From Switzerland to Viet Naam, overland, 2005.

Part Seven: H Ni 20th February 2005 Well, I arrived 24hrs ago, but I really was the equivalent of jet-lagged yesterday, after having been turfed out of the train for 2hrs on one side of the border, then 2hrs on the other side of the border in the middle of the night... ...and probably it's because it's the end of the trip. Even when I was in Beijing I was in transit, mentally, and therefore still looking and going forward. The hotel's nice. Usual kind of thing, unless you're stopping in a luxury pile; but it's comfortable. It's been renovated recently and seems to be the most modern of the minor chain called 'Camellia'. One other member of our team is staying here in Camelia IV, while others are (or will be) in Camelia II and Camellia I. They're all within a couple of hundred yards of each other, right in the centre of The Old Town. According to the booklet beside my bed, there are still remnants of the old city walls and from my balcony I can see over the tops of the nearby buildings to the much more modern constructions outside the 'Vieux Quartier'. I have a large room, well-stocked ice box and a large metal bathtub in a very large bathroom. The tub is a bit chipped, but there's hot, hot water and I had a total immersion hot bath yesterday when I arrived; and that was for the first time in many months! My wife and 3 children are all on the small side and make the most of the bathroom, off my daughter's bedroom. But our bath is too small for me so I can't lie down in it, or cover myself completely, so I have to make do with the shower. But here -luxury, luxury, luxury- I am able to lie down full length, disappear under the surface, blow bubbles and hear the gurgles of the antiquated plumbing... which is a real plus. Now all I have to do is find myself a competent masseur or masseuse and I should be able to relax to perfection. ************** They had breakfast waiting for me at the hotel after my train arrived yesterday, which was thoughtful of them. I had a short walk of exploration and then met Natalie from Berlin, who will be giving the 'Game Show' and 'Music Show' courses. Marcus, who will be running the journalism and 'TV News' courses, arrives tonight... and Costa comes back tonight as well, so we shall probably all meet up tomorrow morning. Natalie and Marcus both work for German television in Berlin, and our team leader, Costa (Greek/Swiss), lives just up the lake from me in Vevey. The other two members who will come in a couple of weeks are Alastair Owen (sound and video editing) from the Midlands but works in Berlin, and Claude Mangold (Management & Financing) who, like Costa and myself, has dual nationality (French/Swiss). ************** 2 across: "Declaration that could bind you, him and me in a concrete way" (13). I've just finished the crossword that I started in the train corridor before we reached Nanning; I particularly liked the 2 across. Answer: PRONOUNCEMENT. **************

I've just had (a rather late) lunch across the road from what will be Costa's hotel at 'Il Padrino': Penne alla putanesca and a glass of rather nice Italian house wine. The owner is on his annual extended Christmas break in Verona, but he seems to have taught his Vietnamese chef well, as the meal was more than acceptable. On the expensive side: about $1.50... ************** The rest obviously did me a lot of good, because my inbuilt sense of direction has kicked in and I already have a fair idea of which roads take me where. Natalie had been here for 10 days, but is still attached to her street plan. This evening I just had some snacks off the street. Some Viet Naamese spring rolls, not cold ones like we make at home, but deep fried; a glass of 'bia hoi' (bare huyee) which is brewed daily and is very light and refreshing. It was originally introduced by the Czechs, but the people here have made it their own. It's incredibly cheap, so that the Viet Naamese could go on inexpensive benders if they wished, but the only people staggering around the streets are people from our 'culture'. I then came home and crashed out on my bed to watch 'Harry Potter 2' on HBO Asia. ************** I don't want to go off down South. I've decided that even though it would be much warmer and it would be nice to lie in the sun, there's so much 'atmosphere' here in Ha Noi, it's so different from what I remember of Sai Gon in the 1960s... I know that's nearly 40 years ago, but Costa sent me some SMSes from Ho Chi Minh City describing something very close to my remembered feelings in 1967 & '68.... still very Americanizzzed and the attitudes very different from Ha Noi. The people here are kind, happy, gentle, warm, playful and very attractive. People will haggle with you, but I have already noticed that, once the price is fixed, they are scrupulous over money matters. Tomorrow I shall start to explore on foot outside the Old Quarter and, after a quick glance at a map, use my inbuilt radar to find the VTV Training Center where I shall be working on 'TV Series, Serials & Soap Operas' after I come back from the 2 week Documentary course in Cua Lo. The most striking differences between Beijing and Ha Noi both have to do with communication. The Chinese keep a very overt control over electronic communication and, at the moment, the only TV channels available are all Chinese (I must find out what's happened in Hong Kong and whether they still have a relatively liberal TV policy and if they do whether the programmes are piped to the the rest of China). I know there's very strict control of the Internet. But I'm sure they already realise that that is something that will have to change drastically before the 2008 Olympics. Here in Ha Noi, hotels large and small have cable TV and offer free internet access. And every 4th shop in the Old Town is an Internet Cafe. They're open all day, and people are gaily waiting their turn (I wouldn't really call it queueing!). Just the sheer numbers make it impossible for the government

