The Best Way To Deal With Embarrassment: Research Identifies The Most Successful Ways To Defuse Awkward Situations

Susan Krauss Whitbourne Ph.D.
Fulfillment at Any Age
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The Best Way to Deal With

Embarrassment
Research identifies the most successful ways to defuse
awkward situations.
Posted Dec 23, 2014
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It’s happened to everyone at some point or another: You’ve forgotten to zip
up a piece of clothing. There’s food between your teeth. Your body has let
out an unfortunate noise. Or you’ve spilled something on yourself and
everyone around you. There’s nothing you can do to undo the situation,
even though you might wish you could turn back the embarrassing hands
of time.
Whether you’re a repeat offender or only occasionally have these “oops”
moments, it would be helpful to know to extricate yourself
from embarrassment. Fortunately, a study by John Jay College professor
Joshua Clegg (2012) provides some guidance. Defining a socially
awkward situations as “problematic instances of social affiliation,” Clegg
bases his work on the theory that most people have a need to belong.
This desire for affiliation leads us to engage in self-regulation, in which we
are constantly on the lookout to see what other people think about us.
When we think that people are evaluating us negatively, our sense of
self takes a huge hit.
To gain insight into the experience of feeling socially awkward, Clegg

undertook what’s called a “narrative” study, in which he and his
research team asked participants to report in depth about a particular
instance. The researchers used a semi-structured interview that allowed
participants the freedom to describe their experiences but also provided
some guidance so that the responses would be interpretable across
participants.
Clegg and his team discussed each of the responses, searching for
common themes. The participants included undergraduates as well as
people from a range of ages and walks of life, including a man in his
90s. The goal was to go in-depth in the respondents' narratives, rather
than to count proportions, as is done in other surveys. Thus, the findings
are particularly helpful in gaining an inside look into the experience of
social awkwardness.
Tense or uncertain social situations were the first type of awkwardness

that Clegg and his team identified. These could be sudden (as when
you drop or spill something) but often are ones that you expect ahead of
time to be awkward. For example, Clegg described the experience of
“meeting the parents” of one’s significant other. In general, the less you
know what to expect about a situation, the more you anticipate it to be
awkward. If you’re lucky, though, the situation doesn’t turn out as badly
as you expected, so the awkwardness is never realized.
Awkwardness may also take the form of a perceived transgression. For

example, you say or do something that goes over the boundaries of
taste or propriety. You might, for instance, make a joke about someone
you don’t know very well but only realize after you’ve blurted out the
comment that it went too far. It’s awkward not only to commit a social
transgression like this, but to be part of a group in which it’s done by
someone else.
During an awkward moment, you’re likely to feel intense focusing of

social attention. Time may seem to slow or stop, as in your mind (and
possibly in reality), you’ve become the target of everyone’s gaze. You
feel anxious and embarrassed, and perhaps even experience sweaty
palms and heart palpitations. Although some individuals enjoy being the
center of attention, particularly those high in narcissism, after committing
a social transgression, the feeling that others are staring is typically
uncomfortable during or following an awkward moment.
Once you start to feel awkward, the chances are that you’ll behave in
ways that become even more awkward. Your anxiety may lead you
to laugh anxiously, speak in a wavering tone of voice, look
uncomfortable, and blush or stammer. At the same time, other people in
the room may themselves feel an empathic kind of awkwardness. They
think about what it might be like if the awkward thing happened to them,
but also might feel that your behavior makes them look bad. What if you
bring a friend to a party and the friend spills soda all over herself? You
might be glad that at least none of it got on you, but you might also feel
that everyone else will judge you as clumsy, too, because it was your
friend.
Now that we’ve looked at the anatomy of an awkward situation, let’s

move on to see how the participants in the Clegg study resolved their
feelings of anxiety and discomfort. First, Clegg and his team noted that
the participants were anxious to make it all go away as fast as possible.
As one participant stated, “I felt like the longer I let it sit, the more it
would fester and just be uncomfortable and leave a bad taste in
everybody’s mouth” (p. 270).
When you’ve committed an awkward act, there are two broad

alternatives: Pretend it didn’t happen (avoidance) or confront it directly.
Comedian Chevy Chase, in his early days, was the master of launching
a grand pratfall from which he jumped up and moved on as if nothing
had occurred. It may be funny for a comedian to commit such a faux
pas, but when it happens to you, there’s nothing humorous about it. In
an avoidant response, you try to distance yourself from the situation by
averting your gaze, or you might just get out and leave during the first
opportunity.
Unfortunately, by pretending something bad didn’thappen, you don’t

make it go away. You might decide that since there’s nothing you can
do, it is best to forget it and move on, but at least in some people’s
minds, it’s not been resolved. One example Clegg provides is of a
young woman in a pool whose swimsuit had come off. Obviously, she
was embarrassed, but rather than own up to her feelings, she just swam
away as quickly as possible, hoping that no one noticed (though of
course they did).
ARTICLE CONTINUES AFTER ADVERTISEMENT

A much better strategy for resolving awkwardness is confronting it
directly. In most cases that Clegg investigated, the situation was
resolved best through humor. This has to apply to you when you’re the
one who’s committed the awkward act. You won’t gain friendsif you use
humor to make fun of their awkwardness. However, your friends will feel
a lot better about the situation and probably admire you for your
courage when you own up to a social transgression. You don’t have to
be a professional comedian to know how to use humor in an awkward
situation. Even saying “awkward!” can do the trick.
Because everyone has moments of awkwardness, there’s no point in

imagining that you can be immune from them. Instead, by showing that
you’re able to handle the discomfort and move on, you will minimize
their effects on the way others view you—and how you view yourself.
Follow me on Twitter @swhitbo for daily updates on psychology, health,

and aging. Feel free to join my Facebook group, "Fulfillment at Any Age," to
discuss today's blog, or to ask further questions about this posting.
How to deal with embarrassing situations

Study shows that putting yourself in the position of an observer could be
key to overcoming feelings of embarrassment
Date:
March 27, 2018
Source:
Springer
Summary:
Feelings of embarrassment can be overcome through mental training. By training
your mind to be an observer rather than actively participating in the embarrassing
situation it is possible overcome humiliating or distressing feelings, says the author of
a new study.
Share:
FULL STORY
Feelings of embarrassment can be overcome through mental training.

This is the finding of a study published in Springer's journal Motivation
and Emotion. By training your mind to be an observer rather than
actively participating in the embarrassing situation it is possible
overcome humiliating or distressing feelings, says Li Jiang of Carnegie
Mellon University in the US who led the study.
Some people have such an intense fear of embarrassment that they go to great lengths to
sidestep seemingly everyday situations. This could include not asking a shop assistant a
question about a new product, for fear of sounding stupid, or not taking an embarrassing yet
potentially life-saving medical test.
"Embarrassment prevents us from asking advice about what we should do, for example,
about our mounting mortgage bills or unplanned pregnancies. In many cases, if we are to
help ourselves, and others, we must overcome our fear of embarrassment in social
situations," explains Jiang.
Jiang and her colleagues conducted three sets of studies, each involving different groups of
students from a large university in the US. In the first study, the researchers asked
participants to respond to an advertisement showing someone accidentally farting in a yoga
class. The second study tested participants' reactions to an advertisement about getting
tested for sexually transmitted diseases. The third study questioned participants about an
advertisement where a man accidentally farts in front of a potential love interest. In each
study, the researchers wanted to test the hypothesis that adopting an observer's perspective
can reduce feelings of embarrassment.
One of the findings was that people who are extremely self-conscious in public are more
likely to take an actor's perspective in an embarrassing situation, even if this concerns
others. Self-conscious people will even feel distressed when watching an advertisement with
an embarrassment appeal. However, levels of self-consciousness drop in these people when
they are able to picture themselves as observers of a situation, and not as being directly
involved in it.
"Our research shows that devising strategies to successfully reduce embarrassment
avoidance is complicated. This is because consumers will react differently to persuasion
tactics depending on their level of public self-consciousness and their amount of available
cognitive resources," adds Jiang.
She believes the results have significant implications for marketers who often use potentially
embarrassing situations in their advertisements to entice consumers to buy their products.
"Embarrassment-avoidance forms the basis for attempts to motivate consumers to buy a
wide variety of products, from laundry detergents that can resolve rings around someone's
collar, to dishwasher liquid that can remove unsightly spots on dishes," explains Jiang. "Our
research is relevant to those situations in which marketers want to inoculate consumers
against a fear of embarrassment and encourage them to take actions they might otherwise
avoid."
Story Source:
Materials provided by Springer. Note: Content may be edited for style and length.
Don't show it
Hiding your feelings in order to save face can be the best way of defusing an
embarrassing situation.
Acknowledging feelings of humiliation will only make the people around you
feel awkward. It is an awareness of this that prompts people to jump up from
painful falls, slips and stumbles as if nothing has happened. While it is difficult
to mask some physical indications of embarrassment, such as blushing,
stammering and sweating, keeping your head held high, your back straight, and
maintaining eye contact will help you to look confident.
Don't beat yourself up
Even if something utterly mortifying happens to you, see it for what it is – an

isolated embarrassing incident. While it is natural to feel a wave of shame pass
over you, don't drown in it. It is also important not to let one humiliation feed
into a negative thought process – spilling coffee down your shirt before an
important business meeting or making a terrible joke in front of someone you
fancy does not make you an unlovable mess, for example.
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high-rise hotel in Indian capital
Avoid reliving it
No good can come of thinking over past embarrassments. The mind has
masochistic tendencies and, left unchecked, often embellishes humiliating
escapades until they become much worse than they actually were. Unlike
celebrities, whose embarrassments are routinely recorded for posterity, we
civilians can – and should – forget any cringe-making moments.
Laugh it off
A good way of taking the sting out of things is to laugh at ourselves. When we
are humiliated, it is usually because something has stripped away our away our
pride and pretensions, revealing the bumbling human beneath. While no-one
wants to live in a continual state of mortification, this occasional humbling
stops us taking ourselves too seriously.
How to Deal With an
Embarrassing Situation,
According to Science
Peechaya Burroughs for TIME
By JAMIE DUCHARME
March 29, 2018

