Human Lie

Detection and
Body Language 101
Your Guide to Reading
People’s Nonverbal
Behavior
By Vanessa Van
Edwards
Please visit the ScienceofPeople.org for free
video and article guides in addition to this
book.
© 2013 Vanessa Van Edwards. All rights reserved. ISBN
978-1482040234
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Table of Contents

Introduction: Who Is This Book For? The Good

News:
Do You Really Want to Know?
A Word of Caution
What to Expect
About Me:

Chapter 1: Baselining
How to Baseline:
The Importance of Rapport

Chapter 2: Microexpressions and the

Face
Microexpressions: Eyes More About Head Behavior
A Lying Face

Chapter 3: Body Language

Feet
Legs
Torso Arm Behavior
Hand Behavior Body Proxemics
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Chapter 4: Vocal Displays, Voice Tone

and Language Patterns Verbal Clues to De-
ception Voice Tone and Bonding

Chapter 5: Clues to Behavior Most Com-

mon Lying Gestures How We React to Our Own
Lies
Meanings of Other Everyday Gestures
How to Get Someone to Tell You More:
How to Get Someone to Confess:

Chapter 6: Your Nonverbal Behavior

Your Nonverbal Behavior

Why You Shouldn’t Lie
How to Make A Great First Impression

Chapter 7: Special Areas

Interactions Between Men and Women: Dating, Ro-
mance and Love
Business Body Language and Non-
verbal Behavior
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Conclusion and Other Resources:

Appendix 1: Interview Tips
Appendix 2: Microexpressions

Appendix 3: Lance Armstrong

1. The Confession:
2. Why Now?
3. Doping Scheme
4. Anger and Holding Back
5. Suing Shame
6. Contempt At Recklessness

Appendix 4: Colors
Appendix 5: The Best Websites on Human
Lie Detection Citations
Notes:

Introduction:
Have you ever thought someone was telling
you a lie? Your intuition was probably
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right—on average people tell two to three lies

in a ten-minute conversation.

Even more frightening, 91% of people lie reg-

ularly at home and work. But we can detect
these lies only about half of the time—no bet-
ter than a coin toss.

Learning how to decode and interpret non-

verbal behavior such as facial expressions,
gestures, physical movements and vocal tone
is an integral part of communication. As
much as 93% of interpersonal communica-
tion is nonverbal, yet we often base all of our
interactions on verbal content alone.

By using the latest scientific techniques sum-

marized in this book, you will no longer
doubt yourself or wonder helplessly if the
person you are with is trying to deceive you.

Research has shown you can signific-

antly improve your lie spotting and
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people reading ability by learning how

to read nonverbal behavior.

All of the tips, cues and clues in this book are

based on academic research. For a full list of
my sources, you can see my citation section.

Who Is This Book For?

Whether you are a teacher, businessman, po-

lice officer, husband, gardener or mother,
this book is for you. If you have ever interac-
ted with another person, this book can
change the way you communicate with
others.

Interesting Fact: Extroverts lie more

than introverts.
Everyone should know more than 82% of lies
go undetected.
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Businesses should know corporate fraud

cost us $997 billion in the United States in
2011, which is 7% of total annual revenue.

Parents should know college students lie to

their moms one in every five interactions.
Human resource professionals and en-
trepreneurs should know a third of all re-
sumes contain false information.
Managers should know one in five employ-
ees say they are aware of fraud in their
workplace.
Women should know men typically lie more
often than females.
The Good News:
Lying is learned, so we can unlearn it.

To test this fact, researchers left three year-

olds in a room and told them not to peek at a
concealed toy across the room. 90% of the
children looked and when asked, 38% admit-
ted that they broke the rules.
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When researchers did the same experiment

with five yearolds none of them admitted
they broke the rules after peeking at the for-
bidden toy. Older children had learned, even
at the young age of five, that they could get in
trouble for telling the truth and decided to lie
instead.

Lie spotting is about getting back to truth.

This book is not about teaching you to pick
people’s behavior apart or point fingers at li-
ars. It is about arming you with scientific
principles to help you have more honest in-
teractions, better communication and more
trustworthy relationships.

Interesting Fact: Researchers found

that combining deception detecting
techniques with background checks can re-
veal 32% more cases of past job dismissals,
60% more criminal
convictions and 82% more cases of alcohol
abuse during work hours.
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Our brain is much more adept at spotting

lies than we realize. When our brain picks up
on a lie subconsciously we often have what
we call, an intuition, that something is
wrong, but we are not sure what. The tools in
this book will help you bring that subcon-
scious realization forward so you know ex-
actly what you are seeing.

In one study, researchers had participants

view 30 seconds of a mute video where a new
professor was talking to his students. Just
after that 30 second silent clip, the parti-
cipants were able to correctly predict how
well the teachers would do in their global
evaluations at the end of the semester—just
from a 30 second clip!

Even when the researchers shortened the

clip to two seconds, participants were still
able to predict how the teacher would do in
their evaluations at the end of the semester.
Our brains are incredibly accurate.
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Some people, nicknamed truth wizards, are

able to naturally spot detection with incred-
ible accuracy. Research from University of
California found that 20 to 30% of these
truth wizards had traumatic childhoods in-
volving alcohol, an unstable home life, sexu-
al, or emotional or physical abuse.

Researchers in this study hypothesized that

it was very important for these children to be
able to read the adults around them in the
unstable situations because their safety, and
sometimes their life, depended on it.

Our brains develop the ability to spot lies

and hidden emotions as a way of self-protec-
tion. So, we are working with tools that our
brain already knows, we just have to bring
them forward.

Do You Really Want to Know?

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When I tell people I am a behavioral invest-

igator and write about human behavi-
or—with an emphasis on human lie detec-
tion, there is a question I always get:

Is human lie detection a blessing or a curse?

It is a blessing to know when people are lying

to you, but can feel like a curse when
someone you thought you could trust turns
out to be dishonest. In the end, I would al-
ways rather know the hard truth than be ig-
norantly blissful. This might not be the case
for everyone.
Before diving into this book, you have to ask
yourself: Are you prepared to see the
hidden emotions in the people around
you?

You might not always like the emotions or

lies you see.
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Interesting Fact: Since 1991, lifetime

infidelity among men over aged 60
has doubled. Among women it has
tripled.

A Word of Caution

The purpose of this book is not to turn you

into a suspicious person. Quite the opposite,
by arming yourself with the right tools, you
can feel more confident to relax around
people and trust that you know lies when you
see them instead of being suspicious of
everyone and every action happening around
you.

In fact, being overly suspicious will not serve

you well. Research shows that people who
score higher on measures of trust also spot
lies better. That means it is better to be trust-
ing and open-minded because suspicious
people don’t catch liars and falsely accuse
more often.
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Interesting Fact: 80% of lies go

undetected.
What to Expect

Learning to decode human behavior will

completely change the way you interact and
listen to others. If you choose to use the prin-
ciples in this book you will start to notice nu-
ances to communication and aspects of
people you did not see before.

True emotions that you had missed will now

seem painfully obvious. It will be like watch-
ing people around you in High Definition.
Facial expressions you never noticed will be-
come clear, body language red flags will
jump to your attention and voice tone dis-
crepancies will sound like sirens in your
head.

You have to be ready for these changes. And

be ready to be surprised. If you decide to
dive deep into the world of body language
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sleuthing, people hacking and lie spotting

then this book is your step-by-step guide.

The tips in this book are based on the latest

scientifically backed research on deception
detection and nonverbal behavior.

I will start with the principle of base lining,

which is the first step to reading and decod-
ing others. Chapter 2 is all about under-
standing the face—this is where we first look
during person-to-person interactions and
therefore a great place to start.

In Chapter 3, I will go through different

types of body language clues before review-
ing voice tone and verbal clues to deceit in
Chapter 4.

In Chapter 5, I will explain the art of lie de-

tection through body language red flags and
clusters of body language leaks. In Chapter
6, I take a break from observing other
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people’s Nonverbal behavior and help read-

ers think about their own body language
clues.

I will provide special nonverbal behavior pat-

terns for entrepreneurs, daters, speakers and
human resource professionals in Chapter 7.

Interesting Fact: Adults lie in about

one in five social interactions. College
students lie in one in three social
interactions.

About Me:

I have always been fascinated by people and

what drives their behavior. As a behavioral
investigator and author I am a research
junkie. I love curating the latest scientific
findings and translating them into bite-sized
science that can be used in every day life.
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In my columns for Forbes, CNN and the

Huffington Post I often apply groundbreak-
ing studies to modern day business and so-
cial trends.

My website, ScienceOfPeople.org has an

in depth selection of free articles, videos and
tutorials for my readers and fellow body lan-
guage detectives. I have a number of ebooks
specifically written for the needs of entre-
preneurs, human resource managers, actors,
parents, sales teams, doctors and other busi-
ness professionals.

Chapter 1: Baselining
The first and most important step to human
lie detection is baselining.

A baseline is how someone acts when

they are under normal, non-
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threatening conditions. It is how

someone looks when they are telling
the truth.

The truth needs to represent fact or reality. A

lie is when someone makes a false statement
with the intent to deceive. Before we can pin-
point lies, we must be able to recognize
truth.

Interesting Fact: About 20 % of men

and 15% of women under the age of 35
have cheated on their partner. It is
even higher for people aged 18 to 25,
with 30% of partners having cheated.

When you want to better read a person’s

emotions or spot when they lie, you will need
to find their baseline, or notice how they
look, sound, act and behave when they are
telling the truth. For this book we will call
the person you are trying to read “the
subject.”
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How to Baseline:

Step One: Neutral Topics, Neutral Context In

order to see how your subject behaves when
being honest you want to discuss neutral
topics. This is typically very easy when you
just meet someone at a party, meeting or job
interview.

Start with a few non-threatening questions

your subject would have no reason to lie
about, like the weather, their name or their
plans for the weekend. Anything that quali-
fies as small talk is usually safe.

Step Two: Look for Physical Behavior

While talking to the subject about neutral

topics, take note of their physical behavior
and characteristics. Here are the areas to
which you should pay attention:

-How do they hold their body?

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-What is their posture like?

-Do they fidget?
-What are their hand gestures?
-Are their legs crossed? How are they sitting?
-Do they blink a lot or have a nervous tick?
-What are their facial expressions?
Step Three: Listen for Verbal Behavior
You also can listen for baseline behavior. Ask
yourself the following questions:
-Is their voice high or low?
-Do they laugh easily and what does it sound
like?
-Do they clear their throat or cough?
-Do they naturally use a lot of ‘uhs’ or ‘ums’?
Step Four: How Do They Express?

If possible, it is very helpful to see how

someone looks when they are excited. After
asking a few neutral questions, I will often
ask my subject about their passions or hob-
bies. In this way, you can see how they ex-
press themselves when they are telling the
truth.
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For example a job interviewer might notice

someone’s Dallas Cowboys key chain and ask
if they are a fan. As the subject talks about
her favorite team, her face might light up
and her hands might become animated and
expressive. Later the interviewer could pay
attention to how the subject describes a fa-
vorite work project and see if the behavior is
similar.

Interesting Fact: 66% to 80% percent

of college students admit to having
cheated at some point in their
schooling.

Step Five: Dig Deeper

After some easy banter, you should have a

feeling for how the person acts, sounds and
behaves when they tell the truth. Now you
are ready to ask some deeper ques-
tions—whether
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those are the tough questions in an inter-

view, the important questions on a date or
the curious question of a parent.

The following chapters will explain in more

detail what else to look for once you have
found someone’s baseline.
Remember, the more open-ended the
question, the more material you will
have to analyze.

For example it is better to ask, “What are you

doing this weekend?” which usually requires
a more than one word answer. Instead of
“Are you going to the game this weekend?”

Step Six: Clusters and Red Flags

There is no behavioral smoking gun that

means a subject is lying. Even an obvious dif-
ference in behavior from the baseline is not
enough to confirm someone is lying by itself.
There are clues however.
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Every time a subject deviates from the

baseline constitutes a ‘red flag’ --- or
something of which you should be aware.
Red flags also appear when you spot a hid-
den emotion (which you will learn in the fol-
lowing chapters).

My rule of thumb is to take notice when I

spot three red flags in one response. If you
see a cluster of odd behaviors or changes in
baselines you know you have stumbled upon
a touchy topic or a lie—either one warrants
further investigation later in the
conversation.

Optional: Get a Nervous Baseline One of the

biggest confusions lie spotters face is separ-
ating lies from nerves. This is why the con-
text of the situation is very important.

If a subject is on a job interview you might

assume they are probably nervous, even
when they are answering neutral questions.
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If you ask someone a tough or sensitive ques-

tion, they might be nervous because the sub-
ject is difficult for them to discuss -- even if
they are telling the truth.

If you are trying to decode a subject when

discussing difficult topics or in a tense situ-
ation, you need to be sure to get their
‘nervous baseline.’ This is how the subject
looks when they are nervous, but still telling
the truth.

This is not difficult and often happens natur-

ally. In a job interview for example, the per-
son is likely already nervous during the first
few neutral questions. In a social situation
you can also find out how someone acts
when they are nervous while telling the truth
by bringing up sad or sensitive topics in the
news.

You will often see changes in the face and

body when these topics come up that give
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you clues and a baseline to their tense or

nervous body displays.

Nervous baselining is important in high-

pressure situations because these are the
times when people often lie. Studies show
that the larger the potential incentive, the
more likely people are to lie and the more
they expect others to lie.

For example, many people who lie during ne-

gotiations for what they believe is a big stake
item report feeling little or no guilt.
Here is an example of how nervous baselines
work. Let’s say you would like to be able to
better read your colleague, Wyatt, at the
office:

Step One:

During a coffee break one day in the break

room you ask Wyatt a few neutral questions
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about his plans for the weekend or what he is

doing for lunch.

Step Two:

You notice Wyatt loosely holds his torso and

leans back against the break room wall. He
also nods his head a lot. These are his calm
baseline behaviors. You notice he uses a me-
dium voice tone and clears his throat every
so often.

