morgan, who told me to “put
it away”. I received comments
saying the photo was disgusting
and scandalous. But I didn’t care.
Empowering women is my life’s
work. Someone has to start these Ingrowns can be
a thing even if you
discussions, and I’m fine with don’t shave/wax.
fuelling controversy. So much A moisturising
good came from the post: it drove tissue oil will treat
a lot of traffic to the SlutWalk page. and prevent them.
SORBET Bye-Bye
People wanted to see what it was Bump Ingrown
about and, hopefully, open their Hair Eliminator
(R99,95)
minds. I learnt a lot too. (For
example, did you know studies
show that removing pubic hair
increases your risk of bacterial
and viral infections, and makes
you more susceptible to STIs?)

Do it your way
‘The best part is that, now,
girls come up to me crying, If you feel like
telling me I’ve changed their life grooming: one
side’s a razor;
and made them think differently the other’s an
– and I know they’re influencing electric trimmer.
their friends and the guys in their PHILIPS
No need to Bikini Genie Bikini
life too. That feels really cool. I’m Trimmer (R314)
trim the
not saying every woman should
hedges!
have a full bush. It’s all about doing
what you’re comfortable with, not
‘When I was younger, I bought into the stigma that what society tells you to do. I want
pubic hair was gross – that if I didn’t remove it, guys every girl who has had a partner
would perceive me as unclean, smelly, even lazy. So I did. disapprove of her body hair to
As I embraced feminism, I started thinking about all the remember that that’s a form of body
ways we feel pressured to please men – such as waxing shaming and it’s not okay. If more
or shaving our pubic hair, despite the expense and high- hair makes you feel empowered,
Coconut oil can
maintenance labour of it all. Sometimes doing so causes grow it! I feel a lot sexier with hair help soften hairs.
bumps and cuts, which, ironically, can turn guys of … and – more womanly, more confident. (Use this on your
make us feel less confident. All for something that’s naturally It’s so fuzzy and cute. Bonus? My pubic area – not
occurring! So I decided to bring back the bush. boyfriend thinks it’s beautiful.’ ■ on the vulva!)
PALMER’S
Coconut Oil
Body Oil (R65,95)
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

81
 MIND HEALTH

Going after big

new goals (like, say,
running a marathon
or learning to speak
another language)
may be desirable –
but it’s also daunting.
If you don’t feel like you’re
crushing it from Day One,
you’re more likely to give
up altogether, says clinical
psychologist Anna Kress.
Plus, when you’re given
a large but vague target
(be happier this year, get
in shape), your prefrontal
cortex – the part of your
brain responsible for
goal-directed behaviour
– can’t tell which steps to
prioritise and ends up being
less effective in helping
you achieve your goal.
Your solve? Micro-
goals. Setting small,
stupidly achievable
objectives is the key
to rocking life. Quickly
making progress – even
if it’s in baby steps – is
more motivating than
achieving something
major, according to
a recent study in the
Journal Of Applied
Psychology. Fun-sized
ambitions allow your
brain to manage your
mental resources more
effectively. In fact, your
entire noggin loves going
micro: whenever you hit a
teeny milestone, it releases
dopamine, a feel-great
chemical that motivates

START
you to repeat the behaviour.
‘Over time, mini-goals
become habits that are
rewarding and wired into

SOMETHING!
Set a goal? Go small or go home
BY K R I S SY B R A DY
our brain,’ says Kress.
She suggests starting
with no more than three
specific nano-goals at a
time. Keep reading for
more success strategies.
 B I G FA I L
Be asleep by
10pm every night.
S M A LL W I N
Get up at about the
same time every day.
Sleep is everything. But not
everyone’s body clock allows
them to conk out at 10pm,
says sleep specialist Michael
Breus, author of The Power Of
When. If your natural circadian
rhythm doesn’t align with a
certain strict bedtime, you’re
setting yourself up for failure.
Forcing yourself won’t help.
A smaller, easier hack is to set
your alarm for about the same
time each morning. ‘When you
open your eyes, light turns off
the faucet in your brain that
controls the sleep hormone
melatonin, and wakes you up,’
says Breus. ‘When you get up at
the same time each day, your
body will fall into a rhythm
that’ll help you feel sleepy at
a similar time every night.’
Start with weekdays, and
eventually rise and shine at
the same time on weekends.
It’ll keep your new snooze
schedule on fleek all year.
B I G FA I L
Meditate twice a day.
S M A LL W I N
Do a few five-minute guided
sessions per week.
Trying to jump-start total Zen can leave you the very opposite
of chilled, says Kress. For many, meditation (especially sans
P H OTO G R A P H Y A L L I E H O L LO WAY/ S T U D I O D
B I G FA I L
Live at your
standing desk.
S M A LL W I N
Walk for 30
minutes a day.
Constant sitting is worse for
your wellbeing than smoking.
But committing to being on
your feet 24/7 isn’t the answer.
‘Standing for eight hours isn’t
that much better than sitting
for that long, because your
body still isn’t moving much,’
says certified personal trainer
Krista Stryker.
Ditch your too-intense
goal: rather walk around for
30 minutes every day. ‘This B I G FA I L B I G FA I L
can make a huge difference Break up with Work out
in your health by getting you junk food. every day.
outside and moving,’ says
Stryker. No need to knock out S M A LL W I N S M A LL W I N
the full 30 at once: walking to Swap in one healthier Exercise 90
the grocery store and cruising treat each month. minutes a week.
around with your dog can all Going from chip queen to In addition to being
add up. If 30 minutes starts kale fiend may actually make unrealistic (some days you
to feel too easy, set your next your cravings harder to beat, #JustCant), working out on
benchmark at one hour – and says registered dietitian Kelly the daily is bad for your body.
get moving first thing in the LeVeque, author of Body Love. It prevents muscle recovery
morning, during your lunch ‘The minute we say we’ll never and ramps up your risk of
break and after dinner to hit eat something again, we drool injury, says certified personal
your mark. over it even more,’ she says. trainer Anna Victoria, creator
That’s because going cold of the Fit Body Guides. To
turkey on your faves can make get after your goals without
you feel deprived, increasing overdoing it, start with 45
your cravings, says registered minutes of cardio and 45
dietitian Keri Gans, author minutes of strength training
of The Small Change Diet. per week. You can combine
Cue nacho face-plant. the sessions into 90 minutes
Instead of banning all or break them up over two
your junk-food baes at once, days. And yes, you’ll see results
reduce your intake by tackling – especially if you’re currently
one at a time (fizzy drinks doing nothing, says Victoria.

guidance) can feel beyond frustrating – or just straight-up in April, chips in May), says ‘Starting small makes hitting
impossible. That you? Start with briefer trials, and enlist LeVeque. Replace each with the gym easier to fit into
some help. Apps such as Simple Habit and Meditation Studio a healthier option (cool drink your schedule, and gives
offer tutorials for inner peace, enabling you to boost your calm becomes sparkling water, your body time to adjust,’
in short bursts. Every little bit counts, says Kress. Lowering your chips get traded in for corn she says. ‘If you’re consistent,
heart rate for five minutes reduces the levels of stress hormones crackers). Gradually phase those workouts will add up.’
– and by kicking off your Om habit in a small way, you’ll learn the out unhealthy food and you’ll Once you feel like you could
skill without getting restless, slowly building up your tolerance make over your whole diet by do more, add a third session
for longer sessions. When those five minutes begin to fly by, the end of the year – without to your week – preferably
you’ll know it’s time to try 10 … or even 20. feeling the loss. a HIIT one. ■

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

83
‘I Got

Botox
in My

Vagina’

‘MY HUSBAND AND I HAVE
ALWAYS HAD A GOOD SEX LIFE.
We met when I was 19 and
have been married for almost
20 years. I never thought I’d
lose the ability to have sex
with my own husband.
‘My name is Jennifer* and
I suffer from vaginismus. It’s
a term I’d never heard before
being diagnosed. It means
the muscles in my vagina
contract involuntarily
whenever anything comes
near my genitals, making sex
impossible and causing me to
lose my confidence entirely.
‘It all started when I found
out I had breast cancer at the
end of 2013. I started chemo in
April 2014, had a mastectomy
shortly afterwards, then began
hormonal therapy. The more
I continued with the therapy,
the drier my vagina became,
which eventually made sex
excruciating. It was bad enough
losing my breasts; to lose my
sex life as well was devastating.
‘My oncologist explained
that oestrogen levels do drop
when undergoing hormonal
therapy, which can make the
membranes of the vagina
thinner and less flexible,
and produce less lubricating
fluid. I was shattered. Her
solution was that I try to use
a lubricant during intercourse.
Lube? Are you kidding me??
When that didn’t work, she
prescribed me with Vagifem,
BODY
A S TO L D TO JA I M E WA D D I N GTO N
a small tablet that you put into
your vagina twice a week. It
releases a hormone to restore
the levels of oestrogen and
enhance moisture. It helped
to a certain extent but sex was
still incredibly uncomfortable
– nowhere near as pleasurable
as it had been pre-cancer.
It eventually became more
of an issue, but there was
nothing that I was aware of
that could help. My husband
was supportive, but it was very
frustrating for both of us. I’d
pretty much given up hope
of ever enjoying sex again …
until the day I was waiting for
a checkup with my oncologist,
and I picked up a magazine
that featured an article that
would change my life.
‘The article spoke about
a treatment that could help
with vaginal dryness. I showed
it to my oncologist; she said
she knew nothing about it.
I followed up on the article
and found Dr Natalia Novikova
– the first certified aesthetic
gynaecologist in South Africa,
based in Cape Town. I made
an appointment to see her;
after a consultation and a
physical exam, she diagnosed
me with vaginismus.’
‘Vaginismus is an
involuntary contraction of
the muscles in the vagina,’
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
85
says Novikova. ‘When
anything – such as a penis,
fingers, dilators or a tampon
– is inserted into your vagina,
it’s incredibly painful or even
impossible because of the
spasm of the vaginal muscles.
There are all kinds of triggers
of vaginismus, from sexual
assault to yeast infections,
vaginal dryness and bladder
infections. Even religious
views can have an effect,
or being scared of intercourse
because of potential pregnancy.
Once women experience such
pain, the mind and body can
develop a conditioned response
to penetration. The body learns
to expect pain, which causes
the pelvic muscles to contract
to protect against that pain.
The problem is that the
tightening of these muscles
actually causes more pain.’
‘I’d never suffered from
vaginismus before I’d gone
through cancer treatment,’
says Jennifer. ‘It was clear
that my body was reacting
to what I was going through.
Novikova explained that the
vaginismus was essentially
an emotional reaction – I was
anticipating the pain. I would
tense up before anything
even happened.
‘She told me about a laser
treatment called FemiLift –
vaginal laser rejuvenation. It’s
supposed to reverse changes
to a woman’s intimate parts
that occur through childbirth,
ageing or hormonal changes
(as was the case with me).
The minimally invasive laser
treatment helps to tone the
muscles of the vagina and
rebuild the collagen of the
vaginal walls, making it
more moist. I thought to
myself, “This is hope!”
‘About a week after
having the treatment, my
husband and I tried to have
sex, but to my dismay it was
still very painful. I went back
to Novikova. This time, she
recommended I try a vaginal
Botox treatment along with
the FemiLift. “Botox?”
I thought. “For the vagina?”
I was hesitant. It sounded
odd, painful, intimidating.

But the truth was I couldn’t
bear how uncomfortable sex
was – I had nothing to lose.’
‘Botox is not just for wrinkles,’
says Zak Schabort, founder
of the Cosmetic and Dental
Emporium in Cape Town
who offers accredited Botox
training to doctors. ‘Botox or
botulinum toxin A is derived
from a form of bacteria, and is
used medically for conditions
such as excessive sweating,
migraines or, in this case,
muscle spasms. When it’s
injected into the targeted
muscle, it temporarily blocks
nerve impulses that tell it
to contract. Botox causes
a weakening or paralysis of
the targeted muscles, which
lasts up to four months.’
‘The night before the
Botox treatment, I put
on a numbing cream,’
says Jennifer. ‘Just before
the procedure, I also took a
painkiller. General anaesthesia
can be used for more serious
cases. My doctor used a tiny
needle to inject Botox into
the muscles of my vagina.
I didn’t feel any pain and
had no discomfort after
the treatment.
‘Two weeks later, my
husband and I had sex.
We actually managed to
have sex. Good sex! I couldn’t
believe it. After one treatment,
the difference was remarkable.
I can’t explain the emotional
and physical relief. After
losing my breasts and
experiencing vaginal
dryness from the hormonal
therapy, my confidence was
shot. When I couldn’t have
sex, I didn’t feel sexy. But
Botox helped me reclaim
my confidence – I finally
felt like myself again.’
BODY
‘This is an important move
for women’s health in South
Africa,’ says Novikova. ‘In the
past, all we could offer for the
treatment of vaginismus was
psychological therapy and
the use of vaginal dilators.
It’s incredibly exciting that
a new, effective treatment is
now available. Even better:
it’s typically a once-off
treatment. Injecting Botox
into the vaginal muscle stops
the vagina from contracting
– it breaks the vicious cycle.
The effects of Botox wear off
completely after a while, but
the effect of a normal sex life
during this period can heal
vaginismus completely.’
‘Three sessions of FemiLift
cost me R15 000; the Botox
was R6 000,’ says Jennifer.
‘Medical aid didn’t cover it.
But it’s important for women
to know there is an option.’
‘A gynaecologist trained for
the vaginal Botox treatment
can advise you on how many
units you’ll need, so you can
get an idea of the cost before
committing,’ says Schabort.
Novikova says, ‘On occasion,
I have to repeat the injection
after the Botox has left the
system. But I expect patients
to have easy, pain-free vaginal
penetration four to six weeks
after the procedure.’
Although Botox has been
approved by the US Food
and Drug Administration
and CE-approved by the
European regulatory body,
there are many unregulated
and counterfeit versions out
there. Not only that – there
are also many unqualified
practitioners administering
Botox. Yikes! So how do you
make sure that you’re in
good hands?
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
86
What’s
the O-Shot?
There are other injections
out there to improve things
down there. Jo’burg-based
Dr Nicole Kanaris ofers
the O-Shot, which helps
increase clitoral sensation,
strengthen tissue around
the urethra and stimulate
tissue regeneration in the
G-spot, increasing sensation.
The injection can also help
increase lubrication.
During the process,
numbing cream is applied
to genitalia, a consultation
is done with the doctor, and
blood is drawn. (Not from
your vagina, don’t worry!)
The blood is spun in a
centrifuge, separating out
platelet-rich plasma (PRP),
which is then injected into
the clitoris and vagina.
We watched someone
have it done IRL (true story),
and the patient said it had
been painless – and it took
just three minutes!
‘PRP contains growth
factors,’ says Kanaris.
‘When these are injected
into an area, they stimulate
regeneration of that area,
increase sensation in the
area and build up collagen.’
To find out more, e-mail
drnkanaris@gmail.com.
‘It’s critical to have the
procedure done by a qualified
medical doctor experienced in
injecting Botox,’ says Schabort.
‘A gynaecologist with special
training in aesthetic medicine
is ideal. Ask the doctor whether
they’ve had official training
in cosmetic injections, and
are a certified injector. You
may also ask to see the bottle
to make sure it’s the real deal
– Botox Botulinum Toxin Type
A or Dysport Botulinum Toxin
Type A.’ Never be afraid to ask!
‘What disturbed me most
throughout this process was
not the pain but the fact that
there is great silence around
this issue,’ says Jennifer.
‘Women rarely talk about the
problem, and many doctors
don’t know how to treat it.
When I raised the concern
with my oncologist, there
was very little knowledge,
empathy or concern. It was
as though nobody even
acknowledged the impact
this has on physical and
mental wellbeing. I know
there are women who have
vaginismus from a young
age and never speak about
it. Had this Botox treatment
been more widely known and
more readily available, I would
have escaped a lot of pain.
‘I highly recommend this
to anyone struggling with
this issue. It will help you
reclaim your sexuality and
PHOTOGRAPHY CHRIS HEADS/TRUNK ARCHIVE
confidence – and by seeking
treatment, we can encourage
continued research and
awareness, so that women
don’t have to endure this
pain for the rest of their
life. Everybody deserves
to have a good sex life.’ ■
*NAME HAS BEEN CHANGED