When you do something embarrassing, you probably wish you were
someone — anyone — else.
But new research says that’s not just an instinctual reaction: It’s
actually a good strategy for dealing with cringe-worthy moments.
A new study published in the journal Motivation and Emotion says

that picturing yourself as an observer of the gaffe, rather than a
participant, may minimize distress. “It’s [about] detaching yourself
from this embarrassing situation and realizing observers won’t judge
you harshly,” explains Li Jiang, one of the study’s authors and a
researcher at Carnegie Mellon University’s Center for Behavioral and
Decision Research.
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The trick, however, is to look at yourself as a truly anonymous
observer — not from another person’s perspective, Jiang says. Taking
on the profile of a third-party observer is more powerful, she says,
because it provides more distance from the situation.
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In one experiment included in the study, 107 university students were

told that researchers were looking for volunteers to discuss how
doctors could improve communications regarding sensitive health
issues such as sexually transmitted infections. Participants then took
one of two surveys. One version first asked how likely they were to
volunteer for the study and how they would expect to feel during the
session — which would involve answering personal questions — then
about how they would expect the researchers to feel toward them.
The second version asked the same questions in the opposite order,
forcing respondents to consider the researchers’ thought processes
before their own. People most prone to embarrassment (as measured
by responses to a self-consciousness test) were more likely to say
they’d participate if they had taken the second survey, the researchers
found — suggesting that framing the situation through the eyes of an
observer made a difference.
In another experiment, 220 undergraduate students were asked to
provide feedback about an advertisement for an anti-flatulence
product that depicted a man passing gas in front of his crush. One
group read ad copy that only highlighted how embarrassing the
situation was, while a second group read additional text saying things
like, “Others will know what it’s like” and, “Put yourself in their
shoes.” The people in the study were then asked how likely they would
be to purchase the anti-gas product.
Embarrassment-prone people who read the version that included the

observer’s perspective were less likely to buy the anti-gas product,
compared to high-embarrassment peers who read the other version —
suggesting that reframing the issue may reduce embarrassment
avoidance.
This strategy isn’t foolproof. In fact, in the study, the people who were
the least likely to get embarrassed and who read the observer’s version
actually became more likely to buy the product, a finding that
surprised Jiang. “It tells us that, for any intervention, especially in
helping people to counter embarrassment, we need to take into
account the variations and individual differences,” Jiang says. “It
won’t work for all people.”
But embarrassment can have more serious consequences than just

momentary discomfort, so finding new strategies to combat it is
crucial, says Jiang. Imagine if you wanted to apply for a mortgage, but
you didn’t know how it worked, and you were too embarrassed to ask.
“This will lead to suboptimal decisions,” Jiang says. “In medical tests,
sometimes people feel too embarrassed to disclose certain kinds of
information; this will lead to suboptimal outcomes, and sometimes is
life-threatening.”
Given the possible negative consequences, Jiang says, it’s important to

find ways to curtail embarrassment avoidance. And getting some
distance from an embarrassing moment might do the trick.
6 Ways To Move Past An Embarrassing

Moment
By RAVEN ISHAK
Apr 13 2016
You can probably ask every single one of your friends what their most
embarrassing moment is and they'll most likely think of it in under five seconds.
While that awkward feeling is something no one ever wants to experience, there
are ways to help move past an embarrassing moment. As you're reading this
article, you're probably thinking about your most embarrassing memory and
cringing in your seat, recalling every single detail. While you're reliving that
moment in your head, you might not realize that every person has one thing in
common when it comes to those not-so-fun situations: Their embarrassing
moments are in the past.
Every person you know has probably dealt with a super awkward moment, but
they also probably overcame it in some way — or just forgot about it. So what's
the big deal when it comes to being embarrassed when you already know the
moment is not going to last forever? Even though we may be aware of this, it's
still not easy to go through, because when it does happen, it feels like time has
slowed down, people are starring at you, and breathing normally is difficult. Yes,
being embarrassed might feel like the end of the world in the moment, but there
are ways to overcome this stressful emotion. Below are just a few tips that will
hopefully help you view each situation as a mere moment in time, rather than a
world-shattering embarrassment.
1. Confront The Moment
Giphy
The most important thing you want to do when dealing with an embarrassing
situation is to directly address it the exact moment when it happens. While
running away in another direction as fast as you can may sound like a better
idea, this may actually making the situation way worse. According to Psychology
Today, using humor is a great way to alleviate any type of social stress you might
be feeling from an awkward moment. Laugh it off, make a joke, or do a funny

gesture; as long as you're showing that you're nonchalant about the whole thing,
the people around you may feel less awkward, too.
2. Apologize, But Not Too Much
Giphy
I feel like there are two types of people in the world when it comes to being
embarrassed: A person who overly apologizes and a person who DGAF. If you're
anything like me, you're the type of person who apologizes until their last dying
breath. But excessively saying sorry can become exasperating very quickly.
While it might seem sweet at first, you're actually not allowing yourself to move
past the embarrassing situation. According to PsychCentral, apologizing for the
awkward momentmay only make you feel worse because you're focusing on
what happened in the past and not on the present. Try to realize that you don't
owe anyone an apology for your embarrassing moment. Pick yourself up, wipe
off the stress, and move forward.
3. Focus On The Context Of The Memory
Giphy
Have you ever had an embarrassing situation happen to you and you couldn't
stop obsessing over it? "Why did I do that? I want to runaway." may be a few
thoughts you have as you replay the awkward event over and over again — but
you shouldn't focus on the negative. According to The Huffington Post, when you
only concentrate on what went wrong, you're actually heightening those
unwanted emotions. Rather than focusing on the bad, pay attention to the
context of the memory. This may allow you to relive the event without
suppressing it and steer your attention to other aspects of the situation.
“If the tendency is to go back to the emotional aspects of the memories, the idea
is to switch your attention to the non-emotional details and reduce the intensity
with less effort,” said Ekaterina Denkova, Ph.D. in the same Huffington Post
article. The next time you're replaying an embarrassing moment, focus on things
like what color shirt you were wearing or what the weather was like. These little
details may seem like nothing, but thinking about them may help you not relive
the negative.
4. Talk It Out With Someone
Giphy
Sometimes you can't get out of your head and just need to talk to someone.
According to How Stuff Works, keeping an embarrassing moment to yourself can
actually increase insecure emotions, or worse, may even lead to feelings of
shame. Ask a close friend if you can talk to them. By discussing the details of
your awkward situation, you may feel better because you're confiding in someone
you trust while you're airing out your dirty laundry. Plus, you never know, your
friend might give you a new perspective to the situation and help you see a
positive twist to a negative moment.
5. Allow Yourself To Be Imperfect
Giphy
Instead of beating yourself up over and over again, take a moment to laugh it off
and learn to accept your imperfections. According to The Huffington Post, being
embarrassed essentially comes from not living up to your own standards. If
you're too hard on yourself, you may never learn how to have fun and let go.
Give yourself some room to breathe. Everyone gets embarrassed; what really
matters is how you choose to deal with those awkward moments.
6. Stop Worrying About What Others Think Of You
If you're feeling awkward about a situation, it's probably because you don't want
others to think badly about you. But who cares what other people think?
According to Fast Company, workplace psychology coach Melody J. Wilding
said, "As human beings with egos and an innate self-awareness of our own
feelings, actions, and thoughts, we tend to notice and greatly exaggerate our
flaws while assuming everyone around us has a microscope focused on faults,
mistakes, and slip-ups." In reality, most people don't notice half the things we
worry about. Instead of stressing over what other people think, embrace the
embarrassing moment by laughing it off and forgetting about it.