Step Three:

You ask Wyatt what he thinks about the new

iPhone release—knowing he loves Apple
products. You watch him step away from the
wall and talk animatedly about waiting in
line for hours outside the store. His voice
gets louder and a few people turn to chuckle
at his excitement. This is how he looks when
he is excited or passionate.
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Step Four: Nervous Baseline

You decide to also get a nervous baseline be-

cause the issue you would like to bring up is
a bit sensitive. You ask Wyatt what he thinks
about Ted getting fired last week for stealing
from the company. This causes him to lean
towards you and cross his arms over his body
in a stiff way.

He drops his voice tone, but continues to nod

and clear his throat as he had during the
neutral questions. It seems a stiff upper body
is what he shows when talking about tense
topics, but everything else is the same as his
normal baseline behavior.

Step Five:

Now you get to dig a little deeper into the

subject about which you are most curious.
You ask Wyatt about the big project last
month and his contribution on the report.
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You have been suspicious he did not do as

much as he claims. Sure enough, he stiffens
his upper body— mimicking his nervous
baseline response. So clearly, this is not a
topic he is comfortable with.

Step Six:

This is red flag number one, because an hon-

est person would not be uncomfortable talk-
ing about the big project if they had nothing
to hide.

Wyatt also begins to vigorously clear his

throat, far more frequently than when he was
nervous and when he was calm. This is most
likely his ‘tell’ as we say in poker. This is red
flag number two.

As you will learn in the chapter on clusters, I

like to look for at least three red flags before
making a prediction about someone’s
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deception. He then begins to scratch the

back of his neck.

In the body language chapter you will learn

that this is a self-soothing gesture and is of-
ten shown by liars when they are trying to
keep themselves calm. This is red flag num-
ber three and almost certainly means he is
concealing something about his activity with
the big project.

This is just one example of how baselining

can work in an everyday interaction. In the
following chapters you will become more ad-
ept looking for tells in the face, in the body
and with vocal tone. Baselining will also help
you find your three red flags.

Baselining can be done very quickly with a

single question, or in depth with longer in-
terviews, and will get easier with practice.
Eventually you will not even have to think
about baselining, it will become second
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nature to you in the beginning of

interactions.

The Importance of Rapport

Baselining not only helps you read your sub-

ject, but it also lets your subject know you
are paying attention to them. This is a great
rapport builder.

When you are paying close attention to

someone, they feel you are more invested
and interested in them—which you are! This
breeds loyalty and strong relationships.

The importance of building rapport cannot

be understated. People tend to tell more lies
in situations where they feel uncomfortable
or disconnected.
If they have a connection to you and think
you are trustworthy they will want to help
you.
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Chapter 2: Microexpressions
and the Face
Most of us look at our conversation partner’s
face far more than any other part of the
body. The face is a veritable map of human
emotions—if you know how to read it.

Human emotions are shown primarily in the

face, whereas the body merely shows how
one is coping with the emotion. Because of
this, the face is the best place to look for lies
and hidden emotions.

Interesting Fact: Nine out of ten job

applicants overemphasize or com-
pletely make up their positive traits.

Our brains also pay a lot of attention to the

face and make incredibly quick—and accur-
ate snap judgments just by looking at
someone’s face. In one study, researchers
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had participants look at pictures of Chief Ex-

ecutive Officers (CEOs) while their brain
activity was being monitored.

Certain faces caused people’s amygdala’s to

light up—the area of the brain where fear is
processed. When asked about these faces,
participants said they were most likely better
leaders. Subconsciously we believe the
people who cause us to feel afraid, are likely
more powerful and would therefore make
better leaders!

The most interesting part of the experi-

ment—the ones who caused the most fear
and participants thought were the best lead-
ers also made the most profits. Their brain
was right!

Participants were able to accurately predict

leadership abilities and profits just by look-
ing at someone’s face. So, now that we know
 33/243

the face is important, what do you have to

know?

Microexpressions:

Unlike our words, our facial expressions are

very hard to control because they are based
on emotions. They can be controlled if we
consciously think about them, but are almost
impossible to control all the time, especially
when we feel an intense emotion come on
quickly.

A microexpression is a very brief, in-

voluntary facial expression displayed
on the face of humans according to the
emotions being experienced.

They often occur as fast as 1/15 to 1/25 of a

second. Prolonged facial expressions can be
a bit easier to fake, but it is exceedingly diffi-
cult to fake a microexpression.
 34/243

Dr. Paul Ekman, whom you could say is the

father of the field of microexpressions, dis-
covered over 10,000 facial expressions. Crit-
ically he has confirmed seven universal ex-
pressions with specific meanings no matter
the subject’s age, sex, or culture.

These universal expressions are: disgust, an-

ger, fear, sadness, happiness, surprise, and
contempt. Dr. Ekman realized everyone from
remote tribes in Papa New Guinea to Japan-
ese businessmen to American teenagers
make these seven same facial expressions
while experiencing corresponding emotions.
He also found congenitally blind individu-
als—those blind since birth--also make the
same expressions even though they have
never seen other people’s faces.

Learning to read the seven microexpressions

is incredibly helpful in understanding the
people in our lives and their thoughts.
 35/243

Below, I describe each of the seven emotions.

I highly encourage you to practice the ex-
pressions in the mirror so you can experi-
ence for yourself how they look, and more
importantly, how they feel.

You will find that if you make one of the uni-

versal facial expressions, you begin to feel
that same emotion yourself! Emotions not
only cause facial expressions, facial expres-
sions also can cause emotions. This can be
very helpful when trying to figure out the
meaning of someone’s facial expression.

When I speak with someone and they make a

non-universal expression, I will try to mimic
it and see what emotions surface within me.
This is a very simple way of literally feeling
as your subject feels.

Here is a detailed description of the seven

universal facial expressions and somewhat
 36/243

embarrassing pictures of me making them. I

hope they are helpful!

1) Surprise:
Surprise is the briefest of emotions. It occurs
when the subject is shocked about something
said or done.
-The brows are raised and curved—they
should look like upside-down U’s
-Skin below the brow is stretched
-There can be horizontal wrinkles across the
forehead
-Eyelids are opened, with the white of the
eye showing above and below
-Jaw drops open and teeth are parted. The
lips, jaw and mouth stays loose
2) Fear:

Fear is shown when someone feels terror or

apprehension. This is easy to see in action if
you have the subject watch a horror movie.
-Brows are raised and drawn together, usu-
ally in a flat
 37/243

line
-Wrinkles in the forehead are in the center
between the brows, not across
-Upper eyelid is raised, but the lower lid is
tense and drawn up
-Upper eye has white showing, but not the
lower white
-Mouth is open and lips are slightly tensed or
stretched and drawn back
3) Disgust:
Disgust happens when someone feels repul-
sion or aversion.
-Upper lip is raised
-Nose is wrinkled
-Cheeks are raised
-Lines show below the lower lid
4) Anger:
Anger happens when someone feels rage or
extreme irritation.

I also have one of a man here so you can see

that even though the faces (and sexes) are
different, the same characteristics apply.
 38/243

-The brows are lowered and drawn together

-Vertical lines appear between the brows

-Lower lid is tensed
-Eyes hard stare or bulging
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-Lips can be pressed firmly together with

corners down or square shape as if shouting
-Nostrils may be dilated
-The lower jaw juts out
5) Happiness:

Happiness is the easiest emotion to fake be-

cause a smile comes naturally to us. You can
still discern true happiness or joy when you
see the muscles activated on the outside
corners of the eye (crows feet).
40/243
 41/243

-Corners of the lips are drawn back and up in

a smile
-Mouth may or may not be parted, teeth
exposed
-A crease runs from outer nose to outer lip
 42/243

-Cheeks are raised

-Lower lid may show wrinkles or be tense
-Crows feet near the outside of the eyes
6) Sadness:

Sadness, sorrow or unhappiness is the hard-

est emotion to fake. It is difficult to engage
the lips in a frown or pull the corners of your
eyebrows up without having a genuine feel-
ing of sadness.
 43/243

-Inner corners of the eyebrows are drawn up

-Corner of the lips are drawn down
-Jaw is drawn back
-Lower lip pouts out
7) Contempt or Hatred:

Contempt, disdain, scorn or hatred look very

similar to a smirk, and is often used as a
 44/243

pretense for being happy for someone to cov-

er up jealousy. It is a simple one-sided
mouth raise.
45/243
 46/243

Once you practice these emotions yourself,

see if you can detect them in the people in
your life. You can also watch reality TV as
practice. I have a number of videos on my
ScienceOfPeople.org demonstrating micro-
expressions in the real world.

Interesting Fact: Dr. John Gottman

found contempt can be the biggest
predictor of divorce. When he
interviewed couples, he realized he could
predict with 90% accuracy which
couples would divorce based on which ones
showed contempt in their
interviews.

Here are a few additional notes about the

seven universal microexpressions:

• Surprise and fear are often confused, as

they are similar emotions. It is very import-
ant to know the difference between these two
emotions. Think of the question, “Did you
 47/243

know that Jim cheated on Laura?” A look of

surprise on your significant other’s face
would mean something much different than
fear. Surprise would be an appropriate reac-
tion to finding out about someone cheating.
Fear might cause you to ask some additional
questions about your significant other’s
knowledge or behavior. The easiest way to
tell the difference is by watching the eye-
brows— surprise has upside down U’s and
fear usually has eyebrows in a flat line.

• Anger can be confused with determination

or concentration. This is why it is important
to baseline someone and take note of how
they look when they are concentrating,
nervous or excited. The seven universal mi-
croexpressions are the same for everyone,
but concentration can look vaguely like an-
ger if you do not pay attention.

• Sometimes knowing which emotion you are

seeing is just as important as an emotion you
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are NOT seeing. For example, if you accuse

your subject of breaking an office rule and
they don’t show surprise they probably knew
they did something wrong and are afraid of
getting caught. If you tell a friend some good
news and they do not show genuine happi-
ness they might be covering up feelings of
jealousy.

Below I have two side pictures of a real smile

and a fake one. Can you tell which smile is
real?

Hint: It’s all in the crows feet!

A.
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 50/243

B.

Answer: B. This is the real smile because you

can see the muscles along the sides of the eye
are activated (crows feet).
 51/243

Eyes

It is often said that the eyes are the windows

to the soul, but they can also be windows to
hidden emotions. Below I have outlined
some eye-related nonverbal clues:

1. Eye-Blocking

Covering or shielding the eyes is often exhib-

ited when people literally do not like what
they see. You will see this when people feel
threatened by something or are repulsed by
what they are hearing or seeing. This is an
indicator of unhappy behavior. You also see
eye blocking in the form of eye rubbing and
lots of blinking. Eye blocking is powerful dis-
play of consternation, disbelief or disagree-
ment. This is actually an innate behavi-
or—children who are born blind still cover
their eyes when they hear bad news.

See this example below:

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Eye-Blocking happens when someone liter-

ally does not want to see or believe what’s
happening.
2. Pupillometry

Our pupils dilate when we see something

stimulating or we are in low light. If we are
aroused our pupils dilate in order to take in
more of our pleasing surroundings. Often
during courtship pupils stay dilated. You can
tell when someone is aroused by looking at
the size of his or her pupils.

Interesting Fact: Advertisers almost

always widen the pupils of women in
their ads because it makes their
product look arousing and welcoming.

3. Squinting

People often squint at you when they do not

like you or something you are saying. It can
mean they are suspicious of your message.
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(This is the same principal as eye blocking

above—blocking out what they do not like).
If you see someone squint at you (and it is
not in low light conditions) address him or
her directly and clarify your point. They will
often be amazed you picked up on their
disbelief.

4. Eyebrows
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Eyebrows raised draws attention to the

face.

We raise our eyebrows in a quick flash to

draw attention to our face so we may be able
to send clear communication signals. I notice
I do this when I want to be understood or
emphasize a point. Raising one’s eyebrows is
a gesture of congeniality and hope to get
along well and communicate effectively.

5. Gazing

Gazing can be an intimate activity. In a nor-

mal conversation, we hold direct eye contact
about 30 to 60% of the time. More than 60%
can be unnerving. If you disagree with a su-
perior you can show disagreement by hold-
ing their gaze a bit longer than normal.

An interesting experiment shows the import-

ance of gazing while dating. In one experi-
ment, researchers told one participant on a
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blind date that the other had an eye problem,

but that they didn’t know which eye was
slow. This caused the person to gaze deeply
to try to figure out which eye was the afflic-
ted eye. Interestingly, compared to people on
control dates (they were told nothing about
an eye problem) the people on the eye prob-
lem date rated the date higher and more
intimate.

There are three types of gazing:

Social Gazing- This is when your eyes move

in a triangle shape from the eyes to the
mouth. It is nonaggressive and shows
comfort.

Intimate Gazing- If you want to be intimate

with someone, look from their eyes to their
mouth and then to the body. If someone is
doing this to you it usually means they are
having intimate thoughts about you.
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(Women who play hard to get use the social

gaze, not the intimate gaze in courtship.)
Power Gazing- This is a triangle between the
eyes and the forehead. It avoids the intimate
areas of the mouth and body completely.

6. Sideways Glance

This usually denotes uncertainty or the need

for more info. If the subject glances sideways
and has furrowed brows it can mean suspi-
cion or critical feelings.
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Sideways gaze with eyebrows down shows

suspicion.
If their eyebrows are up and they glance
sideways it usually means interest or is a sign
of courtship.
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Sideways gaze with eyebrows up shows

interest.

See how different these expressions are? One

conveys suspicion and one conveys in-
terest—just by the movement of the
eyebrows!

Try both of these glances on your own and

you will feel the difference in meaning. One
is positive and one is negative. You will learn
more about nonverbal behavior of courtship
in Chapter 7.

7. Looking Down One’s Nose

If someone lifts their head and looks down
their nose at you it usually means they feel
superior.
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Looking down one’s nose at someone is a

way of showing superiority (or leaks that
someone feels superior).
8. Darting Eyes

Darting eyes always means the person feels

insecure or nervous. They are often looking
for escape routes to become more
comfortable.

