Nuestra esencia a través de los signos

LIBRA: Lo representa la mariposa. Animal agradable, mimético, capaz de convertirse en lo que

necesite armonía. Deciden mucho la vida de otros, pero muy torpes para tomar sus propias
decisiones. Amor por lo justo y lo armónico, al punto de, a veces, ser huidizos y de no clara
posición. Les apasiona la sensación de armonía, así esté pobremente sustentada. De poco coraje
inicial pero guardan una ira importante que pueden desplegar si los arrinconas. Amantes del arte,
lo sublime y lo bello, en su mejor expresión. No son fáciles de agarrar y menos confrontar. Utilizan
sus polvos cósmicos para desaparecer. Soñadores. Su punto vulnerable son los riñones. Pueden
ser sibaritas incontrolados. La sensación de unirse en pareja, constituye uno de sus sueños
recurrentes. Les encanta agradar, coquetos y enamorados del amor. La justicia es un punto de
honor.

INFP LIBRA
INFP Librans are likely to be attractive and charismatic in a subtle kind of way. They
are probably very tactful and exercise diplomacy in their dealings with others.
Although they are not especially social, they have the ability to be very engaging and
sociable when they want or need to. They desire harmony and possess an idealist
outlook that wants to create the reality of the dreams. They are passionate and loving
and they crave deep and meaningful connections with people. They appreciate
others and tend to see the best in people. They are optimistic but bitter
disappointments can leave them temporarily crestfallen and demoralized. They care
a great deal about their image and they put alot of time into cultivating their own
individual style.

John Lennon (INFP born October 9)

12 Secrets Of The INFP

Personality Type
by Jenn Granneman
Anyone with the INFP or “Mediator” personality cares deeply about other people.
INFPs are unique individuals with a rare set of abilities — including the power to
masterfully understand emotion and the human experience. At their best, INFPs
bring emotional healing to others and inspire incredible change in the world.
INFPs are also rare, making up about 4 to 5 percent of the population.

Are you an INFP? You might be if you identify with these 12 less obvious INFP
personality traits.

(What’s your personality type? Take a free personality assessment.)

Secrets of the INFP Personality Type

1. An INFP needs to feel inspired.
This is one of the core INFP personality traits. INFPs live in a world of emotion and
meaning. They need a certain level of emotional intensity in their life in order to
feel like they are truly living. So INFPs may unconsciously seek out relationships
that evoke strong feelings. Or they may turn to books, poetry, music, travel, or
charity work that inspires them. However, if the passion or intrigue fades, INFPs
may find themselves feeling restless. Dissatisfied, they may move on to another
relationship or project that once again infuses their life with emotion.

2. INFPs are deeply in touch with their values.

Perhaps more than any other personality type, INFPs are deeply in touch with their
personal values, because their dominant mental function is Introverted Feeling.
This means INFPs make decisions by asking themselves, “What feels right for me?”
INFPs are generally nonjudgmental and gentle, but they may find themselves
reacting with anger or defensiveness when someone violates their values. This may
happen when other personality types, such as “Thinking” types like
the ENTJ, INTJ, or ESTJ, demand to know the rationale behind the INFP’s
decision. But INFPs may not be able to offer logical reasons. They made a decision
simply because they felt a certain way. When others criticize them for “not having a
good reason,” the INFP may be left feeling invalidated. If this happens too much,
sadly, the INFP may begin to doubt themselves and their most natural way
of thinking.

3. INFPs want to connect with the essence of life.

Often, INFPs are lovers of nature who spend time outside or in the wilderness.
They do this in an effort to passionately connect with what they see as the basic
essence of life. Especially early in life, INFPs may become lone wanderers, as they
travel and explore one place after another. They’re usually content with rather
simple or Bohemian living arrangements, perhaps furnishing their homes with
second-hand furniture and decor. Extravagant vacations, designer clothes, and fine
meals aren’t a priority for the INFP, who values a simple life of meaning over a life
of material goods.

4. Creative expression is the life blood of an

INFP.
INFPs tend to excel at writing, music, or other forms of creative expression. This is
true for many introverts, but for INFPs it’s because art allows them to express their
deep feelings in an authentic way, explains personality profiler Antonia Dodge, co-
owner of Personality Hacker, in a podcast about INFPs. INFPs may not be able to
articulate their deep, personal feelings to friends and family in passing
conversation, but they can create a painting or write a novel to immerse others in
their emotional experience. It may be an emotional experience related to their own
feelings, the feelings of another person they’ve come in contact with, or on a much
wider scale, the feelings of the human experience in general.

5. INFPs are healers of emotional wounds.

In the Keirsey Temperament system, the INFP personality is nicknamed the
“Healer.” And the nickname fits, because INFPs care deeply about the inner
emotional lives of other people. According to the Keirsey web site, “Their great
passion is to heal the conflicts that trouble individuals, or that divide groups, and
thus to bring wholeness, or health, to themselves, their loved ones, and their
community.” The INFP’s ability to heal springs from their deep understanding of
emotions, their caring nature, and their ability to see things from a unique
perspective.