It's completely natural to be embarrassed sometimes. It happens to everyone
because, let's face it, no one is perfect. But it seems that once an embarrassing
moment does happen, sometimes it feels like your whole world is crashing down
and time comes to a complete stop. Instead of cursing the heavens above, you
can easily overcome this moment by focusing on the context of the memory,
confronting the situation, and honestly, just not caring what people think. Before
you know it, you probably won't even be thinking about it anymore.
How to Deal With an

Embarrassing Moment
Co-authored by Tasha Rube, LMSW
In this Article:Responding When You're EmbarrassedAddressing Your Thoughts and FeelingsNavigating
Others' EmbarrassmentCommunity Q&A16 References
Being the unwanted center of attention is not a fun experience, especially if you
did something that makes you feel embarrassed. Even being around someone
who is embarrassed can be uncomfortable. You may feel hot, sweaty, and like
hiding or curling up into the fetal position. Luckily there are better ways to deal
with embarrassment than that. Keep in mind that showing embarrassment after a
transgression actually makes you look sincerely apologetic and trustworthy. So,
amidst all the awkwardness, embarrassment isn't all bad but serves important
social functions.[1][2]
Part1
Responding When You're Embarrassed
1.
1
Apologize when appropriate. If you're embarrassed by something you did to
someone else, say you're sorry and be genuine about it. That said, don't draw it
out. Let her know you're truly sorry about what you did but don't perseverate on
it.[3]
 For example, if you called her by the wrong name you might say something like:
"I'm really sorry about that, I've been really worried about Sarah lately; I guess
she's just on my mind a lot right now."
2.
2
Laugh it off. Minimize how embarrassing the moment is by laughing at yourself.
Embarrassing moments can be funny when they are light-hearted. If you let
yourself laugh at the situation, it loses its power over you.[4]
 To laugh it off, try creating a joke out of the situation. For example, if you spilled
mustard all over your shirt and you're feeling embarrassed about it you might say
"now all I need is a giant hot dog."
3.
3
Quickly move past it. People have short attention spans. There's no need to
draw the moment out for a long time. Change the subject in a fluid way to focus
attention on something different. Avoid apologizing excessively if you did
something embarrassing that requires an apology.[5]
 Changing subjects without making it awkward can be tricky: the best way to do
so will depend highly on the specific circumstances you find yourself in. Here is
an example you can keep in mind and adapt to the specific circumstances you
find yourself in. Imagine you become embarrassed about something while
planning a movie night out. To change subjects, you might ask a question, such
as, "I thought you had seen that movie already? What did you think about it? Is it
worth seeing again?" This will draw attention away from the embarrassing thing
you did toward something more germane.
4.
4
Minimize the incident.[6] Remind others that people do embarrassing things all
the time and that it isn't really a big deal.
 For example, say you tripped and fell in front of others. You might remind people
this happens from time to time to lots of people, while keeping things light, by
saying: "and another one bites the dust." If someone is rude to you while you're
joking around, then ignore them.
5.
5
Put embarrassment in others' court. If you've done something embarrassing,
one way to deal with it is by asking others about things they have done in the
past that they were embarrassed about. You may become closer with the person
you are talking to by having a good laugh about past embarrassments. [7]
 If you're using this tactic in the moments after the embarrassing event, you might
say something like: "well, now that embarrassment is on your mind, have you
done anything embarrassing lately?"
6.
6
Breathe. Your heart may be racing, you may feel hot, you may be upset. Doing
something embarrassing can lead to all of these negative feelings. Help to fight
them off, and your embarrassment, by taking some deep breaths.[8]
 Inhale for 5 seconds through your nose, then exhale for 5 seconds through your
mouth.
Part2
Addressing Your Thoughts and Feelings
1.
1
Distance yourself from your feelings. If you are having trouble dealing with an
embarrassing moment, try creating some distance between yourself and your
feelings. This can especially help when you are feeling overwhelmed by your
feelings and are having trouble thinking straight because of them [9]
 You can create some distance from your feelings by thinking about yourself in
the 3rd person (i.e., he shouldn't be embarrassed because everyone does
something embarrassing from time to time, so it's actually quite a normal
thing) [10]
2.
2
Distract yourself. Give yourself some time to forget about the embarrassing
thing you did. There are several ways you might distract yourself. You could:
 Watch a movie.
 Read a book
 Play video games
 Go out with friends
 Volunteer for a charity
3.
3
Direct your attention to the present. Embarrassment is a thing of the past. It
happened before now. The moment is gone. Although this is much easier said
than done in the midst of an embarrassing moment, try to focus your attention on
the present moment or future when dealing with embarrassment - you may find
yourself less bothered by something that has already occurred.[11]
4.
4
Remove yourself from the situation. If you're really embarrassed, see if you
can appropriately get yourself out of there. Say you need to use the bathroom or
take an important call. This can give you a time to collect yourself after an
embarrassing incident.[12]
5.
5
Talk to a therapist. If you think you are someone who gets easily embarrassed
or socially anxious, or if you feel like you get embarrassed more than you would
like to, it may be worth talking to a therapist about. She could help you change
the way you think or react to embarrassing situations. There may be medications
that are offered to you that could help to make you less sensitive to social
anxiety, too. [13] To find a therapist, you can:
 Google the terms "therapist + your city name or zip code."
 Use this link to find a therapist near you: http://locator.apa.org/
Part3
Navigating Others' Embarrassment
1.
1
Be empathetic. Try to keep in mind that we all get embarrassed sometimes. It's
not fun to be the one who is embarrassed, so don't act in ways that make her
embarrassment worse than it already is.
 To be empathetic, take her perspective. Think about how you would feel if you
were in that situation. Imagine what she might be going through in the
moment. [14]
 You can also remind her about a time the same thing or a similar thing happened
to you or someone you know, to normalize the situation.
 For example, if she has screwed up the final play in an important basketball
game and is embarrassed by it, you might tell her about a time the same thing
happened to you. If that exact scenario hasn't happened to you before, tell her
about something similar that you did. Maybe you went to the wrong gym and
missed your sports game entirely. Tell her how it made you feel. This will draw
attention away from her while reminding her that embarrassing moments happen
to all of us.
2.
2
Change subjects. If it is clear that she saw that you witnessed her embarrassing
moment, acknowledge it but then quickly change subjects. Make it seem
pressing and like something you have been wanting to ask her but forgot. This
will make it seem like the conversation is happening naturally rather than being a
ploy to make her feel less embarrassed. You want to get her mind off the
embarrassing moment completely, you don't want her wondering whether your
changing the subject was to avoid an awkward situation, which may make her
even more embarrassed.[15]
 When you change subjects, put some excitement into your voice. Remember that
you want her to think that you finally remembered to ask her something. For
example, you might ask whether she heard about something major that
happened on the news - if it relates to something personal about her then even
better.
3.
3
Don't make fun of the person. She already feels embarrassed, don't add to it
by magnifying the situation with jokes about it. Although humor can be a good
way to defuse embarrassment, it is best used when you are the one who did
something embarrassing. If you make fun of someone else who is embarrassed,
you will probably look like a jerk.[16]
4.
4
Pretend you don't know what happened. Using this tactic will depend on how
believable it is. If you both locked eyes during her embarrassing moment, using
this tactic is largely out of the question. However, if her attention was not directly
at you when she did something embarrassing, you can pretend yours was, too. If
she looks embarrassed you could apologize and say you had to check your
phone but you're ready to get back to the conversation now.
 If she looks really embarrassed, your tale will be more believable if you
acknowledge she looks flustered. Let her know you notice something about her.
Ask her if everything is ok or if anything happened. This is what you would
probably do if you really didn't see what happened but noticed she looked
flustered afterwards, after all.
Community Q&A
 Question
What if I gave my crush a love letter and he and his friends are laughing
about it and telling my classmates?
Tommy Chappell
Community Answer
Try to shrug it off. It was a gesture of love and kindness, and I'm sure your crush
would appreciate it. It took a lot of courage to send your crush a letter, and if it
was in good faith I see nothing wrong with it. He might actually be flattered you
gave him a letter, in my opinion the friends only stimulate the situation not the
opposite. Who knows, this could be a fun opportunity. After all, isn't that what
love is all about, danger and fun? Be compassionate to yourself and pat yourself
on the back for being brave no matter what anyone thinks. They are just
immature.
Not Helpful 0Helpful 10
 Question
What if I accidentally posted something embarrassing on social media?
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
Delete the post, as soon as possible. If people have seen it and laugh about it,
then say you were hacked by someone. If you can't get away with lying, just lay
low for a bit, people will forget all about it before you know it.
 Question
What do I do when I said something I didn't know was not polite to my dad
in front of my family members?
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
Apologize to your dad. Make it sincere, and if you are worried about what the rest
of your family might think, maybe try to apologize to your dad in front of them.
 Question
What if I said something really stupid in front of a huge audience?
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
They will likely laugh with you, not at you, if you laugh as well.
 Question
What would I do if I said something embarrassing in front of my cousins?
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
Humor is the best in these situations. Laugh it off, and say something like,"Haha!
What I MEANT to say was___."
 Question
What if I am playing a sport and do something that is incorrect?
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
Laugh it off! Many people have made mistakes while playing a sport. If you are
really feeling down about it, look to your team mates for support!
 Question
What can I do if I get disciplined in front of the whole class?
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
Having been in this situation before, it's best to just admit your mistake, accept
your punishment, and move on. If anyone tries to tease afterwards, just say "I
already heard it from the teacher, lets move on."
 Question
What should I do if someone keeps on bringing up an embarrassing thing I

did?
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
If someone keeps bringing up something you did, you could turn the focus on
them and bring up the most embarrassing thing they did and see how they like it.
Embarrassing things happen to us all. You could also tell them how much it
bothers you and ask them to stop. No one has the right to make anyone feel bad.
 Question
What if I fall in front of my crush and he laughed about it? My friends keep
bringing that subject saying that my crush wouldn't like me anymore.
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
That's silly. No decent person will stop liking you because you fall. If he does,
then at least you know now that he's a total jerk. Most likely he just laughed
because it seemed funny at the time, and he's since forgotten all about it. Tell
your friend to give it a rest.
 Question
What can I do if I had my period, leaked on my chair, and a guy nearby saw
it?
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
It happens to all of us. Just keep in mind that it was absolutely not your fault, and
that it's natural to have your period. Accidents happen to everyone.
Show more answers
Unanswered Questions
 How do I not feel embarrassed about messages I sent to my crush?
Answer this question Flag as...
 What if I asked a girl out and I said something embarrassing? How do I get
over that and the rejection?
 How do I deal with embarrassing moments in the bathroom?