Gynae Info
5 Questions
Gynaes
Ask Their
Gynaes
eir
) ejaculate can contain sperm,
Dr Lindi Murray and
Dr Ilana Johnson are
our COSMO gynae gurus.
Together, these clued-up
ladies own Lila, an ob/gyn
practice in Cape Town
– and they’re here to
answer your questions
Am I too old for
the HPV vaccine?
Human papillomavirus
(HPV) is responsible for
cervical cancer; infection can
be prevented with a vaccine.
Although the vaccine should
ideally be given at the age of
11 or 12, there’s a ‘catch-up’
option until the age of 26. By
PHOTOGRAPHY GETTY IMAGES
26, most people have already
been exposed to HPV – it’s the
most common STI globally.
For some people older than 26,
such as those not yet sexually
active or with one previous
(monogamous!) partner,
WORK
the risk of HPV exposure may
be low. If this is you, the jab
is probably still beneficial.
Do I need to test for HPV
with my Pap smear?
If you’re over 26, yes. The HPV
test can be done at the same
time as your Pap smear. If both
tests are negative, your chance
of developing cervical cancer
is low. You can then delay your
next Pap smear to three years
later (if you don’t have other
worrying symptoms). If either
of the tests is positive, your doc
will likely request a follow-up
or a shorter interval between
Pap smears. Detected early,
HPV is manageable.
I don’t like hormonal
contraception. What
are my options?
Always discuss options with
a gynae. Depending on your
lifestyle and health history,
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
87
hormonal options may be best
suited for you. That said, here
are non-hormonal options:
Sterilisation is permanent.
Do it only if you’re done having
kids, or never want them.
A Copper T intra-uterine
device (or copper pearls) is
like the Mirena but it doesn’t
release hormones. It’s a great
long-term option, although
some women can have an
allergic reaction to copper.
Barrier methods include
condoms, diaphragms (a cup-
like device placed over the
cervix a few hours before sex),
and cervical caps (similar
to a diaphragm). You have
to remember to use them
before sex, and know how to
insert/place them properly.
Condoms also prevent STI
and HIV infection.
The fertility awareness
method or rhythm method
(with or without withdrawal)
means tracking your cycle and
having sex when you’re least
fertile. You’ll need to record
the length of six to 12 cycles,
and determine the length of
your shortest/longest cycles
and when you’re least fertile.
Apps such as Natural Cycles
can help, but this method is
unreliable, requires planning
and limits your sex life.
Withdrawal is when your
partner withdraws his penis
before ejaculation. This takes
self-discipline and places the
control in the hands of your
partner (not yours). Also, pre-
so this method isn’t reliable.
Until what age can
I safely put off having
a baby?
Women in their late 30s
are about 40% less fertile
than women in their early
20s. Medically, a woman is
considered to be of ‘advanced
maternal age’ at 35 (gulp). By
45,99% of women are unable
to fall pregnant spontaneously.
It’s important you only start
a family when you’re ready –
but it’s something you should
think about before 35. Once
you’re trying, consult a doc
if you’re not pregnant within
six to 12 months. Heading for
35 or older and not ready yet?
Talk to a gynae about freezing
your eggs.
I get a sharp pain in
my lower abdomen.
Should I worry?
If the pain is mid-cycle, it’s
probably ovulation pain. This
is normal and can be felt either
on the left or right. Severe pain
that doesn’t resolve, especially
with nausea, vomiting, a
decrease in appetite, fever
or a positive pregnancy test
must be taken seriously.
Visit your doc ASAP. ■
 SUBSCRIPTIONS

GET 35% OFF THE COVER PRICE WHEN YOU SUBSCRIBE TO COSMO
FOR 12 MONTHS – AND GET A RD E HAMPER WORTH R950

WHY
SUBSCRIBE?
Get your COSMO
before anyone else
PLUS
Free delivery straight
to your door

P H OTO G R A P H Y I STO C K P H OTO.C O M

PRINT: R293 BONUS: The hamper includes the new Yardley Raincoat Mascara – an invisible, water-resistant top coat
DIGITAL: R235 that’ll set and shape your lashes and make any mascara waterproof for locked-on wear that lasts.

TWO EASY WAYS TO SUBSCRIBE

VISIT SCAN
1 DOWNLOAD THE SNAPSCAN APP
FROM YOUR APP STORE
2  SCAN THE QR CODE FOR PRINT
OR DIGITAL AND PAY. FILL IN YOUR
ADDRESS TO COMPLETE PAYMENT.
PRINT: R293 DIGITAL: R235

SUBSCRIPTIONS QUERIES:
 087 405 2221 BECOME PART CosmopolitanSA cosmopolitansa CosmopolitanSA
subs@magsathome.co.za OF THE TRIBE

TERMS AND CONDITIONS: The subscription ofer is applicable to 12-month paid print and digital subscriptions. The above ofer is only applicable to South African residents. The first 50 subscribers will
receive a Yardley makeup hamper worth R950. Please allow four to six weeks order-fulfilment time when placing your print subscription order. By providing your e-mail address and/or phone number, you
are giving COSMOPOLITAN permission to communicate with you via these channels, unless you end your correspondence with ‘NO’ to opt out. This offer is valid until 30 April 2018.
W Gi -
o op
o d
You
Go oBY J U L I E VA D N A L
The reason GOT (no,
not Game Of Thrones)
is so major? In a word:
orgasms. The position
ups your odds of climaxing
during sex, as your most
sensitive interior and
exterior spots can be
stimulated at the same
time, says sexologist and
relationship expert Megan
Stubbs. That double play can
seal the deal on satisfaction.
At least 70% of women need
clitoral stimulation in order to
O from intercourse. Yet riding
cowgirl only ranked third
– behind missionary and
doggie style, two moves that
don’t offer as much clitoral
attention – in the ‘favourite
position’ part of Skyn Condoms’
2017 Millennial Sex Survey.
Unacceptable! It’s time to
recognise girl-on-top as the
hot move it is for both of you.
If the promise of ecstatic
trembling isn’t incentive
enough, here are five more
reasons to hop up there.

1 All the
stimulation
Thanks to gravity, climbing
on top means your partner
can go deeper than an
M Night Shyamalan plot.
The pose can also stimulate
your G-spot, the small area
a few centimetres inside you
on the front of your vaginal
wall that, for some women,
Sex That
is ultra-sensitive and can Ends in the ER
bring on supersized orgasms,
One study found that half of all
says sexologist and sexuality
penile fractures occur during GOT
coach Juliet Allen, author of
sex. If you’re not angled right and
Ecstatic Sex & Deep Intimacy.
you come down too fast (or he slips
To find out which depths feel out), you may hear a popping or
best, straddle his waist with cracking sound – and his cry of pain.
your legs on either side of his To avoid a trip to the hospital, don’t
hips. Move your knees closer slam onto him if you’ve risen high
to his body for shallower enough that only the head of his
thrusts or further away penis is inside you.
for deeper plunges.
 LOVE

2 Control is yours
GOT is a power pose
for a reason: you decide the
speed and direction of the sex
(no jackhammering allowed).
‘You’re the boss, which can
feel really empowering,’ says
Stubbs. Try setting an OMG-
worthy pace by starting slow
and grinding your clitoris
against your partner’s body,
then speeding up as you sense
your pleasure building and
you can see your lover is also
about to lose it. Feel free to
bring in some teasing too,
by slowing it way back
down – you’re the dom
in this session, after all.
3 Easier access,
everywhere
Being on top leaves all hands
on deck – and free for touching.
POWER UP
YO U R L I M B S
Run yours up and down his he’s looking at, know this: he’s
chest and torso, stopping definitely not critiquing the
Getting on at the nipples, which can way your boobs and stomach
top can make be a major pleasure centre are moving. What’s more likely
you feel weak for men and women. Then going through his head? ‘I’m
in the … thighs. put your partner’s hands to not gonna last much longer!’
Gain strength
work on your own breasts
and endurance
with this leg as you hold a small vibrator 5 You’ll never get
exercise by against your clitoris. Stubbs bored (promise!)
fitness instructor also suggests having your As long as it feels good, there’s
Dyan Tsiumis. mate pull your hips down as no wrong way to position
you swivel them, upping the yourself on top. You can try
Hot hip bridges pressure against your clitoris. a straddle with your knees
Lie on your back on the bed, or turn around so
with your knees
bent and your 4 Off-the-charts you’re facing your mate’s feet
heels on the floor intimacy (reverse cowgirl) – or stretch
near your butt. Extra arousal and warm, your legs out in front of you
Raise your hips fuzzy feels? Another GOT and use your arms to move.
up and hold for win. The position allows you And at the risk of sounding
three seconds, to hold intense eye contact like Dr Seuss, you can do it in
clenching your
glutes, then
during sex, which can help a chair. And on the floor. And
lower. Repeat to solidify your bond. If you on the stairs. ‘Modification is
15 times; do can’t gaze down at your mate the key to this classic’s lasting
four sets. without worrying about what appeal,’ says Stubbs. ■

Girl-on-top is like the best fro-yo shop: so many options! Customise your pleasure
by choosing one of these positions (adapted from COSMO’s Sexy Sutra), then a motion:

THE POSITIONS
P H O T O G R A P H Y N I C K O N K E N /A U G U S T I M A G E I L L U S T R AT I O N S J E N N Y Y U E N

You-and-Eye-Gasm The Coffee Grind-Her Frisky Business Spanks-a-Lot

Mount him and lean In this girl-on-girl pose, Have him sit on a chair, He sits with his legs out;
all the way back until straddle just one of then bind his wrists you straddle him in reverse
you’re bracing your her legs so that your together with a silk tie. with your legs extended,
arms on the ground. clitorises are aligned. Face him, and saddle up. torso on his thighs.

THE MOTIONS
BOUNCE Use your legs to raise and lower your pelvis onto his penis.
SWIRL Swivel your hips in a circular motion to feel him all over your outside and inside parts.
ROCK Shift your hips forward and backward to rub your clitoris against his pubic bone.

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

91
 The
First-
Date
Move
That Can
Seal – or
Sink –
Your
Bond
BY A L E X KO P E L
 LOVE

That’s right. In reality, she had only

exchanged a few messages with this
match, who seemed to have decent
dating potential. But that’s all it took
for her to start painting a dreamy,
Insta-worthy feed of their future. This
is how she explains it: ‘The moment
I find out the smallest detail about a
guy I’m interested in, some instinctive
part of my brain begins envisioning
what our life together will be like. If
I see a pic of him on a boat, I’m like, “Yay!
Weekends spent sailing with no care in
the world!” If he mentions a wine farm,
I’m like, “Our trips to the winelands will
be such fun!” Whenever he introduces
another piece of info about his life, it
starts again. And again.’
Mackenzie’s dating mind-set is
such a habitual thing she even gave
it a name: montaging. You know, like
in all those romcoms and TV shows
that take viewers through a rosy-hued
timeline of a couple’s love story – aka
any Kate Hudson movie, 500 Days
Of Summer, and even Pixar’s Up.
And guess what? It turns out
‘I can already that many other singles do it too.
see us cuddling Think about the last time you met
on holiday…’ someone you liked: did your mind
leap to an image of the two of you
on honeymoon in Bali? Or perhaps
spending a cosy weekend morning in
bed together? Whatever the specifics,
that’s montaging. Welcome to the club.
But is this often-mushy projection a
useful tool that helps nudge a dynamite
first kiss forward – or could it ruin the
fun of dating someone in real time?
Consider these pros and cons.