6. Other people dump their problems on them.

Unfortunately, there can be a downside to being so gentle and outwardly receptive:
other people dump their problems on you. Many INFPs end up in one-sided
conversations in which the other person vents their feelings and complains, while
the INFP listens patiently. Being the dumping ground for other people’s problems
can give INFPs a sense of emotional heaviness, and in fact, many INFPs do have an
air of melancholy about them. Spending time alone, immersed in a creative project
or in nature, can help clear the INFP’s head. And, INFPs can learn to set
boundaries to avoid getting “dumped on” in the future.

7. When INFPs feel passionate about something,

watch out!
INFPs may see themselves as reluctant heroes. One minute they’re strolling
through life, the next minute their passion has been awakened because they’ve
stumbled across a person who needs their help. With their idealism driving them
on, INFPs can be truly unstoppable.

That should be no surprise, given how many famous INFPs there

are. INFPs have accomplished great things—think Joan of Arc, who, as a teenager
with no military training, led the French army to victory over the British during the
Hundred Years’ War.

According to Dodge, other famous INFPs include:

 Princess Diana
 Audrey Hepburn
 Fred Rogers (a.k.a. “Mister Rogers,” possibly the most INFP person ever)
 John Lennon
 Kurt Cobain
 Tori Amos
 William Shakespeare
 Helen Keller
 Isabel Briggs Myers (creator of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator — the original source of
the Myers-Briggs INFP personality profile!)
Likewise, INFPs are often found helping people who are sick, disabled, or in
need, writes Dr. A.J. Drenth of Personality Junkie. INFPs love rescuing the
helpless; for example, they might adopt abandoned pets from an animal shelter or
take up special causes that have affected them personally, such as raising money
for research for a rare disease.

On the other hand, if INFPs don’t feel a sense of conviction, they tend to shut
themselves off from the world. For INFPs, “when it doesn’t matter, it doesn’t
matter. But when it matters…it matters big,” Joel Mark Witt, co-owner of
Personality Hacker, told me.

8. INFPs don’t want just any job.

INFPs are not particularly driven by money or career status. What they really care
about is doing work that aligns with their personal values and allows them to help
others. Because INFPs are highly individualistic, they may feel dissatisfied working
for a company or organization that they don’t personally believe in. INFPs are
motivated by vision and inspiration, so they may become restless and unhappy if
they have to do routine work often.

The ideal career match for an INFP will:

 Allow them to express their individuality

 Takes advantage of their ability to see unique solutions
 Gives them independence in how they do their job — including how and when they
complete projects
As they experiment in life, try new things, and find themselves, INFPs will
inevitably narrow their interests and be better equipped to find work that truly
resonates with them.
9. The people in their lives must share their
values.
INFPs make wonderful partners and friends. They’re loyal, nurturing, and
understanding. Self-aware and often spiritual, INFPs tend to be open-minded and
accepting of other people’s preferences and behavior—as long as their own core
values are not violated. They strongly support their friends’ and partners’
individuality, encouraging them to explore their own ideas and interests. However,
they choose romantic partners and friends carefully—not just anyone will do.
INFPs look for people whose values are similar to theirs. And they need someone
with whom they can create deep emotional intimacy.

10. They shy away from conflict.

INFPs tend to be sensitive and have a strong need for harmonious relationships.
Because of their open, accepting nature, they’re always looking for ways to
compromise and accommodate other people. They are generally quite skilled at
finding creative solutions to interpersonal problems. However, confronting
someone can be difficult for them, so they may ignore problems or keep negative
reactions to themselves.

11. INFPs can lead through inspiration.

INFPs are true introverts who prefer to stay out of the spotlight. They often spend
time alone, immersed in their daydreams or creative projects. They tend to live
quiet, simple lives. But this doesn’t mean that INFPs are not leaders. In fact, INFPs
can be powerful leaders, because they have the ability to profoundly inspire others.
When they tap into their passion, sense of meaning, and natural abilities of creative
expression, they can get others excited about causes they believe in.

12. INFPs can grow by having new experiences.

The INFP’s secondary function, Extroverted Intuition, is a learning process that
“sees behind the curtain,” so to speak. It perceives patterns in the INFP’s
experiences and makes connections that aren’t necessarily obvious or inherent by
definition. It asks, “What if?” and sees possibilities.

The way INFPs can grow on a personal level is by using this process to explore,
make connections, and learn new things. For INFPs, this may mean traveling to
new places, taking classes to learn new skills, joining groups or clubs to meet new
people, or feeding their appetite for new information by reading or exploring the
 arts. The more INFPs have new experiences, the more they will add to their deep
understanding of emotions and the human condition.