9. Glasses

Studies show that women who wear glasses

and make-up make the best impressions in
business. Those who wear glasses and peer
over their lenses at others is a sign of intim-
idation or a way to belittle the people around
them.

10. Eye Direction

There are a number of studies examining the

direction of eyes during lies. Typically when
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people look up and to the right they are lying

or tapping into their imagination. When they
look up to the left they are remembering or
recalling something, tapping into the
memory storage part of the brain. However
be sure you get to know their natural move-
ments because this can be reversed for left
handed people. Here are some other
guidelines established by lying studies:

• Looking to Their Right = Auditory Thought

(Remembering a song)
• Looking to Their Left = Visual Thought
(Remembering the color of a dress)
• Looking Down to Their Right = Someone
creating a feeling or sensory memory (Think-
ing what it would be like to swim in cold
water)
• Looking Down to Their Left = Someone
talking to themselves

If you ask someone a question and they look

down to the right—signifying that they were
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creating a memory instead of remembering

something—you might have just caught them
in a lie.

11. Rapid Blinking

People often blink rapidly when they process

emotion or try to figure something out. Men
and women both do this when they are
flustered and are trying to gather their
thoughts.

More About Head Behavior

Head Tilt:
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Head tilt shows interest.

Tilting your head in either direction shows

comfort and inquisitiveness. When your best
friend speaks, you often tilt your head or
lean in towards them to show you are inter-
ested and attentive to their needs and emo-
tions. Men do well by trying this with wo-
men, as it shows them that you are an attent-
ive partner.

Nose Flare:

When someone flares his or her nostrils it

usually means anger. You can see animals do
this before they attack. This is also a difficult
mannerism to fake, so when you see it take
note—it is most likely genuine!

Nose Up or Chin Up:

When someone puts their nose up in the air
or raises their chin up it often means they
feel superior.
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The Tongue:

The tongue can be an interesting emotional

indicator. One must be careful watching an-
other’s mouth because, as we learned in the
gazing tip above, looking at the mouth can be
intimate and therefore inappropriate in a
business meeting.

-Licking and biting the lips or chewing the

inside of ones cheek is usually a sign of
nervousness or insecurity. Biting the nails is
also anxiety. But again, be sure to baseline
someone if you see this behavior because
they could just have chapped lips.
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Biting lips shows nerves.

-Rubbing the tongue along the inside of the

teeth is a self-comforting gesture. People do
it when they are nervous and want to feel
better.
-Occasionally you will see someone perform
a tongue catch. A tongue catch is when
someone sticks their tongue in between their
teeth without touching the lips. People often
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do this when they are caught doing

something they shouldn’t. It’s almost as if
they are catching their own tongue. You see
teenagers do this when Mom catches them
playing video games after hours or if a boss
catches someone’s error in their report.

The tongue catch usually means someone

has been caught in the act.
Touching the Lips or Mouth:
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People often put pens in their mouth or

touch their lips when they are nervous. Nail
biters or people who have chewed their pens
to a pulp are typically more anxious than
average.

Interesting Fact: Sociobiologist

Desmond Morris claims we find it

comforting to put pens, nails or fin-

gers in our mouths when we are
nervous because it reminds us of the
comfort of a mother’s breast.

Puffing Out the Cheeks:

If you have ever seen someone take a deep

breath, puff out their cheeks and then exhale
slowly, you have witnessed the universal be-
havior for a narrow escape and release of
nerves. People often do this as they walk out
of big meetings or narrowly escape a car
accident.
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Puffing out your cheeks and breathing out

usually means someone feels they have nar-
rowly escaped.
Emblems:
An emblem is the nonverbal equivalent of a
word or phrase. For example, a wink is a flir-
tatious gesture.

Interesting Fact: Studies have found

people who wear glasses in business
are taken more seriously. These stud-
ies also looked at women who wear
makeup and found that makeup does
in fact add credibility to a woman,
but too much makeup is seen as inap-
propriate. For a woman, the best
combination for credibility is makeup
and glasses.

Here are some other emblems you will

recognize:
-A hand moving left to right with the palm
facing out means a wave of hello or goodbye.
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-Nodding up and down means “yes.”

-Nodding side to side means “no.”
-A one-eyebrow raise usually means doubt,
suspicion or questioning.
-A dropped jaw is a partial surprise microex-
pression and means someone is dumbfoun-
ded or shocked.
Punctuators:

Punctuators place emphasis on a certain

emotion in a controlled facial gesture. An ex-
ample of a punctuator would be someone
making a purposeful grimace when asked if
they like spinach or sticking your tongue out
after a long run to show someone you are
tired and thirsty. They are conscious facial
movements made to emphasize a point.

A Lying Face

We discussed how to find hidden emotions

in the face, but there are also ways to tell if
someone is lying with certain special facial
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clues. The most important part of detecting

lies through the face is to understand how we
try to control the face when we lie.

When someone lies they typically first think

about the words they use and what they
should say. Next, they usually try to put their
face in an appropriate facial expression—if
they are faking happiness they will try to
smile, if they are feigning surprise they will
usually widen their eyes.

Most people are poor at trying to control

their face and have no idea what expression
they should even be attempting to portray.
Nonverbal knowledge is not commonly
known. Knowing these two things that
people cannot control their facial expres-
sions and that they don’t know what faces to
make when they lie helps us guess what a ly-
ing face might look like.
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There is one more thing that we need to

know about lying and the face: Which
muscles are the easiest to control on com-
mand. As a general rule it is easier to control
the bottom half of the face, especially the
mouth, than it is to control the top half of the
face—eyes, forehead and cheeks.

So, if you suspect someone is lying to you

and you notice any of these facial muscle red
flags, its time to dig a little deeper:

• They have very little facial movement on

the upper part of the face.
• They have incongruous movement when
they are smiling—a one sided mouth raise or
an uneven smile

• They are smiling, but their eyes or eye-

brows show a completely different emotion.
Perhaps their eyes are wide in terror or their
eyebrows are lowered in anger. In other
words, the person is smiling, hoping to
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distract you from the emotion they actually

fear which is truthfully manifesting in the
upper part of their face.

Reality television is actually a great vehicle

for practicing spotting smiles that are hiding
true emotions shown in the upper part of the
face. Especially during reality shows that in-
volve contestants getting eliminated, you of-
ten see rejected contestants smile, hoping to
cover their sadness, which is shown in their
sad eyes (inner corners of the eyebrows
pulled down).

Facial Lying Red Flags:

-Little movement in the top half of the face.

-Incompatible movement between the top

and bottom of the face (The subject smiles,
but their eyes are narrowed in anger and
their crows feet are not engaged.)
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-An asymmetrical expression. This is usually

exhibited when someone is faking an emo-
tion. For example, people often half smile or
smirk when they are pretending to be
happy—not only is this not a full smile, but it
also is the microexpression for contempt,
double red flag!
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The contempt microexpression.

-The timing between words and facial ex-

pressions is off—the subject says he is sur-
prised and then makes the corresponding
surprised facial expression a second later.
This should happen concurrently.
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Watch out for odd microexpressions at the

wrong time.

All of these facial reading tips can be prac-

ticed—rehearse with yourself in the mirror,
watch some reality television or try to
baseline your friends and family. Once you
memorize the universal facial microexpres-
sions you will see them everywhere. It is the
easiest place to start building your liedetec-
tion ability.

Chapter 3: Body Language

This chapter is our longest chapter -- there is
a lot to say about the body!

When people lie, they have a lot to concen-

trate on and often forget about controlling
what their body is saying. A liar has to:

-Know the truth

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-Make up a false story

-Convince you of the false story and change
the story or details based on your reactions.
-Keep the false facts straight in their head
-Try to think how an honest person would
say it and then try to portray that emotion.
-Try to control their face during the lie
-Try to control their body during the lie
-Try to adjust their voice tone and pitch to be
what an honest person does

These are a lot of different things to keep

straight and this is why liars forget to control
their body—they don’t have enough brain
power!

The easiest way to review body language is to

start at the feet and work our way up through
each body part. As we move through differ-
ent body parts I will describe each part’s cor-
responding kinesics (physical movements)
and haptics (touching behaviors). At the end
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of the chapter I also will review proxemics

(body distance between people and objects).

Before I review each part of the body, I want

to explain two important body language be-
havior categories.

1) Blocking Behavior: You will see blocking

behavior occur in almost all body parts.
Blocking behavior happens when the subject
feels threatened or encounters a topic they
do not like. It means they are uncomfortable,
in disagreement or feel disbelief. In the last
chapter we talked about eye blocking. This is
powerful because people actually close or rub
their eyes to block out that what they do not
like. You will see many more examples of
blocking in the body parts below.

2) Pacifying Behavior: Unlike block-

ing—where someone is trying to block out
what is happening, pacifying happens when
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someone is trying to calm themselves down

or self-soothe.

A pacifying behavior is usually what happens

after someone is in a blocking behavior situ-
ation. They are ill at ease, reacting negatively
to something said or done. In the last
chapter I mentioned that rubbing the tongue
along the teeth is a self-soothing or pacifying
behavior. Rubbing or stroking is ingrained in
us from childhood to be a calming action be-
cause as children our parents often rubbed
our backs or heads while rocking us to sleep.
We will self-stroke in various non-sexual
ways to calm ourselves down even as adults
in public situations. Here are some other pa-
cifying behaviors you will read about in
greater depth in the rest of the chapter:

-Rubbing or stroking the neck, forehead or

cheeks (like a parent does to a baby to calm
down).
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-Touching or stroking the arms or rubbing

palms together.
-Playing with jewelry or hair.
-Licking lips or running tongue along the
teeth.
-Running hands along the outside of the
thighs.
-Hands wrapped in shirt or scarf.
-Picking ‘dirt’ out from under nails.
-Squeezing or pinching skin on hands or
arms.
-Tapping fingers.
-Picking cuticles.
-Cracking knuckles or stretching and pulling
on fingers.
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Cracking knuckles is a pacifying behavior.

Feet
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Feet might be the most honest part of the

body because liars often forget to control
them. Evolutionarily they also are the part of
the body that reacts first in fight or flight re-
sponse, so controlling them is very difficult.

People don’t think to control their feet, in-

stead pouring their energy into verbal con-
tent and making their upper body
presentable.

It is a great idea to take notice of your sub-

ject’s feet during baselining—I highly en-
courage job interviewers to use glass tables
or no table at all. I tell poker players to use
glass tables whenever possible as people tend
to jiggle their feet with excitement when they
have a good hand.
Look for these behaviors when baselining
and then look for changes later on:

-The rate at which your subject taps or

jiggles their feet.
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This is an example of someone pointing

their feet in the opposite direction of the per-
son they are speaking with. You can be sure
that they do not want to be a part of the
conversation.

-The direction of your subject’s feet and to

which direction they point. People often
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subconsciously point their feet towards the

exit when they want to leave.

Interesting Fact: Studies have shown

that when jurors do not like a witness
they turn their feet towards the nearest exit.

-People make an L-shape with their feet

when they are trying to be polite and stay en-
gaged, but actually really want to leave.
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L-Shaped feet shows this person is not fully

engaged in the conversation. They literally
have one foot out of the interaction.

-The starters stance is when someone has

one foot back and one foot forward and their
heels are off the floor. This looks like
someone is about to start a race and usually
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signifies that someone is impatient or motiv-

ated to get started.

Starters stance means someone is ready to

bolt.
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-When someone points their toes up it usu-

ally means they feel optimistic and excited.
In fact studies that looked at people dia-
gnosed with clinical depression found that
those patients rarely exhibited this non-
verbal behavior because they are depressed.

Interesting Fact: When we are attrac-

ted to or interested in someone we
often
point our feet towards them when
standing in a group.

It is important to pay attention to the above

foot behaviors to see if there is a difference
from the baseline when tough topics come
up.

Dr. Paul Ekman discovered the number of

unconscious foot movements drastically in-
creased when people lie. As a general rule,
people move their feet when they are
nervous. But again, in order to not confuse
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this with excited jiggling you want to get

someone’s baseline first.

Reversing this situation, if you have a choice

in your own office, you are better off getting
a wooden desk with a panel in front so no
one can see your own foot movements.

Legs

The legs are the body part that grounds us

and moves us through the world. In general,
when we feel upset or threatened we widen
our legs to claim territory and get ready for
an attack. The wider the legs the more con-
fident or dominant the person feels. On the
other hand, if someone has their legs tightly
pressed together or compactly crossed, they
feel vulnerable, shy or unsure.

When you see someone splay their legs it

means they are trying to gain dominance,
stability and control. If you watch people
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experience disagreement they almost never

have their legs crossed. Instead they will of-
ten have their feet spread wide as adrenaline
pumps through their bloodstream.

Men do this to assert dominance or control

in meetings or on dates. In Western movies
cowboys almost always stand with their feet
incredibly wide and thrust their crotch for-
ward in gun duels to demonstrate the ulti-
mate manly display.
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Men take up space when they want to claim

territory. It can be a positive mark of con-
fidence as well as a negative sign of domin-
ance depending on context and accompany-
ing behaviors.

Interesting Fact: Female law

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enforcement officers are often taught

to splay their legs and widen their
stance to look more in control.

Crossed Legs:

Crossed legs can mean one of two

things—and you must collect baseline data to
find out what it means for each person. First,
as the cross-legged positions are hard to at-
tack from, people exhibiting this feel com-
fortable and relaxed. They are at ease with
the other person.
On the other hand, both women and men
sometimes cross their legs when they feel
vulnerable or insecure. They do this to sub-
consciously protect their genitals as well as
to feel smaller and less noticeable to others
in the room. They are literally trying to make
themselves smaller. Studies show people
who lack confidence cross their legs the
most.
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Interesting Fact: If you are among

strangers and you tightly cross your
arms and legs you will notice other
people begin to copy you. This is be-
cause it subconsciously reminds them
you do not know each other. They re-
spond by assuming a protective, vul-
nerable position as well. When you
leave, most will go back to a relaxed
position.