 How do I deal with someone else who embarrassed me in front of a lot of

people?
 What do I do if my parents are calling me names in public to embarrass

me?
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Ask a Question
How to Deal With Embarrassment

Co-authored by Paul Chernyak, LPC
In this Article:Dealing with Embarrassing SituationsDealing with Past EmbarrassmentsUnderstanding
EmbarrassmentCommunity Q&A17 References
Everyone gets embarrassed at some point in time because everyone makes

mistakes. Embarrassment may be the result of unwanted attention, a mistake, or
being placed in a situation that makes you uncomfortable. You may feel like you
want to hide away until the embarrassment passes, but there are better ways to
deal with embarrassment. You can try to understand your feelings of
embarrassment better, learn to laugh at yourself, and be compassionate to
yourself when you become embarrassed.
Method 1
Dealing with Embarrassing Situations
1.
1
Evaluate the situation. How you handle an embarrassing situation depends on
what has happened to embarrass you. For example, if you did something wrong,
like made an inappropriate comment to a friend, you may feel embarrassed
because you should not have said what you did. But if you feel embarrassed
because you did something by accident, like tripping and falling in front of a large
group of people, that is a different situation. Each situation requires a slightly
different approach to overcome the feelings of embarrassment. [1]
2.
2
Apologize if necessary. If you did something wrong, you will need to apologize
for your mistake. Having to apologize might make you feel a bit more
embarrassed, but it is necessary to deal with the original embarrassment and
move forward. Make sure that your apology is sincere and direct.[2]
 Try saying something like, “I am sorry that I did/said that. I didn’t mean it. I will try
to be more thoughtful in the future.”
3.
3
Forgive yourself and stop beating yourself up. After you have apologized (if it
was necessary), you need to forgive yourself for what you did or said. Forgiving
yourself is an important step in dealing with embarrassment because it will help
you to stop beating yourself up. By forgiving yourself, you are sending yourself
the message that you made an honest mistake and it is nothing to dwell on. [3]
 Try telling yourself something like, “I forgive myself for what I did. I am only
human and I am bound to make mistakes sometimes.”
4.
4
Distract yourself and others. While you don’t want to ignore the embarrassing
thing that you did or said, after you have evaluated it and dealt with the situation
you should move on. You can help yourself and other move past the
embarrassing thing by changing the subject or inviting them to do something
else.[4]
 For example, after you have apologized and forgiven yourself for saying
something inappropriate to a friend, ask them if they watched the news last night.
Or, pay them a compliment. Say something like, “Hey, I love your outfit. Where
did you get it?”
Method 2
Dealing with Past Embarrassments
1.
1
Reflect on your most embarrassing moments. While it may be painful to
review the most embarrassing things that have ever happened to you, it can help
you to put other embarrassing moments into perspective. Make a list of the top 5
most embarrassing things that have ever happened to you and compare them to
your most recent embarrassment.[5]
2.
2
Laugh at yourself. After you have made your list of embarrassing moments,
allow yourself to laugh at yourself. Laughing at things that you done can be a
cleansing experience. By looking at them as silly things that happened in your
past, you can help yourself to move past feelings of embarrassment.[6]
 For example, if you once walked through the lunch room with your skirt tucked
into your underwear, try to laugh about the experience. Try to see it from an
outsider’s perspective and remove yourself from the negative feelings. Realize
that it was just a silly mistake that probably made people do a double take or
possibly even a spit take.
 Try discussing embarrassing moments with a trusted friend. It might make it
easier for you to laugh at someone if you tell the story to someone who was not
there and it can also be a good way for you to hear about someone else’s
embarrassing moments.
3.
3
Be compassionate towards yourself. If you can’t bring yourself to laugh at
what you did, try being compassionate towards yourself. Acknowledge your
embarrassment and talk to yourself like a good friend. Give yourself permission
to feel embarrassed and understand the pain that that situation has caused for
you.[7]
 Try to remind yourself of who you are and what your core values are. This can
help you to ground yourself and brush off some embarrassment and with self-
compassion.
4.
4
Focus on the present. Once you have comforted yourself through laughter or
compassion, bring yourself back into the present moment. Recognize that the
embarrassing moment is in the past. Try to focus your attention on what is
happening in your life right now. Where are you? What are you doing? Who are
you with? How do you feel? Changing your focus to the here and now may help
you to stop dwelling on things that happened to you in the past.[8]
5.
5
Keep trying to be your best. Although embarrassment can be painful, it may
also be useful for personal development. If you did or said something wrong that
has caused you to feel embarrassed, think about what you can do to avoid doing
or saying something similar in the future. If you made an honest mistake that
could have happened to anyone, recognize that you did not do anything wrong
and move on.
 Try not to get hung up on what you did or said because dwelling on it can be
more painful than the initial experience.[9]
6.
6
Consider seeing a therapist. If you still cannot get past your feelings of
embarrassment despite your best efforts, consider seeing a therapist for help.
You may be dealing with something that requires ongoing work or your
embarrassment may be related to other thinking patterns such as rumination or
possibly low self-esteem.
Method 3
Understanding Embarrassment
1.
1
Recognize that embarrassment is normal. Feeling embarrassed can make
you feel like something is wrong with you or you are all alone, but it is important
to remember that these feelings are not accurate. Embarrassment is a normal
feeling just like being happy, sad, mad, etc. When you are feeling embarrassed,
remember that everyone feels embarrassed at some point in time.
 To see that embarrassment is something that everyone feels, ask your parents or
another trusted person to tell you about a time when they got embarrassed.[10]
2.
2
Learn that it is okay if people know you are embarrassed. One of the worst
things about feeling embarrassment is when people know you are embarrassed.
Knowing that others know you are embarrassed can make feel even more
embarrassed. This is because embarrassment makes you feel exposed or
vulnerable due to the fear of being judged by others.[11] Unlike shame, which can
be both a public and private event, embarrassment is mostly a public
event.[12] Try to remind yourself that there is nothing wrong with people knowing
that you are embarrassed about something because it is a normal emotion.
 One way to address the perceived judgement of others is to be realistic and ask
yourself if others are judging you or if you are judging yourself.
3.
3
Understand that some embarrassment can be helpful. While being
embarrassed is never a fun experience, occasional minor embarrassment can be
helpful. Some research has found that people who blush when they do or say
something wrong may be seen as more trustworthy. This is because those
people are demonstrating their awareness of social rules. So if you blush on
occasion when you make a minor mistake, don’t dwell on it because it may
actually make people see you in a more positive light.[13]
4.
4
Consider the relationship between embarrassment and
perfectionism. Perfectionism can contribute to feelings of embarrassment. You
may be holding yourself to unrealistically high standards that cause you to feel
like you are failing if you do not live up to them. These feelings of failure may
lead to embarrassment, so it is important to set realistic standards for yourself.[14]
 Remind yourself that you are your biggest critic. While it may seem like the world
is watching and judging you, that is not a realistic perspective. Think about how
much you pay attention to little things that other people say and do. It is unlikely
that you scrutinize others the same way that you do to yourself. [15]
5.
5
Think about the relationship between embarrassment and
confidence. Confident people tend to experience less embarrassment than
people who lack confidence.[16] If you have low self-confidence, you might
experience more embarrassment or more severe feelings of embarrassment than
you should. Try to build up your self-confidence in order to reduce the amount of
embarrassment that you feel on a daily basis.
 If you are extremely self-conscious, you may even find yourself dealing with
shame, which is not the same thing as embarrassment. Shame is the result of a
poor self-image, which can be caused by often feeling embarrassed.[17] Consider
talking with a therapist if you feel like embarrassment has left you with feelings of
shame.
Share Your Experience With This Issue

Yes, I experienced this issue too!
Describe your experience:
Submit
Community Q&A
 Question
How to handle the embarrassment when you have fallen in front of a large
crowed very awkwardly?
Jessica B. Casey
M.A, Clinical Mental Health Counseling

Expert Answer
Ouch! I think we’ve all been there once or twice. You have a few choice in how to
deal with it. Some people use humor, such as, “Whoops! Should have skipped
that last beer.” Others like to to be direct such as, “Oh my gosh — well that was
embarrassing — anyway…” Or you could also just excuse yourself to compose
yourself in a place that isn’t so public then return when you’re ready. Either way
it’s important to remember that falling is a totally normal and human thing to do
and it just happens sometimes.
 Question
I am definitely a perfectionist, and I hold standards for myself that are far
too high. Any advice as to how to not make these super high standards in
the first place?
Jessica B. Casey
M.A, Clinical Mental Health Counseling