USING MONTAGING TO ATTRACT LOVE

Your mind is so ‘Having a vision and – you’re more likely to prevent you from be very useful,’ says
powerful that there’s feeling optimistic find ways to get them. staying in a not-right psychologist Paulette
definitely some truth about it can give When dating, this kind romance. If you notice Koufman Sherman,
in the saying, ‘If you you motivation to of thinking could lead that you two are veering author of Dating From
can dream it, you be proactive.’ Plus, you to change the of course early on, you The Inside Out. On a first
can achieve it.’ As new research shows desired traits on your might bow out sooner. date, if you’re imagining
clinical psychologist that when you imagine profile or seek out a But the key is to a second, that’s all
Melanie Greenberg, the things you want – a more sensitive mate. remain grounded. good. But if you’re
author of The Stress- salary raise, tighter abs Another benefit: ‘When balanced with pondering what you’ll
Proof Brain, says, or, yes, a loving partner montaging could reality, fantasising can name your kids? Well…

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

93
 LOVE

‘Of course
the kids
will get his
fab hair…’

A little happy daydreaming

is harmless. But for montaging
to be worthwhile, it pays to
‘We’ll obvs think only of the near future.
get married ‘When you meet, ask yourself
in March!’ useful questions such as, “How
does this person make me feel?
Do we laugh, hold hands and
talk easily? Do we have things
in common? Am I comfortable
The fast-track mind- healthy relationship, looks or choice of in predictions with him/her?”’ says Sherman.
set does have trouble according to a study date spot. Because of how nasty the ‘This information can help
spots. If you feel like in the Journal Of what if it turns out inevitable break-
you gauge your compatibility
you want to marry Experimental he doesn’t believe up will be with a
a dude before you Social Psychology. in marriage (and new person before pretty accurately.’
Then, if a solid future with

I L L U S T R AT I O N S J O H A N N A G O O D M A N P H O T O G R A P H Y G E T T Y I M A G E S
even know his middle Next time you that’s something they even have their
name, chances are sense that you’re you want), or that first quarrel. (Usually, this person seems imminent,
you’re over-valuing getting way ahead his temper is shorter that’s because they let your imagination loose by
him, says Greenberg. of yourself, stop the than the chilled vibes have gone through a envisioning scenes of what your
Rather than living in runaway train in your you imagined in your previous heartbreak actual life would look like. If you
the present, you’re mind by staying in pretty little fantasy? and are preparing
want a family, picture him or her
fabricating a person the moment. Ask ‘If you don’t spend for the worst as a
who doesn’t exist questions about time getting to defence mechanism.) as a parent. If you want to travel,
(or, at least, not your date’s passions, know someone, This behaviour can imagine him or her going with
that you know family, friends, work, you could be in for actually cause you you. Specific scenarios can help
of yet). Assuming and past, advises a rude awakening,’ to radiate negativity, you sense your feelings about the
you two are ‘made Sherman. This says Sherman. says Sherman. The person’s strengths and weaknesses,
for each other’ at approach will help Speaking of end result? A self- and whether they’re going to be
an early stage can you understand gloomy situations: fulfilling prophecy
also add pressure who he really is, not all montaging that can kill any a fit for you in the long term. If,
that interferes instead of who involves happily-ever- potential romance after that, your gut is telling you
with the natural you think he will after scenarios. Some before it has a chance it’s a go, we give you permission
growth of a real, be based on his CV, people get caught up to heat up. to dream on, girl! ■

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

94

Fhatuwani Mukheli, our guy with
all the answers, is here to help
Q/ On a second date, I paid
for our bar tab, which was
quite high. My date then
asked how much money
I make. Why does he care?
He may have a bit of a gold-
digger personality in him. On
the other hand, perhaps other
women he has previously dated
have never paid or even ofered
to pay the bill, so he might have
been surprised when you decided
to pay for the bar tab. I don’t
think you should go so deep into
it; he probably just asked out of
curiosity. Although, next time,
make sure the tab is on him!
Q/ I think many of my BF’s
jokes are inappropriate and
offensive. How do I tell him?
Honesty sounds like the best
policy. The more you delay
telling him, the more it’ll annoy
you. Hopefully he thinks he’s
P H OTO G R A P H Y I STO C K P H OTO.C O M
being funny and just needs
you to give him a reality check
on why he isn’t funny (and how
he’s being ofensive). Sometimes
we just need someone else to tell
us how it is. If he still doesn’t get
it, ask yourself whether you have
the same values in common.
LOVE
Q/ How do I get my partner
to cuddle me more after sex?
He just reaches for his phone
instead! Ugh.
For many guys, cuddling is
crossing a line from casual to
serious: maybe he’s not 100%
sure where you guys stand? If
you’re casually hooking up, post-
sex snuggles may feel like you’re
entering relationship territory.
If you want to keep it casual,
something as simple as letting
him know that cuddling is part of
the pleasure for you – and that it
doesn’t mean things are getting
more serious – is a great place to
start. Want it to signal something
more? Then that’s the convo you
should be having first, before
talking about spooning.
Q/ After my fiancé got
back from a bachelor party,
I found a text from a girl on
his phone. He swears that
nothing happened. Could
he be lying?
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
95
Q/ I ended things with a
hook-up buddy recently, but I had
sent him a lot of sexts. Do guys delete or
keep photos of people they’ve been with?
TBH, it’s likely he’ll hang on to them. If that bothers
you, let him know that you’d appreciate it if he deleted
the photos, and that him keeping them makes you
feel uncomfortable. Hopefully he’s mature enough
to listen to you. Console yourself with the fact that
a lot of us have been in the same position. If he posts
or shares any of the photos without your consent, you
can report it as a privacy breach or seek a protection
order against him under the Domestic Violence Act
and the Protection from Harassment Act. If he shares
anything on social media platforms, you can also
report him and have him banned – and there
is potential for legal recourse.
The fact that you were Let him know it’s so that
checking his phone is ringing you can calm your fears
alarm bells for me. Do you rather than to hunt for
trust him? It’s time to have dirt. If he says no, then
a courageous conversation, this isn’t about that text
starting with being honest – it’s about the trust in your
about checking his phone. relationship and whether he
Instead of presuming he’s has something to hide. You
cheated, let him know how need to make a call on what
seeing the text made you kind of relationship you want
feel. Focus on the hurt or to be in. Don’t ever settle –
anxiety he’s caused you, but also don’t jump to any
giving him a space to be conclusions until you’ve
honest about whether had an upfront chat with
or not he’s strayed. bae. There’s a chance he
Now that you’re talking, was randomly messaged,
ask him whether you can read didn’t respond and has
through his messages together. ignored it. ■
 p
e
A It’s smart to be cautious.
According to a 2017 survey,
Honest answers to your most private questions. BY J U L I E VA D N A L 45%of men and 16% of
women aged 18 to 34 have
shared a sexy photo without
the subject’s permission –
and that can happen with
videos as well. ‘Creating
a sex tape can be erotic
and hot, but you want to
be mindful of the fact that
one of you could potentially
make it public if you fight
or break up,’ says sex and
relationship therapist
Megan Fleming. Maybe
just film a steamy kissing
session while you’re clothed.
Or if you’re cool being nude,
only film yourselves from
the waist up, then delete
the vid after watching.

o b
o o
o eo e
o
od o
s

A Sure! But no-strings-

attached sex isn’t always
realistic, says Justin
Garcia, a sex researcher
at the Kinsey Institute.
He coauthored a study of
more than 500 undergrads,
which found that while
people’s reasons for hooking
up do vary, 51% of men
and women said they did
it hoping for a real romance.

It’s also important to know
that genital stimulation and
arousal can elevate the body’s
levels of oxytocin and other
hormones linked to feelings
of love and attachment. So
if you’re looking for a casual
fling, tell your partner.
(But don’t be shocked
if you – or your lover
– become invested.)
o your bodies. Start on your
o e
o her back (a big erogenous
A Sex is like self-tanner
– it’s possible to overdo it.
While everyone has a different
threshold, getting it on every
hour (or, for some, more than
once a day) doesn’t just zap
your energy. All the friction
could leave your vagina with
small tears … and you with
a not-so-fun urinary tract
infection (UTI). Make sure
you have plenty of lube on
hand, says gynaecologist
Leah Millheiser, director of
the Female Sexual Medicine
Program at Stanford
University. Silicone varieties
P H O T O G R A P H Y D A N I L N E V S K Y/ S TO C K S Y P R I C E C O R R E C T AT T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S
last longer than water-based
ones. Also, peeing before and
after every round is a must
to prevent UTIs.
WTF IS
LOVE
Use lube, take it slow, and
try shallow-penetration
d positions such as spooning,
e o e which will prevent him
from going too deep. If
the deed’s already been
A Try introducing a done and you’re in pain,
third party into your take a warm bath with a
hanky-panky: the Fifty few drops of coconut oil to
Shades Freed Awash With soothe the area around your
Sensation Massager Wand lady bits, says gynaecologist
is perfect for moving along Sherry Ross.
SO’s shoulders, then move
it down, working your way
o
towards the small of his or
zone for some). Then pass
it over for your turn. You’re o
relaxing your muscles and
releasing hormones that
prime your body and
o o
mind for sex. A Unless you’re willing
to conduct a forensics
investigation on the
b used condom (yuck),
you can’t. You’d need to
see an MRI of his brain
or monitor his sympathetic
o R2 450 at
Matildas.co.za
nervous system for increased
activity that happens during
A Even though most vaginas climax, says urologist Alex
can expand to fit most penis Shteynshlyuger. Any ‘typical’
sizes, there is such a thing signs (like heavy breathing
as just too big. Before you or a John Mayer-ish O face)
get busy again, talk to your could just be his acting skills.
guy about a plan of action to But as long as you’re both
make intercourse feel great. enjoying yourselves, there’s
(He won’t mind hearing really no need to go PI on
about how huge he is!) his peen… ■
It’s like nap time for a dude’s penis. Post-orgasm, most men aren’t able to get an
erection again for a while. In general, the younger the guy, the shorter the period –
although there are some who can go again virtually right away and others who need
an entire day. If you want round two ASAP, use your mouth and hands on his other hot
spots to recharge his arousal. ‘Continue kissing and caressing his shoulders, chest and
back,’ says sexologist Emily Morse, host of the ‘Sex with Emily’ podcast. ‘His member
might need a break, but his brain will be receptive and, eventually, you’ll be able to tell
when he’s coming back online.’ Boing! Or, while you wait, have him pleasure you instead.
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
97
 THE LOVE COACH
M AT T H E W H U S S E Y
ll b
1 3 Dudes on
‘You don’t
remember
‘OMG, I’m
a sweaty
Trimming
my name,
do you?’
mess. I look
disgusting.’
Their … Trees
Maybe you say This is what A recent study published
this to call him I like to call
out or even self-defecating in JAMA Dermatology found
to be playful, – as in, after that 67% of men groom their
but name- receiving a nice pubic hair. But who are they
shaming just compliment
comes off from a guy manscaping for? We asked
as insecure. (‘You look a few pruners…
Instead, help great!’), you
him and say, just … crap all
‘Hey! We met over it. Not
at X’s party. I’m only are you
Lesedi.’ This rejecting his ‘It’s 100%
shows him you attempt to for my GF.
are easy-going flirt with you,
and don’t take you’re also
She’d kick my
yourself too revealing your ass if I didn’t –
seriously. insecurities. otherwise, I’d
Next time, probably never
say: ‘Aw, thank do it.’
-JARED, 27
you. You just
2 made my day –
especially after
that tough
‘Oh, you yoga class!’
know,
nothing
much.’ 4
Such a vague
answer to ‘So,
what’s new?’ ‘Between us,
doesn’t help she’s having
continue the some issues
conversation. with her ex.’
From now Maybe you’re
on, take this just making
question as small talk, but
an invitation to spilling the
offer a positive beans about
detail about people you
your current both know PERCENTAGE OF
life: ‘Actually, makes him
I’ve been question MILLENNIAL MEN WHO
planning your loyalty. HAVE RE-WORN THE
a trip to Instead, focus SAME CLOTHING DUE
Mozambique. on talking TO A ONE-NIGHT STAND.
I can’t wait!’ people up. SOURCE: TAYLRD MEN’S CLOTHING COMPANY

Want even more ways to

flirt? Download Matthew’s
free ‘9 Magic Texts to
Send Any Guy’ at
9texts.com/cosmo.

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1

98
 Decode His Instagram Likes
‘I feel an Pamela Rutledge, director of the Media
enhanced raw Psychology Research Center, shares
element of sexuality
being bare. And let’s what’s behind his double taps
face it: a guy’s parts
look larger when he
doesn’t have a fur
burger above
and below.’
-SEAN, 30

‘It’s super- Insta models Pets or animals

awkward if, in ‘If he looks at lots of them, he ‘This might be a sign that
the act, the girl could be very body-focused,’ he’s ready for a relationship,’
stops and pulls says Rutledge. If it’s real lurve says Rutledge. He loves a loyal
a hair out of her you want, he may not deliver. companion, and so do you!
mouth or teeth.’
-JEFF, 25

‘If you make

sure your boys
are shaved, they
always get
more attention.’
-COLIN, 27
Travel or nature pics Food porn or recipes
Spontaneous adventures Cooking is a caretaking
are a priority with this guy. His activity. He’ll most likely
willingness to sweep you away be in touch with your needs
can keep things interesting. – including hunger pangs.
T R U N K A R C H I V E T E X T TAY LO R A N D R E W S , F R A N K K O B O L A
PHOTOGRAPHY GETT Y IMAGES, AMANDA MARSALIS/

5 Things
That Turn You The feeling Fear! It shares
Him On scratching When you of sliding some common
his back. throw on his into a bed If you know
– From (This has its dress shirt in that has how to play
physical elements
with arousal, so
Normal to own name: the morning … new, clean guitar. So his brain thinks
acarophilia.) with nothing sheets random,
No Way! under it. on it. but true.
he’s scared …
but also horny. ■

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

99
 ADVERTORIAL

Perfect
Selfies,
Anyone?
The Samsung Galaxy A8
combines superior tech with a
value-for-money price tag. Here
are four things we love about it

1
STYLISH LOOKS
It’s made of premium metal and
glass, making it sleek and fancy
AF. You also have four colours to choose
from: black, orchid grey, gold and blue.

2
STRONG SELFIE GAME
The Samsung Galaxy A8
understands exactly how to
capture you. The dual front camera
with live focus allows you to take any
kind of selfie you want, from close-ups
with a blurred background to portrait
shots with a clear background.