-any government- to monitor these communications. And the absolute joy of so many of the people in the streets equates very badly with stereotype image that our Kissing Cousins insist is the real, unacceptable face of communism. The 3 million that gave their lives in the 'American' War earned the right for the population to live their freedom in their own way. There are probably still many forms of restrictions not too visible to a newcomer like me, but the people on the street have embraced their form of the market economy with so much energy and drive, that things are changing exponentially. There's Johnny Depp, Geoffrey Rush & Orlando Bloom on the OTHER station that shows new films in original language. So, armed with a rum and coke from my fridge, I wish you goodnight. ************** 21st February 05 A morning well spent getting my bearings. It was a wise choice to take the hotel in the Vieux Quartier rather than the 'all mod coms' places outside the old city walls. As I haven't touched base with my 'travelling Email adress' since I left Bussigny on the 6th, I started off this morning by hanging around the hotel foyer in order to get onto the net. But there are only two computers, so, even though we are all 'offered' an hour of free computer time each day, the reality is rather different. The hotels are full of people who who have just arrived from or just going to Sapa, or one of the other centres of trekking, boating, hiking or cycling. So most of them are either rushing to send off messages before they disappear for a few days, or rushing to catch up on what has happened to the world since they lost contact. Same effect as people panic-buying before a bank holiday weekend! I'll try again late tonight. ************** It's Monday night, from the 21st to 22nd. We had our first meeting with VTV -Mr Van and his assistant, Quang- and one of my two interpreters: Trung (Chung) who turns out to be the Assistant Manager of training (and will be working into and out of French)... which is possibly why he seems to be pissed off with the whole situation of being put in a menial position. They said once more that they wanted to have everything that we had brought, so that participants could view it all (and then possibly not even turn up for the course). We had already said 'No'. But we left them the tapes and DVDs today. Then we went on to a meeting with the EU delegation. As far as I'm concerned, they are going to write an official letter to the Russian Consulate about my situation and the fact that the Courses had to be postponed, meaning that, if I had to honour my visa exit date, I would have to leave before the end of the 'Series & Soaps' course. So they're writing to the Russians not simply for an extension of my visa, but to ask what can be done in order to facilitate my situation here in Viet Naam in order to stay on longer and to be able to go back with impunity and not be screwed up when I go through Russia. ************** I also asked Frank, our EU Delegation liaison, about the 'tunnels' near Vinh, which is close to Cua Lo and also close to Ho Chi Minh's birthplace. Because, if the participants don't come up with an idea, I shall impose a subject

(Note: I had to change my ideas about using the video footage that I shot coming over, as the Documentary participants would no longer be editing-to-finished-product. Equipment was very limited and the participants only had 4 large format DV cameras and 4 semi-portable lights, so we had to come up with a formula for hands-on film-making 13/06/05). Just in case, I want to clear the possibility of either filming in the tunnels or at least creating scenarios for a documentary or even a mini-series. During the American bombardment, the village of Vinh Moc was totally destroyed in June 1965. The survivors built an extraordinary system of tunnels that were home to 82 families, about 300 people. They had to dig deep and the tunnels were about 7metres down. There were wells, toilets, supply dumps for armaments, conference rooms and a hospital... as well as living space for the 80-odd families. There were 17 babies born in the hospital during the continuing bombardment and my proposal (unless the participants come up with something better) is that they create scenarios -either individually or in groups- to investigate what happened to those babies born nearly 40 years ago. Hopefully we will be able to brainstorm a series of different approaches. If we DO go with the Tunnels idea, I'll try to give as much input to help them turn out a product