Christian C.

Cagulada Creative Writing

ACA- Actg. 11.1 October 12, 2018

Enhancing Sexual Intimacy through Audit Planning Activities

Admit it or not, we are all suckers for love stories. We fantasize. We seek every

nooks and crannies just to keep up our relationships just like what we read in novels or

what we see in movies. Pyramus and Thisbe's love, despite being separated by a wall,

sprang even just by communicating through nods and signs . But that does not apply to

reality. Who in the right mind would love someone through nods and signs? We have to

look for something just to make our relationship blaze like a scorching sun .

One of the most crucial fuels that we need to spice up our relationship and keep it

moving forward is romance. Savoring romance improves our relationship with our loved

ones, making it more exciting and more worthwhile. However, there are times when we

forget the essence of romance in our relationship due to the commitments and diversions

we have in our busy lives. Hence, we never find the time to be romantic and our desire

and adoration for one another slowly fades, making our relationship lost its spark.

There are various means to express our romance to our partners . Some would

express it emotionally, or physically or even both. One of the ways to express our

romance is through sex. Sexual intimacy is considered integral in every couple’s

relationship. However, there are some couples who found themselves in dilemma when

talking about their lapses and needs in their sex life marking it as one of the most

contentious subject matters that some couple spends years trying to figure out just how

it is meant to work.
 The introduction of the internet in our generation makes it possible to find sex

everywhere today. Suddenly, we, students were exposed to it through pornography which

can be found on phones, computers, social media sites and even in books, magazines,

TV and radio. Although the nature of sexual behavior in our relationship has undergone

changes due to evolving standards and media pressure , still, it remains a contentious

subject matter.

Being a contentious subject matter, it seems evading sex is the only excuse some

couples can make because they simply do not know how. As a matter of fact, there are

no secrets to sex. Most of the time, everything we need to know is right under our noses.

We just need to properly plan the course of actions to achieve the desired satisfaction the

same way the auditors want their audit to be executed. Auditor needs adequate planning

to ensure that appropriate attention is devoted to important areas of the audit , potential

problems are promptly identified, and the work is completed expeditiously. They

promulgate major audit planning activities which can also be applied to enhance the

sexual intimacy with our partner.

Obtaining an understanding of the client and its environment

In auditing, prior to the actual audit or the fieldwork, an auditor should obtain an

understanding of the client and its environment . It enables the auditor in assessing risk

and identifying problems and in planning and performing the audit effectively and
efficiently. This can be achieved through numerous ways such as proper communication

and discussion with the client.

To apply this in love making scenario, we need to treat our partner as our client .

Similar to audit, proper communication should be conducted to achieve the sexual

satisfaction. We do not possess the ability to read minds to know what our partner likes

unless they communicate this to us.

In order to have fulfilling sexual experiences, it is important to communicate.

Communication is a two-way street that embraces sending and receiving messages. The

clear communicator must therefore learn to also be a good listener. We need to listen to

our partner sincerely and talk about our innermost feelings honestly. It might seem

awkward or difficult, but there are simple steps we can take to communicate effectively

to obtain an understanding on how to arrive at the desired satisfaction . Also, discussing

our expectations, concerns, sexual desires, sexual pleasure and sexual boundaries is a

key to great sex. In this way, it can avert misunderstanding, relieve resentments and

frustrations, and increase general and sexual satisfaction within the relationship. Also,

potential problems and discomfort can be identified and addressed same as the objective

of the first audit planning activity.

Taking into account our partner’s needs and boundaries and addressing this

properly allows us to fulfill our expected plans in sex. Open communication about it could

even provide certain benefits to our relationship. According to Montesi, Fauber, Gordon,
& Heimberg (2010), “good communication and a satisfying sexual relationship are two

important components of heterosexual couples’ overall relationship satisfaction .

Additionally, the two are directly related—sexual satisfaction hinges in part on effective

communication, and communication problems are associated with sexual dysfunction

and/or dissatisfaction.”

Indeed, obtaining an understanding with our partner’s sexual desires , wants and

boundaries through proper communication is an important key in achieving the desired

sexual satisfaction. Though some couples consider sexual communication as the hardest

thing to do, surely, the benefits of it will make them easier for them to have a satisfying

sex life.

Determining the need for experts

In auditing, auditors are expected to be experts in accounting and auditing matters,

but they are not reasonably expected to be experts in any other field . Therefore, in

performing the audit works the auditor needs the assistance from an expert to assist the

auditor in obtaining sufficient appropriate audit evidence in the form of reports, opinions,

valuations and statements of an expert.

Relating this to the subject matter, there are some couples who consider sex as a

taboo subject and only discussed behind closed doors. They barely talk about their sexual

problems over dinner conversations among friends or family and compel themselves to
figure it out on their own because they are embarrassed. The problem is that we are not

experts of this matter. We need experts or professionals for this.

Every relationship has its ups and downs, and it is rare for couples not to encounter

into a few bumps in the road. One of these bumps is sexual dysfunction. Sexual

dysfunction refers to a problem occurring during any phase of the sexual response cycle

that prevents the individual or couple from experiencing satisfaction from the sexual

activity (Phillips, 2000).