Did you enjoy this article? Subscribe to our newsletter just for INFPs to get more
stories like this.

You might like:

 19 Signs That You’re an INFP, the Most Idealistic Personality Type
 9 Things the INFP Personality Absolutely Hates
 7 Difficult Things About Being an INFP
 12 Things an INFP Absolutely Needs to Be Happy
 The Morning Routine of an INFP Personality Type
 INFJ or INFP? 5 Big Ways These Personality Types Are Different

19 Signs That You’re An

INFP, The Most Idealistic
Personality Type
by Jenn Granneman
The INFP is likely the most idealistic of all the 16 Myers-Briggs personality types,
perhaps only rivaled by their extroverted counterparts, the ENFPs. Optimistic and
warm-hearted, people of the INFP personality are always looking to uncover the
good in even the worst of people and situations — earning them the nickname “the
mediator personality.” The INFP tends to be diplomatic, gentle, and articulate.
Possessing an inner flame that burns brightly, INFPs fight passionately for causes
they truly believe in, making the world a better place for us all.

Because INFPs make up only 4-5 percent of the U.S. population, they often feel
misunderstood. Private by nature, they tend to hold back a lot, even from those
closest to them. Many INFPs turn to art or writing to express their private thoughts
and vivid inner world. It’s no surprise that famous INFPs include writers and
entertainers like William Shakespeare, Aubrey Hepburn, Lisa Kudrow, and J.R.R.
Tolkien, among many others.

Do you possess the INFP personality type? If you relate to most of these signs, you
might be an INFP.
Signs You’re an INFP
1. Still waters run deep
Sensitive and caring, you feel things deeply. In fact, your emotional side feels
like the truest you — and you’ve gained your deepest insights from reflecting on it.
However, being an introvert, you don’t usually show just how deep your emotions
run. Quiet and calm, you tend to keep them to yourself, sometimes hiding them
from even those closest to you. Sometimes this leads you to feel isolated and lonely.

2. You have a rich inner world

You often find yourself drifting away into deep thought, as you imagine
hypothetical situations or ponder philosophical questions. You’re drawn to
daydreaming, and you can be quite imaginative. Sometimes you get so lost in your
inner world that you go into “hermit mode,” and your loved ones have to come
looking for you.

3. You put your principles first

When making a decision, you let your principles lead. Forget the pros and cons
chart; you’re more likely to ask yourself, “What feels right for me?” Sometimes this
means you ignore more practical considerations, like time, money, or resources.
For example, you may decide to take the scenic route to get to an appointment —
relishing the natural beauty — only to end up arriving late. INFPs can grow by
striking a balance between their principles and the practical.

4. You have the gift of language

The INFP personality excels at self-expression. Many INFPs are drawn to writing,
poetry, the arts, and music — really, anything that lets them tap their creative side.

5. Art is your truest expression

For INFPs, their art isn’t just about putting beautiful words on paper or creating a
heart-stirring melody. Their art is their purest, most authentic way of expressing
themselves and their ideas about the world. Without a creative outlet of some
kind, the INFP personality will feel unhappy and unfulfilled.
6. You’re definitely an introvert
You enjoy meeting new people and discussing meaningful ideas. Sometimes you’re
even mistaken for an extrovert because you can become very loquacious and
animated when you hit on a topic that you’re passionate about. However, you’re
truly an introvert who needs plenty of time alone. It’s in your alone time that you
recharge your energy, reflect on your experiences, and rediscover your most
authentic self.

7. Your mind is rarely idle

Even when you’re home alone “doing nothing,” you’re usually engaging your brain.
People who share the INFP personality devour books, movies, and music —
especially those that explore the human condition.

8. You seek meaning in everything you do

All your life, you’ve sought meaning and inspiration. Money, status, and power
have never been big motivators for you. For this reason, you’ve always felt a little
out of place. While others exhaust themselves trying to get ahead in life, you’re
quietly trying to understand your place in the world and what it all means.

Sure, just like anyone else, you’d like to have a full bank account and be rewarded
for your accomplishments, but you know that there’s so much more to life than
that. For an INFP, meaning comes first. You live by your principles and seek to
make the world a little more beautiful, fair, and accepting place to be.

9. The simple life is the good life

Because meaning is your first priority, you may live a minimalist or even Bohemian
lifestyle. You couldn’t care less about owning the latest gadget, buying designer
clothes just to elevate your status, or amassing more material goods.

10. You’re an optimist…

Some say you’re too trusting or even naive. But your optimism is a gift. You
approach the world with a child-like curiosity, and you always manage to see the
good in people. Your optimism makes you resilient in the face of hardship, and the
people in your life are refreshed by your positivity.
11. …Who’s prone to melancholy moods
You know the world isn’t perfect. Things often fall short of your ideals, and
meaning and inspiration can be hard to find. Similarly, you crave deep, authentic
connections with others, but these are usually few and far between. Although adept
at looking on the bright side, paradoxically, you may at times struggle with sad or
depressed thoughts.