3
CRISP IMAGES
Advanced camera technology
ensures you capture sharp
images – even in low-light conditions.
The status of our prayers? Answered.
P H OTO G R A P H Y I STO C K P H OTO.C O M

4
NEXT-LEVEL RELIABILITY
The Samsung Galaxy A8
is water-, sweat- and dust-
resistant. It’s ready for whatever
your life throws at it! ■

FOR MORE INFORMATION, connect with Samsung on social media: SamsungSouthAfrica samsungsa  SamsungSA
 ‘I Did a
Complete
Career
180’
What happens if you decide in your
mid-20s or 30s that you want a career
change? And is a career 180 even viable
if you’ve spent the last few years (or a
decade) studying and grafting to make it
in a specific industry? These three women
did just that: threw out their old jobs and
embarked on something new. Here’s how
they did it, and why it was the best
decision they ever made
BY B U S A N G S E N N E

JESSICA BONIN, 34
Then Film producer
Now Tea connoisseur
and shop owner
Capetonian Jessica Bonin
thought she’d find her purpose
in film: she loved performance
and creative direction, and
studied drama and theatre
before doing an honours
in film production. But
the demanding nature of
the industry and repetitive
commercial work made her
question her choice. ‘I had no
passion for what I was doing.
It was soul-destroying and it
lacked purpose.’
‘I felt trapped
by my career’
‘I tried to navigate away
from commercial work but
I struggled with the nature
of the film industry and work
availability. I found myself on
commercial projects again
and again. I moved to Jo’burg
to get involved in more creative
projects but that didn’t make
me any happier, so I moved
back to Cape Town – and
the cycle continued.’
WORK
‘I was willing to
risk everything’
Bonin’s turning point came
when she realised nothing
would change unless she made
a change. ‘I was complaining
to a friend about my work;
then, I saw a producer 20 years
older than me complaining
about the same thing,’ she
says. ‘I realised if I didn’t
change something now, that
would be me in 20 years.’ So,
at the age of 27 and nearly a
decade into her career, she
quit. ‘I wanted something
that fuelled my soul. I wanted
it so badly, I was willing to
risk everything.’ That’s when
Lady Bonin’s Tea was born.
Yup, you read that right: tea.
‘What could I do
that wasn’t out
there already?’
‘Tea discovered me!’ says
Bonin, now known as Lady
Bonin, owner of an artisanal
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
102
tea parlour on Cape Town’s
Long Street as well as a range
of tea products. ‘I decided to
look at the skills I had. I’d had
waitress gigs since I was 14,
and experience in hospitality,
so I thought starting a cafe
would be easy. Tea became the
element that would create the
environment: a place where
people could connect. But the
more I delved into the idea, the
more it became about the tea.
I wanted to do tea differently,
so I asked myself: what about
tea do I want that is not out
there? Takeaway tea. At the
time, not even Starbucks was
selling takeaway tea. I bought
a caravan because I had barely
any start-up capital and it was
a means to get my product to
market without renting shop
space. I used tax rebates from
working in the film industry
over the years to accumulate
the R50 000 I needed.’
‘I questioned my
decision all the time’
‘I questioned whether I was
making the wrong decision
all the time. No-one could
understand how I could
make money selling tea from
a caravan, or how it could ever
lead to a larger business,’ says
Bonin. ‘Business is risky. I’ve
had to learn that there’s a flow
to things: when I had anxiety
it was because I was on the
brink of something big. Trial-
and-error is part of the process
– you have to fail to grow.’
‘I realised I’d
found my “thing”’
To establish her brand, Bonin
used social media. ‘My first
step was to contact bloggers
with a high reach. I sent a few
samples to influencers; they
tweeted about them. The rest
was the magic of the caravan:
that sold itself. I was contacted
by magazines and media
outlets that wanted to feature
this new concept. Six months
into the business, I realised
I’d found my “thing”.’
‘Now I have the
freedom I craved’
‘I designed all the packaging
myself and learnt how to use
Photoshop so I could continue
to improve my brand design.
I responded to what the market
wanted while maintaining
my ethical standpoint of
plastic-free packaging
and organic produce.’
Just over seven years since
her career 180, Lady Bonin’s
Tea is a flourishing brand. ‘I’ve
sacrificed so much – a steady
salary, job security. When all
my friends were partying and
going on weekends away, I was
saving every penny, working
every hour. It’s taken years
of 16-hour days, seven days a
week, to get to this point. But
the long-term reward is worth
it. Now I have the freedom
I was craving, something to
call my own, opportunities
to create – and so many new
adventures on the horizon.’
 M&CSAATCHI ABEL/21900/E/01
1
Apply
your favourite
mascara and
leave to dry

2
Apply
water resistant
Yardley Raincoat
to lock in your
look

3
Apply
Raincoat to
shape and
set brows

CLEAR COAT CONFIDENCE

NEW

L AST I N G LO O K
RAINCOAT MASCARA
Invisible. Water resistant. Topcoat for lashes and brows.

KATLEHO TSOKU, 34
Then Restaurant owner
Now Social entrepreneur
Katleho Tsoku thought her
dreams had come true when
she opened her own restaurant
in Jo’burg at 24. But it would
prove to be a bittersweet
failure that would lead her to
the career she was destined
for: social entrepreneurship.
‘I wanted to
start my own thing’
‘I’ve always loved hosting and
creating experiences,’ she says.
‘I’m a hospitality graduate;
I spent four months at a
Radisson hotel and two at a
Hyatt hotel. But I wanted to
start my own thing: I’d fallen
in love with the idea of owning
a hotel in my early 20s.’
‘I was broke
and had to make
a tough decision’
‘When I was 24, I opened my
restaurant. It was self-funded.
I’d gone to banks, but the first
thing they wanted to know
when I asked for a loan was
what collateral I had. I didn’t.
Those that said yes required
a huge stake of my business.’
So with her mother’s help,
Tsoku opened Bliss at Jo’burg’s
44 Stanley. But the pressure
soon became overwhelming.
‘I looked at my peers living
their life and not struggling
to make ends meet. And here
I was, at 27, having thought
I’d found my purpose in Bliss
– but I was broke, my mom
was broke and I had to make
a tough decision. I was on my
way to work when I realised
I couldn’t do it any more. My
restaurant supervisor had
phoned to say the suppliers
forgot to deliver milk. I lost
it. In the middle of an aisle at
Pick n Pay, I cried my eyes out.
WORK
I’d had so many moments
when Bliss wasn’t doing well
but I’d brushed them off and
made them work. This time
was different: it was a wake-
up call. Achieving goals is
never easy – but it shouldn’t
make you miserable.’
‘There was a lot
of heartbreak’
‘I’d fought to keep Bliss alive
for two and a half years. The
biggest struggle was funding:
my mom had limited capital,
and I had to cut our losses.
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
104
There was a lot of heartbreak,
and a lot of shame associated
with failing.
‘I had three questions.
Had I failed myself? Had
I failed my mother, who’d
believed in me? Had I failed
all the women aspiring to
start their own business?
But eventually I learnt that
I hadn’t failed any of these
people, or myself. It took
me a year of processing but
I began to make peace with
it. I told myself I didn’t fail
– the restaurant failed.’
‘I had nothing
left to lose’
After Bliss’s closure, Tsoku’s
new role found her entirely by
accident. ‘Spark South Africa
found me. I became very open
about my failure and I was
doing speaking engagements
about what I learnt from the
whole experience. I caught
the attention of Aaron and
Kaitlin Tait, who’d been
running Spark in Australia.
They needed someone on the
ground in South Africa, and
they approached me. I’d been
working for myself, so I was
reluctant to work for someone
else. But then I thought, girl,
you’re broke, you’re depressed,
what do you have to lose?
‘In retrospect, I realise
I was suffering from impostor
syndrome. I tried going into
hospitality because I thought
that’s what I knew, and it
failed. Now I’d been asked to
run Spark and I was asking
myself: am I capable? Am
I enough? Turns out I am!’
‘It takes a lot to keep
believing in yourself’
‘Since then, my journey
has seen me move back into
entrepreneurship – but this
time in my true calling: social
entrepreneurship. I co-founded
YHer, a partner of Spark, as
a female-focused accelerator
for women’s issues. In 2016,
I took YHer continent-wide.
The defining moment was
having former First Lady
Zanele Dlamini Mbeki
acknowledge the programme
as being impactful.
‘You have to be resilient. It
takes a lot to keep believing
in yourself. Before I do any
decision-making now, I ask
myself what my intention is.
Is my intention in alignment
with my true self? If I can say
yes, I’m on the right track.’

SVETLANA
DONEVA, 33
Then Journalist; CNBC
executive producer
NowCommunications
manager at an NGO
A fast-paced journalism
career was what Svetlana
P H O T O G R A P H Y K A T B O R C H A R T / T H E L I C E N S I N G P R O J E C T. C O M , C L A I R E G U N N P H O T O G R A P H Y, H A M I LT O N S A G E N C Y M O D E L @ S I M P L Y B I A N C A A L E X A
Doneva had always hoped
for – but 10 years in, she
needed a new direction.
Little did she know she’d
discover a passion for early
childhood development.
‘It all seemed
so glamorous’
Growing up, Doneva
wanted to be a writer.
‘Journalism was a natural
career choice for me,’ she
says. ‘I studied politics and
economics at Rhodes. A
few weeks after my finals,
my mom drove me to my
first job interview – for a
reporter position at Times
Media Group in Jo’burg.
At the time it all seemed so
glamorous. Times Media
Group met all of my 21-
year-old expectations;
I longed to join the ranks
of well-dressed women
and intense men in the
newsroom. And I did!’
For 10 years, Doneva
focused on financial
journalism, working
in TV, print and online.
Eventually, she’d worked
her way up to executive
producer at CNBC Africa.
‘My biggest fear
was the unknown’
‘Around the time I turned
30, I realised I needed a
change.’ Ten years of high-
pressure stakes and long
hours had taken their toll.
But stepping away from
what you’ve always known
is scary. ‘My biggest fear
was leaving the known
and the comfortable to
enter a sector that was
unknown to me. I worried
I wouldn’t be successful
and that I’d compromise
my career trajectory.
‘I spotted an opening
for a communications
manager at a small NGO
called Ilifa Labantwana,
which operates in early
childhood development.
It was a field I knew very
little about, but after some
research I quickly became
convinced this was where
my future was. In my
research, I learnt that our
success in life depends on
the care we receive early
in life. The more I read,
the more excited I got
about the NGO’s vision.’
‘It takes time
to adapt’
Like most women doing a
career 180, Doneva had to
re-evaluate her skills and
identify what she could
use in the new field, and
where she’d need more
experience. ‘I got the job
and the first year was a
difficult transition,’ she
says. ‘My lack of specialised
knowledge was glaring.
I took stock of my skills,
which was sobering. I’d
mastered a skills set that
M&CSAATCHI ABEL/21900/E/02
was useful in journalism,
but not necessarily in
communication. This
uncomfortable process is
pretty normal for anyone
switching careers; it takes
time to adjust and adapt.
‘I had no professional
network in the sector
I was going into. Despite
my research, I knew very
little about early childhood
development. The work
processes were different;
so were the success metrics.
The office environment
was also totally new – not
as noisy or fast-paced as
I was used to. I also had
to get used to a whole new
way of making decisions.’
During this transition,
it was key for Doneva to
reach out to others for
advice and support. ‘The
process of developing your
skills is made easier with
the help of a mentor who
understands you and what
you want to achieve. It’s
quite difficult to see the
bigger picture on your own.’
‘I believe 100%
in what I do’
‘My career has always been
important to me. I believe
100% in what I do; nothing
I’ve done after my career
change has felt like a
sacrifice,’ she says. Would
she do anything differently? NEW
‘It’s been three years and
I’m still challenged daily, R A I N C OAT M A S C A R A
but I wouldn’t change
a thing. The more we
learn, the more we grow.
H OT
It’s exciting to learn and
expand my skills set. YO G A?
Switching careers has
been amazing – and D O N ’ T S W E AT I T.
I feel lucky to have Invisible. Water Resistant.
had the opportunity Topcoat for lashes and brows.
to work in two sectors
that I really love.’ ■

It’s Always
Moving Forward’
Thabiso Mahlape, 34, is the publisher taking flight with BlackBird Books,
an imprint of Jacana Media. Created when she was 31, it aims to champion
black stories. ‘It’s very important for me that the voices of black women
are heard,’ she says. Read on for her career lessons and advice
Always go
into a situation
with a solution.
I’m a guest lecturer at
the University of Pretoria
and I tell my students
to always be prepared
when starting a new job
– you must know what you
can offer. When I used to
prep for interviews, I’d say,
‘Working for this company
will help me grow.’ I’ve since
changed my mind-set – you
need to go in there knowing
that you can make a difference
from the start.
The greatest
gift women have
been given are
other women.
Publishing is very lonely
in terms of demographics,
and the disparities relate
to both race and gender.
We need to change the
literary landscape. Positive
change can occur with the
help of initiatives such as
the Abantu Book Festival.
COMPILED BY BUSANG SENNE
Identify your strengths and
see how you can contribute
to the fight.
You have
to be willing
to stick it out.
WORK
because of my junior job
title. Can I just be a publisher?’
They agreed. A few months
down the line, I thought, ‘But
my salary is not a publisher’s
salary; can I get a raise?’
You need to know your
worth. Have a plan and
carefully plot your next
steps. I’m very impatient,
but if I believe in something
and I know I’ve calculated
it correctly, I’m willing to
wait. Don’t leave things
to chance.
Are You
a Budding You don’t
Erotica Writer?
COSMO’s Erotic Short Story have to come
Competition is here, and Thabiso will to every fight.
be a judge! The winner will have their Here’s the thing about
story published in COSMO and win
R5 000. Head to Cosmopolitan.co.za success: it’s not just
or scan the QR code below to find out one thing. It’s a combo of
how to enter. Competition closes things – it’s always moving
31 May 2018. forward. I choose my battles.
You know when you’re first
starting out and you decide
you’re a fierce, no-nonsense
girl, and no-one is going
SCAN VIA
to mess with you? I used
to be that girl. But my line
manager at Jacana Media
said to me, ‘I admire your
fighting spirit, but I just
don’t think you should
be fighting everything.’
And honestly, if I don’t
feel like I’m compromising
myself, I’m happy to let
things go.
THABISO’S CV
2015 to present It’s okay if
I always weigh up my options. Created BlackBird Books you need a
and Evera Publishing – a
I struggle with anxiety, so
content consultant agency
time-out every
making calculated decisions that helps black writers
now and then.
means I have some sort of self-publish their work You don’t get to figure
control. When I started in 2011 to 2012 Junior out everything at once –
publishing at 26, it was in publisher at Jacana Media you should live and take
the marketing department. 2008 Completed a degree in things as they come. I’m
I told my boss I wanted to publishing at the University 34, I’m a mother – and I’m
get more involved with the of Pretoria about to move back into my
publishing. When I became 2001 to 2004 Studied dad’s house because I need
a junior publisher I said, electrical engineering a break. I need time out –
at Wits and Technikon
‘When I write to people,
Witwatersrand
and there’s nothing wrong
they don’t take me seriously with admitting that. ■
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
107
 WORK

h t to Do h n
Yo Don’t Kno
Scan to take our
free quiz to find
hat to Do
your best work.