There are a few different kinds of leg crosses

each with slightly varied meanings:

1) Tight Cross: This is when the legs are very

close together in a cross. Research shows
that in business contexts people in this posi-
tion have shorter sentences, reject more pro-
posals and recall less detail of what was said.
In general, the tighter the cross the more
close-minded the person.
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2) The L Cross: The L cross is when someone

has their ankle resting on their other knee in
a more open position. People in this position
tend to feel more argumentative and
competitive.
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The L-shaped cross is confident for an

American man.

Interesting Fact: During World War

II Germans could spot American spies
when they sat in this L Cross position. It be-
came popular in the states after
cowboys in Western movies used it, but had
not caught on in Germany.

3) Ankle Lock: Those who cross their ankles

but not their whole legs are often holding
back and have a withdrawn attitude. In one
survey of 319 dental patients, only 68% of
patients locked their ankles when they only
needed a check-up. Whereas 88% of them
locked their ankles when they needed to have
work done. 98% of patients locked their
ankles when injected.

*Researchers Gerard Nierenberg and Henry

Calero found that during negotiations people
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with locked ankles were also holding back

valuable concessions or information.

4) Leg Twine: When you see a women (men

rarely do this) cross her legs and tuck her
ankle around her calf it usually means she is
feeling shy.

5) Up Parallel Legs: This is when a woman

tucks her legs up under her so they are paral-
lel to the floor. Oddly this is the most attract-
ive female sitting position according to men
because their narrow hips do not allow them
to sit that way and it is a reminder of a wo-
man’s femininity.

Torso

Torso behavior is easier to isolate if you

speak to someone sitting behind a desk. Here
are some torso body language clues you can
spot:
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The Lean:

The torso or body trunk will actually lean to-

wards people or subjects they are interested
in. Conversely they will lean away if they feel
threatened or hear something unfavorable.
For especially damaging lies, you will often
see liars lean back as they speak the lie, as if
they subconsciously want to move away from
the lie. In Presidential debates you will also
see candidates lean back when their oppon-
ent accuses them of wrongdoing or issues a
false charge.

Suprasternal Notch:
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Touching the suprasternal notch is comfort-

ing for both men and women (men tend to
touch their tie which lies directly over the
suprasternal notch).

This is the point right at the hollow of the

neck where the collarbones meet. People
touch this area when they feel distressed,
threatened or insecure. Touching the
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suprasternal notch is a soothing gesture.

Women will touch the spot with their fingers
or rub a necklace that falls on that area. Men
will often adjust their tie (which lies right
above the suprasternal notch).

The Turtle:

Sometimes people will inch their shoulders

up towards their ears and clasp their hands
to their sides. This happens when people lose
confidence or are embarrassed. They are
literally

trying to retreat into their imaginary shell,

just like a turtle, to make themselves look
smaller. Dogs do this when they are pun-
ished. Kids sitting outside the principal’s of-
fice are almost always in the turtle position.

Interesting Fact: If you watch secur-

ity camera videos of shoplifters right
before they steal, they often try to
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make their body as compact as pos-

sible so as not to be noticed.

Air Pull:

Have you ever seen someone pull their collar

away from their neck as if to get more air? Of
course people do this when they feel warm,
but they also do this when they feel uncom-
fortable or nervous with a topic. Women will
also pull their hair off their neck. This beha-
vior is due to nerves causing adrenaline re-
lease, which in turn makes blood pump
faster, causing us to feel warm.

Object Block:

Holding an object in front of our torso makes

us feel more secure and protected. Teens fre-
quently walk school hallways holding a note-
book to their chest (even when they have a
backpack capable of carrying their books)
because it makes them feel more secure. In
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business situations people place their coffee

cup and put it in front of them when talking
about a difficult topic. Notice when people
pick up items and place them between them-
selves and the subject—it is usually not
accidental.

Heavy Breathing:

This one is fairly obvious. When we are

nervous or anxious our body tries to bring
more oxygen to the muscles, blood and brain
to prepare to fight or flee. We breathe more
heavily and our chest rises and falls more
acutely.

Body Hug and Crossed Arms:

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Crossed arms protects our vital organs.

When subjects feel insecure, worried, scared

or anxious, they frequently cover their chest
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with their arms or wrap their body in a kind

of self-hug. They do this because it protects
vital organs. People will tell you “they just
feel more comfortable with crossed arms.”
Well of course they do! If their arms are
crossed, their vital organs are protected
which lowers their heart rate and makes
them feel more relaxed. This is a position of
self-defense and is exactly why it is
comfortable.

Bowing:

People subconsciously bow to those they re-

spect or when they want to show subservi-
ence. You often see lower level employees
bow slightly when their boss passes them in
the hallway. When looking at a group you
can almost always tell who is the alpha mem-
ber by who stands up straight the entire time
and doesn’t bow to the others in the group.

Shrugging:
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A double shrug is honest behavior for “I

don’t know.” A oneshouldered shrug is not
fully confident and can be a body slip. For
example, people often shrug just one
shoulder when they lie. This is their body’s
way of giving away the untruth. You will
learn more about this in later chapters, but a
general rule of thumb is to pay attention to
any uneven expressions. Uneven facial ex-
pressions like contempt and uneven shrugs
are red flags.

Neck:

Anytime someone touches his or her neck it

is most likely a self-soothing or pacifying be-
havior. A neck touch indicates stress, high
emotionality, high anxiety or worry. Again
this behavior does not mean a lie is being
told, but it does signify the person is anxious
about the current topic. When people mas-
sage their neck it lowers their heart rate and
calms them down.
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*I have one friend who touches her neck con-

stantly because she is an anxious person in
general. Her baseline behavior includes fre-
quent neck touching. In her case I do not pay
much attention because I know it is normal
behavior.

Arm Behavior

Our arms serve to protect our trunk and vital

organs from threat. When cross our arms on
our chest we are usually reacting to some ex-
ternal threat, and subconsciously protect
ourselves. We often cross our arms when we
hear something threatening, confrontational
or when we feel vulnerable.

Interesting Fact: Hitler used to raise

his right arm in salute, but almost al-
ways had his left arm in front of his
crotch. Subconsciously this could
have
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happened because he was missing his left

testicle and he wanted to protect the area.

Unfortunately crossing our arms isn’t just a

defensive posture, but the position also
makes us feel more closeminded. This is the
same concept as the face--not only do our
emotions cause body language behaviors, but
body language can also activate certain
emotions.

Arm crossing compounds our already close-

minded and fearful attitude. When you see
someone cross their arms, you can help
move them to a more comfortable mindset
by asking them to sit down (if they are stand-
ing), or handing them a glass of water (if
they are sitting) to get them to physically un-
cross their arms and out of the defensive
mindset. The opposing behavior to crossed
arms occurs when we swing and move our
arms freely. For example, children are more
mentally free and tend to have freer range of
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motion with their arms. Typically, the more

arm use you see the happier and more con-
fident the person is.

Interesting Fact: When athletes win a

race they almost always raise their
arms and chin to the sky. Even blind
athletes do this after finishing a race,
even though they never saw others do
this. It seems to be an inherent re-
sponse to winning, and is the body
language of pride and confidence.

Clenched Fists Arms Cross:

If someone has their fists clenched as they

cross their arms it means they are feeling
even more hostile and aggressive than a nor-
mal arm cross.

Thumbs Up Arms Cross:

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If someone has their thumbs up while their

arms are crossed they are exhibiting signs of
having a superior attitude.
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 118/243

Thumbs up cross is both confident and

superior.
Stiff vs. Drooping:

Stiff arms are usually a sign of nervous ten-

sion. Depressed people usually exhibit
drooping, lifeless arms—this is why cartoons
always depict people who are grouchy or sad
as slouching with hanging arms. This is a
universal body language behavior for
sadness.

Arms Behind the Back:

When people put their arms behind their

back and grab one wrist, it shows supreme
confidence. Politicians and British royals of-
ten do this. This is a powerful gesture be-
cause it exposes the most vulnerable part of
the body—the groin for men and chest area
for women. Only a supremely confident per-
son places their hands behind their back in
that way. You often see principals or teachers
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do this as they walk up and down rows of

student’s desks during tests.
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Territorial Claims:

When a subject puts their arm around anoth-

er chair or spreads their arms out on a table
they are putting on a territorial display of
control and dominance. You will see people
do this in business scenarios when they want
to show they are in the power position. You
also see men act this way on dates to assert
dominance. Another way to assess how con-
fident someone feels is by watching where
they place their elbows in a chair with arms.
If they place their elbows on the inside of a
chair, taking up as little space as possible,
this usually denotes low self-esteem.
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Hands on Hips:

Putting hands on your hips is typically an ag-

gressive stance. Men in the military do this
with their hands on their hips and thumbs
on lower backs. You will see people do this
when they are feeling attacked or threatened,
but want to visually communicate they are
standing their ground. In addition people of-
ten puff out their chest when their hands are
on their hips and they feel confrontational.
This is a great pose for women who want to
stand up to someone because women don’t
often take this position and it connotes
power and confidence.

Hands Behind Head : Putting hands be-

hind your head (which is often accompanied
by putting feet on a desk) makes you seem
bigger, relaxed and in charge. As with other
physical behaviors these also are the exact
feelings that cause you to take those actions.
This is not only a territorial claim (placing
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feet on the desk), but also a confidence beha-

vior. You take up physical space and leave
the torso exposed.
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Hand Behavior

Hand behavior is usually the second area

people notice after their facial movements.
Handshakes also typically call our attention
to hands during an initial greeting.

Our brains actually give a disproportionate

amount of attention to the wrists, palms, fin-
gers and hands. Researchers think this is be-
cause we have a survival need to assess
hands. Hitler used to film himself speaking
so he could observe his hand movements. He
wanted to use them more powerfully for
audiences because he intuitively knew how
important they are to perception.

In general, showing your hands is honest and

hiding them is seen as deceptive. The phrase
‘showing your hand’ has literal meanings in
body language.
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Interesting Fact: Jurors find defend-

ants who put their hands under the
table more sneaky or mistrustful.

Here are a few hand behaviors and their cor-

responding meanings:
Shame:

When people are embarrassed or feel intense

shame you will often see them lightly touch
or gently rub the side of their forehead. This
can be accompanied by a slight head nod or a
sadness microexpression.
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Steepling:

Steepling occurs when someone brings their

hands up towards their chest or face and
presses the tips of their fingers together. This
is a gesture of confidence, selfassuredness
and even superiority. This can easily be done
to inspire confidence in yourself and others
during a meeting or interview. This is of par-
ticular benefit for females as it is seen as an
assertive gesture, not aggressive. Putting
hands in the prayer position, a slight vari-
ation of the steeple, is a less confident
gesture.

Rubbing Palms Together:

When we rub our palms together it means

we have a positive expectation of the subject
at hand. The faster the pace of the rub, the
more positive and excited we feel.
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We rub our palms together when we are ex-

cited about something that is about to
happen.
Pointing the Finger:

Pointing a finger at someone is an aggressive

act. It always rubs people the wrong way as it
seems accusatory to the receiving party. Do-
ing this regularly can breed long-term
mistrust.

Fists:

Whenever you see someone with clenched

fists—whether in an arm cross, on a desk or
in their lap, it means they have a restrained,
anxious or negative attitude.

Face Hold:

When people (especially women) place their

hands under their chin in a presentation of
the face, this is usually an invitation for more
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interaction. It shows interest and is typically

seen in romantic situations as a flirtatious
behavior.

Nervous Hands:
Shaking or rattling a pen and hand wringing
are all nervous behaviors—if they differ from
someone’s baseline.
Thumb Behavior:

When we display our thumbs in the up posi-

tion it is positive, cool and confident. When
people put them in the down position or hide
them in pockets it is the opposite— signify-
ing low self-esteem, shyness or low
confidence.

*When men put their hands in their pockets

and let their thumbs hang out it symbolizes
male virility. This is because the thumbs
draw attention to the male genitals and is
therefore the ultimate come hither
move—think the Fonz from Happy Days who
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loved that stance. Be careful not to overuse

it. Although it is a confidence behavior for
males, it can be perceived as too aggressive
for some females.

Palm Behavior:

The palms up position is the universal sym-

bol for openmindedness and trustworthiness
as you are literally showing your hand. When
people put their palms down as they speak it
tends to rub people the wrong way because it
connotes superiority and concealment.

Chin Stroking:

As seen in most cartoons, chin stroking usu-

ally happens when someone is trying to de-
cide something or figure out an answer. In
sales you might see someone do this and
then sit back with their arms crossed—this
usually means they made a negative decision
to refuse your request.
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 135/243

We stroke our chin when trying to make a

decision or while figuring something out.
Rubbing Neck vs. Rubbing Forehead:

Desmond Morris found that the tissues in

the neck have increased blood flow when
someone lies. This is why people often rub
their neck when they lie. People who rub
their neck are often anxious. In fact, Gerard
Nierenberg found that those who rub the
back of their neck are more negative and
critical than those who rub their fore-
heads—these people are typically more open
and easy going. A slap or rub of the forehead
usually means someone is unsure or
surprised.

Touching or Chewing:

When people fidget with their jewelry, touch

their hair, cufflinks or tie, they are usually
nervous and want reassurance. These are
self-comforting gestures.
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Covering the Mouth:

People usually cover their mouths when one

of two things happen. The first situation
where people cover their mouth is when they
are surprised or shocked. The second is
when they tell a lie. You see this with chil-
dren who cover their mouths when telling a
lie. Adults who are lying still do this by wip-
ing their mouth or lips.

Body Proxemics

Proxemics is the physical space between

people and how they move in relation to each
other. Typically intimate space extends 6 to
18 inches away from a person. Personal
space is 18 to 48 inches away and social
space is 4 to 12 feet away. Our personal space
is very important to us. You can often gauge
how shy or open someone is by noticing how
far they stand from you while speaking. Keep
in mind that proxemics can vary culturally;
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these numbers are based on American

standards.

The most intimate proxemic activity is touch

because it has the least amount of distance
between people. When used correctly touch
can increase trust and connection. In one ex-
periment researchers at the University of
Minnesota put a coin in a phone booth and
then returned to ask the next person if they
had left it. When the asker touched the elbow
of the person, 68% gave it back. When they
didn’t touch the person’s elbow only 23% re-
turned the coin.