Sexual problems like sexual dysfunctions are nearly common to every couple. A

study shows that 43 percent of women and 31 percent of men reportedly suffer from it

(Phillips, 2000); yet many couple are still hesitant to discuss it. This can be proven in a

research conducted by Moreira, et al. (2005), which states that, “Although almost half of

27,500 sexually active respondents had experienced at least one sexual problem , less

than 19% of them (18.0% of men and 18.8% of women) had attempted to seek medical

help for their problem(s)”.

Since we are already in an era where plenty of treatment options are available , it

is important to consider the use of an expert in tackling this problem. Should

communication alone cannot be a solution in enhancing sexual intimacy, then it is the

time that we need to opt for the work of a psychiatrist, psychologist, sexual therapist or

personal healthcare provider; hence, applying the second audit planning activity.
Establishing Materiality and Assessing Risk

Based on understanding of the client and its environment , the auditor establishes

he preliminary judgment about materiality and preliminary assessment of inherent and

control risk.

In relevance to the subject matter, we could also establish materiality and assess

the risks after communicating with our partner and obtaining an understanding of their

fancies, interests and limitations. We could use the knowledge that we obtained in

assessing the potential set of consequences that may come to light and in deciding on

the material things that should be considered to enhance sexual intimacy.

Establishing materiality in audit can be compared to setting up the important things

that should be considered before engaging into sex. We need to highly recognize the

circumstance and actions that can affect the sexual satisfaction such as the gender of the

partner, kind of relationship, presence and type of contraception and sexually transmitted

infection prevention methods we’ll use. Moreover, recognizing the possible risks could

exist is great step in enhancing sexual satisfaction. The act of it can prepare us for

alternative procedures if potential risks could actually happen. Since we already know the

things that matter after the communication or our prior intimate experience with our

partner, we can determine and neglect those do not affect materially in achieving the

desired satisfaction. We just need to trust our gut instincts and do what feels right .

Assessing the possibility of noncompliance

 Noncompliance in auditing refers to acts of omission or commission by the entity

being audited, either intentional or unintentional, which are contrary to the prevailing laws

of regulation. The auditor, when planning the audit, needs to assess this for it may give

rise to business risks that have a fundamental effect on the operations of the entity, or on

its ability to continue as a going concern.

As regard to enhancing intimacy with our partner, we need to consider the

possibility of nonconsensual sex- the possibility that our partner or we, ourselves is not

being compliant in terms of consent. Same as in the noncompliance of an entity to the

prevailing laws of regulation, nonconsensual sex could bring out severe negative

consequences and destroy our relationship’s ability to continue as a going concern.

Consent is when we agree to or give permission to another person to do

something. It means agreeing to an action based on our knowledge of what that action

involves, its probable consequences and having the option of saying no . When it comes

to sex in our relationship, consent is really important. It's important to remember that we

have a responsibility to make sure that we together with our partner feel safe and

comfortable every step along the way.

In auditing, noncompliance with the applicable laws can cause a huge impact to the

operations of the client. Also, in sex, complying for consent is not only a sign of respect,

it is required by law and any sexual activity that is forced or done without consent is not

sex – it is sexual assault. It is an offense and can lead to serious legal problems and it is
not just a crime, it can create emotional consequences to your partner and it can last a

lifetime.

As the length of an intimate relationship grows, the sexual relationship also

changes. We tend to be more comfortable with our partner’s sexual likes and dislikes .

We sometimes forget the importance of consent. This can be supported by Shotland and

Goodstein’s (1992) theory of sexual activity. They suggest that once sexual relations have

been established, there are expectations on the part of both men and women that those

patterns will continue. Their research found that men and women are more likely to

perceive a resisting woman as obligated to have sex, if the couple has had sexual

intercourse 10 times before versus once or never before the event (Shotland & Goodstein,

1992).

In a healthy relationship, it’s important to discuss and respect our boundaries on

the regular to enhance sexual intimacy. It’s not okay to assume that once our partner

consents to an activity, it means they are consenting to it anytime in the future as well .

Whether it’s the first time or the hundredth time, nobody is ever obligated to consent to

something, even if we’ve done it in the past. We can decide to stop an activity at any

time, even if we agreed to it earlier. Above all, we have a right to our own body and to

feel comfortable with how we use it.

Identifying related parties and performing preliminary analytical procedures

Auditors are required to ask management about the identity of related parties and

transactions when planning the audit, they are also required to remain alert for related

party information that management has not previously identified or disclosed. To be able

to do this, auditors should understand the business, what it does, the nature of

transactions, with whom it trades and its normal terms of trade . Auditors should take

account of the company’s previous history of related party transactions and consider

whether the business is likely to have related party relationships and transactions.

To associate this in the topic, related parties are important to consider in achieving

the desired sexual intimacy. Just like some entity’s transaction with related parties,

sometimes the transactions with the related parties of our partner are not conducted at

arm’s length. These parties are used to cover up fraudulent activities and this is where

the potential problems begin that we need to carefully identify.