SCAN VIA
BY H E L E N WA L L AC E

I thought I was going

to study fine art after
school. I decided to
take a gap year, which
turned into four, during
which time I changed
my mind. After a year
at varsity doing a BA,
I decided it wasn’t for
me and opted to study
special-effects makeup
instead. After a year of
that, I realised I didn’t
want to do that either.
(See the pattern here?)
I had an existential
crisis: at 24, shouldn’t
I know exactly what
I wanted to do with
my life? But here’s the
thing: you shouldn’t.
Or, at least, it’s okay
if you don’t.
 WORK

and finance as a great track for Through my own journey

FIND YOUR CAREER SWEET SPOT you, opt for a broad business I inspired other women almost
According to business consultant Jim Collins’s book Good To Great or finance course to upskill by mistake – it was organic.’
(R449 at Takealot), finding your career sweet spot is about asking
yourself three questions, and finding an answer that intersects all three: yourself without having to Moosajee quit her job and
lock down an exact career yet. redirected her career towards
fitness. ‘My parents thought
What am
If a degree isn’t for you I was making a mistake and
I great at? ‘Consider a one-year higher- that I wouldn’t be financially
certificate course in something secure. But I don’t just work
practical, such as personal in the gym – I have an online
training, computer skills or business and use social media
Sweet basic business principles,’ to sell diet plans, for example.’
Spot What will says Miller. ‘You’ll achieve Your career is not set in
What brings people pay a recognised qualification stone: you can find or even
me joy? me (enough) while learning valuable skills, create a job you’ll be excited
to do?
and get the space you need to to wake up for every day.
make informed career choices.’ Not knowing which career
Start by listing your answers to each question, then see which path to pursue can feel like a
answers can answer all three questions. For example: if you’re great If you want catastrophe but it really isn’t
at spotting people’s talents and working with people gives you joy, paid experience the end of the world. Explore
could a career in HR ofer the salary and personal growth you want? There are paid learnerships your options, continue to learn,
that only require matric for and keep your eyes and ears
Now, hone in on 4 Take time off. entry and offer on-the-job open. Your career sweet spot
that sweet spot: If you’re working, put in leave training. Visit Vunasa.com, will probably change several
1 Tap your network. to get distance from the office. Umuzi.org, Serviceseta.org.za times during your career –
What do your friends think Are you questioning your and www.careerhelp.org.za/ and that’s totally okay, too. ■
you’re good at? What advice career because you’re burnt workexperience-opportunities.
or help do they ask you for? out and just need a break? Or Many large businesses also
2 Try it on the side first. does time away confirm that advertise paid learnerships What Drives You?
Think being a vet is right up you really hate what you do? on their company websites. Q A pay cheque Accountancy,
P H O T O G R A P H Y S T U D I O F I R M A / S TO C K S Y P R I C E C O R R E C T AT T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S S TO C K I S T S O N PA G E 1 2 5

your alley? Volunteer at an
animal shelter before making
any big commitments.
3 Speak to a specialist.
That is, anyone already in the
industry/job you’re interested
in. Do they work in a team?
By themselves? What are their
pressures? Biggest rewards?
See whether their answers
resonate with what excites
and motivates you.
Take these learnings and apply them to your career sweet
spot diagram to identify your best fit. Got a clearer picture?
Now you need to figure out how to get there…
TO STUDY OR NOT?
If you want a degree
‘Start with a broad-based
bachelor’s degree with subjects
that pique your interest,’
says career-development
consultant Annette Miller.
If you’ve just written exams,
the same can be true: take a
break to assess whether you
truly hate the subjects or are
just sick of school work.
5 List the things you love.
Do you enjoy structure? Do
you get a kick out of ditching
your to-do list to troubleshoot?
These things are key to
understanding the industry
and environment for you.
‘This gives you a year to
understand which fields
could excite you long-term.’
Then pick more specific
subjects in your next few
years. If your career sweet
spot results suggest numbers
It’s okay to change
your mind
Career indecisiveness affects
everyone: stats indicate that
the average person changes
their career five to seven times
in their working life. ‘In the
past, people would work for
an organisation for 40 years
until they retired,’ says Miller.
‘Today, we are more inclined
to seek significance, work-life
balance, and the potential
to invest and retire early.’
That’s what drove personal
trainer and gym owner Rushda
Moosajee. After five years as
a designer in publishing, she
wanted to try other avenues.
‘I wanted to give more and be
more,’ she says. ‘I was driven
by the positivity and strength
that shifting your body could
create in other areas of life.
banking, finance, consultancy
and law are known for paying
well. Other options are coding,
engineering, tech and fintech.
Q Creativity Advertising,
publishing, marketing, fashion,
photography and product
design are all possibilities.
Q Being part of a team
Construction, scientific
research, advertising and
retail are great options.
Q Problem solving Project
management, consultancy
and event coordination require
agility and troubleshooting.
Q Making clients happy
Hairstyling, salon therapy,
hospitality and medicine or
nursing could be your calling.
Q Effecting change Options
from the nonprofit sector and
teaching to environmental
care might interest you.
Q Organising and
coordinating Consider
ofice administration, HR or
being an executive assistant.

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

109
 WORK

10
Questions
1What is the company
culture like?
Insight into things such
as dress code, working from
home, flexitime and overall
company values is valuable
and will be essential for
your short- and long-term
success in the position,’
says O’Gorman. It also
demonstrates to the hirer
that you’re already being
in helping you understand proactive about what you’ll

You Need whether the company you’re

applying at is right for you.
‘It’s like trying to understand
the personality of a company
be able to add to the role,
and that you’re interested
in the details of the position.

to Ask – if your personalities clash,

it might not be a good fit for
either party,’ says O’Gorman.
4 Are there growth
opportunities
in this role?

at Your It also shows you care about

your working environment –
a positive sign to a potential
This question shows your
ambition and desire to be
a part of the company for

Next
employer that you’ll invest the long run – and it’s an
in them if they hire you. opportunity to explore
whether or not the company
What do you do as invests in its employees’
2
Interview
It’s not all about what the interviewer
a company to ensure
a productive working
environment?
First up, your interviewer
career by providing funding
for additional training and
skills development.

asks you: impressing your next boss

comes down to the questions you ask
hears ‘productive’ – a great
buzz word to remind them
you’re efficient and looking
them, too. Here’s what you need to know to give them great return
on their next investment:
BY L I S A K AT Z
you. But it also helps you
understand how you’ll be
We’ve all heard the dreaded line: looked after if you’re hired,
‘Do you have any questions for us?’ and whether you’ll have
support in executing your
Do you usually nervously shake your role. Does the company
head? Well, in your next job interview, invest in team development
you’re not going to do that. Instead, opportunities such as off-site
you’re going to glean vital info on the brainstorms or team-building
vacancy and impress your interviewer exercises? ‘You’re working
with strangers, so you need
with insightful questions that show to know what the company
you mean business – and that you does to ensure a collaborative
will be a great addition to theirs. working environment,’ says
‘Interviewing is a two-way street,’ Farah Fortune, director at
African Star Communications.
says Jessica O’Gorman, recruiter for
Uber’s Middle East and Africa regions. Is this a replacement
‘Yes, the company is assessing whether
you’re the right fit – but you should
3 roleoranewposition?
‘Understanding whether
absolutely be doing the same. You should you’re coming into something
fresh that you can mould and
leave every interview feeling comfortable develop as your own versus
that you’ve gained insight on the role and picking up where someone
the company.’ Start with these queries: else left off is important,
5What are the day-to-
day responsibilities?
‘It’s extremely important to
ask about the responsibilities
of the role – you want to be
sure that the role is right for
you and that you’re aware of
the company’s expectations,’
says Tamara Wolpert, general
manager at recruitment firm
Viv Gordon Placements. Even
better, it offers you a tactical
opportunity to boast. Does the
role include client meetings?
Great! Tell the interviewer
why that’s perfectly suited
to you and your experience.
What do you like
6 about working
at the company?
This isn’t just about getting
the interviewer to give
you the inside track on
the company’s culture – it
has a psychological effect
too. According to a 2012
study published in the
journal Memory, feelings
of nostalgia can encourage

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

110

social connectedness, so
by getting the interviewer
to reminisce about happy
moments, you’re increasing
the chances that they’ll
associate you with all the
good feels – which will be
great when they’re considering
your application.
What are the
7interview
next steps in the
process?
Asking this question
indicates that you’re eager
to continue with the process
– and that you’re expecting
success (you go, girl!) without
appearing presumptuous.
Knowing when or if you
can expect feedback will
also allow you to formulate a
realistic timeline for yourself
with regards to following up.
Diarise the timeline supplied,
then pop off an e-mail or
personalised note politely
following up a day or two
after your feedback was
promised. It’ll keep you
top of mind.
What’s the
8 five-year plan
for the company
or department?
The answer to this question
will give you insight into the
career path for your position,
and whether it aligns with
your career goals. ‘You need
to know whether you’ll be able
to grow with the company,’
says Fortune. It also shows
that you’re looking for a long-
term career in the company,
rather than aiming to bounce
PHOTOGRAPHY ACP/ TRUNK ARCHIVE
after a few months.
What do you hope
9 the new hire will
achieve in the first three
months in the role?
‘I’m always impressed by
someone who asks me this
WORK
because it tells me they’re
focused and goal-oriented
– and that they’re already
thinking about company
targets,’ says Kim van der
Linden, head of talent at
Associated Media Publishing.
What are the
10 most important
qualities for someone
to excel in this role?
This question will ultimately Arrive early
determine whether or not enough to finish
you’re a good fit for the your cuppa!
role – and it definitely
gives the impression that
you’re driven to succeed.
Plus it’s another great
opportunity to take the
interviewer’s answer
and explain how you’ve
got those qualities down. ■
Interview No-Nos
Bad body language
Eye contact and a good posture
go a long way in an interview.
Arriving unprepared
Do your research to set you up
for success from the start. It will
show the interviewer you have a
real interest in the opportunity.
Talking badly
about your current
or previous employer
Bad-mouthing previous
employers and colleagues may
give the impression that you’re
petty, dificult to work with and
unable to handle yourself.
Arriving late
To minimise stress and show
respect, find out exactly where
you need to be and how long it
will take you to get there.
Fidgeting
It betrays your nerves and can
be perceived as disrespectful, or
like you’re not paying attention.
Answering your phone
Never check or answer your
phone during an interview –
it shows a lack of respect for
the interviewer and their time.
 ou
Y da
ee
N ntor
e e r
H wt
’s w
e o ge
hy
t
a
– e
o
n
n
d

AN
DM
E LE
VA
NS

ho S H A RI N
EM
ENT
ZIK

BY

Wo ke s ho h
mento s ea ave hat’s not one word of a lie.

to doub e mo ep
A mentor can be the secret
weapon you need to get
ahead at work. In fact,
a nually than t
hose 50% of Millennials believe
mentoring is the key to success
ho don t – yet they’re not receiving it. So COSMO has
SO UR CE: FIN AN
CIA L MA NAGEME
NT MAGA ZIN E
decided to help a sister out by giving the only
guide you’ll ever need to all things mentorship-
related – and we’re also giving you the chance to
win one of 10 kick-ass mentors from companies
such as Unilever, the Harvard University Center
for African Studies, She Leads Africa and COSMO.
Read on for success!
 WORK

WTF IS A You feel

MENTOR?
It’s easy to confuse your work BFF,
your IRL BFF or even your mom for
a mentor – but in a professional
sense a mentor is much more than
a sounding board, adviser or life
coach (although they are all those
things too). ‘A mentor is someone
who has the skills and experience
to be able to guide you critically,’
says Shivani Gopal, founder of
The Remarkable Woman. ‘It’s
someone more experienced
than you are; someone who
holds a much more senior role
You want
to succeed
You are at a
crossroads
like you’re
stagnating
‘If you want to be the Not everyone has a clear ‘If you’re in a very
best in your capacity vision for their career – hell, comfortable position
in anything, you need many of us don’t even know right now, you need a
a mentor,’ says Gopal. what career we want. It can mentor so you can get
‘If you want to be a better be a real jungle out there. uncomfortable – because
speaker, if you want to be ‘If you’re looking for a way growth comes from being
your best self or better at to create a vision you’re uncomfortable,’ says Gopal.
networking, if you want to really passionate about,
get better at one of your then you need a mentor,’
hobbies – anything.’ says Suzi Dafnis, CEO
of online mentoring

5x
– not necessarily in the same programme HerBusiness.
industry or company as you,
but certainly someone who
with
can critically advise you and yees
Emploors are five
actually challenge your actions. ment more likely .
d
They help you better plan your times promote
t
goals and make sure those goals to ge
are aligned with what you’re looking
for in life, help you re-prioritise,
and help you understand what
your strengths are as well as the
traits that don’t serve you well.’
Basically, if you want to climb the
career ladder, a mentor is your
golden ticket to getting there.

Karin Krause Wessels Blue Masoka

Marketing director Digital communications manager
at Edward Snell & Co at Associated Media Publishing;
Cape Talk radio host
‘I met Blue after joining Edward Snell & Co in
March 2017. Blue had an infectious energy ‘I met Karin at my previous company – she
* S O U RC E H E R BU S I N E S S.C O M

about her. Our arrangement transpired
naturally: she approached me wanting to
learn more about brand marketing principles.
OF BUSINESS OWNERS WHO We ended up talking about broader business
USE MENTORS WILL SURVIVE perspectives and the power of self-knowledge
IN BUSINESS TWICE AS LONG in leadership.
AS THOSE WHO DON’T.* ‘We no longer work at the same company, but
we try to meet once a month for an hour and
a half. Sometimes the conversation gravitates
to a functional discussion; other times we talk
‘A mentor is about people leadership or life in general.
someone who allows I always like to give “homework”: something
you to see the hope to ponder in between catch-ups, and to report
inside yourself.’ back on.
–OPRAH WINFREY ‘Mentorship accelerates growth. I’m passionate
about the diverse talent we have in South Africa.
By combining that talent with mentorship,
we can unleash our country’s potential.’
arrived at the right time in my life. We started
with weekly one-on-ones, and when I changed
jobs, we agreed to meet every four weeks.
‘Karin likes to let me speak, but she’ll ask
questions about my work, my personal life
and my health. I tend to talk a lot! Karin
helps to ensure I’m rebuilding my energy
and considering new perspectives. Often
she sets me homework, such as jotting down
my thoughts daily in a notebook. It’s shown
me a pattern to the way I think and helped
me efect change in my life.
‘If you’re looking for a mentor, you have to find
someone you can have open conversations
with. Honesty and good communication are
key. A great mentor will sometimes tell you
things you don’t want to hear – but it’s
important to be able to take on feedback.’