that the Americans would want to buy and show to the insular US general public. In other words, screw the aspects of propaganda (the whole situation was pretty horrific anyway); let's take the human approach, let's take it from the historical angle, let's make a sociological approach. But there's also a fresh problem. I found out today from the Training Center that instead of the 15 to 18 participants who were supposed to be on my Documentary course, there are 31 definitely signed up and another dozen waiting as possible replacements who, if all else fails, might very well turn up as 'observers'. They told me that there will be 4 cameras, which means creating large crews AND finding something for them all to do! 4 cameras means 4 groups, unless I can convince half of them to film at night and have 8 teams, but I don't hold out much hope: the Training Center people spent more time explaining what they could not do rather than seeing what could be done. They really seem to believe that the only answer to better film-making is a question of money and equipment: that's not AT ALL why I accepted the mission. Other people will be working on more technical courses, but I intend to concentrate on content, ideas and problem-solving WITHIN the logistical limitations. So my participants will have to prepare edit lists from whatever they shoot, then, all being well, the following course in Cua Lo, run by Alastair Owen, will pick up the scenarios, video rushes and rough edits, and then put the films together a)according to the instructions of the original director and/or writer, and b)using the rushes, edit the material afresh, demonstrating how we might approach it in Europe. I've already watched 3 VN documentaries on television in my room 408 and I have a list of suggestions to help them vary their approach. ************** I hope to see as much local TV as possible, because the idea of a Vietnamese Soap is not at all obvious. The country is so long and thin, the climate so different from one place to another... and it will take quite some time to 'feel'

any differences between those from the South and those from around here. Preparations for the 30th anniversary of the 'liberation' of the South are well under way... and I understand that there will be at least half of the participants from in and around Ho Chi Minh City, so I think I'll play it by ear and gut reaction: it might be essential to have TWO soap operas.... ************** A quick thought about the sometimes negative tone that I hear in the previous recording... I've just listened to what I said... I think the negativity has rubbed off from Costa's meetings with the Training Center over the past month. There are lots of enthusiastic people around; they just don't seem to be decisionmakers who have been assigned to our mission. Although I handed over the material for my 2 courses, Costa has not been able to extract even one tape of any VTV production, and they seem to be treating him (and therefore, us) as more of a threat than a welcome collaboration. However, things are moving... 4 of our team have met, the EU Delegation seems to be very supportive... ...and we have just had a terrific meal at 'The Little Hanoi' restaurant, just round the corner from my hotel. All in all a happy Monday 21st. But... No luck with the web. One of the computers was on the blink and there were 3 antipodeans, all rather the worse for wear, waiting impatiently for a Japanese lady to react to their muttered insults and toddle off to bed. That's why I went up to my room to talk to myself... ************** Last day of the TET - a day off in Hoi Lim. The 4 of us, together with 2 Vietnamese guides, went to Hoi Lim today, for the last day of their festival for the New Year. I did a certain amount of filming finally with the video camera, but also with the cheapo digital. A lot like village fairs and ftes in rural Italy... Interesting... incredibly noisy... ... it was a false alarm as far as getting warm is concerned. It was really very, very cold. I put my fur boots back on again today, it was really so cold. However, we had lunch (where I paid for everybody) and it was about 23 Swiss Francs... about 10, for the 6 of us. We had what amounted to a fish fondue which was exquisite... I haven't had my taste-buds titillated like that for years! Really a wonderful meal. The bill was 182,000 dong, so I gave 200,000 to the lady... and she tried to give me 20,000 back. In other words, she gave us a reduction of 2,000 dong because we'd spent so much. She got quite charmingly upset when I insisted she kept -not just the 2, but- the 20,000... more or less 1. When you think about the prices you pay in Switzerland or almost anywhere else, it becomes quite obscene... these people don't expect to make 500% profit and you find that, even with the tiniest little food-seller squatting on the curbside, they take so much time and so much real pride in their preparation, that they would never be able to charge a 'real' hourly rate even if they were working for Vietnamese wages in Rochat's kitchen close to my home, in Crissier. What I mean is that I'm sure they would take as much care wherever they were, so the price of a meal in person-hours would bring all the western kitchen staff out on strike.