Sometimes, these melancholy moods have more pragmatic roots. The downside of
not pursuing traditional achievements is that it’s easy to feel like you’re losing out.
If you’re getting underpaid or underappreciated, it’s especially easy to fall into
cynicism. The INFPs who grow out of this are often the ones who chose to do at
least a little planning around their earnings and career — because they start to feel
less taken for granted. The external success is not important on its own, but it helps
protect their inner happiness.

12. Mundane tasks are your worst nightmare

Because you’re an intuitive who’s inspired by new ideas and meaningful
interactions, you find yourself easily bored by mundane, repetitive tasks. For
example, you may neglect your email inbox or have a hard time mustering the
energy to clean your room. It doesn’t bother you if things are a bit disorganized or
haphazard — although for your roommate or spouse, it may be a different story!

13. People see you as flexible and easy-going

As an INFP personality, you feel comfortable with spontaneity. You like having a
loose plan for things, but you’ve never been one to let that plan box you in. If a
better opportunity presents itself — or if you’re just not feeling it — you have no
problem canceling or changing plans last-minute.

14. Your mind is always buzzing with something

new
It could be a lifestyle you’re trying out, a creative project you’re embarking on, or a
philosophy you’re exploring. For you, the fun is in the discovery, and you by no
means feel compelled to rush toward an end. For this reason, you may start many
projects but rarely finish them. Although this means you always have something
interesting going on, it may also mean you struggle to check things off your to-do
list.
15. Healthy INFP relationships
Passionate lovers and hopeless romantics, INFPs are dreaming of the perfect
relationship — a role that may be difficult for anyone to fill. The INFP personality
may even put their partner on a pedestal, idealizing them so much that they miss
glaring red flags. This personality type can grow by understanding that strong
relationships don’t just fall magically into place; they take effort, compromise, and
hard work.

INFPs also tend to be experimental and accepting in relationships, and are one of
the types most likely to try nontraditional arrangements such as polyamory, “open”
marriages, or lifelong cohabitation without marriage.

16. Criticism is a dagger to your heart

What people don’t see is that below your calm exterior, you’re a sensitive
person who really takes things to heart. Harsh words or negative feedback,
especially from those closest to you, can leave you stewing.

17. You avoid conflict

Similarly, you may be conflict-avoidant, because tension and fighting in your
relationships really hurt. Sometimes you avoid speaking up for something you want
or need because you don’t want to cause a problem or hurt someone’s feelings. And
sometimes, it’s just easier to withdraw. The problem is, these responses
work against creating the intimacy you crave. And eventually, you’ll find that
everyone else is getting what they want — except you.

18. The ideal INFP careers

Perhaps no other personality type struggles as much to find a satisfying career as
the INFP. Although intelligent and creative, INFPs will be loathe to “sell their soul”
for just a paycheck. Similarly, they may hate the rigid schedules, inflexible
expectations, repetitiveness, and workplace politics that accompany the typical 9-
to-5 job. For this reason, many INFPs drift from career to career, eventually
succumbing to social and financial pressures and ending up in a job that wasn’t
right for them in the first place.

However, the INFP personality can bring a lot to the table — and there are many
satisfying INFP careers. INFPs often find rewarding work as a professor, author,
designer, freelancer, independent business owner, social worker, counselor,
psychologist, artist, veterinarian, or physical therapist. Really, any career can have
meaning for INFPs if it allows them to creatively solve problems, help others, and
have a degree of independence.

19. People love hanging out with you

You have no desire to control others or have power over them. In a group, you take
a democratic approach; you make sure everyone feels heard and is on board with
whatever decision is being made. Because you’re so independent, you hate being
smothered or held back in any way — so you make an effort not to do that to others.

They won’t always say it, but people love this about you. People of all kinds tend to
feel comfortable and accepted around you, in a way that they just don’t receive
from most others. This, along with your creativity and your passion for your ideals,
is the gift you give to the world.

Are You an INFP?

Some of these signs are things a lot of people will identify with, and every INFP is
going to be a little different. If you can relate to most of them, however, chances are
good that you’re an INFP personality. Want to be one hundred percent sure?
There’s an easy way to find out: Take this free personality assessment from
Personality Hacker and see your personality type in minutes.

8 Problems Only INFPs

Will Understand
by Kumar Shashwat
There are certainly many great things about being INFP, one of the 16 Myers-
Briggs personality types. We’re highly creative individuals who inspire others. We
have a rich inner world that allows us to escape the dryness of a life filled with
routine and structure.

We show an amazing amount of compassion for others, despite being so different

from the rest of the population. We’re deeply sensitive and caring, and the best part
is, we usually don’t expect anything from anyone in return.

