DEVELOPING AN EXCELLENT TEENAGER

TEXT OF PAPER PRESENTED BY ROTARIAN AKIN OLAWORE AT THE

CHARTER PRESENTATION CEREMONY OF THE INTERACT CLUB OF
ZINNA COLLEGE, IKEJA ON SATURDAY 10TH DECEMBER 2005

It gives me great pleasure to be here today at your charter presentation. I count myself

lucky to have found myself intertwined with the fate of the club.

It was in my time as President of the Rotary Club of Ikeja in 2003/2004 that the charter

was processed but somehow the certificate was not prepared by Rotary International and

then it was my lot again as District Secretary in 2005 to reprocess that is, the Charter

Certificate we are presenting today.

I congratulate the Interactors and much more the proprietress Chief (Mrs.) Ismail in

whose veins blood of service flows and the indefatigable coordinator, a mother and a

wife, whose doggedness and dedication has helped the club to continue to wax stronger –

Mrs. T. A. Ojo.

PREAMBLE

A teenager is a boy or girl in the teen-age, who is between the ages of 13 and 19, and

developmentally this can be stretched between 12 and 20 year olds.

In human development science, there are 3 stages of emotional development the id, ego

and the super ego.

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In the early stages of development we exhibit id, which is a subconscious phenomenon.

That perhaps explain why toddlers are unmindful of their environment in their quest or

desires.

At later stage, within which the teenager falls, the id develops into ego. For most

philosophers the ‘ego’ is an ‘inhabitant’ of consciousness. It is claimed that it is at the

centre of desires and acts, in each moment of our psychic life (Jean-Paul Sartre – The

transcendence of the Ego: Sketch for a phenomenon logical description (1937). It is

therefore no wonder that this is the age of adventure, desire to try out discoveries during

the transition from id to ego.

It is also no wonder that a teenager desires independence and freedom, displays big

“ego”.

The Superego is the final stage, a stage of maturity, a stage of seen-it-all. But can we

reach a comfortable Superego level without ego? This marks the conflict of the adult and

the teenagers.

TEENAGERS AS THE FUTURE OF TOMORROW

No doubt today’s leaders were yesterday’s teenagers, circumstances of development may

be different.

Today is jet age. There seems to be a race against time; family values are breaking down

because parents could no longer afford the quality time required to understand the

children. Coercion and parental blackmail borne out of environmental stress had taken

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the place of obedience through love and affection. The teenager therefore looks

elsewhere – outside the home - for comfort, love, adventure and acceptability.

Mathew Fox in The Coming of the Cosmic Christ as quoted by Nanette J. Davis – Youth

Crisis: Growing up in the High Risk Society (1999) said

“I believe that our civilization, far from honouring our youth and
celebrating them, consumes and devours them…… In this failure
to honour our children and the child within lies one of the most
critical dangers of our epoch…… and ironically one of the most
powerful sources for a global renaissance (because) in fifteen
years…...over 50% of the human race will be under fifteen years of
age”. (we are here to honour you).

This may seem a bit exaggerated but take a look at the Nigerian situation and especially

with average life span of about 40 years. 45% in 1998

The population structure of Nigeria by ages as at 1998:

2010 NIGERIAN POPULATION DISTRIBUTION BY AGE

110532000 1998 BASE FIGURE PROJECTED AT 3% p.a. GROWTH RATE

PERCENTAGE
AGE 1998 TOTAL PERCENTAGE SIZE 2010 TOTAL SIZE

00-04 19,737,000 18% 24,706,000 16%

05-09 16,286,000 15% 22,070,000 15%
10-14 13,510,000 12% 19,682,000 13%
15-19 11,721,000 11% 16,988,000 11%
20-24 9,516,000 9% 13,928,000 9%
25-29 7,857,000 7% 11,435,000 8%
30-34 6,600,000 6% 9,005,000 6%
35-39 5,426,000 5% 7,012,000 5%
40-44 4,456,000 4% 5,718,000 4%
45-49 4,041,000 4% 4,718,000 3%
50-54 3,460,000 3% 3,877,000 3%
55-59 2,677,000 2% 3,366,000 2%
60-64 2,010,000 2% 2,870,000 2%
65-69 1,469,000 1% 2,112,000 1%
70-74 973,000 0.9% 1,438,000 1%
75-79 531,000 0.5% 852,000 0.6%
80+ 262,000 0.2% 499,000 0.3%
TOTAL 110,532,000 100% 150,276,000 100%

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 20%
18%
16%
14%
12%
1998 TOTAL
10%
2010 TOTAL
8%
6%
4%
2%
0%
00- 05- 10- 15- 20- 25- 30- 35- 40- 45- 50- 55- 60- 65- 70- 75- 80+
04 09 14 19 24 29 34 39 44 49 54 59 64 69 74 79

Graphical representation of Nigerian population by distribution

Source: US bureau of the census, international database

SOCIAL CHALLENGES OF THE TEENAGER

The most advanced economy and whose lifestyle our teenager especially is copying is the
United States of America. But pause to consider this.

Every year, an estimated two million juvenile prostitutes between ages of 5 and 15 in the
United States enter the market.

According to the U.N Children’s fund, there are tens of millions of children in the
international prostitution market. The children are exposed to abuse, molestation, gang
violence and bully.

U.N statistics have also shown that 13 million children under the age of 13 have no adult
supervision before or after school. Paying for day care would use up all or most of a
mother’s wages.

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WHERE THEN LIES THE REFUGE?
The refuge, by the design of human and divine nature lies in the following:
(a) Family
(b) School
(c) Poltiical Order
(d) Peer
(e) Self

FAMILY
According to G.Duby, in his French book, “The family is the first refuge in which the
threatened individual takes shelter”.
The family unit is unique and divine. Nobody had a choice of the child he/she wants nor
a choice of family, he would be born unto. We all knew each other on earth but the pains
and joy of child birth, the ecstatic feeling of being a parent create the parent-child bond
which gets reciprocated as the child sees the mother especially, as the source of comfort.