We were sitting cross-legged on the floor, which at my age is not an easy thing to do anymore, I'm afraid... and the food just kept coming and coming and coming. The bouillon was made with a huge fish that stayed in the pot, we didn't eat any of it, it was only for the bouillon. And then the other fillets of fish -some of it freshwater, some of it from the sea- were cooked with lemon grass, morning glory, carrots, tomatoes and those slightly sour tasting star-shaped vegetablescum-fruit... and we had rice of course... and we finished up with bowls of the soup. I can't explain, it was... really an exceptional meal. Coming home in the 4x4, we were all rather cold, all rather tired, but as Gerard Hoffnung probably said, we were all wonderfully fed up... I've finally got the air conditioner in my room to blow warm rather than cold, so at least I won't be freezing in bed tonight. Tomorrow morning I have to go to the Delegation with my passport and, hopefully, they're going to finalise the letter to give to the Russians in order to get my visa extended, or, if the worst comes to the worst, to facilitate getting a new visa for my return trip. I'm going to watch a bit of football tonight! ************** 24th Feb. Another lovely meal last night... Today, Costa, Natalie and I went for the opening ceremony with Mr Van for the courses at the Training Center (Marcus drove off after lunch yesterday with Quang who will be translating for him when he opens his own course in Cua Lo (where I shall be going next week), 300Kms down the coast). I then had a three hour meeting with Trung, my French translator, going through the programme and establishing everything for the daily planning of next week... and the week after: one week viewing, discussing and doing exercises; one week of scenario work & shooting. ************** 25th Feb .... I've more or less got over the seedlings of a depression after my unhappy little trip to the Russian Consulate today which resulted in absolutely nothing and... well.... No extension possible: I have to have another invitation from Moscow... from a different company, it can't be the same as last time... has to be for a one-way trip... it'll cost me $150... then I have to pay 48 (i.e. the dollar equivalent of 48, according to the exchange rate on that particular day), for the visa itself, here in H Ni... ...so ...sod'em all ! I've decided that I'm going to work up until lunchtime on 1st April, catch the train to Beijing at about 6.30p.m. the same evening, get into Moscow late lunchtime on 11th April (which is the very last day of my visa) and leave again that evening, or later in the afternoon... or whenever it's possible to get out of the country on the same day. I'm going to have a look now on the net... That means I have to get my visas for Mongolia and Belarus and **** the Russians, I'm afraid.

