My Conversion to Islam My Conversion to Islam It is fair to say that most people do not have the best impression of American

converts to Islam. When the subject comes to mind, maybe they think of John Walker Lynn who joined the terrorist group Al Qaeda, or the people who convert to Islam while serving out their prison sentence. Whatever their impression may be, it is most likely not a very positive one. I am going to tell you my story of how I came to embrace the most misunderstood religion in the world, Islam. I was born in [deleted] on [deleted]. My mother was raised Presbyterian, but now is not necessarily practicing, and my father used to be Catholic, but later in his life adopted the ideas of Deism, essentially. I myself was raised in the Lutheran church. My parents took me to church just about every Sunday morning until I was around seven years old or so. I later began going to another Lutheran church with a friend from across the street at age 10, and I continued to go to that church until the age of 13. I had always strongly believed there was a Supreme Being, but it was not until middle school that I actually began to have a personal relationship with God. Whenever I was going through hard times and was in tears, I somehow felt as if God was helping me get through it, and I was definitely grateful to Him. After middle school ended, I stopped going to church almost altogether. I was displeased with many of the people at the church I was going to, and the fact many people would go to church and gossip about other members. I did not feel a part of the Christian community at all. I also began to doubt various Christian teachings, whether I realized it fully, or not. I had a huge issue with believing in the Trinity, or specifically the belief that Jesus is actually God or one with God.

During this time I also came to know that the Bible had been changed over the years, books taken out and added. This fact made me no longer trust the Bible as the word of God. I started looking into many different religions from all over the world. I was especially interested in the Buddhist religion because it just seemed so peaceful and full of great wisdom, but I did not like the fact that it is not a theistic religion. I also looked into the Eastern Orthodox Church as well as Orthodox Judaism. I felt strongly discouraged into looking more into Orthodox Judaism though, because well, Jews are an ethno-religious group, and I would never fit the ethnic part of it. Being Jewish is as much cultural as it is religious. Without fitting in with the ancient culture, how could I expect to be fully accepted into the religion? I looked into Islam a bit, but definitely not seriously at all. In the 9th grade, I began going to a small, non-traditional private school. It was at that school that I met my best friend and now husband, Hilly. With long hours of thoughtful discussions afterschool, we found that we had so much in common with each other. It almost seemed as if we viewed the world around us with the same pair of eyes. Our morals were astonishingly similar. We both were disillusioned with society and also what we viewed as lack of moral restraint in the world. Only later did I find out that Hilly was intensely interested in the religion of Islam and seriously considering the option of converting to the religion. One day he had made a comment that made me think a bit. He told me I had a very Islamic view of the world. I was intrigued by this since I had definitely never associated with anything Islamic. To be honest, I found myself a bit scared of the religion. Islam was something I associated with violence and the oppression of women.

When I thought of the religion, I thought of the World Trade Center tumbling down on September 11th, and the burqa-clad women living under Taliban rule I saw on the television. Not too long afterwards, Hilly lent me one of his copies of the English translation of the meaning of the Holy Quran and a short book of sayings of the Prophet Muhammad (also known as ahadith in Arabic). When I read these I was simply amazed. I found myself agreeing with much of what was said in the Quran and what the Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) taught. He taught to worship one genderless, formless God, with no partners or incarnations, always be kind to others no matter what, give to the poor and needy, and perform all of the five daily prayers at their prescribed times. I also appreciated the fact that Jesus (peace be upon him) is still venerated in Islam, just not worshiped like in Christianity. Islam encompassed everything I wanted and needed in a religion: complete monotheism as well as structure. I started to see a side of Islam that I never even knew existed. Of course, I still had numerous of questions about Islam. What baffled me was how a person who calls themselves Muslim could do such horrible things. Were any of these practices actually sanctioned in Islam or were they trying to use religion to justify their heinous actions when the justification simply was not there? Hilly and I would have long talks about many controversial things Islam was commonly associated with in the media. We discussed things like forced marriage and FGM (Female Genital Mutilation.) After chatting with Hilly for so long and having all of my questions answered, I realized these were cultural practices, and not a part of the religion of Islam. I realized that you have to separate the actions of followers of a religion, and the actual principles of the religion.

Only shortly after this, I decided to finally become Muslim. I texted my only Muslim friend Sal and told him about this. To my surprise, his mother was the one who ended up replying instead. She was so excited about my decision. Sals mother was actually raised Catholic, but later in life converted to Islam. She had gone through the same spiritual journey I had, which made me feel a bit more comfortable. On February 1st, 2009, Sals mother took me to the local masjid (mosque) to say the Shahadah (declaration of faith) in front of everyone. I was so nervous at first that I was shaking! I had never been inside a mosque before and honestly was not sure what to expect. Finally, I declared my faith in front of everyone. Afterwards, tons of little girls in hijab (Islamic head scarf) came up to me and congratulated me with a big hug. They were from all over the world, places like Bosnia, Afghanistan, Iraq, and Sudan. By the end of it, all my nervousness subsided. Maybe two weeks or so after I became Muslim, I decided to wear the hijab as a symbol of my faith in Islam. My mother hated this so much. She said I looked like foreigner in it, not anyone related to her, and that she wanted everyone to see my beautiful strawberry blonde hair and be seen as the Scots-Irish girl I am, not an Arab, or whatever people assumed. My father also strongly disapproved of it and resented to fact that to him I did not look Amerkan enough. Of course, I could not completely understand that since America is a melting pot of different cultures and everyone looks different. There really is no American look. Some of the lifestyle changes were relatively hard for me to get completely used to. It took me about two months or so to finally learn the prayer in Arabic. Not only that, I had to get used to praying at the prescribed times. Many little things in Islam though were not difficult for me at all for me though, like not eating pork. Staying away from all intoxicants also was not any problem

either, since it was something I never did anyways because of my own personal beliefs. Wearing hijab was a relatively easy thing for me to do. I had always been quite conservative dress wise, so I felt comfortable in my loose clothes. I simply liked the privacy of it. I did not think anyone had the right to see my body anyways if I did not want them to. I also liked the fact that guys tended to stay away from me (lol). I definitely was not looking for a romantic relationship either. What I hated a lot about wearing the hijab though was that random people would often stare shamelessly at me, sometimes they were simply curious stares, and others were not so nice. After a while though, I finally got used to it and hardly took notice. Why should I anyways? They obviously have no sort of manners and I could care less what they thought about me. Other experiences with hijab were very positive. Some people in my class would go up to me and ask me various questions about Islam, which I did not mind at all. I wanted them to know what Islam is really like, not what the media tells them it is. I wanted them to know that you have to separate the actions of a follower of a certain religion and the actual principles of the religion. I wanted them to just understand that many so-called Islamic practices are actually just cultural ones. After answering so many questions, I could often tell the person felt a bit better about the religion. I would receive the ohhh, okay response frequently. Another thing about being conspicuously Muslim was that I would automatically make a few new friends. Many Muslims, and especially other hijabis (women who wear hijab), are often happy to see another Muslim. There is a bond that is automatically there because of it. Walking down the street, shopping, etc, and just going about my daily life I would often hear the Muslim greeting Assalamu alaikum to turn around and see another Muslimah smiling widely at me.