In another study librarians touched people’s

hands as they handed them their library
books. All of the people who got their hands
touched rated the librarian more favorably in
an exit survey. Appropriate touch breeds
rapport and relationships.
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You might be wondering what I mean by ‘ap-

propriate touch?’ Typically the closer to the
body trunk touch is placed, the more intim-
ate (and possibly inappropriate) the touch.
Therefore less intimate areas you might ap-
ply touch are from the elbow to the hand.

Elbow to shoulder can be OK, but still more

intimate than elbow to hand, and anything
on the trunk goes into personal space—so
you should only touch someone on their
torso, head or neck if you know them well.

Interesting Fact: When no one else is

around, smokers tend to blow smoke
up when they are feeling good and
down when they are feeling negative.

Distance and touch are not the only aspects

of proxemics. Angles between subjects and
body direction are also important. People
who are interested in what you are saying
will aim their body and feet towards you
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while speaking. If they are not interested or

distracted they will often turn their body
away from you or point their feet towards the
exit.

Objects also play a factor in proxemics. As I

mentioned above, people place objects in
front of them when they feel threatened or
vulnerable. The closer someone puts an ob-
ject to their body the more insecure they feel.
People do this with notepads, purses,
briefcases, pillows and coffee mugs.

Someone putting a coffee mug on the table

next to them is not an insecure behavior.
However picking up that same cup and pla-
cing it directly in front of them, or between
the two of you or holding it in front of their
chest is usually a subconscious protective
behavior.
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Chapter 4: Vocal Displays,

Voice Tone and Language
Patterns
Interesting Fact: Many studies have
shown the more a child is punished,
the more likely they are to lie.

What we say might not be important as how

we say it. Voice tone, vocal patterns and
word choice are great clues for spotting lies
and hidden emotions.

In a 2004 study researchers found that liars

are much more talkative and use a third
more words than people telling the truth.
This is because liars tend to provide more
and more detail to convince you of their lie.
The most effective lie detection technique is
to stay quiet and listen. You want to see if
and how the other person fills the silence.
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And then continue to ask open-ended

questions

Interesting Fact: 85% of college age

couples lied about prior
relationships.

We intuitively know to ask open-ended ques-

tions and search for deeper meaning when
we think we are being lied to. To test this
point researchers had two groups of people
participate in online chats.

In one group people were told the truth. In

another people were told lies by the other
person chatting with them. The group being
lied to asked far more questions than the
group hearing the truth. Somehow people
knew there was

something fishy going on and kept digging

deeper. This is exactly how you should be-
have in a situation where you want the
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truth—keep quiet until they stop talking and

then continue to ask open-ended questions.

Phone calls and person-to-person interaction

is where the most lies happen. A study con-
ducted over a weeklong period found there
were lies in:

37% of phone calls

27% of face to face
21% of IM chats
14% of emails

Researchers think this is because people do

not like lying ‘on paper’ where it can be saved
and re-shared. This is why it is always good
to follow up in-person meetings with a sum-
mary email the subject can confirm.

There are a few things to look out for when

speaking to someone on the phone or in per-
son before following up in writing. Let’s
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review some of the verbal clues for deception

in conversation.

Verbal Clues to Deception

1. Delayed Responses

When people delay their response by repeat-

ing your question, or say things like “let me
think about that,” they are often stalling for
time to concoct their lie. They might also
delay with parrot statements or by repeating
your own previous words. Delayed responses
might also avoid answering all together, “Is
everyone having to answer this?” or “I’m so
busy right now I don’t think I can get into
this with you.” These are all avoidance an-
swers and should be seen as red flags. They
might also say, “Let me think” or “As far as I
can recall.” These both delay the response.
An honest person will want the truth out as
soon as possible.

2. Answering with Generalizations

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Another way people delay their response to

buy time to think about their lie is by an-
swering with a sweeping
generalization. This is a way of avoiding hav-
ing to flat out lie. For example, a manager
could ask their employee, “Did you steal
from the company?” and the employee could
answer, “I don’t believe in stealing.” Or “How
could you ask me that?” These are all red
flags for deception.

3. Brainstorming with You

Honest people will often help you brain-

storm suspects and they are cooperative.
They are more than willing to talk to you
about the topic because they do not feel guilt
or fear they have something to hide. Guilty
people will try to get off the topic as soon as
possible and then show relief once the topic
is changed.

4. Punishment Recommendations
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If you ask an honest person what they think

the punishment should be for the crime you
are talking about, they will most likely be
strict. If you ask a guilty person, they will
suggest leniency because they are the one
who did it. This is a strategy used by some
police with suspects they believe are guilty.

Beware: Pathological liars can be extremely

manipulative and they might suggest even
harsher punishments for themselves because
they think of themselves as immune to
punishment.

5. Emphasis Statements

Liars tend to use bolstering statements like

“Swear to God” or “Let me be honest.” Truth
tellers do not use these because they do not
need to bolster what they are saying—it is
already true.
 146/243

Interesting Fact: Studies found people

lie in one in ten interactions with
their spouses. However, this is far
higher for interactions with romantic
partners who are not spouses. Non-
married romantic partners lie in one
in three interactions! However, even
though spouse lie less, they do tell the
grandest lies.

6. Distancing From the Lie

In both emails and speech, people distance

themselves from their lie by not using pro-
nouns or people’s names. If asked, “How did
you like the dinner?” They might say “Real
good,” or “Liked it.”

Another form of distancing language used by

liars is when liars say ‘that house,’ instead of
‘my house’ or ‘that woman’ instead of ‘Mon-
ica Lewinsky.’
 147/243

7. Non-Contracted Statements

Subconsciously, honest people want to tell

the truth as soon as possible. This typically
means they use contractions when they
speak—don’t instead of do not. Liars don’t
use contractions because they want to em-
phasize the ‘not.’ When thinking quickly liars
will often add a simple “no” or “not” in front
of the real truth because it is easier than
coming up with a complex fib. For example,
Bill Clinton said, “I did not have sexual rela-
tions with that woman,” instead of “I didn’t.”

8. Story-Telling

Honest people typically tell a story with sens-

ory details and don’t sound rehearsed. Liars
rehearse their story and usually do not have
as many sensory details because it did not
actually happen. They also usually have a
long built up prologue, whereas honest
people get right through to the meat of the
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story. Some researchers suggest having liars

draw out the story after telling it. Liars have
a very hard time drawing out sketches of
places and people who aren’t real. Honest
people (even if they aren’t good drawers) can
do very quick crude drawings because they
can draw from a real picture in their mind.

Researchers had one group of subjects parti-

cipate in a fake espionage game and another
group pretend they participated in the game.
Then the researchers asked both subjects to
draw certain details of the experience. The
biggest differences between the liars’ draw-
ings and the honest peoples’ drawings were:

-80% of truth tellers drew the other person

in the situation in their drawings while liars
only drew the other person 13% of the time.

-53% of the truth tellers drew from a

shoulder-camera view while liars drew from
the overhead view (19% only 19% drew from
 149/243

overhead?). This makes sense because hon-

est people drew from their own genuine per-
spective. Liars made up their story so they
could only draw the entire scene from the
overhead perspective.

9. Voice Tone

A woman’s voice pitch tends to rise when she

lies while a man’s voice pitch tends to drop.
This is why it is important to notice
someone’s baseline voice pitch. If you notice
a significant difference when a given topic
comes up, this can be a red flag.

10. Would, Should, Could

Liars will also use would, should, could in-

stead of saying I didn’t. For example,
someone might say “I would never cheat.”
Instead of “I didn’t cheat.” This is a subcon-
scious way of avoiding having to lie.
 150/243

11. Stop Start Sentences

Liars will often start a sentence and then

stop in the middle, as if they are confirming
the thought in their head or making sure it
matches the story. They might also waver
back and forth on an idea. They can jump
from one opinion or fact to the next because
they are unsure of what you believe and what
will be convincing.

You might also notice they have a varied

speech rate in between their sentences. So-
metimes they speak fast and sometimes they
slow down. Liars do this as their brain tries
to process the lie on the way to their mouth.

12. Character Testimony

Sometimes liars will try to convince you that

they are a good person or reference their
character instead of giving you information
on the lie. For example, when asking a guilty
 151/243

person if they stole the money, they might

say, “My friends will tell you I’m really
honest.”

They could also mention something that is

truthful to distract you from the lie. They
could say. “Someone stole money? But, I just
got a raise.”

Interesting Fact: Extroverts lie more

than shy people and persist longer in
their lies.

This is another subtle difference between li-

ars and truth tellers. Liars are trying to con-
vince you of something, whereas honest
people are trying to convey something. If
someone is telling you the truth they are
simply conveying what happened. The verbal
clues above will help you decipher if
someone is convincing or conveying.

Voice Tone and Bonding

 152/243

Being attuned to voice tone is also important

for bonding.

In one study published in the Personality

and Social Psychology Bulletin found that
when employees mirrored the voice patterns
and verbal activity level during interviews
this built rapport and made them more con-
versationally engaging. In fact, those that fo-
cused on verbal rapport building tactics, re-
ceived nearly 30% better terms during em-
ployment negotiation!

Chapter 5: Clues to Behavior

Now that we have reviewed all the areas of
the body and typical verbal patterns of de-
ceit, I want to remind you two of the most
important aspects of lie detection are:
 153/243

• There is no “smoking gun” that means

someone is lying. You have to look at clusters
of clues called “red flags”.
• Even though it is good to know frequent ly-
ing habits, you must establish someone’s
baseline behavioral patterns to know if the
behavior is unique to them.

In this chapter I want to review the most

common clues to deceit and how they appear
as clusters of red flags during interactions.

Most Common Lying Gestures

Frozen Bodies:

When people freeze their upper bodies it is

usually because their limbic response is tak-
ing over. When someone knows they have to
lie, they typically feel fearful and their limbic
brain tells their body to freeze so as not to at-
tract attention.

Odd Smiles:
 154/243

It is easier to control the bottom half of our

face, so liars usually actively put their
mouths in whatever feigned expression they
want you to believe. Remember the one
sided smile is actually the micro-expression
for contempt. Don’t confuse this for happi-
ness! It means the person feels disdain or
hatred at what you are talking about.

Lip Pursing:

People purse their lips when they are holding

back information. They are literally trying to
hold it in. If you see this behavior it is a good
idea to ask some open-ended questions to
find out what is being held back.
155/243
 156/243

Lip-pursing is a big red flag because it usu-

ally means someone is holding something
back or is unhappy with the way things are
going.

Nodding:

If someone is saying something positive they

usually nod their head in a “yes” gesture. If
they are saying something negative they
should be shaking their head “no”. If their
head

movement does not match their verbal mes-

sage, it is a red flag and a signal to dig a little
deeper.

Delayed or Mismatched Behavior:

Honest people have great synchronicity

between words and gestures. They say they
are sad and instantly a frown appears, they
say they are excited and can’t stop smiling.
 157/243

Watch out for people who have delayed or

mismatched reactions. If they say they are
angry, but their eyebrows rise in surprise
this is a red flag. If they say they are worried
but then make a worried microexpression,
this is a red flag.

Eye Blocking:
When people squint, rub or shield their eyes,
they are hearing or saying something they do
not want to see or acknowledge.
One-Sided Lifts:

I mentioned that any kind of uneven behavi-

or, whether a onesided mouth or eyebrow
raise or a one-sided shoulder shrug, is a red
flag for deceit. These are fairly easy to spot
when they differ from someone’s baseline.

Nervous Gestures:

You should pay extra attention any time a

subject exhibits nervous behavior as it
 158/243

indicates they may lie about the topic. Here

are some common nervous behaviors men-
tioned in previous chapters:

-Hand wringing
-Tapping feet
-Inward curled feet
-Biting the inner cheek, lips, nails or pens
-Sweating or heavy breathing
-Tightly crossed arms
-Fidgeting with jewelry or cufflinks
How We React to Our Own Lies

We subconsciously have reactions to our own

lies. We have a subconscious aversion to ly-
ing even though everyone does it with great
frequency. Here are a few things liars
subconsciously do in negative reaction to
their own lies:

1. Cover the Mouth

 159/243

People will typically cover or wipe their

mouths after a lie because they do not like
what they are saying.
2. Moving Back

After telling a lie you will often see the liar

lean their body back as if they are trying to
get away from the incriminating statement.
They might also scoot back their chair.

3. Tingling Nose

Scientists at the Smell and Taste Treatment

and Research Foundation in Chicago found
that when you lie, chemicals are released in
nasal tissue causing slight swelling. This in-
creased blood flow can cause slight itching.
When people lie they tend to rub their nose.
Perhaps the Pinocchio fable was not so far
off.

Interesting Fact: Alan Hirsch and

Charles Wolf watched Bill Clinton’s
 160/243

testimony during the Monica Lewin-

sky trial and tracked that when Clin-
ton touched his nose far more times
when he lied than when he was telling
the truth. This example shows why
baselining is very important.

Meanings of Other Everyday Gestures

• Patting: Any kind of pat on the shoulder,

back or head is seen as demeaning. It is usu-
ally done by someone who feels superior to
the person they are patting.

• Head tilt: A head tilt means someone is en-

gaged and interested. Women do this to flirt.

Interesting Fact: In paintings over the

last two thousand years, women are
depicted with a tilted head three times
as often as men.
 161/243

• Chin Jut: When people jut their chin, it is

part of the anger microexpression and usu-
ally is a sign of aggression and defiance.
• Lowered Head: A lowered head is always
negative— it means someone is feeling vul-
nerable, judgmental, disengaged or lacks
confidence.

• Lint picking: Unless there is an obvious

piece of lint, lint-pickers are typically ex-
tremely judgmental and opinionated.
Beware!

How to Get Someone to Tell You More:

When you sit down to speak with someone

you want to read in-depth, there are a few
tactics you should use. After baselining your
subject, remember to ask open-ended ques-
tions and then wait for complete responses.
Here are some additional ways to get the
subject to divulge even more information:
 162/243

Do Not Fill the Silence. Wait an extra beat

after your subject finishes talking to make
sure they do not have anything else to add. It
is amazing how much liars will divulge in
these moments.