There are times when our partner cannot give sexual satisfaction and we wonder

why. Several possibilities could be inferred, it could be that they are tired, work is

stressing them out or they are not just horny. If we can’t really find the real possibility why

our partner cannot satisfy us in bed, we need to possess a questioning mind and consider

the fact that our partner is now interested in another party.

There are many forms of cheating. One of the most common forms of cheating is

physical cheating. It is the act of being sexually intimate with someone other than our
spouse or significant other and such act can have a profound effect on a couple’s sex life.

However, before concluding that our partner is having an unusual affair, we might as well

investigate the situation carefully.

Auditors can determine whether management has disclosed related party

relationships and transactions by considering their prior experience , knowledge and

understanding of the client’s business and operations, and by discussions with others in

the firm who may have provided non-audit services. With respect to the topic, discussing

this to our partner is the most proper thing to do. Our first discussion with our partner

about this issue may not go very well. If we can see that our partner is willing to talk and

work with us in handling this issue, let us just be patient and do not let our emotions

overpower our rational thinking. Analytical procedures could also be a great help. We

cannot simply jump into conclusions if we have not yet gathered sufficient appropriate

evidence because it can jeopardize a valuable relationship.

Analytical procedures in auditing involves the evaluation of plausible relationships

among both financial and non-financial data. With regard to identification of related parties

and assessing if our partner is cheating, Thomas Martin the president of Martin

Investigative Services in Newport Beach, California, wrote the book Seeing Life through

Private Eyes, where he lists the 20 most telling clues that we could evaluate that may

indicate infidelity. According to Martin, spotting one or two of the signs isn't a reason to

worry. However, if we spot four or more, it is practically an admission of our partner's

guilt. The following are the most important signs we should consider: changing habits ,

leaving the house early and returning late, business trips, holiday or family event

absences, excessive overtime, unexplained spending, secret accounts (instagram,

email), hidden credit card bills, extra grooming, scent of someone else (typical lipstick on

the collar), buying gifts we haven't seen , unexplained items - condoms in the car are a

giveaway, joining a gym, missed calls from an unknown number, coded or secretive text

messages, less sex, evasiveness or defensiveness, obvious lies, prickliness or short

tempe and hates surprise visits (Martin, 2017).

Sex can be a reflection of what's going on emotionally in a relationship, and we

use it to express resentment, jealousy, or neglect. When it comes to conversations about

possible unusual affairs, most of us consider it as a very delicate, complex issue, and we

are often very sensitive about it. We need to talk about it sooner rather than late.

However, whatever twists and turns the conversation takes, it's important to not sound

accusatory. We need to come off as curious, respectful and open-minded to maintain the

value of the relationship and analyze properly the possible reasons why our partner

cannot intimately satisfy us.

Development of the overall audit strategy and detailed audit plan and preparation

of preliminary audit programs

Based on the information accumulated from the previous steps, the auditor develops

overall audit strategy and converts the strategy to a more detailed plan . After that, the
auditor then prepares the preliminary audit programs which contain the procedures to be

performed for each account or class of transactions. This can be applied in enhancing

sexual intimacy in a way that after obtaining and assessing the desires , wants and

boundaries of our partner, we can now make an overall strategy and plan to address the

subject matter. It is nice to put in a little extra effort every once in a while and incorporate

some of the unique elements in our relationship. It makes our partner feel special and

desired.

Indeed, sex can elevate the relationship’s intimacy and it is human’s nature to aim

for the best just to alleviate couple’s misunderstandings. Like any other things, auditing

process to an organization and sexual intimacy to a relationship are something to be

prepared for. When we are ready for something, we tend to have the best possible

outcome we desire for.

There are a lot of concepts and principles that may be related to enhancing sexual

intimacy in a relationship and using audit planning activities on this matter is something

out-of-the-box, but surely applicable. Ergo, auditing planning activities will help us to

avoid misunderstanding with our partners. It will be vital for us to ensure potential

problems will be promptly identified. Finally, it will help us to carry out our responsibility

smoothly and in a well-define manner.

References
Montesi, J. L., Fauber, R. L., Gordon, E. A., & Heimberg, R. G. (2010). The specific
importance of communicating about sex to couples' sexual and overall
relationship satisfaction. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 592-609.
Shotland, R. L., & Goodstein, L. B. (1992). Sexual precedence reduces the perceived
legitimacy of sexual refusal: An examination of attributions concerning date rape
and consensual sex. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 756-764.
Martin, T. G. (2017). Seeing Life Through Private Eyes: Secret's from America's Top
Investigator to Living Safer, Smarter, and Saner. Rowman & Littlefield
Publishers.
Moreira , E., Brock, G., Glasser, D., Nicolosi, A., Laumann, E., Paik, A., . . . Gingell , C.
(2005). Help-seeking behaviour for sexual problems: the global study of sexual
attitudes and behaviors. 6-16.
Phillips, N. A. (2000). Female Sexual Dysfunction: Evaluation and Treatment. American
Family Physician, 127-136.