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

113
 How to Find a
Professional entor
It’s as easy as one, two, success!
?
FIGURE OUT WHAT YOU WANT
‘You need to figure out what you
want out of life – what you want
out of the next five years,’ says
Gopal. What are your strengths?
Your weaknesses? Where do you
want your career to go? What are
your short-term and long-term
goals? All the questions!
SEND PRAISE
‘Don’t go straight in and ask, “Hey,
can you please be my mentor?”’ says
Gopal. ‘Introduce yourself and start
by citing some things they’ve done
(acknowledging an insightful blog
post or career accomplishment)
to show that what’s important
to them is important to you.’
BE CONSISTENT
You and your mentor need to agree
on short-term and long-term goals
to help build a clear picture of the
mentorship objectives. Meet once
a fortnight or monthly for at least an
hour. This ensures you keep working
towards your targets and stay on track.
GET STARTED
LOOK AT YOUR OPTIONS
‘Let your peers know you’re
looking for a mentor,’ says Dafnis.
Sites such as Bssa.co.za, Seda.org.za
and Thebusinessplace.co.za can
help match you with mentors
and find support.
MAKE CONTACT
MEET THEM
‘Say, “I would love to meet with you
for 20 minutes and ask for advice
on how I could achieve some of the
wonderful things you have done”,’
says Gopal. ‘When you show interest,
people will generally say yes.’
If they’re not in the same city as
you are, suggest a Skype meeting.
MAINTAIN CONTACT
!
AVOID PUTTING ON THE PRESSURE
Be wary of the fact that mentors have
their own obligations and careers. Be
understanding of their busy schedule
by not hounding them. Send a friendly
e-mail to say you know they’re
swamped, but you’d love to meet up
when things are less hectic for them.
DO YOUR HOMEWORK
Once you find a potential mentor,
do extra research to ensure they’re
the right fit for you. What career path
did they take? What type of industry
connections do they have? Much
of this can be found on LinkedIn
or Google, or by speaking to
mutual connections.
TELL THEM WHAT YOU WANT
It’s always scary to put yourself
out there but it’s important to be
upfront about your intentions. ‘Tell
them you admire the work they do
and that you’re looking to expand
your skills,’ Dafnis says. ‘Then simply
say, “I was wondering whether you
would be willing to mentor me.”’
RECIPROCATE
When you come across good articles
or content related to your mentor’s
interests, send it to them. Mentorship
is a two-way street: mentors are just
as interested in learning from you as
you are in learning from them, so share
your successes and new findings.
 WORK

e
T he T hric
Already
Got a
Mentor?

You can never

have too many.
No, really: you can
have diferent
mentors for
diferent facets
Dr Rob Katz Catherine Hodgson Carol Osler
of your life. Plus,
CEO of Spiritpower Consulting CEO of the Hodgson Group; Senior key account manager
there’s no such global mentoring lead for the at the Hodgson Group
‘The mentorship was initiated
thing as too much Young Presidents’ Organization
by Catherine – we’d worked on ‘I’ve been working for the Hodgson
knowledge. ‘I have mentoring training locally. It’s ‘I asked Rob to be my mentor more Group for 16 years. Over the past few
many mentors,’ important that both the mentor and than a year ago. I needed mentoring years, I’ve moved into a management
says Gopal. ‘Don’t the mentee have an understanding for the transitions I’m going through, position, with people reporting to me.
limit yourself of each other’s values. Authenticity and Rob is an experienced coach and I needed to learn more management
to just one. At mentor. We meet once a month for skills, and since I report to Catherine,
is a core value. Mentoring covers
a bare minimum
both your personal and business two hours; I send Rob an agenda, and I asked her to be my mentor.
you should have
life, and goals and expectations we have measurables in place that ‘My key role as a mentee is to learn
two – one inside
your company should be addressed on a regular change as the process continues. as much as I can and pass this on
and one outside. basis. We meet typically once a ‘Carol works for our company. to my team, becoming a mentor
From there you’ll month, although I make myself She asked me to be her mentor to them. It’s taught me to step out
naturally start to available in between these because she wanted to acquire of my comfort zone, become more
find more mentors. meetings in case of emergency. more managerial skills. self-aware, and think about new
You might find a Mentorship should provide a ‘It’s important for both mentor ways to better myself and interact
mentor who really confidential, safe place to address and mentee to know their roles and with others. It’s also taught me
helps you open up challenges and opportunities.’ expectations before they start the to stay engaged, curious and
when it comes to process. As a mentee, I see my role open-minded.
networking; then as learning, driving the relationship, ‘I’m lucky to have Catherine
you might find being committed to the process, at the ofice every day. We have
one who helps coming to meetings with issues I want spontaneous mentoring as well as
you with your to discuss, being open to looking at more structured regular meetings.’
presentation things diferently, and respecting
skills as well as a Rob’s time. As a mentor, my role is to
generalist mentor be a sounding board, ask questions to
who helps you be OF MENTORS RECEIVE A
RAISE. (SEE? IT’S WORTH make Carol think more deeply about
the best that things, and share my experience.’
you can be.’ BEING A MENTOR TOO!)

TIPS TO MAKE THE MOST

OF YOUR MENTORSHIP
Julia Raphaely, CEO of
As mentioned, it’s not only mentees who gain a wealth of knowledge Associated Media Publishing
from a mentoring relationship – it’s just as rewarding for the mentors.
‘Preparation is key: it helps to
But what makes a great mentor? Gopal lets us in on some secrets:
structure your time and shows
BE GENEROUS ‘You LEARN ‘A good mentor often and where needed. that you’ve actioned key elements
really need to be giving understands they have just Don’t be afraid to make your from the previous meeting. You
of your time, your skills, as much to learn from the mentee uncomfortable – need to commit to the process and
your experience and your mentee as the mentee has that’s where they grow.’ take it seriously. It’s a big investment
expertise. A good mentor to learn from the mentor – of time for the mentor, which needs
has vested interest.’ and that’s where you have CELEBRATE ‘Recognise to be respected. Use the sessions
this really open, dynamic, achievements, not so much
as a way to track progress – if you
BE SELFLESS ‘You need two-sided conversation.’ by clinking Champagne but
to have the mentee’s best by saying, “You’ve done it, both feel you’re getting somewhere
interests at heart. It’s vital CRITICISE ‘A good mentor well done!” It’s important together, it’ll be more satisfying for
that you remain objective isn’t afraid to analyse to acknowledge how far both of you. In a nutshell: prepare
and keep their goals front critically and give you you’ve come.’ Now, go well, follow up and feed back
of mind.’ improvement feedback forth and spread success… – and commit 100%!’

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

115

Now that you know how valuable a mentor is, COSMO is giving you the chance to
win one of 10 year-long mentorships with South African women – all leaders in their
respective fields. Whatever your career goals, we guarantee one of these mentors
can help you reach them. Time to find the perfect one for you!
Bronwyn Nielsen
CEO of Nielsen Media
& Associates; chair
of the Graça Machel
Trust Women in Media
Network; former editor-in-
chief of CNBC Africa; former
executive director of Africa Business News
Award-winning Nielsen is one of our country’s
most experience broadcasters, with 20 years’
experience and programmes such as Carte
Blanche under her belt. She is the CEO of
Nielsen Media & Associates, a digital-first
company that seeks out communications
opportunities across the continent.
‘Mentorship is a secret weapon in the
journey to success,’ she says. ‘My career motto
is: always make sure you’re on a learning curve,
and never make the same mistake twice.
‘There is no greater accolade than playing
a mentorship role in shaping the careers of
young South African women to help them
achieve their dreams.’
Holly Meadows
Editor of COSMO SA
Prior to being appointed
COSMO’s editor in July
2017, Meadows oversaw
the commercial content
division at Associated Media
Publishing. Her career has included interning
at Vogue, working in Mumbai’s Bollywood
industry and teaching English in the Himalayas,
as well as more than a decade in publishing.
‘We live in a world where unemployment
and gender inequality present real obstacles
for young women,’ she says. ‘I’m passionate
about empowering women to be a force for
change, social justice and revolution. I believe
in the power of sisterhood, women supporting
women, and the important role that having a
strong leadership figure in a young woman’s
life plays in shaping her future.’
WORK
Y Obenewa
Amponsah
Executive director at
the Harvard University
Center for African Studies
(CAS) Africa ofice
Based in Jo’burg, Amponsah
provides strategic leadership for CAS,
developing programmes and collaborative
initiatives across the continent. Prior to her
work at CAS, Amponsah was the CEO of the
Steve Biko Foundation. She is passionate
about racial equity and justice, with expertise
in nonprofit management, African afairs and
personal development.
‘There have always been women in my life
who took the time to listen, advise, correct and
– above all – encourage me to believe in myself
and my talents. When we unleash the power
and potential of women, we’re able to create
new possibilities not just for individuals, but
also for families, communities, nations and
ultimately the entire continent.’
Bonnie Mbuli
Actress; MC; author;
TV presenter
Mbuli has lit up our
screens in everything
from Backstage and
Rhythm City to films such
as Drum, Catch A Fire and Invictus. First
discovered in Soweto by an agent when
she was 13, Mbuli has established herself
as one of our most eminent actresses. She
currently presents on Afternoon Express.
She’s won acclaim for her memoir Eyebags
& Dimples, in which she documents her battle
with depression.
‘I’m passionate about mentoring young
South Africans because we don’t make it on
hard work alone,’ she says. ‘Our success is an
accumulation of the encouragement, support
and knowledge we draw from others.’
C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8
116
Mechell Chetty
Vice president of
human resources
at Unilever Africa
Chetty joined Unilever 20
years ago. Her experience
spans everything from supply
chain management and finance to her current
role in HR.
‘I specialise in building leadership and
capability – unlocking potential in young
talent that will lead for the future of Africa,’
she says. ‘I believe that every person,
irrespective of age or experience, needs
up to five mentors: a senior person in your
organisation, a peer, a friend, a family member
and someone younger or more junior than you.
‘Sharing my experiences in my business and
personal life, as well as my leadership journey
and passion for young talent development,
will be of value to young women who aspire
to be future leaders in the corporate world,
government, NGOs and as entrepreneurs.’
Swaady Martin
Entrepreneur; writer;
founder of Yswara,
Akrafo and Shift Within
Martin is a serial
entrepreneur with more
than 17 years of experience
in business management, brand building and
new business model development. Her career
has included senior management positions at
corporates such as General Electric, and she has
an MBA from the London School of Economics.
‘I am a mentee myself, and I have benefitted
hugely from mentor-mentee relationships,’ says
Martin. ‘I believe that we create “magic” with
others. I love the fact that I can rely on other
talented people to support me in my areas of
weakness, in the same way that I can support
others in their weaknesses with my strengths.
This is the beauty of life and Ubuntu in action.’

Happy Ralinala
Businesswoman; co-
founder of Northern
Fleet; president of
the Businesswomen’s
Association of South Africa
She’s been a managing
executive of private and wealth banking for
Barclays Africa, and spent seven years in senior
positions at FNB. She currently serves on the
board of Small Enterprise Finance Agency,
the Businesswomen’s Association of South
Africa and the Africa Advisory Board of the
China Europe International Business School.
‘I have more than 20 years of experience in
financial services, and have dedicated my time
to mentoring female entrepreneurs,’ she says.
‘I believe in the power of mentorship because
I’ve been a beneficiary of a network of mentors.
Mentorship is a mirror that helps you see the
world diferently. It helps you build the belief
that you’re capable of producing, executing
and achieving. When we empower women, we
raise the quality for everyone. When women
lead, they not only lead their own entities –
they lead communities and feed the nation.’
Arlene Mulder
MD and co-founder
of WeThinkCode_
After seven years as
an investment banker,
Mulder left finance to start
WeThinkCode_ and pursue
her dream of a tech business that could help
democratise and revolutionise education to
deliver the world’s top tech talent. ‘Sometimes
all we need is someone to believe in us and
PHOTOGRAPHY GETTY IMAGES ADDITIONAL TEXT SARAH BROWNING-DE VILLIERS
encourage us to be bold enough to pursue our
dreams,’ she says. ‘South African women are
strong, resilient, creative. We have the power to
design solutions to create a world of possibility.’
HOW TO APPLY
1 Scan this QR code to
go to our application
page, or visit
Cosmopolitan.co.za
SCAN VIA and search ‘mentor’.
2 Tell us in no more than 500 words
which of these successful women you’d
want as a mentor, and why they’re your
perfect match.
3 Attach an up-to-date CV.
WORK
Afua Osei YOUR SHORTCUT
Co-founder of
She Leads Africa TO LOOKING EVEN
Osei has travelled
extensively, working HOTTER
for Michelle Obama in the
White House and getting an
MBA from the University of Chicago. After time
at McKinsey & Company with colleague Yasmin
Belo-Osagie, the two founded She Leads Africa,
a media company that aims to empower,
connect and celebrate a new generation
of smart, ambitious African women. Work out
‘Success in the real world is measured by
your ability to identify and solve problems,’
she says. ‘This requires you to understand
your strengths and surround yourself with
those who have the expertise and skills that
you need to develop. That’s where mentors
come in: they can give perspective, help you
see problems through a diferent lens and,
hopefully, help you find success faster.
‘If you want to build a digital tribe that
reaches people around the world or a personal
career brand that has opportunities chasing you
instead of the other way around, chat to me.’
And work it
Farah Fortune
Publicist; director
at African Star
Communications
Fortune founded African
Star Communications in
2008 with just R1 000 in her
pocket. It has since exploded into three divisions
handling celebrity and corporate PR, and event
management with clients such as Terry Pheto.
‘As women we have so much to contribute,’ Check out the free
2-for-1 ofers in our App
she says. ‘We are powerful – and I want young
women to recognise that power. For me, it’s
not about chasing money, it’s about chasing The ENTERTAINER is your everyday
passion. The money will eventually chase you.’
lifestyle savings App packed with
offers for spas, fitness, dining and so
much more. Enjoy a selection of
Those who make the short list will complimentary offers on us.
be contacted by a member of the
COSMO team for the next steps.
To be eligible to enter, you must
be a woman aged 18 to 35, a South
African resident, and able to engage Download yours today and use the VIP key
with your mentor monthly for a year, on your App card to unlock your offers
starting in July 2018. You must be
willing to put in the time and complete
the tasks that are set out for you
by your mentor for the duration
of the mentorship. All winners
will be contacted directly. ■
theentertainerafrica.com
 COMPETITION

One of 12 Elegance and

Glamour watches, worth
R2 890 per set, courtesy
of COSMO and Sissy Boy
issy Boy is one of South Africa’s
leading brands. It boasts a legacy
of fashion that includes clothing,
lingerie, swimwear, handbags and
a dazzling collection of watches. Sissy Boy
watches are a statement of confidence,
driven by style and innovation.