Invade Their Personal Space: People get a bit

rattled when you enter their personal space.
Pull a chair closer, or take a step towards
them. This makes them feel more transpar-
ent and will often encourage them to dig a
little deeper.

Ask them About Motivation: Ask someone

what possible motivation there could have
been for the actions in question. Honest
people have a harder time coming up with
answers, and might even refuse to answer
you because they didn’t do it. Liars have
their own reasons and therefore have an
easier time coming up with possible
explanations.
 163/243

Nod Your Head: Head nodding is a universal

sign of agreement. Research shows that
people will talk three to four times more than
usual if the listener nods their head as the
speaker talks. You can also do this when
someone finishes speaking to get them to say
more. When someone finishes speaking,
stroke your chin (the body language for
thinking) and nod your head three times to
get them to keep talking. If they have any-
thing they are holding back, this can unlock
their thoughts by making you seem inter-
ested and agreeable.

How to Get Someone to Confess:

Talk in a Different Way: In addition to ask-

ing someone to draw their story (as men-
tioned in the last chapter), you can also ask
them to retell the story backwards or with
different starting points. Honest people have
no problem with this, whereas liars have a
 164/243

more difficult time rearranging events be-

cause their story is not real.

Propose Possible Rationalizations: Liars tend

to feel relief or perk up when you create a ra-
tionalization for their wrongdoing. For ex-
ample if someone is stealing from the com-
pany you could say, “I understand why this
would happen in this hard economy, people
just need a little more to get by.” See if the
person acknowledges the reason with a head
nod, smile or by sitting up.

Tell a Worse Version: Tell the subject a more

damning version of what you think
happened and see if they try to correct you. If
they do, you get a confession. You also can
see if they react to the worse version in a dif-
ferent way than what you think actually
happened. Let’s say you ask your teenager if
they took money out of your wallet and they
say no with a frozen upper body. Then you
ask them if they took money and a credit
 165/243

card out of your wallet and they say no, but

begin to gesticulate and get animated. Their
different reaction to the two stories shows
you that one is true and one is false. You can
discern the answer by pursuing a different
line of questioning.

Minimize the Significance: This is a classic

technique used by TV show cops all the time.
Empathize with the person you are speaking
with and make the wrongdoing sound like no
big deal. Often times the subject will latch on
to this lenient line of thinking and either
confess or give you a clue as to their
thinking.

It is important to note that even honest

people can mess up or have trouble getting
out what really happened when under ex-
treme pressure. This is why it is important to
stay calm during the interaction with your
subject and if you know that they are skit-
tish, be less aggressive to keep them calm.
 166/243

Chapter 6: Your Nonverbal

Behavior
I have spent most of the book reviewing how
to read other people’s nonverbal behavior,
but of course all of this applies to our own
body language as well. The microexpressions
I reviewed in Chapter 2 that can be read on
other’s faces are also displayed on your own
face when you feel a strong emotion.

Here are some other areas to pay particular

attention to when thinking about what your
nonverbal behavior is saying to the world.

Your Nonverbal Behavior

Synchronicity and Mimicry

Mimicry or synchronicity happens when

your behavior mimics or mirrors someone
else’s. We do this
 167/243

subconsciously when we feel a connection to

another person, but you can also mimic
someone’s behavior intentionally to build
rapport. Of course you want to do this subtly
and with caution. It is difficult to mimic
someone in a genuine fashion. If they notice
your attempts it can feel unnerving or forced.
Matching someone’s cadence, tone or seating
position is a delicate way of showing them
you are on the same page and can be very ef-
fective and building a deeper relationship.

Angle Yourself:

When people are seated directly across from

one another at a table subjects are able to re-
call less of what is said. The other person is
also always perceived to be more antagonist-
ic. When our bodies are positioned directly
opposing someone else, our brains follow
suit. At everything from parties to inter-
views, it is best to sit or stand at a slight
angle. This is much less threatening and
 168/243

lowers the heart rate of both participants. On

dates, couches or circular tables where you
can angle your body towards each other are
best.

This is the ideal angle to speak at a party or

meeting. You want to be turned in towards
each other, but not directly opposed.
 169/243

Remember you can look at foot behavior to

tell if someone is not totally engaged in your
conversation.
Seating Choices:

In addition to choosing seats at an angle in-

stead of directly opposing your partner, you
should also avoid sitting on low sofas or
chairs—they make you look small and weak.
If you have to sit on a sofa sit on the edge so
 170/243

you are not forced to slouch. Also be sure to

make use of chair arms instead of resting
arms against your body. Keeping arms close
to your body also makes you look weak and
childlike.

Avoiding Others:

Let’s say you are on an airplane and really do

not want the person next to you to talk to
you. Alternatively you might be on a public
bus and do not want someone to sit down
next to you. Here are a few nonverbal beha-
viors to get people to not want to connect
with you:

• Avoid eye contact.

• Take up as much physical space as possible.
• Place your items on the seat next to you.
• Slouch your shoulders.
• Cross your arms.
 171/243

This may be rude, but will work more often

than not!
Why You Shouldn’t Lie

Although it is not a focus of this book, read-

ers are able to use some of the lie detection
tips to become better liars themselves. Lying
can be dangerous both legally and person-
ally. A lie is considered common-law fraud if
it misrepresents a material fact and the liar
knows or believes that it is untrue. If the liar
intends to mislead a victim into making a de-
cision or action based on the lie, this can of-
ten lead to damage or injury to the victim.

Lying is also bad for your health. Anita Kelly,

a psychology professor from the University
of Notre Dame, randomly put people aged 18
to 71 into two groups. One group was told to
stop telling lies. The control group was told
nothing. Each week the groups were asked
with polygraph tests how many lies they told
 172/243

each week and gave updates on their rela-

tionship status and health.

Amazingly, the group that was trying to tell

less lies said they felt less depressed and
anxious and had less health issues like colds
and headaches. The group that lied less also
felt their personal relationships improved.

Here are some of the negative effects of lying

on your health:

• As seen in Anita Kelly’s study, lying raises

levels of your toxic stress hormone, cortisol.
• Lying is shown to increase a person’s in-
ternal negative emotions overall.
• When someone is lying it, clouds their abil-
ity to think clearly.

Interestingly, we often lie hoping to gain

power. Power has some of the opposite ef-
fects that lying has. For example:
 173/243

• Power lowers levels of cortisol.

• Power increases feelings of positive emo-
tions in the power holder.
• Power can increase your cognitive function,
allowing you to think more clearly.

Subconsciously we make the choice to brave

lying in order to get a chance at receiving
some of the positive benefits of power.
However, power has negative social effects
and when our lies do not work, we are left
worse off than when we started.

The moral of the story? Tell the truth.

How to Make A Great First Impression

Most people will judge you within the first

second of meeting you and their opinion will
most likely never change. Making a good first
impression is incredibly important; you only
get one shot at it.
 174/243

Princeton University psychologist Alex

Todorov and coauthor Janine Willis, had
subjects look at a microsecond of video of a
political candidate. Amazingly, research sub-
jects could predict with 70-percent accuracy
who would win the election just from that
microsecond of tape. This tells us that people
can make remarkably accurate snap judg-
ments in a tenth of a second.

How can you ensure people judge you accur-

ately and also see your best side? First, you
never want to give an inauthentic impression
— many people can intuitively feel if
someone is being fake. Second, any time you
meet someone for the first time, you should
start on the right foot. Here are a few ways
you can make sure people’s first impression
of you is a good one:

1. Handshakes:
 175/243

Handshakes are extremely important. A

firm, straight up and down handshake is
most favorable. When shaking hands, you
may sometimes encounter what is known as
a dominant

handshake. A dominant handshake is when

the person attempting domination moves
their hand ‘on top’ of the clasp. The weaker
person is on the bottom part of the hand-
shake because they have exposed the under-
side of their wrist—which is a physically
weaker position. You often see politicians
jockey for the dominant handshake position
when meeting in front of cameras. If
someone does this to you— and you feel
them pull your palm up as their hand takes
the upper position—beware of their aggres-
sion or perceived feelings of superiority. Two
equals usually shake hands up and down
with no one on the top or bottom.

2. Think Up:
 176/243

How you hold yourself is a crucial part of

first impressions. Everything from your pos-
ture to how you carry yourself to the way
you’re angling your body contributes to
someone’s first impression of you. Often
simply being aware of your body language
can result in immediate improvements.
Another way to examine your body language
is to look at yourself on a video walking
around a room. When in doubt, think up.
Hold your head up, keep your shoulders up,
and stand straight up. These are the non-
verbal cues for confidence and strength.

3. Avoid bad days:

People who go to cocktail events or mixers

after having had a bad day typically continue
to have a bad day. If you are in a depressed
or anxious mood others will pick up on this
from your facial expressions, comments and
body language. If you’re having a bad day,
stay home! Otherwise find a way to snap
 177/243

yourself out of your bad mood. I find work-

ing out or watching funny YouTube videos
before events often gets me in a more social,
feel good mood.

4. Less Stuff:

Try to only carry one bag—not a briefcase

and a purse. Also remove outerwear and
hang it up before going into a party or inter-
view. The more you carry the more disorgan-
ized you appear to others.

Chapter 7: Special Areas

I give many examples in previous chapters
using nonverbal behavior in special situ-
ations such as business, dating and parent-
ing. Below I give a brief overview of some
tips for people in love, people in business,
human resource and sales as well as some
advice for public speakers.
 178/243

Interactions Between Men and Wo-

men: Dating, Romance and Love

Courtship is one of the most difficult and

nerve-ridden times of our lives. If you are
trying to meet the love of your life, or just
looking for a good time, body language can
change the way you interact. The tips below
will help give you an edge in the dating
scene.

Be sure to also check out my ebook on

lie detection and nonverbal behavior
for dating, romance and love at
ScienceofPeople.org.

Flirting Behavior

• Like Marilyn Monroe, women who are try-

ing to entice a man tend to raise their eye-
brows and lower their lids because it looks
similar to the face women make when they
orgasm.
 179/243

Looking up and to the side at a man is anoth-

er 'come •
hither' look from a woman to a man.

• Intimate gazing (looking at someone’s eyes,

mouth and body) as discussed in Chapter
Two often engages their attention and en-
courages them to like you in return.
• A sideways glance over a raised shoulder
highlights curves and the roundness of the
female face. This signifies estrogen and ex-
poses the vulnerability of the neck and re-
leases pheromones. Women instinctively do
this when trying to flirt.

Interesting Fact: Women pluck their

eyebrows higher up their forehead
because it makes them look more
helpless. This is attractive to men
because a women’s helplessness causes hor-
mone release in a man's brain
connected with protecting and defending the
female.
 180/243

•Women toss their hair or touch their neck

when flirting because it exposes the armpit,
which releases sex hormones, shows the
curvature of the neck and highlights shiny
healthy hair.

• A woman’s outer genitals are proportionate

to her lips. This is called self-mimicry and it
helps attract males. Women call attention to
their lips by wearing glossy or bright colored
lipstick.

• Oddly, a limp wrist or exposed wrists are a

sign of sexual submission and both women
and gay men tend to do this subconsciously
when in a room with people they want to at-
tract. This is why while smoking, many wo-
men hold the cigarette with one wrist turned
out and exposed.

Interesting Fact: Men lie to appear

more powerful, interesting, and suc-
cessful. They lie about themselves
 181/243

eight times more than they lie about

others. Women lie less about them-
selves and more to protect others feel-
ings or to make others feel better
about themselves.

Female Behavior:

Women are better at sending and picking up

body language cues than men. In fact re-
searcher Monika Moore found men often
miss a women's first eye-gazing courtship
signal. On average women need to eye-gaze
three times before a man takes notice.

In another study participants were asked to

decode a silent movie. Women were able to
guess what was happening 87% of the time,
but men could only guess correctly 42% of
the time. Interestingly gay men and men in
highly emotional jobs (nursing, teaching and
acting) did nearly as well as women.
 182/243

Women might be better at reading body lan-

guage because more of their brain is active
when they evaluate other’s behavior. When
in an MRI women have 14 to 16 active brain
areas while evaluating others, whereas men
only have 4 to 6 active.

Women with large eyes, a small nose, full

lips and high cheeks are seen by men as
more attractive because these features are
usually correlated with high levels of estro-
gen, which means the woman is more fertile.
In men, women like legs, butt, and chest and
arms. The majority of women favor a man’s
butt as her favorite male body part.

Male Behavior:

Men are not nearly as expressive as women.

In fact women make an average of six facial
expressions in 10 seconds, while men only
make two.
 183/243

It would be better if men were more express-

ive because men are perceived as charming
when they mirror their partner’s body lan-
guage—and women are the more expressive
sex. The more couples mirror each other; the
better they tend to get along. This is why
older couples begin to look alike— they mir-
ror each other’s facial expressions and there-
fore get the same wrinkles and muscle defin-
ition in their faces.

When men want to possess something (in-

cluding a woman) they tend to lean on, touch
or hold her. If you see a man drape his arm
across a woman’s shoulders or the back of
her chair—this is a possessive move.

The “ideal” man has a strong jaw, large eye-

brows and a strong nose because these cor-
relate with high levels of testosterone, which
for a woman, means he can better provide
for her. Most men are split equally between
liking a woman’s legs, butt or chest.
 184/243

Tips for Men and Women:

• When approaching a woman, men should

never come up to a woman from behind, as
this will put her on guard. They are better off
coming in at an angle and then standing at
an angle (see previous chapters on why this
is beneficial for connection).

• You do not need to have perfect looks to at-

tract a man. Studies show that men are more
attracted to a woman who engages in flirta-
tion behavior to show she is available over
the best-looking woman in the room.

Attractive Body Language:

Smiling
Having an expressive face
Keeping your hands below chin level (above
can be seen as aggressive or over-animated)
Minimal arm crossing
Keeping hands outside of pockets
Triple head nods to show interest
 185/243

Intimate eye gazing

Leaning towards the other person
Subtle mirroring

Interesting Fact: People are more

likely to lie and cheat in low lighting.
So beware of dark restaurants.