Yet, I feel there are a few challenges to being an introverted-intuitive-feeling-

perceiver. Here are eight problems INFPs will understand.

(What’s your personality type? Take a free personality assessment.)

INFP Problems
1. Never really being able to finish anything you
start
We live in a world of endless possibilities, and we INFPs always want to explore
something new. We’re often good at starting something, but we’re rarely able to
finish as we expected — or worse, never at all.

If I were to write a list of things that I had started but left incomplete, I wonder if
even that list would be completed. I have enrolled in tons of online courses over the
years but I haven’t completed a single one. I barely finish any book I buy, and I
don’t think I’ve ever watched a full season of any TV series.

I know our souls don’t know a thing about deadlines, but unfortunately, our bosses
and professors do.

I’ll be completely honest. I was quite excited when I started writing this article, but
now I feel really lucky to have actually finished it.

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newsletter here.

2. Not being assertive enough

When we’re alone, we often find ourselves mentally playing out a conversation with
our best friend in our head. But, paradoxically, when he or she shows up, we go
quiet.

We INFPs have a rich inner world where we often speculate about ideal
possibilities. But sometimes it acts more like a cage and prevents the words within
us from finding their way out.
At times, we’re guilty of not being assertive enough when it really matters — even if
we were really excited and motivated going into the situation.

For example, I often have some problem on my mind that I want to talk about, but
I don’t bring it up, because I don’t want to burden the other person. Other times,
someone hurts my feelings, but I stay quiet, because I don’t want to damage the
relationship.

3. Procrastination
Similar to #1, we INFPs tend to procrastinate to the very end.

For example, in college, I found it impossible to study the day before an exam, even
when I hadn’t yet studied anything. Often, when I had a big project due, I didn’t
start it until the day before the deadline. But even on that day, I barely did
anything.

I wasn’t much different from my peers, except that they actually studied the day
before the exam, and they usually completed projects before the deadline.

4. Over-planning or no planning at all

There are times when we INFPs check out every single book on a subject from the
library, bookmark every single article available on the web, and watch every single
video on YouTube. But we end up being confused and simply can’t figure out how
to start planning our next travel adventure or writing our novel. Then we may
finally realize that all this over-research was simply a way of procrastinating.

And there are times when we simply go with our gut feeling, with little or no
planning at all. We simply move forward without caring about the details (thanks
to our intuitive focus on the big picture), only to realize that we should have done a
bit of research beforehand.

I wish I could be in the middle of this spectrum, but unfortunately, I often end up
being on either extreme.
5. Offering compassion to people who don’t care
about you
I don’t understand why I worry about inconveniencing the store clerk when he
simply walks by and pretends he didn’t hear me. I don’t understand why I felt sorry
for the professor who was correcting my not-so-perfect assignment who never
seemed to care about my education.

I never understand why I feel guilty when I do not buy something from a
salesperson (just because he used a few cute words), even though I know that it’s
his job, and he just cares about his own profit.

When you’re an INFP, you easily slip into other people’s shoes and see things from
their perspective — and this naturally brings empathy. You end up sympathizing
with people even when they don’t have your best interest in mind.

6. Spending your energy constantly validating

yourself instead of focusing on your goals
I don’t know how many I times I just keep telling myself that what I’m doing is
okay, and I should not bother if someone does not like my idea. We INFPs
sometimes move through a cycle of self-doubt instead of working our way toward
our goals.

For example, I want to start my own location-independent business. I know that in

order to do that, I’ll need to do some research and develop some skills. I had this
thought about four months ago, yet here we are — I still have not taken any steps to
get started.

That’s because I’ve been spending most of my time reassuring myself that I’m on
the right track, and I should just focus on the present. Today, I am exactly where I
started. Had I focused on making progress when I first had the idea — instead of
doubting myself — I’d already have something to show.

7. Worrying about helping others when the one

who you should be helping is yourself
Even when we have no idea how we’ll pay our rent, we feel sorry for not giving
money to a homeless person our own way home from being fired from our job.
As an INFP, I simply wish I could just let it go when I come across someone asking
for help. But my highly sensitive soul simply doesn’t allow me to do so. So I end up
helping them, even when it comes at a big cost to me.

8. Having high standards but a low self-esteem

We think that we should be a Pulitzer Prize-winning author, but we may not want
to enroll in a writing course because we feel we do not deserve that sort of luxury.

We think we should be able to code the next Facebook, but we may be afraid of
even trying to learn to code, because we feel we are not worth it.

We realize we need many things to achieve that “something,” but we may feel
unworthy of anything.

And that’s the reason we may feel like we’ve never achieved anything of great
importance. We’re perfectionists. Our high standards can backfire and lead us to
take no action.

Despite all these problems, I love being an INFP — I wouldn’t change it for the
world. I just often find myself laughing at myself and wondering what on earth I
am.