WHY WE LOVE THEM

1 High standards of quality

We can’t compromise on this!

2
A statement of style
A girl needs good arm candy…
Affordability
3 Time is money – but it
shouldn’t break the bank.

Visit Sissyboywatches.co.za or
connect with Sissy Boy on social media:
sissyboyjeans

Sissyboyjeans
sissyboyjeans

HOW TO
ENTER 2

1 Scan the QR
code to enter.
Go to the
Sissy Boy post
on the ‘Win’ tab at
Cosmopolitan.co.za
and enter the
keyword
SISSYBOY.
OR

CosmopolitanSA cosmopolitansa CosmopolitanSA CosmopolitanSA

TERMS AND CONDITIONS: For competition rules, see page 125 or visit Cosmopolitan.co.za/terms-conditions. Entries close on 30 April 2018.
R s
Why You
Should
Go on a
Cruise
BY S A R A H B ROW N I N G - D E V I L L I E R S
 It’s a bargain
With the rand crashing and climbing like
a roller coaster, travelling overseas can
be tricky – a flight to Europe during their
summer season can be R8 000 or more.
Ugh. That’s where cruises departing
from either Durban or Cape Town ofer
impressive value for money. How about a
four-day, three-night cruise from Durban
to Mozambique from R4 935pp, including
your accommodation and all meals? Yep,
we thought so: sold.

You get to
island-hop
without hassle
Instead of spending hours on There’s an all-you-
the Internet trying to plan your can-eat buffet every
backpacking, hitchhiking trip day. Repeat: every day!
to the various outlying islands,
On the MSC cruise we took, breakfast and lunch
let your cruise handle it for you.
were served bufet-style – with zero limitations
Excursions to islands are the
on how much you can eat or how many times
norm: most cruises dock daily
you go back for more. Even better: throughout
along their journey, with one
the day the kitchen has an array of food on ofer
or two days at sea in between.
if you get peckish, without charging you extra.
These stop-ofs also provide a
There was even a help-yourself soft-serve station.
host of activities you can book
Dinner was a seated, restaurant-style afair; again,
once you’re on board (or prior to
food on the menu was included in our package.
the cruise online). Want to snorkel
Nights were themed: one night was Italian, the

P H O T O G R A P H Y N I Q U I TA B E N TO, C O U R T E S Y O F M S C C R U I S E S P R I C E S C O R R E C T AT T I M E
or kayak? Just book at reception –

O F G O I N G T O P R E S S B U T M AY V A R Y A C C O R D I N G T O E X C H A N G E - R A T E F L U C T U A T I O N S
next Indian or Chinese (though there were also
they’ll sort it all for you, including
‘classic’ items on ofer for the less-adventurous).
getting you there and back. Want
The only thing we had to fork out extra for?
to just laze on the beach? Hop onto
Drinks. These were on the pricey side – but
one of the smaller boats ferrying
hey, when the pasta is free, who cares, right?
passengers to and from the islands
Keep booze costs down by booking drinks
during the day, and kick back and
packages online at least 48 hours before
enjoy. The boat service to visit
you board to enjoy a decent discount.
islands is included in your fare;
booking specific activities is
charged additionally.
Single? Be ready to mingle!
The brilliant thing about being on a huge boat that houses about 2 500 passengers
is that you’re surrounded by plenty of other people also in holiday mode. That means
lots of new people to meet – and kiss. In case you’re worried about approaching a
potential bae at the bufet (awks), cruises provide many less-intimidating ways to
make connections. For starters, the MSC Sinfonia has six bars, from an Irish-themed
pub to a cocktail lounge. That’s to say nothing of the nightly entertainment, from
quizzes and bingo (yup – we went to bingo and loved it) to theatre shows (you
have to pre-book, but it’s normally included in your fare) and club-style parties.
Just a tip from one girlfriend to another: you will bump into last night’s hook-up
in the bufet queue the next day.

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

120
 TRAVEL

The activity list is endless

If you’re heading to Portuguese Island, like we did, expect activity oferings such as snorkelling
(from R420pp for two hours), visiting local villages (transfers to additional islands are typically
about R230pp), walking tours (R350pp, including transfers), sea kayaking (from R180pp for 30
minutes) and dolphin watching (from R480pp for two hours). You definitely won’t be bored!
Meanwhile, on all the islands you dock at during the day, MSC sets up a dedicated beach bar
and restaurant area where you can enjoy a complimentary lunch bufet while you sunbathe.
Getting from the cruise ship to the main islands is included in your fare.

Find out more

You don’t have about MSC cruises,
to move off the special offers and
boat if you don’t the cruise calendar
want to for 2018/2019 at
Plenty of passengers spend Msccruises.co.za.
their days sunbathing by the
pool on the top deck, taking in
the 360-degree views, enjoying
the on-board spa treatments or
catching up with friends over
You never have
cofee or cocktails. There’s to worry about
zero obligation to head of drunk driving
to the islands. If the most you Drunk elevator trips, however,
want to do on holiday is move are fairly likely… The bliss of
from your cabin to the pool to being on a cruise liner is that
the bar to your cabin, a cruise you can walk everywhere –
is right up your street. even if that’s from a bar to
your bed at 2am.
It’s entirely cashless
Many cruise liners – including the MSC
Sinfonia – use a token system on board.
Pre-booked drinks or Wi-Fi packages, for
example, are redeemed via tokens you get
with your ticket or once you board. You can
buy additional tokens at designated points
on the ship using your credit card – but no
cash is accepted at any service points such
as the bars. The plus side is you don’t have
to worry about tipping (we didn’t), or walk
around with cash or do currency conversions
in your head. Handy, since our cruise charged
for on-board services in US dollars.

There’s a spa and a gym – so

something for everyone, really
You can create a If you’re a dedicated gym bunny who fears missing
package that suits you a morning workout, don’t panic: there’s a kitted-out
Booking online is easy; it’s even easier to fitness area on board. Prefer to spend your downtime
tailor your trip. Want Wi-Fi access and a face down on a massage bed? You can book various spa
free pass to enjoy as many cocktails as you sessions – from a mani/pedi to wrinkle and dermal fillers
can drink? Add these to your package after – with the cruise liner’s pros. If you want to make the
you’ve made your booking. Access to the most of your pamper time, access your profile after
gym and pool are already included in the completing your booking to add a Wellness Package
fare – and if you have kids, all-day childcare in advance – it’s generally cheaper than booking spa
in the form of a kids’ club is also included. treatments when you’re already on board. ■
 C O M P I L E D BY
M A RG OT VA N Z Y L
s

Pretoria-born Clara Jane Bjorkman, aka Baking Ginger

(@baking_ginger), has been filling our Insta feed
with #foodporn since 2015. ‘I studied photography,
so I began to shoot all the things I created,’ she says.
‘I started Baking Ginger as a place to keep my recipes
and share them with anyone who wanted to take a
look.’ Social media has been key to her turning this
hobby into a career. ‘Instagram has allowed me to
share my love for making and baking with others.
It’s been an incredible tool that’s shaped my career
into something I never dreamed could be possible.’
Here are some of her prettiest pink dishes, straight
Rose Panna Cotta from her feed.
 FOOD
Breakfast
Raspberry
Smoothie Bowl
Ingredients
For the smoothie
Ö

DVQ
GSP[FO
SBTQCFSSJFT
Ö

GSP[FO
CBOBOB
Ö


DVQ
GBUGSFF
NJML
BMNPOE
NJML
Ö
U
IPOFZBHBWF
OFDUBS
Ö
u
DVQ
SPMMFE
PBUT

DSFBUJOH
EJŪ
FSFOU
UFYUVSFT

Afternoon Snack
Layered Berry-
Chia Smoothie
Ingredients
For the bottom layer
Ö
v
DVQ
GSP[FO
CMVFCFSSJFT
Ö

v
DVQ
BMNPOE
NJML
Ö
u
DVQ
PBUT
Ö
U
IPOFZNBQMF
TZSVQ

UIFO
HFOUMZ
QPVS

For the chia layer
Ö
5
DIJB
TFFET
Ö

DVQ
BMNPOE
NJML
Ö
U
IPOFZNBQMF
TZSVQ
For the top layer
Raspberry Ö  DVQ GSP[FO NJYFE
CFSSJFT
Smoothie Bowl Ö w DVQ ZPHIVSU
DPDPOVU ZPHIVSU
Ö v DVQ BMNPOE
NJML
Ö U IPOFZNBQMF
TZSVQ

BOE
TQSJOLMF

Evening Dessert
Rose Panna Cotta
Ingredients

BMMPXJOH
TIFFUT

Ö  TIFFUT HFMBUJOF
Ö  DVQ DPME XBUFS

TVHBS
BOE

Ö  DVQT DSFBN


Ö H DBTUFS TVHBS
Ö  WBOJMMB QPE
TFFEFE 3
3FNPWF
HFMBUJOF
TIFFUT

Ö  PS 5 SPTF TZSVQ

TRVFF[JOH
PVU

Toppings (optional)
Ö 1PNFHSBOBUF
TFFET
Ö 1JTUBDIJPT
Ö 3PTF CVET GPS
EFDPSBUJPO
5
1PVS
JOUP
HMBTTFTNPVMET


QJTUBDIJPT
BOE
SPTFT
■
Layered Berry-
Chia Smoothie
$ 0 4 . 0 1 0 - * 5" / $ 0  ; "
ȍ
" 1 3 * -
   
123
For the toppings
Ö
'SFTI
SBTQCFSSJFT
Ö
$PDPOVU
TIBWJOHT
Ö
3PMMFE
PBUT
Ö
.JOU
MFBWFT
Method
1 1MBDF
BMM
TNPPUIJF
JOHSFEJFOUT

JO
B
CMFOEFS
#MFOE
VOUJM
TNPPUI
2
1PVS
JOUP
B
CPXM
3
"SSBOHF
UPQQJOHT
PO
POF

TJEF
"EE
NJOU
GPS
B
EBTI
PG
DPMPVS

BOE
ȥMBWPVS
Method
Bottom layer
1 1MBDF
BMM
JOHSFEJFOUT
JO
B

CMFOEFS
#MFOE
VOUJM
TNPPUI
2
1PVS
JOUP
UXP
HMBTTFT
PS
KBST

'SFF[F
GPS

UP

NJOVUFT
Chia layer
1 8IJTL
BMM
JOHSFEJFOUT

UPHFUIFS
PWFS
UIF
GSP[FO
CPUUPN
MBZFS
2
1MBDF
HMBTTFTKBST
JO
UIF

GSJEHF
GPS
BU
MFBTU

IPVST
Top layer
1 1MBDF
BMM
JOHSFEJFOUT
JO
B

CMFOEFS
#MFOE
VOUJM
TNPPUI
2
(FOUMZ
QPVS
PWFS
DIJB
MBZFS

%FDPSBUF
UIF
TNPPUIJFT
XJUI

GSFTI
CFSSJFT
XJUI
FYUSB
DIJB
TFFET
Method
1 1MBDF
HFMBUJOF
TIFFUT
JO

B
CPXM
BOE
QPVS
PWFS
UIF

DPME
XBUFS
UP
ÎCMPPNÏ
GPS

UP

NJOVUFT
2
1MBDF
DSFBN
WBOJMMB
TFFET
JO
B
TBVDFQBO
BOE
TJNNFS
PWFS
NFEJVN
IFBU
GSPN
XBUFS
UIF
FYDFTT
4
3FNPWF
DSFBN
NJYUVSF

GSPN
IFBU
BOE
TUJS
JO
HFMBUJOF

BOE
SPTF
TZSVQ
BOE
QMBDF
JO
UIF
GSJEHF
UP
TFU

GPS
BU
MFBTU

IPVST
6
%FDPSBUF
XJUI
QPNFHSBOBUF

TFFET
 DECOR

File holder R140,

MRP HOME

R1 500,
MRP HOME

According
to feng shui,
white symbolises
clarity, hope and
openness; pink is
calming; and pastels
make you feel relaxed
– all great vibes
for work!

