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are because we have both an impulse for good as well as an impulse for domination in our lives. The battle ground of these two impulses is often emerges in the realm of sexuality though it is not limited to this aspect of human behavior. Sex can be positive and beautiful - a source of sanctification but when it is allowed to go unchecked and uncontrolled, it can demean, humiliate and destroy. So here was the great insight of the sages. They understood that the very qualities that make a great leader can also be the source of their destructive behavior. King David, the man who wrote psalms and was singer of God's praise could also commit adultery and murder. When Abaye sees the young couple part ways, he comes to the realization that the destructive and sinful behavior he saw in others was really his own. When the Talmud tells us that he leaned against a doorpost in despair, I wonder whether he was putting his head next to the Mezuzah, searching for strength from God. At that moment Abaye, who was so self-assured self righteous (like many of our politicians and leaders), came to the realization that he did not have the power to reign in his own desires and inclinations. It is against this background that we can understand the first steps in Alcoholics Anonymous toward sobriety. Members of Alcoholics Anonymous are asked to commit themselves to twelve statements or steps in order to become sober. The Alcoholic must begin by acknowledging that he is not in control of his own life. He say: "We admit we were powerless over alcohol - that our lives had become unmanageable. We have come to believe that a Power greater than ourselves can restore us to sanity." I believe that this might be a helpful model for understanding Congressman Weiner's behavior. Anthony Weiner is not necessarily a bad person, but he is an addict. He has no control over his own impulses. He has lost the ability to be self-reflective or self-critical. And those are the first steps toward living a responsible life. Until he acknowledges this, he will be prone to self-destructive behavior. We can condemn Anthony Weiner but I wonder how many of us are not so different from him in some ways? If Weiner deserves to resign it is not because of his inappropriate use of the internet; it is because he lied to the public. We have every right to expect honesty and integrity from our leaders. When he lied to the public, he broke the public trust. For sexting on the internet, Weiner needs help. For being incapable of taking responsibility for his actions he must be held accountable. Again consider King David. When David commits adultery with Bathsheba, David's yetzer harah gets the better of him. But when he is confronted with his sin by the prophet Nathan, David immediately acknowledges that what he did was wrong. "I have sinned against the Lord." There are still consequences but David is not impeached like his predecessor because he can take responsibility for his actions. I'd like to suggest that the one of the central issues that Judaism tries to address is not just 'sin' but selfdestructive behavior. We see this quite dramatically in today's Torah portion. After months of preparation for their journey, Israel takes leave of Mount Sinai. They are only weeks away from the Promised Land - and yet their journey is ill fated. No sooner do they begin traveling they rebel. They complain. They question Moses leadership. Even Moses has a crisis of leadership. It is almost as if they are intent on causing their journey to fail. These incidents culminate with the story of the spies who return from Canaan with a mixed report of what they will face. Again Israel rebels. It almost as if Israel doesnt want to reach the Promised Land. Their actions are not so much sinful as they are sabotage. When I look at leaders like Anthony Weiner and I wonder whether to some extent they are out to sabotage their own lives for complex psychological and emotional reasonsThere is a poem in our Yom Kippur liturgy that makes just this point: Whom can I accuse of whom revenge demand, when I have born deep suffering at my own hand?
Other hearts have held hatred for me, but my own heart hates me more than anyone knows My body bears the wounds of relentless foes, but none can match my self-inflicted wounds. I have been seduced for my destruction but none have lured me like my own eyes. I have been burned by countless fires but none compare with the heat of my desires. I'd like to suggest that we are in one of those rare teachable moments. We need to talk about Anthony Weiner with our families and especially with our children and grandchildren. The issue here is not Anthony Weiner or the political future of New York but you and me. How do we make sane choices in our lives? How do we use the impulses and inclinations with which we are endowed to create a better world rather than misery and unhappiness? The internet is a powerful tool but it can also be a destructive weapon - what responsibilities do we have in the way we use it? In a world where there are very few boundaries, how do we decide how to affirm life rather than destroy life? The issue here is not about sin as much as it is about self-destructive behaviors. We like to say, It is a free world; what I do in the privacy of my life is no one else's business as long as 'I'm not hurting anyone else.' But that is not true. Our lives are not ours alone. And we have seen quite dramatically that there is no such thing as private and public in the world, particularly when it comes to the internet. Teenagers often dont understand this - and Weiner is a cautionary tale that we need to learn. Frankly, I'm angry at Anthony Weiner but I also feel sorry for him. His fall from power is nothing less than a tragedy. But I'm more concerned about our lives and the choices we make every day. We live in a mine field. It is so easy to fail, to give in to desire, to cheat, to allow ourselves to become addicted to destructive behaviors. None of us are immune. We all have a Yetzer Harah: that is a fact. The question is whether we choose to use it to sanctify or sabotage the world and our own lives. Shabbat Shalom