Expert Answer
It’s ok to have high goals and standards. The trouble comes when you have an
uncomfortable or poor reaction to not meeting those standards. Try some
exercises in self-compassion and radical self-acceptance. Also check out our
articles on self-love and acceptance. These can all help you to alter how you
think about ‘failure’ and perfection and thus help you to cope when things aren’t
working out perfectly.
 Question
I'm embarrassed by my dad who sends me to school on a motorcycle while

my friends come with fancy cars. What can I do?
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
C'mon, your dad sounds super awesome! You get to be dropped off at school on
a motorcycle? That's super cool. If those people are your true friends they will
think it's cool too. Just don't talk about it and they won't bring it up. You really are
lucky, you just don't realize it yet.
 Question
What can I do if I did something embarrassing in front of my friend? I am

going to back to school soon and I am afraid to see him.
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
Be confident that your friend is over it too and ignore what happened. If he raises
it, just say something like: "Yeah, that was dumb wasn't it but I'm so over it and
hope you are too". Then leave it at that and change the subject. It is great that
you have had a break, other things will have taken over his thoughts since the
act.
 Question
What can I do when people tease me at school and laugh at me?
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
If they laugh at you, laugh with them about yourself. They will get bored and stop.
It's not fun for people who tease you if it doesn't get to you.
 Question
I cried at school all day long. How do I overcome this embarassment?
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
Remind yourself that crying is normal and shows that you've got feelings.
Everyone has been in your position at some point in time, so they will
understand. Also, some people find that talking to friends or family members
about their embarrassment helps them feel better.
 Question
People at school will imitate my voice and things like that. How can I stop
them or at least not feel embarrassed about it?
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
Tell them how you feel. If they don't stop, tell someone you trust, and be
confident. This happens to everyone, don't worry.
 Question
How do I stop embarrassing yourself?
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
We all embarrass ourselves now and then. It's part of being human. Just laugh it
off with an "Oops! Sorry about that!" and carry on. Don't be so hard on yourself.
 Question
I smoked weed at school and started crying and was doing funny things in
front of my schoolmates. Now I'm afraid everyone will judge me if I go back
to school. How do I overcome the embarrassment?
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
We all do embarrassing things now and then. Laugh it off, and your classmates
will too. But in the future, try to stop smoking weed, and it won't happen again.
 Question
What can I do about constant teasing at school because of an

embarrassing incident?
wikiHow Contributor
Community Answer
First, know that everybody gets teased once in a while, and that it's okay to laugh
at yourself. Ignore those that tease you, and know that they are probably trying to
deal with their own issues.
Show more answers
Unanswered Questions
 What should I do if I get teased about my crush in front of my crush and my
whole class?
Ask a Question
Submit
Video
Tips
 When something embarrassing happens, don't cause a huge scene. This will
only cause the event to stick in the minds of others. Stay calm and don't freak
out.
 Laugh it off with your mates. Act like it doesn't bother you and they won't think it's
such a big deal.
 Don’t obsess over little things. Minor embarrassments are nothing to dwell on.
Try to brush them off and keep going.
 If you have a good friend, you can tell them about your embarrassing situation
and laugh about it together.
 If you are buying something embarrassing for yourself, you can purchase an
inexpensive birthday card with it to make it seem like it's a gift.
How to Handle
Embarrassment
Everyone agrees embarrassment can be excruciating. But is the emotion all
bad? Discover its surprising upside—and learn how to get over it more easily—
with this expert advice for kids and adults.
By Jennifer King Lindley
Each product we feature has been independently selected and reviewed by our editorial team. If you
make a purchase using the links included, we may earn commission.
PinFBPrintMore
BRIAN CRONIN
Nothing to See Here!

You had grand plans to walk gracefully across the floor of the conference
center and say hello to your boss. Instead, you tripped over your own feet,
slammed into a stranger (whose drink and papers went flying), and landed,
gracelessly, on your hands and knees. Everyone is staring, and just like that, the
hot flush of embarrassment has taken you hostage. Your face is burning, you’re
flustered, and you might even feel immobilized. (The word embarrassment
derives from the Portuguese word for noose.)
Horrible for you, but from a social perspective, it’s the beginning of recovery.
“Showing embarrassment acts as a sort of physical apology to those around
you,” says Christine R. Harris, Ph.D., a professor of psychology at the
University of California, San Diego, who has studied the emotion extensively.
She adds that it elicits sympathy, “smoothing over goofs and promoting group
harmony.” Across cultures, people express embarrassment with the same body
language: averted gaze, head tipped down, tight smile, hands touching face.
These signs may be a variation of the appeasement gestures that animals use.
(Think of a dachshund rolling on his back to greet a looming mastiff.) The
display says, “Don’t worry—I mean no harm!”
More science: Because embarrassment is a sign that you care about the way
others see you, experiencing it openly can make you more likable. A 2011
study published in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology found that
subjects were more willing to trust someone who showed embarrassment after
being lauded for an accomplishment than someone who reacted with a display
of pride, like a confident smile. (This may explain why the world found
Jennifer Lawrence’s sheepish 2013 Oscars acceptance speech adorable but
Anne Hathaway’s pronouncement—“It came true!”—um, less so.)
However, embarrassment can also work against us. A 2013 study from the
National Literacy Trust, in the United Kingdom, measured the daily reading
habits of almost 35,000 children, ages 8 to 16, and found that one in five
claimed that they would be embarrassed if their friends saw them reading a
book. In a study by Harris published in American Scientist in 2006, half of the
study’s adult respondents said that they had hesitated or failed to report a
worrisome symptom to a physician for “fear of looking foolish” if it turned out
to be trivial.
An Emotion for All Ages

When does embarrassment first become part of our lives? Earlier than you
might think. At about age three, Harris says, kids begin to understand that
others have expectations of how they should behave, and so they blush and
freeze up when someone judges them negatively. (Think of a mom scowling
when her son grabs more than his share of Lego blocks on a playdate.) By
school age, kids are anxious to fit in with peers; they begin to get flustered by
anything that makes them look different in front of others, from a bad hair day
to ripped pants. Kids at this age can be so self-conscious that they may even
avoid activities that they love simply because their friends aren’t into them.
But grade school is nothing compared with the teen years, when a perfect storm
of factors arises. During this time, one of the parts of the brain that monitors the
reactions of others (known as the rostral cingulate zone) grows rapidly. “As
your skin is breaking out, thanks to raging hormones, your brain is telling you
to worry even more about what people think of you,” says social scientist
David Allyn, the author of I Can’t Believe I Just Did That: How
Embarrassment Can Wreak Havoc in Your Life and What You Can Do to
Conquer It, (amazon.com).
Fortunately most people develop thicker skins and a stronger sense of personal
identity as hormones even out, notes mental-health writer Therese J. Borchard,
the author of The Pocket Therapist: An Emotional Survival Kit,
($10, amazon.com). But not all adults outgrow their tendency to feel
embarrassment. “Some people are naturally self-conscious, and this may run in
families,” says Kenneth Barish, Ph.D., a psychologist and the author of Pride &
Joy: A Guide to Understanding Your Child’s Emotions and Solving Family
Problems, ($15, amazon.com). Others may hold themselves to unreasonably
high standards and feel unnecessarily embarrassed every time they fail to meet
their own expectations. In either case, easily embarrassed adults rarely know
how to handle their predicament. Many cling to ineffective coping strategies
that they relied on when they were younger: “A teenager may decide never to
speak in class because he doesn’t want anyone to laugh at him,” says Allyn.
“Twenty years later, that same person may be unable to speak up in meetings.”
However, there are ways to prevent that fate, as well as tactics for recasting our
relationship to embarrassment. “No one can be embarrassment-proof,” says
Barish. “But we can learn to be less vulnerable and bounce back better.”
Embarrassment-Recovery
Strategies
Confront incidents head-on. When you walk into a party and discover that your
skirt is tucked into your tights, your natural impulse may be to camp out in the
bathroom for the rest of the night. But hiding can jump-start an unfortunate
chain reaction. “Other people might think that you’re avoiding them, and then
they’ll start avoiding you,” says Allyn. The same rule applies for kids. When
your child feels that she has embarrassed herself (say, flubbing her monologue
in the school play), she may want to cancel Saturday’s slumber party. Gently
encourage her to reconsider. To start, suggests Lynne Kenney, Psy.D., a
pediatric psychologist and a coauthor of Bloom: Helping Children Blossom,
($8, amazon.com), “talk to her about what happened in a caring but not overly
emotional way. You want to pour water on the event, not gasoline.” Then focus
on some things that went well that day, such as the spelling quiz that she aced.
This will help her put things in perspective. Finally, prepare her for what’s
next, suggesting something to say if classmates bring up the incident: “Yeah,
that was no fun. Want to see my new Super Ball?” If your child can act as if it’s
no big deal, others will probably follow suit and lose interest, too.
Stop playing the tape. The worst part of embarrassment is the endless mental
loop that reignites the pain over and over again. When a mortifying memory
enters your consciousness, pull your attention back to the present—count your
breaths or take a walk and concentrate on each step. Or push out the replay with
a methodical task, like cleaning. Says Allyn, “Embarrassment leaves us feeling
like we have lost control. Cleaning and organizing help us regain it.” Teach
kids to sing a song in their heads or to do something silly but challenging, like
walking backward in a circle. “You have to recruit different parts of your brain
for an exercise like that. It gets your mind unstuck,” says Kenney.
Remember that no one is thinking about you but you.President Obama and
Chief Justice John G. Roberts Jr. messed up the oath of office during the 2009
inauguration, and people talked about the gaffe for a day, maybe two. So what
are the chances that anyone is obsessing over the typo in your e-mail? “We
overestimate the extent to which our actions are noticed by others,” says Mary
Lamia, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist and the author of Emotions: Making
Sense of Your Feelings, ($12.50, amazon.com). We may think that the entire
restaurant is recoiling in horror when we spill a drink, but the other diners are
probably focused on what to have for dessert. Social scientists call this “the
spotlight effect.”
Model brave behavior. Allyn says that we can help our kids to be less easily
flustered if we exhibit healthy risk-taking ourselves. “A lot of adults won’t go
to a movie solo because they would be embarrassed to be seen sitting alone. So
do it, then talk to your kids about it,” says Allyn. Along the same lines, if your
kids see you laugh when you realize that your shirt has been misbuttoned all
morning, maybe they’ll giggle when the same thing happens to them.
Share your story. In a study published in the Journal of Personality, a

researcher asked subjects to sing the schmaltzy 70s ballad “Feelings” in his
presence. One group was allowed to express their embarrassment to the
researcher immediately afterward; the other group had to keep mum. Later on,
both groups completed a survey about how embarrassed they felt. Those who
had confessed felt significantly less mortified than did those who had to stay
quiet. In other words, there’s relief in unloading. Another benefit? “When you
share an embarrassment with someone, they often tell you about an even bigger
one,” says Lamia. You help two people with one confession.
ow to Come Back From an

