Business Communication

Peer Evaluation: NEGATIVE Message

Writer: Reader:

Case #8First, read the message. Then, respond to the following queries in a straightforward and honest manner, with an attitude of helping your colleague, quoting directly from the text of the message. Use the back of this sheet if necessary.

1. Identify the order/organizational pattern (D.P. or I.D.P). Provide evidence. Is this organizational pattern appropriate for this message? 2. On the writers copy, circle every negative word in the message. Here, provide alternative positive wording.

3. Does the opening provide a buffer to the bad news? Is it brief, relevant to the topic, neutral (neither yes nor no), supportive, and interesting, and does it provide a smooth transition into the explanation? Use specific evidence from the message.

4. Is the explanation clear, logical, and convincing, and in positive or neutral language? If it is vague or weak, or negative, indicate where, and provide a solution.

5. Is the actual refusal clear, but stated in positive language? If it is unclear or negative, indicate why, and provide a solution.

6. Is the closing appropriate and friendly, maintaining or (re)building goodwill? If not, what is its weakness (i.e., does it restate the bad news?)? Provide a solution.

7. Based on your answers above, explain where and how the message FAILS to accomplish the purpose of giving BAD NEWS while retaining the reader's goodwill. In your explanation, consider the appropriateness of the organizational plan (mention things like the buffer, the friendly closing, etc.); consider the language and tone (i.e., negative words, you attitude); and even though it is a draft, consider the basic format (addresses, salutation, complimentary close, spacing). Be specific and thorough.

8. Overall, if you were the intended reader of this message, suggest to the writer improvements (in content and format) that would ease your acceptance of the BAD NEWS. Use information from the textbook in chapter 8 to substantiate your suggestions.

rjg, rev. 1/26/12