In African culture, especially years past, nobody needed to preach baby friendliness. It
was embedded in our culture and way of life.

The family setting provides the background for learning and imbibing, the school used to
be only an extention.

Hence, psychologists had recognized that child’s early development both

environmentally and socially at home determined to a large extent the type of an adult
such a child would be.

THE SCHOOL
The centre piece of human socialization and development is learning – the gathering of
knowledge equips people to manage their existences, to enhance their acquisition of
rewards; to minimize the experience of punishment, frustration of failure and in the
extreme to ensure their survival.

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The school focuses the teenager; expands his/her vision and entrench possibilities and
can-do attitude.

An outward display of love, encouragement and positive disposition by a teacher helps to

gain the trust and attention of the child.

The teacher is also a great influence over the child but there must be a complimentary
blend between the home and school in the development process, in order not to leave the
child bewildered in a confused adult world.

A loved child exudes self confidence and is unafraid of self expression.

THE POLITICAL ORDER

It is expected that the state will also protect the child, hence the Youth Bill of Rights.
However, it has been found that conflict may arise from the need to discipline and mould
a child and the bill but it must be stated and understood that the Bill was to protect abuse
of children not to destroy their lives through inability of parents and teachers to discipline
them.

The state however had failed in the provision of good education, transportation, access to
health and food, liberty, safety, survival etc. as enshrined in the Bill of Rights.

The preponderance of child labour and kid street hawkers is a vivid manifestation of this
failure.

There is therefore a strong need for parents to slowdown, have a rethink and create more
quality time for their children. The family unit has to be re-awakened again.

PEER

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When a teenager is confused, he/she follows a leader of the gang. The leader displays
exuberance, high sense of adventure but false sense of knowledge which an unsuspecting
but unprotected teenage laps on. The result is cultism, by whatever guise.

SELF
Where all else fails, we breed recluse, complete anti social, a teenager at war with self
and society.

A dangerous specimen to inherit the leadership of state. Our collective future therefore is
in jeopardy if nothing is done now! The ball is squarely back to the FAMILY court
where it all begins and shall end.

WHAT SHOULD THE FAMILY DO?

The family: The family here now is omnibus.

(a) The economic stress especially of today has created parents that have
placed the training of their children in the hands of housemaids. If the
housemaid knew any better will she be one? Please let us slow down and
take interest in the development of our children, get to know them,
inculcate high moral values and standards and let them see the value and
virtue of their names.

(b) School
The school is an extention of home and a family setting of sort. Teachers
are supposed to be moulders of minds - young and impressionable.
Teenagers spend over 60% of their time with teachers of one form or the
other. It is therefore a sacred duty of the teachers in spite of all else to be
diligent and good examples to the children. These are our leaders of
tomorrow, so it is in our interest to mould our tomorrow through them.
The teachers of failed leaders are not immune from the sufferings
unleashed by such leaders, so teachers also have a chance to create their
reward on earth rather than in heaven.

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 (c) The Rotary Family
We are gathered here today under the auspices of the Rotary family.
Rotary in realizing the importance of the family created a catch them
young approach. It is a system of succesion and sustainability so that good
values that will pass the 4-way test and create a home, country and the
world we all desire will forever be entrenched. Many more men and
women of service will be available to improve society as the time goes by.

Let me quickly share with non-Rotarians what is the 4-Way test:

Of the things we THINK,SAY or DO
Can be applied profitably in relation with others in the home, community,
Business, national & international life, particularly to proposed plans,
policies, statements and advertising in business and the professions, to
proposed legislation in government, to relations between teachers and
students in schools.

1. Is it the Truth?
2. Is it Fair to all concerned?
3. Will it build Goodwill and better Friendship?
4. Will it be Beneficial to all concerned?

The Rotary family of service is set up through:

Rotary Club – 25+ (Adults)
Rotaract Club -18-30 (Youth)
Interact Club – Secondary School age (14-18)

It has various leadership and value development programmes to mould and keep the
minds of teenager and youngsters focused on their studies, improvement of leadership
skills, inculcation of spirit of service.
Through projects, Interactors develop a network of friendships and opportunity for
international relationship. They often spearhead the formation of Rotaract Clubs and also

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often go on to become Youth Exchange students or Ambassadorial Scholars, both
programmes organized by the Rotary Foundation and of international flavour.

I will like to appeal to parents here to encourage their children and ward within the age
bracket to join hands with the Interact Club of Zinnia College.

I dare say Rotary is good Interact is super.

CONCLUSION
In conclusion, there is no gainsaying the fact that to develop an excellent teenager is a
task for all of us. Parents and children but more for parents. They need our love,
acceptance, understanding, time and guidance more than the money we give. It is what
we sow today that we will reap tomorrow.
“For we can do nothing substantial towards changing our course on the planet, a
destructive one, without rousing ourselves, individual by individual, and bringing
our small imperfect stones (of activities) to pite”
Alice Walker –Anything We love Can be Saved

Let me borrow the words of James Hillman in “The Soul’s Code: In search of character
and calling to call you to service in this crusade:
“A restructing of perception is what I am after in this piece. I want us to
see the child we were, the adult we are and the children who
require us in, one way or another in a light that shifts the valences from
curses to blessing or if not blessing at least symptom of calling”

That Nigeria may progress, let us build EXCELLENT TEENAGERS.

Thank you.
Akin Olawore
PP ROTARY CLUB OF IKEJA
DISTRICT SECRETARY
RI D 9110 NIGERIA