Embarrassing Incident at Work
Like death and taxes, embarrassing moments are a fact of life. When they occur, your first
reaction may be to crawl away and hide. But this isn’t easy to do if something embarrassing
happens at work. After all, you can’t just call in sick or avoid your co-workers indefinitely.
The first step to dealing with an embarrassing incident at work is to know that these
moments happen to everybody. Rather than pretending it didn’t happen, own it, whether
that means laughing it off, or in bigger cases, repairing the damage. Here are some ways to
make an awkward experience less awkward.
Maintain Composure
The best thing you can do during an embarrassing moment is remain composed. That way,
you’ll have a better shot at reacting appropriately (rather than defensively) and recovering
faster. Of course, this is easier said than done. But if you’re able to put others at ease after
the incident, chances are you won’t be judged as harshly.
Have a Sense of Humor

Humor is the single most powerful antidote to any embarrassing situation. Not only does
humor diffuse a tense moment, it softens the humiliation. If you can laugh at yourself, people
are often willing to forgive a lot. As a matter of fact, they might even like you better.
Take Responsibility
Sometimes an embarrassing incident involves other people. Maybe you offended your boss
or made a coworker uncomfortable. The worst thing you can do is to pretend your blunder
didn’t happen and hope it will blow over. Take responsibility for what you’ve said or done by
talking with the person directly. Be professional and apologize if you were wrong. Offer to
make amends and assure them that it will never happen again.
Accept Your Humanness

Perhaps you believe you need to uphold a certain image of perfection in order to be
respected. But in reality, the best you (or anyone) can do is to be the best version of yourself,
with all your strengths and challenges. It’s important to remember that you aren’t perfect;
you’re human. We all are.
Live in the Present

If you’ve done everything you possibly can do to rectify the situation and repair your image,
it’s time to move on. Although you can’t control what others think of you, you can control
how you behave now and in the future. See your mistake as a gift of sorts – an opportunity
to learn something about yourself and show what you’re made of.
HERE’S HOW TO OVERCOME

EMBARRASSMENT AND IMPROVE
YOUR SELF-CONFIDENCE
Emotional Mastery / By Adam Sicinski
The rate at which a person can mature is directly
proportional to the embarrassment he can tolerate. –
Douglas Engelbart
Is the Fear of Embarrassment

Holding You Back From Being
Your Very Best Self?
When we’re embarrassed we feel somewhat uneasy,
ashamed, and kind of self-conscious. We feel this way
because being embarrassed is somewhat of a forgotten
fear that prevents us from reaching our full potential.
On the surface, we wouldn’t usually classify
embarrassment as a fear. However, for the purpose of this
discussion, it can be helpful to look at it in this context.
Embarrassment often manifests as a result of our

insecurities. It manifests when a weakness or an
inadequacy is suddenly made public.
You might also feel embarrassed because you’re feeling
guilty about something you did that has now become public
knowledge.
Likewise, you might end up feeling embarrassed when
you’re caught doing something that is socially
unacceptable. These events can often make us feel
incredibly uncomfortable and self-conscious.
When hidden secrets are suddenly made public, that’s

when embarrassment truly kicks in. As a result, you’re
now open to judgment, ridicule, rejection, and criticism. All
of a sudden, it seems as though embarrassment isn’t the
only fear on your mind.
Some People Have Absolutely No Shame…
You’ve probably heard the saying that some people have
absolutely no shame. These are the kind of people that
don’t often concern themselves with what others think
or say about them. In fact, these people never get
embarrassed and are usually very open about every aspect
of their lives.
These people don’t care about being rejected or
criticized. In fact, they seem to relish the opportunity when
others don’t approve of their decisions or behavior.
These people have no shame because they feel
comfortable and secure in their own skin. They are
confident and have an ample amount of self-
esteem and self-belief.
Other People are Riddled with Insecurity…
In contrast, a person who’s afraid of being embarrassed is
often very insecure. They have extremely low self-esteem
and tend to fear judgment, ridicule, and criticism.
These are the kinds of people who often try to please
others. They try their hardest to live up to other people’s
expectations of them. However, the problem is, they just
don’t feel deserving.
Subsequently, these people fear to make mistakes and
are petrified of failure. This naturally leads to hesitant
action and indecision. And that is precisely when the fear
of embarrassment manifests in their lives.
Suffering from the fear of embarrassment can actually be
quite debilitating. It tends to stifle self-confidence while
undermining social and personal growth.
The fear of embarrassment discourages risk-taking and,
thereby, prevents a person from attempting new things
and taking advantage of opportunities.
People who fear embarrassment will rarely if ever step
outside their comfort zones. Their comfort zone provides
them with a sense of security and certainty. While the
outside world presents uncertaintyand potential pain.
Stop Getting Caught Up in the Perfectionist
Trap!
The fear of embarrassment may also stem from
a perfectionistic nature.
The idea is that unless we do things perfectly, then we
will never truly be good enough. And if we aren’t good
enough, then obviously that makes us feel like a failure.
And, we, of course, can’t accept that as part of our reality.
It’s important to understand that nobody is actually
perfect. Perfection is only an opinion. What’s ideal for
one person is far from perfect for another person.
Given this, perfection depends entirely on the standards
you set and on the expectations you have of yourself in
each particular situation.
The moment you lower your standards and expectations
(making them more realistic and achievable) is the
moment you begin ridding yourself of the fear of
embarrassment.
With imperfection in mind, it’s helpful to remind ourselves
that everyone makes mistakes. Mistakes are a part of life.
For this very reason, it’s crucial to allow yourself room to
make mistakes and to ultimately fail at
times. Everything that happens is merely a learning
experience. And other people will often respect that.
We all know that nobody else is perfect. We all know that
everyone makes mistakes. We all know that people fail at
times. In fact, often while attempting new things, people
fail more often then they succeed.
It’s the growth that we get from our failures and mistakes
that makes all the difference in the end. It’s this growth
that helps us gain the experience and self-confidence we
need to do things better the next time around.
Make a Concerted Effort to Subdue Your
Critical Voice!
When it comes to making mistakes, failing and feeling
embarrassed, it’s important to understand that you’re
always your own biggest critic.
You might think that other people will judge and criticize
you. Yes, some people might, but most people probably
won’t.
The majority of people will actually empathize with

you. They will relate to what you’re going through
because at one time or another they were in exactly
your position or know someone who experienced
something similar.
Yes, events and circumstances might’ve been somewhat
different. However, we’re all human. We all make mistakes
and get embarrassed at times. It’s just a part of life, and
certainly not something that needs to affect you in a
negative and limiting way.
Would it surprise you if I told you that the vast

majority of people who will take the time to judge you
don’t really care? In truth, they judge because judging
distracts them from their own problems.
Yes, these people may judge, criticize, and give you their
undivided concentration. However, the reality is
that they’re already so absorbed in their own world and
in their own problems that you’ll be lucky to get only a
few moments of their focused attention.
With that in mind, it’s not actually other people who
make you feel self-conscious, it’s rather your own
critical voice that creates these problems.
Consider for a moment that what makes you feel
embarrassed actually inspires and excites another
person. Or, how about what makes you feel embarrassed
actually challenges and motivatessomeone else.
Therefore, embarrassment isn’t so much what happens
to you, but rather how you interpret what happens to
you. And all this comes back to that critical miserable
voice inside your head.
Prepare yourself to tune-out that critical voice. Only then
will you move forward with a greater sense of confidence.
Only then will you find the personal power you need
override the fear of embarrassment.
What to do Before You Get

Embarrassed
There are certain things you can do before you step into an
uncomfortable situation where you might feel somewhat
embarrassed or uncertain.
The guidelines that follow explore various things you can

do to prepare yourself for those moments of potential
embarrassment. Working through these guidelines will
allow you to handle those awkward moments far more
effectively.
At this stage, it’s mostly all about building your anti-
embarrassment muscle. This muscle must be flexed and
strengthened so that when you go out into the world,
you can bear the brunt of the challenges that life throws
your way.
First, Subdue Your Expectations
The first thing you must do is subdue your expectations.
If your expectations leave you no room for making
mistakes and for goofing things up a little, then you’re just
setting yourself up for failure.
With that in mind, take a moment to subdue the

expectations you have about yourself and the
expectations you have for yourself in this particular
situation. Ask yourself:
What are my expectations?
What expectations do I have of myself?
What expectations do I have of myself in this particular

situation?
Are my expectations realistic and reasonable?
Do they allow me room to make mistakes?
How could I reasonably adjust my expectations?

