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Snow-White Man

-script-

Teacher: Bolcas Claudia Writers: Rus Bianca Cuc Andreea-Teodora

Denis Derecichei Class X-A


Snow-White Man (writing a text message): We were supposed to meet three days ago. U didnt show up. Im starting to worry. (tearing the petals off a flower): She loves me; she loves me not. She loves me; she loves me not. Princess (text message): Sorry dude, couldnt make it. XOXO Rival(text message/facebook chat): Hi there, whats up? Princess(text message/facebook chat): Sorry, Im a little busy right now. Chat u later. All the dwarfs come walking towards SWM on Pink Panther theme song. They all start talking in the same time. Dwarf #1: My God, you have a foe! Dwarf #2: OMG, Armani just canceled their new spring collection. Dwarf #3: I have a test paper tomorrow. (Dwarf #4 says nothing, plain, straight face) Dwarf #5: LOL theres a guy hitting on your girl! (Dwarf #6 laughs) Dwarf #7 (after everyone stops talking, with a contemplative gaze): My hair looks pretty good today! 3 paparazzi follow Dwarf #7 around SWM: Girls, girls! Slow down! No.4, tell me what just happened. Dwarf #4: Not in the most frightening dream you could have forseen this dark hour coming, for oh, fierce wolves are Dwarf #2 (stops her):Another guy is after your girl. SWM reacts weird, then goes to The Mirror. SWM: Mirror, mirror on the wall, whos the cutest of them all? The Mirror: Its about time you looked at yourself; look at that nasty beard of yous, you could most certainly use a shave. And to answer your question: Yes, for the moment you are the cutest of

them all, but theres one that, with you out of the way, could become the one. Rivals Father (on the phone): Fight him, son. With my help, you will find your way to your beloved princess heart. Heres what youll need: one leg of stinky frog, a red Deep Marshes worm, one moles eye, a rats tail.uhm the rest Ill get from Ebay and ship it to you by UPS Ground Service along with the instructions. Uhm... by the way, dont forget to buy your mommys monthly ration of poisoned ivy next time you come over. Rival (on the phone): Sure thing! Love you daddy. Bye! Narrator: Time is passing by, the potion is ready and so is The Rival; he knows where SWM will be today, and so, he acts quickly: he pours the potion in the Burger gravy that McDonalds sells. The Waitress: One dead meat dragged through the garden! Oh, sorry sir, what can I get you? SWM: 10 Big Mac menus with everything and a cherry on top, pretty please. (BIG smile) Narrator: But The Rival lacked patience and attacked SWM as soon as he got out of the fast-food. Music starts song: I feel pretty Narrator: Ooops, sorry! Yo, Dj, thats my playlist! Music starts again Mission Impossible theme song. The two fight, one of them hits a tree. Music stops. Tree: Dude, dont hit me, I have a soul. And by the way, just so you know, if it werent for me, youd all be dead right now! Music continues, and so does the fight. They both fall dead on the ground. The princess shows up and walks hasty and worried towards SWM. The Princess: Oh ,no! Youre dead. Maybe my sweet lips on your cheek shall give you life once more. (She kisses him on the cheek ) Hmm, that didnt work. She slaps him while saying Wake up dude, wake up! ...(after not succeeding in waking him up) OK, now Im hungry She eats and dies. SWM and The Rival wake up.

The Rival: Yo man, your blacksmith is worthless, I dont know how much you pay him but SWM (interrupts him): What? You talk about my sword, my blacksmith, you come into my hood and insult my family. What about your dad? Hes not even capable of preparing one efficient death potion. All he managed to do was to make us fall asleep. The Rival leans over to the princess and tries to wake her up. The Rival: Dude, I think she s dead eating that burger killed her, it must have been one too many. SWM: Wow, I can almost hear my mommys voice saying what she always used to say SWM Moms Voice: Sweety, how many times did I tell you? Eating junk food is bad for your health. The Rival: That is so cool! I just had the feeling I heard your moms voice. You know when I was a young girluhm boy and my mom used to shower meooops! Anyway, she used to tell me another thing The Rivals Moms voice: Sweety, how many times did I tell you? Do not mess with someone elses girlfriend Narrator: No tree has been injured during the making of this play. The stunts youve just witnessed have been performed by experts. Do not try this at home!

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