What Is an Introvert? Definition &

Guide to Introversion
Introvert Definition:
The definition of an introvert is someone who prefers calm,
minimally stimulating environments. Introverts tend to feel drained
after socializing and regain their energy by spending time alone. This
is largely because introverts’ brains respond to dopamine differently
than extroverts’ brains. In other words, if you’re an introvert, you
were likely born that way.

How Do I Know if I’m an Introvert?

Have you always felt different?

Do you enjoy spending time alone?

Do you ever feel like you’re the only person who doesn’t need to talk,
talk, talk — or be around people all the time?

If so, you might be an introvert.

Being an introvert is perfectly normal. Despite what your

peers, teachers, and even parents may have told you, being an
introvert doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you—and it’s
not even that uncommon. Studies suggest that 30 to 50 percent of
the U.S. population are introverts. That’s one out of every two or
three people you know.

The result? Even if you’re not an introvert yourself, you likely work
with, are married to, or are friends with an introvert. Most people
know more introverts than they think.

Right now, there’s an introvert revolution going on. Slowly, our

extroverted world is learning to understand and accept the
introvert’s way. But in order to do that, we first need to better
 understand what introversion is — and what it’s not. That’s the
purpose of this guide, and our entire website.

Are you an an introvert? Or, is there an introvert in your life that

you’d like to understand? If so, read on.

Table of Contents
 What Does It Mean to Be an Introvert?
 Are Introverts Shy?
 5 Myths About Introverts
 13 Signs You Are an Introvert
 There’s No Such Thing as a Pure Introvert
 Can an Introvert Become an Extrovert?
 The Gift of Being an Introvert
 How to Thrive as an Introvert
 Learn More About Being an Introvert

What Does It Mean to Be an

Introvert?
The most common definition of an introvert is someone who gets
drained by socializing and recharges by being alone. But there’s so
much more to introversion than that.

Everyone is born with an innate temperament — a way that you gain

energy and prefer to interact with the world. Introversion and
extroversion are temperaments. Whether you’re an introvert or
extrovert is largely determined by your genes — meaning you were
probably born that way.

However, we’re also shaped by our life experiences. If your quiet,

thoughtful ways were encouraged by your parents, teachers, and
others, you probably grew up feeling confident in who you are. But,
like many introverts, if you were teased, bullied, or told to “come out
of your shell,” you may have developed social anxiety or felt like you
had to pretend to be someone you’re not.
 The good news is it’s not too late to work on the things that hold you
back.

Of course, not all introverts are the same. Some introverts will need
only a little bit of alone time to recharge and can handle a fair
amount of social time before feeling drained. Others drain quickly
and prefer to spend very long periods alone. It’s different for each
person, and many introverts are somewhere in the middle.

Sooner or later, however, all introverts will experience the dreaded

“introvert hangover,” which is the feeling of being completely wiped
out from too much “people time” or stimulation. This can mean
feeling fatigued, unable to concentrate, or even grouchy. It’s as if
your brain has used up all its mental energy and just doesn’t haven’t
any left. (And, in fact, that’s exactly what has happened.)

The result is that most introverts share certain characteristics:

 We’d rather stay home most nights than go out to one social event
after another.
 We enjoy quiet, solitary activities like reading, writing, gaming,
gardening, or drawing.
 We’ll usually choose the company of a few close friends over a wild
party.
 We do our best work alone.
 Many of us will avoid small talk or other unnecessary social
interactions.

Are Introverts Shy?

Some introverts are and some aren’t. This is probably the single most
misunderstood thing about being an introvert.

The truth is that being shy and being an introvert are two totally
different traits:
 Being shy means you get very nervous and self-conscious in social
situations. Both introverts and extroverts can have this trait — not all
natural-born extroverts run around chatting with strangers!
 Being introverted means socializing wears you out. You might not
be nervous or shy at all. In fact, many introverts enjoy socializing (as
long as it’s meaningful!). And some even get misidentified
as ambiverts or extroverts. But since it will eventually tire you out,
you probably avoid extra social time when you can.
Compare social stamina to running. If extroverts are marathon
runners, introverts are sprinters. That doesn’t mean that introverts
don’t like running (er, social time). It just means we have to conserve
our energy.

5 Myths About Introverts

Unfortunately, many people don’t fully understand what it means to
be an introvert. They equate introversion with shyness, depression,
or social anxiety. When introverts go quiet, we are wrongly accused
of being stuck up, angry, or disinterested. And when we spend time
alone, we are often accused of being antisocial or selfish.