************** 25th Feb, around midnight... Not a good day! But I've calmed down a little, satisfied a grumbling stomach at 'Little Hanoi' with a beef broth, cold spring rolls that I rolled myself, filled with salad, cucumber, pineapple heart, tomato and mildly hot peppers (all cut into fine strips) arranged around deep-fried, piping hot fresh tuna 'cigars' in batter, all rolled in rice paper and dipped in a sauce of 'the five senses'... and delicately washed down with a bottle of Dalat Red... so I can finally manage to raise a smile as I go back over the rest of this Clouseau-like day. It all started off so promisingly... Another long, unpaid but productive morning at the Training Center, then I collected my official letter -a "note verbale"- to take to the Russians. I thought it would be an opportunity to take a 'ciclo' (pedicab: rickshaw, used by my generation, seemingly does mean one man riding on the back of another, so the word has been outlawed). Easier said than done though, because the Diplomatic District proved to be too far away, too long a haul, for either of the ciclo peddlers that I asked.... and here I get spirited off to my childhood in Coventry... ..."No Pedlars or Hawkers". A sign half way up a wall on the end terraced house in Terry Road, beside the Charterhouse Pub. My grandparents lived at No. 87. My mother and I moved in with them after we came back from South Africa at the end of 1948. As soon as I thought about that sign, I saw myself pulling a friend from across the road up the entry beside the pub on our home-made trolley: you know the sort of thing... a kind of cross of Lorraine with 4 tiny wheels, rickety in itself, but running smoothly on those 3-inch wheels full of glittering ball-bearings. I was obviously a horse, with the thick, coarse string under my arms and up round my neck. And I was looking at the sign and consciously read it for the first time. My playmate, Peter Clifford, was one of those Coventry Kids killed at the Farnborough Air Show when the DH110 fell our of the sky... The reasons the notice came to mind were audio, visual and kinaesthetic. Haggling with the ciclo rider, I heard an unmistakable noise just behind me. Like Billy Connolly sitting on top of a Glasgow bus wearing his winter duffel coat, I heard someone preparing to vomit down my neck. I tried to shrivel up and cringe away to my left and went down on one knee, much to the surprise of my non-accepting ciclo-driver. But of course, no-one was going to vomit; she was simply clearing her throat. Rather forcefully. So here in H Ni there are Pedallers AND Hawkers... goodness, Roger, lateral thinking is NOT the same as going off at a tangent. Back to the Russians! Frank at the Delegation had written the Russian Consulate address and phone number on a sheet of paper, so, having been turned down by the Ciclo Pedallers, I jumped into a taxi. After a 25 minute trip, we pulled up outside the address: it was a pavementside panel-beaters' workshop! As were the 'shops' on either side for a good 50 metres. And the rather more attractive 2-storey buildings behind the shopfronts looked nothing like an embassy. My taxi driver looked again at the address that Frank had written and assured

me that we were in the right place. So I phoned the embassy. Three times! Each time they put me on hold and, after 5 or 6 minutes of hanging on, I redialed, with the same result. My taxi driver spoke no English or French and you can only get so far with mime. I tried to find out if he spoke Russian. No. "Yuri Gagarin". No. "Putin No. "Gary Kasparov, tovarich". Ah! Frantic nodding. Long story short: the taxi driver visited 5 or 6 cafes and finally found a chessplayer who spoke French, so we were able to communicate - the address was indeed correct, but the houses are numbered continuously... until you get to 1000, then they start again from 1 ! So, another 20 minutes and 500 house-fronts away, and we were finally in front of a building reminiscent of the Gropius-designed 'Lawn Road Flats' behind Belsize Park Tube Station, in London. But, whereas the Lawn Road 'Isobar' looked like a WWII German pocket battleship, the Russian complex in H Ni looks as if it is going to surge into space rather than out to sea. Outside the Consulate entrance was a subdued crowd that had obviously been waiting for hours; I felt rather guilty as they moved me to the front of the queue and quickly inside. But there, after handing my 'note verbale' to the receptionist, I had to wait quite a long time before the very smart, pleasant, but immovable attach confirmed that there was no way to prolong my visa, wished me a happy stay in Ha Noi, and handed me back the 'note verbale'. I sulked out of the building, contemplated visiting the zoo-cum-funfair on the opposite side of the nearby square, drank 2 large beers, then decided to walk back into town - 5 miles, at least. I met Natalie when I got back to the hotel and filled her in on the saga. It was the "not again !" look on her face that convinced me that I'd talked quite enough (too much) about the problem and that NOW was a good time to make a decision and, hopefully, put it all behind me... or at least on hold, until the 11th April loomed large. Listening to my first recording this morning, I sound like a peevish 8yr-old; even the swearwords sound like the result of a not very convincing 'dare'.