Business Body Language and Nonverbal

Behavior

Every single one of the tips from previous

chapters can be applied in the business en-
vironment. I want to point out some special
tips for those in business—whether you are
an entrepreneur, employer, employee, hu-
man resource director or manager.

Be sure to also check out my ebook on lie

detection and nonverbal behavior for
businesses on
ScienceofPeople.org.
 186/243

Interviewing:
Finding ideal employees can be a challenge.
There are some tactics you can use to make
interviews more successful.

• Always conduct interviews without a table.

If you must use a table using glass. This gives
you an unobstructed view of the subject’s
behavior.

• Sit angled from one another. Do not sit dir-

ectly facing each other. This causes animos-
ity and blocks recall.

•Always baseline someone before looking for

red flags. Keep in mind, no matter how
mundane your questions are, your inter-
viewee is most likely going to be nervous for
the whole interview so you will be probably
only be able to get a nervous baseline.

•If you see a lot of red flags, don’t hesitate to

schedule a second or even third interview.
 187/243

You might also have another colleague in the

room to get a second opinion on odd
behavior.

Sales:

I have a specific set of resources for sales

professionals on my website,
ScienceofPeople.org, but here are a few to get
you started:

• It is best to expose your palms and hands as

much as possible when dealing with poten-
tial customers. This shows you have nothing
to hide.

• If you see your prospect purse their lips,

they are withholding a potential worry or
piece of information. Counter this by build-
ing rapport. Get more information about
their needs and concerns before you go in for
your big ask.
 188/243

• Try not to pitch a prospect with a desk in

front of you. This immediately puts you on
opposing sides. Try to sit in angled chairs
next to each other.

• If you have to pitch a client over a meal,

don’t expect a decision at the table. The
brain loses blood flow as blood rushes to the
stomach to aid digestion, so is less able to
reason.

•Use nonverbal behaviors that show confid-

ence even when you are on the phone. The
moves inspire confidence for others but also
for yourself. Increased confidence translates
over the phone.

Confidence Gestures:
Steepling
189/243
 190/243

Steepling is a great gesture of confid-

ence—just lightly place the tips of your fin-
gers together.
Putting your elbows on your armrest
Putting your hands behind your back while
standing
Not crossing your arms
Taking up more, not less physical space
Planting your feet firmly on the ground
Public Speaking

Public speaking can be incredibly difficult.

By thinking about your body language as
well as your words, you will be able to con-
nect with your audience on a deeper level.

•Be careful not to point at your slides or the

audience. This is seen as aggressive behavior.
Instead squeeze your fingers together with
your thumb or use an open palm point.

•When looking out at the audience be sure to

use broad sweeping gestures with your eyes
 191/243

to make eye contact with everyone. Look at

both corners and the middle of the room re-
peatedly to reach all audience members.

•Researchers at the Wharton School of Busi-

ness found that during verbal presentations
students only retain about 10% of what is
said. So be sure to repeat key points and use
visual aids like power points or videos.

•Never say you are nervous when speaking!

The audience will then focus on finding evid-
ence of your nerves instead of listening to the
content of your presentation.

• Try to move beyond the lectern. Standing

behind the lectern the entire time makes it
look like you are hiding something -- the
audience cannot see the bottom half of your
body.
 192/243

Conclusion and Other

Resources:
Interpreting body language is an art based in
science. Research tells us what our bodies do
when we feel certain emotions. We have to
interpret and act upon that knowledge in our
own way.

It is important to remember there is no one

expression that means someone is lying.
Every behavior must be taken in context and
related to other clues.

Reading people also takes focus and concen-

tration. You cannot effectively read people
while looking at iPhones or multi-tasking.
Giving someone your full focus will not only
help you read them better, but will also show
them you are genuinely interested in
them—which is the best foundation for true
relationships and connection.
 193/243

Check out my website to get my free newslet-

ter with tips and tricks, videos and other re-
sources, including ebooks on body language
and nonverbal behavior in:

Business
Public Speakers, Presenters and Keynotes
How to Nail An Awesome Job
Human Resource Professionals
Entrepreneurs
Sales Female Body Language
Male Body Language
Doctors and Healthcare Professionals
Actors To download these ebooks visit:
ScienceofPeople.org
Appendix 1: Interview Tips
Everyone gets nervous for job interviews and
tries to prepare great responses to the inter-
viewers potential questions. But maybe what
you say is not as important as how you say
it...or what your body is saying during a job
interview.

Are you communicating all of your best traits

in an interview? What is your body language
and nonverbal behavior saying to the inter-
viewer? The tips below also work if you need
to give your son/spouse/best friend some
help before a job interview to help them feel
more confident and get the job, so feel free to
tear these out and give them to a friend.
 195/243

You can also email them this appendix, we

have the article at ScienceofPeople.org.
Here are a few tips to give you the ex-
tra nonverbal edge to get the job:
1. Have One Bag

This might sound crazy, but research has

found that when people carry more than one
item they look disorganized, messy and
scattered. If you are a man carry one
briefcase if you are a woman have one purse
with your notes or resume in the bag. Also,
jackets count. If possible have the reception-
ist or secretary take your coat and hat before
walking into the interview. This simple trick
is a nonverbal way to make you look more
sharp and put together.

2. Don't Forget the Back of Your

Shoes!

One study found that female interviewers

look at the back of a person's shoes in almost
 196/243

every interview -and this is the last impres-

sion you leave them with. So be sure you
have them buffed, not scuffed.

3. Smile Right

A lot of interview advice says that people

should smile more in interviews, but this is
not always a good idea. What’s better is to
smile right. People who smile too much are
actually perceived as submissive and weak!
Many studies have shown that people in pos-
itions of power actually do not smile much at
all but rather smile at the right time. You
want to smile when you first meet the person
and shake their hand, when you talk about
subjects you are passionate about and at the
end of the interview while saying goodbye.
This is especially important for females--
smiling too much because you are nervous or
trying to build rapport actually does the op-
posite, it makes females look less smart not
more friendly.
 197/243

4. Sit Right

If possible try to sit at a slight angle from the

interviewer. Our brains are funny organs, re-
search has shown that when we sit directly
across from someone we recall less of what
was said, we are more negative and feel they
are opposing us. Simply sitting at a slight
angle can change this automatic brain bias.

5. Don't Contract, Don't Expand

In an interview you want to take up the right

amount of space. When we are nervous we
tend to 'turtle' which is when you bring your
neck down and your shoulders up to take up
less space. We also try to make ourselves as
small as possible--women cross their legs,
men fold their arms over their chest. This
shows the interviewer you are insecure and
can make it look like you have something to
hide. So relax your arms, plant your feet and
don't let your body show your tension.
 198/243

Occasionally men will do the opposite, they

will try to claim territory by taking up as
much space as possible, draping an arm over
the couch or spreading legs wide while they
talk. This is very aggressive and will make
the other person taking subconscious (or
even conscious note) of the territorial move.

6. Start in the Parking Lot

When possible start all of your nonverbal

tips in the parking lot before you even enter
the building. There are two reasons for this:

• Bosses, colleagues, interviewers might see

you in the parking lot or in the elevator and
you only get one chance to make a first im-
pression. I have heard many stories of people
who were friendly in an elevator and that
person ended up being one of the people who
made a hiring decision.
 199/243

• Your body language builds your confidence.

Researcher Amy Cuddy has found that using
powerful, confident body language actually
causes you to feel more powerful. So you can
rev up your confident mental state by start-
ing early.

7. Loose Grip

When people are nervous they tend to grip

the arms of their chair or clench their fists at
their sides. This subconsciously sends the
signal that you are preparing for battle or are
defensive. Take deep breaths and keep your
hands loose and relaxed.
No matter what, go in and be yourself. When
you are not genuine, people pick up on it. So
take a deep breath, try to keep these tips in
mind and show 'em what you have to offer!
 200/243

Appendix 2:
Microexpressions
You are welcome to tear these out and bring
them with you to study.
Here are the seven universal facial microex-
pressions again:
1) Surprise:
Surprise is the briefest of emotions. It occurs
when the subject is shocked about something
said or done.
 201/243

-The brows are raised and curved—they

should look like upside-down U’s
-Skin below the brow is stretched
 202/243

-There can be horizontal wrinkles across the

forehead
-Eyelids are opened, with the white of the
eye showing above and below
-Jaw drops open and teeth are parted. The
lips, jaw and mouth stays loose
2) Fear:

Fear is shown when someone feels terror or

apprehension. This is easy to see in action if
you have the subject watch a horror movie.
 203/243

-Brows are raised and drawn together, usu-

ally in a flat line
-Wrinkles in the forehead are in the center
between the brows, not across
 204/243

-Upper eyelid is raised, but the lower lid is

tense and drawn up

-Upper eye has white showing, but not the

lower white
-Mouth is open and lips are slightly tensed or
stretched and drawn back

3) Disgust:
Disgust happens when someone feels repul-
sion or aversion.
 205/243

-Upper lip is raised

-Nose is wrinkled
-Cheeks are raised
-Lines show below the lower lid
 206/243

4) Anger:

Anger happens when someone feels rage or

extreme irritation.
I also have one of a man here so you can see
that even though the faces (and sexes) are
different, the same characteristics apply.
207/243
 208/243

-The brows are lowered and drawn together

-Vertical lines appear between the brows
-Lower lid is tensed

-Eyes hard stare or bulging

 209/243

-Lips can be pressed firmly together with

corners down or square shape as if shouting

-Nostrils may be dilated

-The lower jaw juts out
5) Happiness:

Happiness is the easiest emotion to fake be-

cause a smile comes naturally to us. You can
still discern true happiness or joy when you
see the muscles activated on the outside
corners of the eye (crows feet).
210/243
 211/243

-Corners of the lips are drawn back and up in

a smile
-Mouth may or may not be parted, teeth
exposed
-A crease runs from outer nose to outer lip
 212/243

-Cheeks are raised

-Lower lid may show wrinkles or be tense
-Crows feet near the outside of the eyes
6) Sadness:

Sadness, sorrow or unhappiness is the hard-

est emotion to fake. It is difficult to engage
the lips in a frown or pull the corners of your
eyebrows up without having a genuine feel-
ing of sadness.
 213/243

-Inner corners of the eyebrows are drawn up

-Corner of the lips are drawn down
-Jaw is drawn back
-Lower lip pouts out
7) Contempt or Hatred:

Contempt, disdain, scorn or hatred look very

similar to a smirk, and is often used as a
 214/243

pretense for being happy for someone to cov-

er up jealousy. It is a simple one-sided
mouth raise.
215/243
 216/243

Appendix 3: Lance Armstrong

As I have mentioned, watching the news and
television can be a great way to practice
reading nonverbal behavior. One recent ex-
ample is Lance Armstrong’s confessional in-
terview with Oprah.

We were all shocked to find out that Lance

Armstrong had been involved with illegal
substances throughout his seven Tour De
France wins. His interview with Oprah,
sadly, showed more anger, pride and defi-
ance than sadness and regret.

Overall, he did show some nerves, but very

little sadness— which is the emotion he
should have been feeling if he was truly sorry
for his cheating and lying. He also showed
anger at the accusations, contempt at the
questions, and defiance, which leads me to
 217/243

believe that he still thinks his actions were

justified.

Let’s look at Lance Armstrong’s specific body

language and microexpressions throughout
his first interview with Oprah to see what he
was really feeling.

1. The Confession:

As Armstrong answers Oprah’s direct ques-

tions about taking banned substances, there
is a distinct lack of sadness.
 218/243

In fact, the first real microexpression we see

is when Oprah asks Armstrong “Did you ever
take the banned substance EPO?” He an-
swers and then narrows his eyes in an-
ger—a small leak to his true feelings.

Oprah then asks him if he believes you need

banned substances to win the Tour De
France. He says yes and then smiles. This is
a clear explanation about why he was angry
at the EPO question--he believes you need to
dope to win.
 219/243

Immediately following the smile, he shows

contempt. Again, he is irritated that he is
being asked these questions.

Not only are sadness and sorrow

missing through-out the interview. His
body actually shows dominance. For ex-
ample, he is seated in the open leg cross.
This is the position Western cowboys sat in--
it signifies confidence and aggressiveness. It
also takes up more physical space than sit-
ting in a neutral position or a closed cross,
which is a way to claim territory.
 220/243

Another prideful gesture is when Armstrong

refers to himself in a traditional 'chest
pound' which only confident, alpha
males do. If he felt bad for his actions, he
would not be showing such dominant
behavior.

2. Why Now?

Oprah asks Armstrong about why he has

been telling lies up until now. Armstrong
says, "This story was so perfect for so long."
And then shows a small smile, which is also
known as duping delight. It pleases him
that he got away with the story for so long
and he liked it when it was perfect--of
course, he was doping, winning and getting
away with it.
 221/243

3. Doping Scheme

When Oprah asks Armstrong, "How did it all

work?" He pets and scratches his head for
longer than needed. This is one of his few
signs of nerves. Petting or scratching the
head is a nervous and self-soothing gesture.
Like a parent pats a child's head before bed,
we do this to calm ourselves down. I think he
was nervous about answering this question--
whether because he is ashamed or still hid-
ing something, I think is answered a little
later in the interview.
I do not believe that Armstrong feels re-
morse or guilt for his doping. Not only does
he say in the beginning that he believes you
need the drugs to win, but when he says to
 222/243

Oprah, "My cocktail was only..." Using the

word only implies he still does not think that
what he did was that bad. He also flat out
says he justifies taking testosterone because
of his cancer.

The final evidence for Armstrong's lack of re-

morse is when he is explaining the 'genera-
tion of doping' and says, "I didn't create it,
but I didn't stop it. And that's what I have to
feel sorry for," and then does a one sided
shoulder shrug--one of the most typical body
language leaks of liars. I do not believe he
feels sorry at all.