For most introverts, these misconceptions couldn’t be further from

the truth. Here’s the truth behind the five worst stereotypes:

1. Introverts are not necessarily socially awkward. Just like

shyness, social awkwardness is a separate trait from introversion.
Many introverts can actually be quite charismatic in social
situations. (In fact, introverts account for 60 percent of all lawyers, a
profession that requires quite a bit of confidence speaking in front of
others.)
2. Introverts don’t hate people. An introvert’s lack of chitchat is
often misinterpreted. People take it as a sign that we don’t like
others. The truth is the opposite. Introverts often avoid small talk
because we consider it to be inauthentic. We crave a more
meaningful connection with the people we talk to.
3. Introverts aren’t rude. Yes, if an introvert is completely out of
social energy, we might start getting a little crabby or simply zone
out. But we’re not trying to be rude — and we’ll be a lot more friendly
if you give us some time to recharge alone.
4. Introverts don’t need be “fixed.” Being an introvert is part of
who we are, and it can be a source of brilliance. We are at our best
when we embrace our nature and use it as a source of strength.
5. Introverts don’t (usually) wish we were extroverted. Sure,
sometimes introverts envy an extrovert’s ability to think quickly or fit
naturally into a social situation. But we also take great delight in our
inner world and our alone time. Introverts have many strengths that
don’t come naturally to extroverts, and we wouldn’t trade them for
the world.

13 Signs You Are an Introvert

Every introvert is unique, but there are some signs you’re an
introvert that are pretty telling. Here are 13 signs that you might be
an introvert:

1. You enjoy spending time alone

Most introverts enjoy social time too, but all introverts enjoy the
solitude of spending time alone. If alone time feels refreshing,
peaceful, and helps you recharge, you’re probably an introvert.
2. Certain types of socializing drain you
It’s possible that not all social settings affect you the same way. But
with new people, large crowds, or in noisy environments, you
probably get wiped out fast. Stay out too long and you may even
crash — a.k.a. the “introvert hangover.”
3. You do your best work alone
Introverts rarely work well in crowded environments. The more
secluded you are, the more likely you are to focus deeply and
produce great work. You may feel more creative, focused, or
productive, or you may simply be able to do more in a shorter time.
 It doesn’t mean you can’t work on teams, but you like to retreat
somewhere quiet once the collaborating is done. In an open office,
noise-canceling headphones are your friend.
4. You’d rather hang out with a few close friends
than a large group of people
It’s a myth that introverts don’t like to socialize. Sitting with a few
close friends, you may enjoy chatting all night, and you may even
“seem” like an extrovert. For whatever reason, these types of
interactions don’t drain you the way others do. But once you get to a
party or large group setting, you know it’s only a matter of time
before you feel wiped.
5. You have a vivid, rich inner world…
You might spend a lot of time pondering, and even dreaming. Or,
you might just prefer to think things through before you act. Not
every introvert is a dreamer or creative, but almost all have an entire
inner world that they find just as comfortable as the world around
them
6. …and you’re often “in your head”
Sometimes, you get caught daydreaming, or you get flak from
coworkers who are quicker to act with less planning. You might even
have been told to “get your head out of the clouds” — or you may
simply tend to zone out during a conversation and pursue your own
thoughts. It’s not that the word around you isn’t interesting. It’s just
that what you’re imagining or thinking about is
even more interesting.
7. You prefer to stay out of the spotlight
There are exceptions to this, but many introverts prefer not to speak
up in large group settings — and would rather hand off speaking
roles to someone else. Of course, many introverts are creatives and
performers, and some even love getting on stage. Others are business
leaders who speak in front of teams or audiences all the time.
Introverts are fully capable of learning and mastering these skills,
 but if your natural inclination is to avoid group participation, you
may be an introvert.
8. You can “network,” but you feel like you’re
faking it
If you hate small talk, and you also hate having to talk to strangers,
then networking is just about the least comfortable thing you can do
— and that’s exactly how most introverts feel. That doesn’t mean you
can’t do it when it’s necessary for work or business, but if given a
choice, you’d schedule your next networking event for sometime in
2089.
9. You don’t always know what to say
Instead, you routinely find yourself thinking of the right
response after the conversation is over. This is normal: many
introverts struggle with word retrieval (the ability to choose the right
words on the fly).
10. You’re better at writing your thoughts than
speaking them
You may or may not be a natural novelist, but if writing something is
more comfortable than saying it in person, it’s a strong sign you’re an
introvert. Introverts take time to think about what we want to say,
and while that can slow down a live conversation, it makes for very
clear and expressive writing.
11. You dive deep, both in your relationships
and interests
What exactly do you do with that alone time you like to have? It’s
time for self-reflection, of course! You might spend it thinking about
your life, the people you love, your career, or the “big questions” in
life. Or, you might spend it reading, researching, or creating art. All
of these things give you a tendency to go deeper than others into the
topics and pursuits that interest you. (Of course, you also spend
some of that time just relaxing and recharging.)
12. You seek meaning
 When you’re the type of person who thinks deeply about your world,
it’s hard to settle for shallow relationships, shallow goals, or shallow
conversation. If you seek a sense of meaning in your job and your
relationships, and prefer meaningful conversation over small talk, it
could be a sign you are an introvert.
13. You feel out of place in an “extroverted”
society
Extroverts often don’t notice it, but our society assumes that people
should be chatty, social and quick to speak up — pretty much all the
time. Did you feel pressure to talk more even at a young age? Did you
always feel out of place, or even wonder if there was something
wrong with you for not being more social? This single factor may be
the biggest sign you’re an introvert.
These are just some of the signs of an introvert, and not every
introvert will match all of them. But if you — or someone you love —
matches most of them, it’s a pretty strong sign. Want even more?
Check out 21 Undeniable Signs You’re an Introvert.

