Grade 8 Writing – Lesson 5

Describing People / Animals

A well-written descriptive paragraph can be like a sharp photograph, but also better. While the photo
appeals to the eye of the viewer, a paragraph comes alive in the mind’s eye of the reader. This gives the
writer great advantages over the photographer.
A writer can draw upon all five senses, not merely the visual. A description can portray sound, smell,
touch, and taste, as well as sight.
A writer can show a subject from more than one angle at a time. A description can show a person
happy and sad, an object from the front and back, or a place at night and day.
A writer can show the internal as well as the external aspects of his subject. A description can speak
about feelings of people and the inner workings of nonhuman objects, like volcanoes and wristwatches.
Here is an example of a descriptive paragraph:
She was a slim, tall woman, a little bent, as she kept her head pushed forward in an attitude of
attention, as if she were looking at something, or listening to something, far away. As I grew older, I
came to believe that it was only because she was so often thinking of things that were far away. She
was quick-footed and energetic in all her movements. Her voice was high and rather sharp, and she
often spoke with an anxious accent, for she was exceedingly desirous that everything should go with
due order and correctness. Her laugh, too, was high, and perhaps a little forceful, but there was a
lively intelligence in it. She was then fifty-five years old, a strong woman, of unusual endurance.
Questions:
• What are some details that tell of the woman’s appearance?
• What details tell of her voice? her laugh?
• What details hint at the kind of person she was?

Notice the order in which the writer presents details in his descriptive paragraph. He begins with a
quick, overall description of the woman so that the reader has an immediate impression of her. Then the
author presents certain details of appearance, actions, and sounds that make the character very special.
Some of these details help show the character’s inner self. For instance, keeping her head pushed forward
in an attitude of attention is related to thinking of things that were far away. The woman’s quick-
footedness is related to her energy. Her laugh shows her intelligence.
There seem to be many things to keep in mind as you write a descriptive paragraph. The task is not
very difficult, however, if you go about it in an organized way. Here are some guidelines to use as you
practice writing descriptions.
1. Before you write, give yourself time to observe and to think. Make use of your eyes, ears, nose, and
sense of touch. Use sensory details to re-create the first impression you had.
2. List the details you have observed.
3. Select the details that show the special qualities of the person you want to describe.
4. Arrange your details in an order that is easy to follow. You may choose to use a web to organize these –
probably something like the following.
5. Use language vivid enough to create a clear and colorful picture in the reader’s mind.

carpentry plumbing sink exploded

 fix everything

measles
gentle
FATHER
blue eyes

quiet
long hours of work

shy
college at night

Activity 1
Study the following picture. What do you notice in particular about the person in the picture? How do you
think he would talk? Walk? React to certain situations? List at least 10 descriptive details about him.

Activity 2
List at least 10 details about one of the following people. Some details should reflect your feelings, and
others should reflect the physical appearance of the person or creature.
• an unusual stranger you saw in your town or city
• a reunion with someone you love
• a friend of your mother or father
• an old photograph of you or someone in your family
• an animal you find unusual, mysterious, or dangerous

Activity 3
Consider one of the two lists of details in Activities 1 and 2 above, and use it as a basis to write a
descriptive paragraph.