4. Anger and Holding Back

Through out the interview Armstrong purses

his lips together and raises his chin. This has
a double meaning, first pursing your lips
usually means you are withholding informa-
tion. Since I believe Armstrong feels justified
in his actions, I believe he is holding back all
 223/243

of his justifications for what he did. And the

chin raise is part of the microexpression for
anger. I think he is angry that he has been
caught and having to answer the questions.

5. Suing Shame

The one time I think Armstrong shows

shame is when he is talking about suing
people who he knew were telling the truth.
Not only does he touch his face much more
during this segment--a self comforting ges-
ture we do when we are nervous.

But he also uses distancing language because

I think he is ashamed. He says, "It's a major
flaw. It's a guy who expected to get whatever
 224/243

he wanted and to control every outcome." He

refers to himself in the third person because
I think he is ashamed he did it and wants to
distance himself from those actions.

6. Contempt At Recklessness

Armstrong shows great contempt at his reck-

less period. Whether this is because he re-
grets his behavior, or because he regrets be-
ing reckless which led to him being caught--
we can only guess. From other clues in the
interview, I would say he is more regretful of
being caught.
Lance Armstrong's body language does not
match his verbal content. I think his lies
caught up to him and he is confessing and
saying sorry because he has to.
 225/243

Appendix 4: Colors
Nonverbal behavior does not only have to do with the body, the colors
your wear also tell the world (and yourself) something about you.
Can the color you wear really affect your
mood? Research says yes; color can abso-
lutely affect your mood, behavior and stress
levels.

Color specialist Leatrice Eiseman says how

colors affect us correlates to that colors be-
havior in nature. Eiseman has asked thou-
sands of people what they think of specific
colors and has found many patterns. She ex-
plains, "We have a repository of information
about a color. For example, the color blue is
almost always associated with blue skies,
which when we are children is a positive
thing -- it means playing outside and fun.
Evolutionarily it also means there are no
storms to come. This is why it is reminds us
of stability and calm."
 226/243

She cautions that there are no magic bullet

answers, but there are generalities that can
be gleaned from decades of research on the
patterns of what people think about each col-
or. So, how can you pick the perfect color for
each situation? Based on the research, here
is your personal color guide:

What Color Should You Make Your

Desktop: Green

What color you choose for your desktop and

the colors you choose for your website can
greatly affect your productivity. The color
green is restful for eyes and produces the
least amount of eyestrain. This is a good
choice for computer desktops if you are in
front of a screen for many hours.

What Color to Wear for a Work Out:

Orange
 227/243

Orange is a color of stimulation and enthusi-

asm. Orange is a nice mix of red's passion
and yellow's joy. Research has found that or-
ange increases oxygen supply to the brain,
produces an energizing effect, and stimulates
brain activity.

What Color to Wear on a Date (if

you're a woman): Red
Red is the color of passion and gets blood
pumping. Women can wear this to get their
date's heart racing.
What Color to Wear on a Date (if
you're a man): Blue

Blue is the most stable color. Women love

seeing stable men. It is also calming and can
help relax both you and your date's nerves.

What to Wear If You Want to Be Seen

As Aggressive: Black
 228/243

Researchers examined statistics from more

than 52,000 National Hockey League games
and found that teams were penalized more
for aggression while wearing black jerseys.
(Hockey teams have two color jerseys and
switch for home and away games). Interest-
ingly, the NHL in 2003 changed it's jersey
policy so that home teams had to wear white.
The authors of the study compared the sets
of data and found that the same teams were
assessed significantly more penalties for ag-
gression when they wore the black jerseys
than when they wore white.

What Colors Should You Paint Your

Office: Blue and Green

In 1999, researchers at Creighton University

found that colors significantly influence em-
ployees' emotions and efficiency. Workers in
blue offices felt the most centered, calm and
hopeful towards their work. Since blue can
lower heart rates and green reduces anxiety
 229/243

and is associated with money, a combination

of blue and green is best for the workplace.

What Color You Should Never Wear to

Work: Grey

Grey inspires people to be passive, unin-

volved and have a lack of energy. If you like
wearing grey, pairing it with a brighter color
will help offset the effect.

Choosing the color of your office, your

clothes or your desktop should not be taken
lightly -- colors do affect our moods and pro-
ductivity. However, colors are not the only
thing that affects us -- one can still be effi-
cient in a grey suit or workout well in a black
outfit. But, when given the choice, picking a
color that will work with you, and not against
you can only help.
 230/243

Appendix 5: The Best

Websites on Human Lie
Detection
I love writing and researching human lie de-
tection, nonverbal communication and hu-
man behavior, but I also have an amazing
community of fellow authors and writers
with my passion and I wanted to give them a
shout out.

Here are my favorite authors and blogs on

human lie detection and nonverbal behavior:
1. Eyes for Lies

The writer of Eyes for Lies, Renee is a profes-

sional deception and credibility expert. She
teaches law
enforcement in her courses and has a fant-
astic blog of resources. Her track record is
particularly impressive–where she logs liars
 231/243

she has caught before the truth was

discovered.

2. Liespotting

Pamela Meyer writes Liespotting the blog

and has just come out with her book which is
fantastic. She also has podcasts and videos
on her website, which are full of helpful
insights.

3. Paul Ekman

Paul Ekman not only writes about nonverbal

behavior but has really led the research in
this area. His studies and books are ground-
breaking and delve deep into both lie detec-
tion and nonverbal behavior–no light read-
ing found here!

You can also see his blog about the TV Show

Lie to Me where he talks about the real sci-
ence in each episode.
 232/243

4. Science of People.org

Our blog takes some of the best research on

human lie detection, nonverbal communica-
tion and human behavior from around the
world and puts it into easy to understand
articles and videos for our readers.

5. Joe Navarro
Joe’s book What Every BODY Is Saying is a
great overview of nonverbal communication
and the body.
6. Spying for Lying

Spying for Lying always has very current and

up to date videos and commentary on news
coverage. It’s a great way to stay up on
what’s happening in the nonverbal world.

7. Statement Analysis
 233/243

Mark McClish has this informative website

about lying and nonverbal behavior. His
news videos are also very informative.

8. Kevin Hogan

Kevin Hogan is a body language expert and

has many articles (as well as workshops) on
nonverbal behavior and communication.

9. The Political Lie Detector

This is a really interesting angle on lie detec-

tion and focuses more on the political sides
of things. They take the public pulse by dis-
tributing polls, quizzes, and surveys to users.

Citations
Navarro, Joe, and Marvin Karlins. What
Every BODY Is Saying: An Ex-FBI Agent's
Guide to Speed-reading People. New York,
NY: Collins Living, 2008.
 234/243

Ekman, Paul. Telling Lies: Clues to Deceit in

the Marketplace, Politics, and Marriage.
New York: Norton, 1985.

Pease, Allan, and Barbara Pease. The Definit-

ive Book of Body Language. New York: Ban-
tam, 2006.
Meyer, Pamela. Liespotting: Proven Tech-
niques to Detect Deception. New York: St.
Martin's, 2010.
Craig, David. Lie Catcher: Become a Human
Lie Detector in under 60 Minutes. Newport,
N.S.W.: Big Sky, 2011.
Aldert Vrij. Detecting Lies and Deceit.
(Chichester England: John Wiley & Sons,
2000) 93-100.

Mark deTurck, “Training Observers to Detect

Spontaneous Deception: Effects of Gender,”
Communication Reports 4 (Summer 1991):
81-89.
 235/243

K. Fiedler and I. Walka, “Training Lie

Detectors to Use Nonverbal Cues Instead of
Global Heuristics,” Human Communication
Research 20 (December 1993): 199-223.

T. A. Russell, E. Chu, and M. L. Phillips, “A

Pilot Study to Investigate the Effectiveness of
Emotion Recognition Remediation in
Schizophrenia Using the Micro-Expression
Training Tool,” British Journal of Clinical
Psychology 45 (2006): 579-583.
James Geary, “How to Spot a Liar,” Time
Magazine Europe, March 2000.

Robert S. Feldman, James A. Forrest, and

Benjamin R. Happ, “Self-Presentation and
Verbal Deception: Do Self-Presenters Lie
More?,” Journal of Basic and Applied Social
Psychology 24, no. 2 (June 2002): 163-170.

Coalition Against Insurance Fraud, “Go Fig-

ure: Fraud Data,” http://www.insureance-
fraud.org/consumerattitudes.htm
 236/243

Jeffrey Kluger, “Pumping Up Your Past,”

Time, June 2, 2002.
http://www.time.com/time/magazine/art-
icle/0,9171,1101020 610-257116,00.htm

http://www.highbeam.com/doc/
1G1-90099018.html. Ernst & Young LLP,
Aldert Vrij. Detecting Lies and Deceit.
(Chichester England: John Wiley & Sons,
2000) 93-100.

Bella DePaulo, Deborah Kashy, Susan Kiren-

dol, Melissa Wyer, “Lying in Everyday Life,”
Journal of Personality and Social Psycho-
logy 70, no. 5 (May 1996): 979-995.

Association of Certified Fraud Examiners,

“2008 Report to the Nation on Occupational
Fraud Abuse,” 4.
Driver, Janine. You Can't Lie to Me. Harper
One, 2012.
 237/243

R. B. Lount Jr., C. B. Zhong, N. Sivanathan,

and J.K. Murnighan, “Getting Off on the
Wrong Foot: The Timing of Breach and Res-
toration of Trust,” Personality and Social
Psychology Bulletin 34 (December 2008):
1601-12. DePaulo et al. “Lying in Everyday
Life.”

C. B. Zhong, V. K. Bohns, and F. Gino, “Good

Lamps Are the Best Police: Darkness In-
creases Dishonesty and SelfInterested Beha-
vior,” Psychological Science 21 (March
2010): 311-14.

L. Shu et al., “When to Sign on the Dotted

Line? Signing First Makes Ethics Salient and
Decreases Dishonest SelfFirst Makes Ethics
Salient and Decreases Dishonest Self 117,
2011).

P. Fraccaro et al., “Experimental Evidence

That Women Speak in a Higher Voice Pitch
to Men They Find Attractive,” Journal of
 238/243

Evolutionary Psychology (March 2011):

57-67

D. Larcher and A. Zakolyukina, “Detecting

Deceptive Discussions in Conference Calls”
(working paper no. 83, Rock Center for Cor-
porate Governance, Stanford, CA, July 29,
2010).

J. Shafer, “Reading People by the Words

They Speak,” June 17, 2011, http://www.psy-
chologytoday.com.

J. Hancock et al., “Hungry Like the Wolf: A

Word-Pattern Analysis of the Language of
Psychopaths,” Legal and Criminological
Psychology, September 14, 2011.

Pennebaker, James W. Secret Life of Pro-

nouns. 2011
Dresbold, Michelle. Sex, Lies and Handwrit-
ing. 2008
 239/243

N. Ambady, J. Koo, R. Rosenthal, and C. H.

Winograd, “Physical Therapists’ Nonverbal
Communication Predicts Geriatric Patients
Health Outcomes,” Psychology and Aging 17
(September 2002): 443-52.
M. Bennett, “Who’s Lying?” University of
California First Annual Compliance and
Audit Symposium, San Francisco, February
2009.

Z. Hussain, A. B. Sekuler, and P. J. Bennett,

“Superior Identification of Familiar Visual
Patterns a Year After Learning,” Psycholo-
gical Science 22 (June 2011): 724-30.

D. Matsumoto, H.S. Hwang, L. Skinner, and

M. Frank, “Evaluating Truthfulness and
Detecting Deception,” FBI Law Enforcement
Bulletin, June 2011.

K. J. Haley and D. M. T. Fessler, “Nobody’s

Watching? Subtle Cues Affect Generosity in
 240/243

an Anonymous Economic Game,” Evolution

and Human Behavior 26 (2005): 245-56.

G. A. Van Kleef et al., “Breaking the Rules to

Rise to Power: How Norm Violators Gain
Power in the Eyes of Others,” Social Psycho-
logical and Personality Science (September
2011): 500-507.

A. D. Evans and K. Lee, “Promising to Tell

the Truth Makes 8 to 16 Year-Olds More
Honest,” Behavioral Sciences & The Law 28
(November – December 2010): 801-11.

J. Kuroyama, C. Wright, T. Manson, and C.

Sablynski, “The Effect of Warning Against
Faking on Noncognitive Test Outcomes: A
Field Study of Bus Operator Applicants,” Ap-
plied H.R.M Research 12 (2010): 59-74.

M. Hartwig et al., “Strategic Use of Evidence

During Police Interviews,” Law and Human
Behavior 30 (2006): 603-19.
 241/243

S. Krach et al., “Your Flaws Are My Pain:

Linking Empathy to Vicarious Embarrass-
ment,” PLoS One 6 (April 13, 2011) D. Car-
ney et al., “Power Posing: Brief Nonverbal
Displays Affect Neuroendocrine Levels and
Risk Tolerance,” Psychological Science.

Huston, Philip, Michael Floyd and Susan

Carnicero. “Spy the Lie.” St Martin’s Press:
New York, 2012.
Jacobs, Keith W. and Frank G. Hustmyer Jr. (1974), "Effects of Four
Psychological Primary Colors on GSR, Heart Rate and Respiration
Rate," Perceptual and Motor Skills, 38, 763-66.

Color Wheel Pro. Accessed: October 31, 2012. http://www.color-

wheelpro.com/
University of Hawaii at Hilo; The Psychology of Color; Kalyan N. Meola;
2005

"Effects of Office Interior Color on Worker's Mood and Productivity."

Nancy K Wallek, Carol M. Lewis, and Ann S. Robbins. Perceptual and
Motor Skills, 1988, 66, 123-128.

Birren, F. (1978). Color & Human Response. New York: John Wiley &
Sons. Inc.
Mahnke, F. (1996). Color, environment and human response. New York:
Wiley.
Mahnke, R. & Mahnke, F. (1993). Color and Light 1993. New York: John
Wiley & Sons.
 242/243
Webster, G., Urland, G., & Correll, J. (2011). Can Uniform Color Color
Aggression? Quasi-Experimental Evidence From Professional Ice
Hockey Social Psychological and Personality Science, 3 (3), 274-281
DOI: 10.1177/1948550611418535

Notes:
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