There’s No Such Thing as a Pure

Introvert
No two introverts are exactly alike. What’s true for one introvert may
be be quite different for another. Each introvert has a different level
of tolerance for socializing and other types of stimulation.

Above all, there is no such thing as a pure introvert or extrovert.

“Such a man would be in the lunatic asylum,” the famous
psychotherapist Carl Jung once noted. Introversion and extroversion
are on a spectrum, meaning, they are not all-or-nothing traits.
Everyone acts introverted at times and extroverted at other times.
It’s all about what your preference — in general — tends to be.

If you’re not sure whether you’re more of an introvert or more of an

extrovert, you can take the introvert quiz and find out.
 Can an Introvert Become an
Extrovert?
There are two answers to this:

1. No, introverts cannot become extroverts.

2. Why would we want to?
Why we can’t: The research is clear that introverts express their
temperament from a young age. In fact, one study by psychologist
Jerome Kagan found that it’s possible to predict which babies will
grow up to be introverted based on their reaction to stimuli at just
four months old. In other words, if you have an introverted nature,
you’re likely to be that way from birth and remain that way
throughout your life.

Why we don’t want to: This speaks to a deeper truth about

introverts. There are plenty of introverts out there who wish they
could be more outgoing, but this isn’t the same thing as becoming an
extrovert. Introverts, like everyone, can practice their social skills
and become more capable in social situations. But it won’t change
the fact that those interactions drain us.

But, if you’re hoping to become more social, there’s good news:

 There is definitely such a thing as an outgoing or “extroverted”

introvert…
 …and introverts can learn social skills and get good at them with
practice.
There are lots of charming introverts out there, from major stars like
Lady Gaga, Audrey Hepburn and Johnny Depp to many of the warm,
friendly and charismatic introverts we’ve met thanks to the
Introvert, Dear community. For most of us, becoming comfortable in
social situations has simply been a matter of practice—even if it
seemed impossible once.
Remember: your quiet nature is part of who you are—and it’s a
good thing. Introverts who embrace their nature tend to flourish.

They are happier, have better relationships, do better work, and

enjoy life because their minds are well-rested and their energy level
is high. The best thing you can do if you’re an introvert is not try to
change it, but to take the alone time you need and let your vast inner
world work for you.

The Gift of Being an Introvert

Many introverts grow up feeling out of place. We live in a fast, noisy
world that sees chattiness as a virtue. Many introverts worry from a
young age that something is wrong with them.

But being an introvert is a gift.

The world has a need for people who go deeper, think before they
act, and look at things in new ways.

The world has a place for people who value meaningful

relationships over meaningless small talk.

And the world is ready for thoughtful, contemplative people who

bring calm and wisdom to a room.

These are traits that introverts offer. And, precisely because the
world has so many extroverts, when you step into these traits and
own them, you will find that people appreciate you — and value you.

Why? Well, we’re not all the same, but depending on the introvert,
introverts are…
There is an old saying that the person who says the least is also
the wisest.

Introverts aren’t born any wiser than anyone else, but we do have an
advantage. We are built to do the kind of contemplation that turns
into great insight over time.

How to Thrive as an Introvert

Introverts can be successful in any walk of life.

There are introverts who are famous actors and politicians. There are
introvert CEOs, pop stars, authors, and engineers. And introverts,
like everyone, can find happiness in love, in family, in spirituality or
in learning — or in whatever gives them purpose. What’s different
about introverts is what we have to do to tap into our talents and
thrive:

We have to work with our introversion rather than fight

against it.

That might mean turning down social invites. It might mean

focusing on the friends you value most instead of trying to be
everything to everyone. It might mean finding a way to get more
solitude at work — especially in an open office.

And, most important, it might mean trusting your instinct

about what you really need to be happy. Once you do that, you will
stop feeling worn out or uncertain — and you’ll start seeing your
genius come through.

Learn More About Being an Introvert

To learn more about being an introvert, we recommend the
bestselling book, The Secret Lives of Introverts: Inside Our Hidden
World, by Introvert, Dear founder Jenn Granneman.

Also, we recommend starting with these articles:

Introverts Don’t Hate People, They Hate Shallow Socializing

12 Things Introverts Absolutely Need to Be Happy

The Science Behind Why It Can Be Hard for Introverts to Put Their
Thoughts Into Words