The Top 10 Personality Disorders:

Symptoms and Signs

When someone's behavior seems off, it might be more than just a mood.
There’s a “Top 10” list of just about everything these days and as the year comes to an end,
it seems that we like to do a “countdown” of just about everything. Well, here’s a countdown
of personality disorders and some questions to ask yourself if someone you’re interested in or
who is trying to get close to you is sending up red flags when you’re in their company. Note
that only about 10% of the population suffers from diagnosable personality disorders in total
and the rate for each disorder below is in parentheses following its name.

Bear in mind that personality disorders are long-lasting and fairly entrenched behavioral
patterns. In fact, the individuals who are displaying the behaviors congruent with most
personality disorders are not even aware that their behaviors are disordered. This means
that once the initial attraction wears off and the odd or eccentric behavioral patterns wear
thin, there is seldom much hope of seeing lasting change. Therapy and
psychopharmacological treatments can reduce or manage symptoms, but the person who is
diagnosed with one of the following 10 disorders is unlikely to be able to manage the
symptoms on their own for the long haul.

1. Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder (7.9%)

Individuals who suffer from the tendency to be a “little OCD” are nothing compared to those
individuals who are diagnosed with Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder. While the
signs are distinct from those of Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD), an individual with
OCPD may have a difficult time functioning in daily life due to an obsessive preoccupation
with rules and orderliness.

Ask Yourself: Is this person’s endearing habits of making sure the cat is fed and the
bedroom door locked amusing quirks or are these symptoms of something more
debilitating? Does this person’s need to cut his meat into exactly seven pieces make you
giggle or cringe when it’s happening at every meal no matter where you’re dining? Is
the compulsive behaviorgetting in the way of daily life and keeping this person from enjoying
the normal unpredictability and spontaneity of living?

2. Narcissistic Personality Disorder (6.2%)

The true narcissist is much different than the individual who just happens to have high self-
esteem. Narcissists are motivated by the desire to use a heavy hand to control a person’s
response to them, but having a high sense of self-esteem doesn’t typically reflect a need to
control others, but rather self-satisfaction. Narcissists are incapable of much empathy and
typically use their limited people skills in ways that serve them in their bids for attention and
praise.

Ask Yourself: Does this person wear you down with her need for adoration? Do you feel that
when she does something thoughtful for you that it’s a way to increase your appreciation or
indebtedness to her?

3. Borderline Personality Disorder (5.9%)

These individuals are considered “borderline” due to the lack of clear ego boundaries that
they possess. They may become overly invested in a relationship and respond to any hint of
trouble between themselves and a partner in a manner out of proportion to the situation.
Their instability extends to emotional responses, personal relationships, and tendencies
towards suicidal behaviors. They love you more than anyone else until you miss a step and
you’re cast into the role of the enemy before you know it.

Ask Yourself: Do I feel as if the world is spinning out of control when she gets angry? Do I
feel afraid to disagree or correct her if she’s wrong?

4. Paranoid Personality Disorder (4.4%)

These individuals aren’t just careful about home security, they are obsessed with the
suspicion that others are intentionally trying to do them harm. These individuals may behave
quite oddly and their day-to-day lives can become increasingly constrained by their fears.
They may confide their fears to you conspiratorially and while you might be flattered by
being cast as the “good guy,” their fears may be delusions and they may need more than
simple empathy or support.

Ask Yourself: Do the behaviors of this person seem normal compared to other people who
have dealt with the kinds of things this person fears? Does this person seem unable to trust
anyone at all or do they truly believe that even their families or friends are “out to get them”?

5. Schizotypal Personality Disorder (3.9%)

These individuals also are likely to behave in ways that are far from the norm of typically
interpersonal attraction. They may have odd beliefs about the world around them and be
highly resistant to any kind of interpersonal relationship forays from others.

Ask Yourself: Does this person seem to be living in a world of their own and do they have
proper care?

6. Antisocial Personality Disorder (3.6%)

Individuals with this disorder exhibit behaviors that reflect a disregard for the feelings or
personhood of others. They may engage in intentional deception, impulsive action, and
unlawful behaviors. Unfortunately, they may have the skills necessary to present as
potentially attractive partners, but are only using the façade to con their prey into trusting
them enough that they can take advantage. There’s little empathy among this group and
their primary motivation is typically getting what they want.

Ask Yourself: Does this person seem unusually disinterested in intimacy? Does this person
seem to lack a sense of morality or honesty? Does this person seem not to care about how
her actions affect others?

7. Schizoid Personality Disorder (3.1%)

These individuals are unlikely to find themselves in any type of close relationship with
others. There is a sense of preoccupation with their own internal worlds and they are unlikely
to show much emotional expression or interpersonal interactions at all.

Ask Yourself: Does this person seem to be unaware of the world or the people around him
and does this person have proper care?

8. Avoidant Personality Disorder (2.4%)

Individuals with this disorder have a very difficult time forming relationships, including with
their families, peers, or potential romantic partners. Their fearof being rejected is so strong
that they protect themselves by avoiding involvement or interactions of any depth with
others.

Ask Yourself: Does this person seem to find reasons to avoid being with me? Does this
person have any significant relationships in his life? Friends? Family? Former romantic
partners?
9. Histrionic Personality Disorder (1.8%)

While the narcissistic person loves attention and tries hard to convince those around him that
he’s as wonderful as he believes himself to be, the person diagnosed with histrionic
personality disorder is desperate to get attention in whatever way she must. She might be the
“life of the party” until her need for attention keeps her antics getting more and more
explosive or excessive. Whether it’s physical appearance or story-telling or super-sized
emotional displays, this person does what she can to make sure everyone knows what she
is feeling or needing at that moment in time.

Ask Yourself: Do I find myself growing tired of having to constantly validate this person?
Does the attention-seeking behavior get in the way of real one-on-one communication?
Does she have a need for attention that one person could never satisfy?

10. Dependent Personality Disorder (.5%)

While we all should enjoy being interdependent with other people, such as friends,
colleagues, or romantic partners, the person who suffers from Dependent Personality
Disorder is overly needy, excessively clingy, and needs reassurance from her significant
others in order to make decisions about her own life. These individuals can wear down the
good nature of the kindest soul and in primary relationships, their dependence may lead to
behaviors that drive away their partners.

Ask Yourself: Does this person make me feel needed or overwhelm me with his neediness?
When we’re together, is our relationship more likely to make us feel like “the whole is more
than the sum of the parts” or does he make me feel that he’s not “whole” without me?

All of us are attracted to different people for different reasons, but if someone's behavior
seems a little "too" different, listen to your instincts. Make sure that you're aware of the risks
and the necessary costs before letting yourself start believing that you can change someone
to suit your needs; disappointment is likely what you'll find instead of the long-
term happiness you might be seeking.