Success
Your workspace should be where you’re
most efficient and creative. It’s also
where you spend the majority of your
day, so it needs to look beautiful. Here
are our top picks for a pastel-pretty desk

C O M P I L E D B Y M A R G O T V A N Z Y L P R I C E S C O R R E C T AT T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S S T O C K I S T S O N P A G E 1 2 5
R149, H&M

R6499,
@HOME

Triangle print R119,

NANAMIA DESIGN
at Superbalist

Laptop case
R300, TYPO
R699, ILLUMINA
at Superbalist

R699,
@HOME

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

124
 STOCKISTS

COMPETITION TERMS & CONDITIONS

@home  021 938 1911 The following rules shall apply to all competitions, unless other rules are specifically provided in relation to a competition:
A-List  021 422 4844 1 Competitions are not open to: 1.1 a director, member, partner, employee or agent of, or consultant to Associated Media Publishing (Pty) Ltd
Adidas  021 421 8262 (hereinafter referred to as ‘AMP’ or ‘us’) or the promoter (any person who directly or indirectly promotes, sponsors, organises or conducts a
competition, or for whose benefit the competition is promoted, sponsored, organised or conducted); or 1.2 any supplier of goods or services
Afro Grunge  060 573 5312 in connection with a competition; or 1.3 the spouse, life partner, business partner or associate, or the natural or adopted parent, child or
Aldo  011 884 4141; 021 421 5674; 031 566 6535 sibling, of any of the persons specified above. 2 You may not participate in or be eligible to win a competition if you have won a competition
American Swiss  0860 576 576 promoted by us within the past three months. You will be eligible to participate in a competition promoted by us after the expiry of three
Bacher & Co  011 372 6000 months after the date on which you won the last competition. 3 Unless otherwise stated, only one entry per person is allowed. Where more
Call It Spring  011 784 1597; 021 551 1527; 031 584 7431 than one entry is received by the same person or e-mail address, only the first entry received will be deemed valid. 4 No cash alternative
Calvin Klein  021 418 1185 to the prizes will be ofered. The prizes are not transferable. 5 Entrants must be South African citizens. 6 It is your responsibility to ensure
Castelo  011 883 8767 that any information you provide to us is accurate, complete and up to date. 7 If you use a mobile phone for entry into a competition, the
Charles & Keith  021 552 4912 telephone calls/text messages you make will be charged at the prevailing rates, which may vary from time to time. ‘Free’ minutes under
a cellphone contract do not apply. 8 You must possess whatever documents and permissions may be required in order to accept and use
Colette By Colette Hayman  021 551 7552
a prize, including, as regards to international travel, a valid passport and all necessary visa and travel documentation, which documents and
Cotton On  011 784 0218; 021 552 0726 permissions it is your responsibility to obtain at your own cost, and which documents and permissions must remain valid in such minimum
Dune London  011 685 7055; 021 529 1970 form and for such minimum period after the prize date as may be required by the relevant authorities. Any and all airport taxes are not
Europa Art Shoes H/O  011 455 0917 included in the prize and will be for the winner’s account unless otherwise stipulated. 9 Prize allocation is to be determined in accordance
Folli Follie  011 883 0565; 021 555 0811 with the allocated project budget. If any advertiser/afiliate/supplier/promoter with whom AMP works in relation to a prize fails or neglects
Forever 21  011 883 0025; 021 555 3324 to provide the prize, then it shall not be exchanged for cash, but a suitable replacement prize, to be determined at the sole discretion of AMP,
Forever New  011 883 4585; 021 419 4552; shall be provided. 10 Entrants must be 18 years or older at the time of entering the competition. 11 The winner(s) consents to his/her/their
031 265 0522 name/s, biographical details and involvement in the competition being made available to the sponsors, for publicity and prize-delivery
Fossil  021 418 0045 purposes. 12 AMP accepts no liability for any entries that may be lost. 13 Winners use the prize at their own risk. AMP and the promoter
shall not be liable for any loss, damage, personal injury or death that is sufered or sustained (including but not limited to that arising from
G -Star Raw  021 418 9000 any person’s negligence, including gross negligence) in connection with a competition or accepting or using the prize. 14 Entrants will be
H&M  0860 690 707 deemed to have accepted these rules and agreed to be bound by them when entering. These rules are legal and binding upon entrants.
La Senza H/O  021 447 7718 15 AMP reserves the right to cancel, modify or amend any competition at any time, if deemed necessary in its opinion and if circumstances
Le Coq Sportif  021 552 5068 arise outside of its control. 16 The winners will be notified by means of the contact details provided to us. If we are, or a third-party supplier is,
Lulu Belle  021 418 6263 unable to contact a winner within seven working days of first notification from AMP or its representative, the winner will forfeit the prize, and
Luxottica  021 486 6100 AMP reserves the right to re-draw a new winner under the same conditions. 17 In the event that you win a prize, you agree to the publication
MRP  0800 212 535 of your name and to appear in person in the electronic media and the print media, and you agree, within reason, to endorse, promote or
MRP Home  0800 212 535 advertise our goods or services, for which no fee will be payable. 18 You are hereby notified that you have a right to decline consenting
to your name, biographical details and involvement in the competition being made available to sponsors in terms of clause 17 above. You
Nicci Boutiques  011 262 4141 further have the right to decline being photographed for and to appear in a feature in an AMP magazine in terms of clause 17 above. Should
Steve Madden www.stevemadden.co.za you wish to exercise either or both of these rights, you shall do so by informing us within five days of the announcement that you have won
Superbalist www.superbalist.com the competition, via e-mail to competitions@assocmedia.co.za, in which e-mail you shall provide us with particularity of the rights which
Takealot www.takealot.com you wish to exercise. Should you not inform us that you intend exercising these rights within the above five-day period, you shall be deemed
The Fix  0860 104 764 to have consented to the provisions of clause 17 above. 19 In the event that you win a prize provided by a third-party supplier, the supplier
The Lot  021 424 8812 will contact you to arrange the collection thereof. In this regard, you must collect the prize at the time and date arranged with the supplier
Topshop  011 685 7070; 021 419 5900; of the prize. All correspondence regarding the prize must be directed to the supplier of the prize. AMP will not be responsible for any further
031 583 1333 correspondence, harm, damage, loss or claim relating to the provision of any element of the prize. 20 We and our third-party suppliers,
as the case may be, reserve the right to vary, postpone, suspend or cancel the competition and any prizes, or any aspect thereof, without
Typo  011 784 2485; 021 552 2635 notice at any time, for any legally justifiable reason. In the event of such variation, postponement, suspension or cancellation, you agree to
Witchery  0860 022 002 waive any rights, interests and expectations that you may have in terms of this competition, and acknowledge that you will have no recourse
Woolworths  0860 022 002 against us, our afiliates and our third-party suppliers. 21 AMP and the judges’ decision on any matter concerning the competition and/or
Zara  011 302 1500; 021 446 8700; arising out of these terms and conditions is final and binding on you, and no correspondence will be entered into. 22 By entering an AMP
031 536 6440 competition, you agree to receive communication from our brands. An opt-out will be provided in all communication sent.

up!
our k get
col tic your
lips glitt
er o
on loose n
sh ine pigm
ents

ch it.
swat
it.
try
it.
love
eyeshadow box

Available at Clicks, Dis-Chem, Foschini, Jet & Takealot.com

 ARIES TAURUS
o osco es
GEMINI CANCER LEO VIRGO LIBRA
2 1 /03 –2 0/0 4 2 1 /0 4 –2 1 /0 5 22/0 5 –2 0/0 6 2 1 /0 6 –22/0 7 2 3/0 7–22/0 8 2 3/0 8 –22/0 9 2 3/0 9 –22/ 1 0
Areyourspidey Yoursociallifeis Everythingis Vacationmode: Rockon,goal- Whereyourreal
You’re cruising sensestingling? poppin’,andnew cominguproses on!You’vebeen getter:you’refull friendsat?Start
to success. If the Payattention, peepsabound. –finally.Theseeds dreamingofa ofbigplans,now ofthemonth
becauseyour Withyourruler, youplantedin break,sogoafter narrowyourfocus byprioritising
road feels bumpy intuitionison Mercury,in Januaryatwork it.Thebeginning toafewthatwill positive
when your ruler, pointinApril. retrogradeuntil andsociallyare ofthemonthis payof.Withyour relationships.
The10thisan the15th,oldfriends comingtofruition. primetimeforan ruler,intelligent Aroundthe10th,
Mars, unites amazingdayto maywanttojoin Havesomefun adventure.Just Mercury,in you’llfeelsensitive,
with disciplined beopentonew inthefun.Career withyourtribe naildownallthe retrograde whichmayhelp
Saturn on the possibilities–but opportunities afterthe19th, details,asMercury untilthe15th, youidentify
iftravelispartof mightarise,but whentheSun isretrogradeuntil you’reextra- unhealthy
2nd, use it to yourplan,watch weighthefinancial movesintoyour the15th.Afterthe reflective.The emotionalhabits.
recalibrate. outforhurdles, implications zoneofgroup 19th,getbackto FullMoononthe Yournewself-
becauseMercury beforeacting. activities.Your thegrind–your 29thwillbringnew awarenesswill
You’ll get good isinretrograde WhenVenus creativevision hardworkwillpay opportunities. attractsomeone
news early in the untilthe15th. movesintoyour willguideyouto ofbigwithaVIP. Skiptownbefore special,anditmay
month, but don’t TAURUSGUY signonthe24th, yournexttriumph. LEOGUY thenforsomeR&R. steamupfast!
He’smoreofa lovewillrule. CANCERGUY Someoneisfeeling VIRGOGUY LIBRAGUY
act on it till after closedbookthan GEMINIGUY Workisrulinghis spontaneous… He’sinsoul- Rightnowhe
Mercury ends its usual.Arrangea He’sallabout world.That’sfine Suggestagetaway searchingmode mightseem
retrograde phase couplesmassage goingout–and …fornow.Butifhe fortwothatwill andneedsyour erratic–but
–someindulgence alwayscoming doesn’tworshiphis inspirehimin wisdomtohelphim you’reaboutto
on the 15th. willcoaxhimopen. hometoyou. queensoon,L8R! everyway. figurehimselfout. getalltheanswers.
YOUR YEAR
P H O T O G R A P H Y G E T T Y I M A G E S , I S T O C K P H OT O .C O M I L L U S T R AT I O N C I A R A P H E L A N T E X T A U R O R A
TO W E R / @ A U R O R A A S T R O P R I C E C O R R E C T AT T I M E O F G O I N G T O P R E S S S TO C K I S T S O N PA G E 1 2 5

Uranus, planet
of surprises,
SCORPIO SAGITTARIUS CAPRICORN AQUARIUS PISCES
leaves you in May 2 3/ 1 0 –2 1 / 1 1 22/ 1 1 –2 1 / 1 2 22/ 1 2 – 1 9/0 1 2 0/0 1 – 1 8/02 1 9/02 –2 0/03
after seven years. Thismonth,it’s Consideryourself Life’sawhirlright Howthehelldo Kickdistractions
allblueskiesand luckyinlove: now,sostepaway youdoallthat? tothekerbsoyou
Double down on rainbowsbecause Mercuryisin fromthemadness You’reamaster havemoretime
any changes you yourbehind-the- retrogradetill tomakesure multitasker–but forwhatreallyrevs
sceneshustleis mid-month, you’regoing bewareofletting yourengine.Focus
wanted to make. payingof.Some andthatmeans intheright somethingNBslip. onyourfinances
By January, you’ll ofyourbrightest pastbaesmay direction–and WithMercuryin whileMercury
be starting a dayswillinvolve trytosayhey.The listentofriends retrogradeuntil isretrograde
collaboration,but NewMoononthe whovoicetheir the15th,taketime duringthefirst
new chapter. beforeMercury 15thisauspicious concernsforyou togetorganised halfofthemonth,
leavesretrograde romantically, aroundthe10th. andfinishstrong. thensetsome
onthe15th, sobereadyto Bymonth’send, Heedyourintuition, moneygoals. ARIES GUY
watchoutfor swoon.Atwork, thingswillease especiallyonthe Kickbackwith
R1 499, miscommunication makesureyour upintimefora 18th.Atmonth’s yourcrew–but Chance the Rapper
AMERICAN BytheFullMoon efortsarebeing littleromance… end,youneeda don’tletthem 16/04
SWISS onthe29th,your noticed. Sweetrelief! solidhangwith wooyouinto Your man has
YOUR lovebarometer SAGITTARIUS CAPRICORNGUY thefam. whippingout larger-than-life
BIRTHSTONE willreadH.O.T. GUY Don’tholdhim AQUARIUSGUY yourwallet. plans. Keep him
Born in April? SCORPIOGUY Sparksareflying, back–goalong MrMoodyneeds PISCESGUY grounded in case
Your birthstone He’shellafocused andhe’ssofeeling fortheride.But you-time,sosay He’scraving the time comes
is the diamond, onhis9-to-5.Talk it.Ifyouaretoo, ifyoudon’tlike yestoastaycation simplethings… for him to scale
associated with aboutitoverdinner don’tbeshy:go wherehe’sheaded, forjustthetwo likehand-holding back to find
courage and afterhours. getyours,girl! hopof. ofyou. andstargazing. real success.
everlasting
love.

ARIES GAL
Elle Fanning
09/04
 QUIZ

Are You a Friend-Hopper?

1 The last
time you bailed
on plans with
a bestie was:
A When she waited
until noon to text you
HBD instead of sending
one at midnight.
B Saturday spinning but
only ’cause she was too
hungover to show last
time. Now you’re even.
C During a bout of flu.
If it’s not contagious,
you’ll hang through pain.
2 Ever been
a bridesmaid?
A You’ve been asked
but never made it all
the way to the altar.
Any hint of drama and
you’re out – for good.
B Only for those you
want in your own party.
When the day comes,
they’ll be obligated to
wear whatever pastel
shade you choose.
C Bridesmaid? Child’s
play. You’re always the
maid of honour.
3 A BFF leaks
your secret (the
one she swore
she’d take all
the way to the
grave). You:
A Delete all evidence
that you were ever close
and poof, she’s gone.
THE BREAKDOWN
B Confront her so
you can bury the axe –
but also drop hints that
your own vault could
swing open at any time.
C Put your phone
on ‘airplane’ mode
and blast Enya until
the anger dissipates.
4 Your pal
got dumped.
Your reaction?
A Pat yourself on
the back for distancing
yourself when she first
chose her boo over you.
B Plan to call, but check
your texts first to make
sure she reached out
the last time you were
feeling down.
C Ofer 24/7 phone
support while she
goes through all
the stages of grief.
5 Which Real
Housewife do
you relate to
the most?
A Teresa Giudice.
Not a single so-called
friend efs with you
and gets away with it.
B Bethenny Frankel.
You call BS when you
see it and only stick
with peeps who can
handle the truth.
C Yolanda Hadid. P H O T O G R A P H Y L U C I E H U G A R Y / T H E L I C E N S I N G P R O J E C T. C O M
Love and light solve
almost any problem.

M O ST LY A s M O ST LY B s M O ST LY C s
HAIR -TRIGGER HOPPER CONDITIONAL COMPANY LOYAL -AF FRIEND
If someone wrongs you, you’re done. It’s You’re willing to let things slide, but You stand by buds through anything,
COMPILED BY HELEN ZOOK

good to protect yourself, but reconsider
your definition of friendship before
kicking peeps to the kerb. Everyone
makes mistakes – even you! Give
some second chances – plenty of
pals will prove worth sticking with.
you have a hard time forgetting slights
entirely. Sort out major stuff that’s still
bugging you. But with minor gripes,
lose the eye-for-an-eye mentality –
and turn your relationships from
burdens into #blessings.
even at your own risk. That devotion is
a super-strength, but know when to let
go of a toxic friendship – or one that’s
simply lost its spark. Moving on will allow
you to channel more energy into mutually
beneficial bonds. ■

C O S M O P O L I TA N .C O . Z A | A P R I L 2 0 1 8

128
 I DO!
up to

50% ALL
DIAMONDS

Hurry. Offer ends 8 May 2018.

Come in store to be inspired or explore the full catalogue online: www.americanswiss.co.za