Be open to the fact that you will make mistakes.
Mistakes are a healthy and natural part of life. It’s okay to
goof up. As a matter a fact, you shouldn’t be embarrassed
when things don’t turn out as expected. Everyone is
fallible, and nobody is ever perfect no matter how they
appear to be on the surface.
Just accept the fact that mistakes will be made. To do this,

you will need to let go of your perfectionist nature. Tell
yourself:
It’s okay that I’m not perfect…
It’s okay to make mistakes…
It’s perfectly okay to fail as long as I learn from the

experience…
Get comfortable with being imperfect. Every mistake you
make is nothing more than a learning experience that
will help you get better the next time around.
Learn to Handle Fear in Optimal Ways
The fear of embarrassment is closely tied to the fear of
uncertainty, rejection, and criticism. It could even be
said that the fear of embarrassment is nothing more but
a mashup of all three fears.
To overcome the fear of embarrassment, we must learn
more about how to handle fear more effectively in our daily
lives.
When you learn to handle these three fears successfully,

you will feel far more confident when stepping into
uncomfortable situations that might potentially
embarrass you.
With that in mind, spend some time learning how to handle
the following types of fear:
 The fear of rejection
 The fear of criticism
 The fear of failure
 The fear of success
 The fear of making mistakes
 The fear of uncertainty
 And any other fear you feel gets in your way
As you build your fear muscle, you will naturally gain

more certainty. And with more certainty, you will develop
added motivation and self-confidence, which will
subsequently help you overcome your feelings of
embarrassment.
Preparation and Attention to Detail

To overcome your feelings of embarrassment, it’s
paramount that you focus on developing two critical things.
First, you must develop your mental alertness and

awareness. This is important because while performing
specific tasks and activities you will need to be mentally
alert and aware of everything that is going on around you.
When you’re in this mindful mental state of awareness,

you will be far more likely to change direction at a
moments notice and respond to unexpected events and
circumstances as they arise.
What this effectively means is that you’ll be less likely to
get embarrassed.
There will essentially be no surprises as you’ll be

mentally ready for everything and flexible enough to
change your decisions, behavior, and actions at a
moments notice.
Developing alertness and awareness, of course, comes with
time. It mostly comes down to a commitment to
mindfulness.
Be mindful of the moment, and pay attention to how you’re
doing and going about things. Also, be mindful of the
results you get from doing these things and how this effects
and influences the things around you.
The second thing you must do to subdue your feelings of

embarrassment is to take time to prepare yourself
thoroughly.
The more thoroughly you prepare, the more confident and
capable you will feel, and the less likely you’ll make
mistakes and subsequently get embarrassed.
Be careful though not to get lost in the details. Don’t fall

into the perfectionist trap. Prepare enough to understand
what’s required to face the challenges that await you
along your journey.
Examine Your Limiting Beliefs
It’s very possible that you succumb to feelings of
embarrassment because you have limiting beliefs about
specific situations, or about your ability to handle your
emotions in those situations.
One way to overcome your limiting beliefs is to begin
questioning the validity of each belief. Actually, spend time
throwing doubts upon these beliefs by asking yourself:
What belief is causing me to feel embarrassed?

What do I believe about myself or about the situation I find
myself in?
Is this a realistic belief to have?
What doesn’t make sense about this belief?
Where’s the evidence that disproves this belief?
Who could provide me with another perspective that could

disprove this belief?
Gain other people’s perspectives and thoughts about your
beliefs. Listen to what they say. You might be surprised at
how they view things. Maybe your belief is not as
legitimate as you initially made it out to be.
Work on Developing Your Self-Confidence

The more confidence you have in yourself and in your own
ability, the less likely you are to succumb to all types of
fear including embarrassment, criticism, rejection, making
mistakes, and failure.
Confident people don’t typically fall prey to embarrassment
because they feel comfortable in their own skin.
Their confidence encourages them to take risks, to step

outside their comfort zone, to expand their horizons,
and stretch themselves in various ways.
Confidence, of course, comes through knowledge and
experience. In fact, the more knowledge and experience
you gain, the more confident you will feel about yourself
and about your circumstances.
There is, however, no miracle cure for building your self-
confidence. It primarily comes down to a process of trial
and error.
Self-confidence, of course, comes from making mistakes.
More specifically, it comes from learning from those
mistakes. In other words, it comes from gaining the
necessary knowledge and experience you need to figure
things out.
Initially, you might not know what to do. However, over

time you learn and grow from your experience. This
subsequently provides you with the confidence you need
to move forward successfully.
Purposefully Put Yourself in Uncomfortable
Situations
To strengthen your self-confidence and to build your
anti-embarrassment muscle you must purposefully put
yourself in uncomfortable situations.
An uncomfortable situation is something that naturally
makes you feel somewhat uneasy and awkward.
Of course, initially, it’s important to refrain from

these types of experimentations when it comes to the things
that matter most. Instead, at first, experiment with less
significant aspects of your life.
For instance, how about participating in a new sport you
haven’t played before. Initially, you probably won’t be very
good, but who really cares? You’ll make mistakes,
embarrass yourself, laugh it off and have some fun.
Nobody cares, and you shouldn’t care either. Use this
experience to build your anti-embarrassment muscle. Then
next week, challenge yourself in another new way.
Hopefully, over time you will come to understand

that embarrassment is just a little bit of fun. It’s a
learning experience.Everyone gets embarrassed, and it’s
not really a big deal.
Visualize Yourself Handling Embarrassing
Situations
Did you know that the subconscious mind can’t tell the
difference between something real and something
imagined?
This is, of course, significant as it means that you can now

work through embarrassing moments first in your
imagination before tackling them in the real world.
In fact, the more you visualize yourself successfully
and calmly handling an embarrassing moment in your
imagination, the more confidence you will have to tackle
this situation in the real world.
Take time to sit in a quiet place and close your eyes.
Visualize all the events and circumstances surrounding this
activity you have in mind. Actually, see things playing out
in your favor. At least initially.
Next, visualize something unexpected happening that

pushes you outside your comfort zone and makes you feel
awkward and embarrassed.
Within this awkward moment, your emotions could very
easily and quickly get out of control. However, you calmly
center yourself, subdue your emotions and laugh things
off.
You bring a light-hearted nature into everything you

do, and as a result, it’s very difficult for you to feel
embarrassed.
Prepare for Future Embarrassing Scenarios
Moving on from the previous point, take time to reflect on
all the ways you’ve suffered from the fear of
embarrassment.
Have a good think about the specific situations that have

made you feel uneasy. Within these situations are lessons
you must learn that may very well help you in the present
moment.
Also, consider all the things you might potentially feel

embarrassed about in the future. Ask yourself:
What could potentially embarrass me in the future?
How will I respond during these moments?
How must I prepare myself to successfully and calmly

handle these circumstances?
Moving through this visualization process will help you
gain the self-confidence you need to make better
decisions when things unexpectedly don’t go your way.
And when it eventually comes time to do the “real thing” in
the “real world,” you will be ready for anything that life
throws your way. Mental preparation is, of course, the key.
What to do During Moments of
Embarrassment
Okay, so you’ve done all this prior work in an effort to
strengthen your anti-embarrassment muscle. In fact, you
feel ready and revved up to tackle anything that the world
throws your way. Your confidence is at an all-time high.
And you should be confident. You’ve learned how to

handle different types of fears, you’ve subdued your
expectations, worked on developing your self-confidence,
spent time visualizing how to handle embarrassing
moments, and even purposefully put yourself into
uncomfortable and potentially embarrassing situations.
Everything you’ve done up to this stage has helped prepare

you mentally and emotionally for what’s to come.
However, now you’re suddenly faced with the real

thing. Something’s happened, which has created
uncertainty and you’re on the verge of one of the most
embarrassing moments of your life. What to do?
Here are several guidelines to help you handle the fear of
embarrassment when it surprises you unexpectedly.
First, Stay Cool, Calm, and Collected

The most important things you must do is stay cool, calm
and collected. Take several deep breaths, count backward
from ten and settle yourself down by tuning into the present
moment.
Within these critical few moments become mindful of
where you are, what you’re doing, and of your
immediate surroundings.
Don’t regret the past or worry about the future. Just settle in
the present moment.
When you become aware of the moment, you will no
longer think about other people or about what you’re
feeling embarrassed about. Instead, you will be focused on
yourself and on the peaceful sound of your breath.
Take Immediate Responsibility

The second key thing you must do is take full
responsibility for what just happened.
Don’t deny what happened — don’t try to hide behind your
flaws and mistakes. Just take responsibility for what you
did and for what transpired.
It doesn’t even matter whose fault it is. You’re in this
situation, and you must now gracefully work through
your predicament to the best of your ability. Blaming,
chucking a tantrum or shamelessly walking away will be of
no help.
If you made a mistake, own up to it. If something
unexpected happened that made you feel uncomfortable,
then embrace these circumstances.
You can’t change what happened. However, you can
most certainly begin anew right at this very moment.
Think Positively and Creatively
The third most important thing you must do is to think
positively and creatively about the situation you find
yourself in.
Yes, of course, you might be in a bit of a pickle at the
moment. Things are uncomfortable, awkward, and you’re
already feeling somewhat embarrassed.
It’s important not to allow your emotions to get the

better of you.Given this, it’s critical that you think
positively. Ask yourself:
Are things really as bad as I make them out to be?
What if I put a positive spin on the situation?
What if this is an incredible opportunity in disguise?

Staying optimistic and viewing the situation in a positive
light will immediately open a world of possibilities. No
longer will you be the victim of circumstance. Instead,
you will become the master of your own destiny.
Once you feel you’re emotionally in control, begin thinking
creatively about how to get through this situation
successfully.
You can, for instance, do this by envisioning yourself as a

comedian on stage entertaining people. A comedian makes
mistakes, goofs up and gets their audience laughing. Just
maybe, you need to laugh at yourself to ease the tension.
But if that’s not appropriate in your situation, then you

could imagine yourself as an actor acting out a role in a
movie. Envisioning yourself as an actor might help
desensitize you from your predicament.
Finally, how about imagining yourself as a cartoon
character? What would Homer Simpson do in your
situation? Actually, maybe that’s not such a great
example.
Don’t Take Yourself Too Seriously

Moving on from the previous point, it’s imperative that you
don’t take yourself too seriously.
You will goof up, things will happen unexpectedly, and
that’s okay. It’s not so much what happens to you, but
rather how you respond to what happens that makes all
the difference in the end.
Relax and be lighthearted. Learn to laugh at your mistakes
and mishaps. And, above all else, don’t get upset over
trivial matters.
Consider for a moment that what seems embarrassing for
you, might not be embarrassing for others. For all you
know, other people haven’t even noticed your mistake or
mishap.
Just maybe, other people have absolutely no idea why

you’d feel embarrassed about these circumstances in the
first place.
These are all legitimate perspectives. However, you will

struggle to adopt these perspectives if you take yourself
too seriously.
Don’t Succumb to Peer Expectations
Everyone has their own personal set of standards and
expectations for themselves and for others. You can’t
change this.
Other people are entitled to have their own opinions and
viewpoints. They are even free to expect certain things
from you.
However, this doesn’t mean that you must put external

pressure on yourself to meet other people’s expectations.
Instead, clarify your own expectations, live up to your
own standards, and do things at your own pace and in
your own way.
Don’t Retaliate Defensively
If you’re criticized, laughed at or judged, it’s crucial you
don’t retaliate negatively or defensively.
Don’t blame other people for what happened. Don’t lash

out angrily. Emotional outbursts will only aggravate the
situation leading to regret and further embarrassment.
Instead, control your emotional responses, be open to the
possibilities, and take responsibility for keeping a cool
head.
Don’t Focus on the Embarrassing
Circumstances
Once the embarrassing moment has passed, just move on
with what you need to do.
There’s no point dwelling on things. You probably have

better things to do, and you also have the rest of your
life to live.
Don’t allow this one moment to ruin the rest of your day,
your week or even the remainder of this year. It’s not worth
it.
Accept what happened, learn from this experience,

but don’t obsess yourself with endless regrets and “what
if” scenarios. This is never helpful and will just affect
other areas of your life in adverse ways.
What to do After You’ve Been
Embarrassed
Yes, finally, the moment of embarrassment has passed.
You’re out in the clear and can move on with your life.
Well, at least that’s how one would imagine things would
unfold. However, that isn’t always the case.
Many people continue to relive their embarrassing

moments in their imaginations for days, weeks, months and
sometimes even years. In fact, some people never seem to
get over the shame and embarrassment they felt in that
moment.
People get so caught up emotionally in these sorts of

things that they end up developing horrible phobias
that make life unbearably difficult in certain situations.
These phobias, however, don’t only affect them in specific
situations, they also tend to expand into other areas of their
lives ruining their relationships, career prospects, and
health.
Living with the fear of embarrassment is never helpful. It

can actually be quite debilitating and hurtful in the long-
run.
What happened, happened. You either dealt with the

situation successfully and calmly, or you didn’t.
Nothing can be changed. At least nothing can be changed
in the past. However, you can certainly learn from your
experience and use it as a platform to lay down a
stronger foundation for the future.
So whether you thoroughly embarrassed yourself or
successfully managed to work through an embarrassing
situation, you will hopefully find the following guidelines
of value.
First, Forgive Yourself

No matter what happened, no matter how you responded,
and no matter what ended up transpiring, it’s essential that
you forgive yourself and walk away with no regrets.
Only through forgiveness do you have any chance of
moving on with your life.
Holding onto pain and regret will only prevent you from
moving forward. Living with regret doesn’t help anyone
feel better in the long-term.
Stop Apologizing for Your Mistakes

It’s important to keep reminding yourself that you’re
imperfectly perfect. And that’s okay. Perfection is after all
in the eye of the beholder. What looks like perfection for
one person is far from perfect for another person.
Immediately, stop apologizing for your mistakes.
Instead, embrace your mistakes. Mistakes are powerful
learning tools you can use to make better choices and
decisions in the future.
Create a Mental Distraction
Initially, it might seem difficult to get the embarrassing
events out of your head. In fact, it’s very possible that
you’re actually blowing these events out of proportion in
your imagination. And that’s perfectly okay and
understandable.
In such instances, give yourself permission to distract

yourself temporarily from these unhelpful thoughts. This
will provide you with a bit of time to later reflect on what
happened and learn from your experience.
The most important thing is not to allow these
embarrassing circumstances to eat away at other areas of
your life.
Don’t let your feelings, pain or regrets seep into your

relationships, your career, your health, and the pursuit of
your goals.
There are, of course, numerous harmless ways you can

temporarily distract yourself from these unhelpful thoughts.
For instance, you can distract yourself through exercise, by
socializing or listening to your favorite uplifting music, etc.
It’s important to keep in mind though that these are only

temporary distractions that give you time to settle yourself
down.
Once you’ve settled yourself down, it’s critical that you

take time to think about what just happened and assess the
situation. The more you can learn from this experience,
the better you will do in the future.
As a side note, it’s necessary not to indulge in addictions as
a form of distraction. These types of distractions will often
interfere with critical areas of your life and can actually
complicate matters even further.
Take Time to Contemplate
To grow from any experience, you must learn from that
experience. And, in order to learn from your
experience, you must be open to the possibilities
and willing to change.
Take a moment to think about the events that transpired
that led to the moment of embarrassment. Ask yourself:
What happened?
How did I respond to what happened?
Was I careless or simply unprepared? Why?
What was funny about the situation?
What can I learn from this experience?
What will I do differently the next time around?

Now, consider for a moment whether you were merely
careless or just unprepared. A lack of preparation and
carelessness might very well have been the cause of your
embarrassment.
If you were unprepared, then you might need to prepare
more thoroughly the next time around. That way you will
have a clearer understanding of what you need to do.
If on the other hand, you were careless, then challenge
yourself to become more aware, focused and mindful of the
moment.
Either way, you’re encouraging yourself to think more
thoughtfully about your circumstances, and this can only
help build your self-confidence moving forward.
Seek a Different Perspective on the Situation

So far you’ve probably only viewed your embarrassing
situation from one perspective, which is your perspective.
However, consider the possibility that there are some
different ways you could potentially view this embarrassing
moment. Ask yourself:
How else could I view this situation?
How could seeing things this way be of value?

Just maybe, seeing things as an experiment or as a
performance of sorts may help shift your perspective of the
situation. It doesn’t even matter if these viewpoints make
no sense.
Just maybe, seeing things in a slightly different light will
open up the possibility that things are not as bad as they
initially seemed to be.
This new perspective can subsequently provide you with
the hope you need to approach the situation more
confidently the next time around.
Gain Inspiration from Others
If you’re stuck on ideas and unable to find new and helpful
perspectives to help you reconstruct your embarrassing
moment, then it can be beneficial to have a chat with other
people.
Find a trusted friend and share your embarrassing moment
with them. Let them have a little bit of a chuckle, and
please don’t hesitate to share in their laughter. This
might very well help you relax and settle down your
runaway thoughts.
Once the initial laughter dies down, ask your friend to share
their own embarrassing stories. Just maybe, there are
some valuable lessons within their experience that you
could potentially use to feel better about your own
experience.
We always seem to learn best through stories. When you
share stories of your own life experiences with others, you
learn from the act of sharing and listening to other people’s
perspectives and opinions.
And when others share stories with you, you also learn as
you try and put yourself in their shoes — living through
their experience in your own way.
In the end, you take the lessons and try to apply them to
your own life. That’s how we learn. And that’s how you
must learn to overcome your fear of embarrassment.
Concluding Thoughts
So, there you have it. That’s the essential guide you need to
overcome your fear of embarrassment.
You now know exactly how to prepare yourself for
potential embarrassment, how to deal with embarrassment
in the moment, and how to learn from your experience to
avoid the pitfalls of future embarrassment.
You essentially have a 360 degree understanding of what it

takes to overcome your fear of embarrassment. And now,
it’s time to put these ideas into action.
Start with your imagination. Imagine successfully
handling embarrassing situations in your head before
you experience them in the real world. Then commit
yourself to purposefully putting yourself in awkward
and uncomfortable situations each day.
That’s, after all, the most effective way to strengthen your
anti-embarrassment muscle.
However, like with all muscles, they don’t just suddenly

strengthen overnight. It takes consistent work over an
extended period of time to build your muscles. Which is
why you must commit to the consistent application of these
ideas.
Only through consistent application will you develop

the mental and emotional strength you need to conquer
your fear of embarrassment.

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The Best Way to Deal With

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6 Ways To Move Past An Embarrassing

moments are in the past.

1. Confront The Moment

situation is to directly address it the exact moment when it happens. While

be feeling from an awkward moment. Laugh it off, make a joke, or do a funny

the people around you may feel less awkward, too.

2. Apologize, But Not Too Much

past the embarrassing situation. According to PsychCentral, apologizing for the

off the stress, and move forward.

3. Focus On The Context Of The Memory

only concentrate on what went wrong, you're actually heightening those

suppressing it and steer your attention to other aspects of the situation.

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actually increase insecure emotions, or worse, may even lead to feelings of

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embarrassed essentially comes from not living up to your own standards. If

matters is how you choose to deal with those awkward moments.

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embarrassing moment by laughing it off and forgetting about it.

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What would I do if I said something embarrassing in front of my cousins?

What if I am playing a sport and do something that is incorrect?

What can I do if I get disciplined in front of the whole class?

What should I do if someone keeps on bringing up an embarrassing thing I

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 How do I deal with embarrassing moments in the bathroom?

 How do I deal with someone else who embarrassed me in front of a lot of

 What do I do if my parents are calling me names in public to embarrass