WEEKLYDIG.

COM GIVING IS THE NEW RECEIVING FREE 12.10.08 - 12.17.08

HIKE THE PIKE MEATS FROM ME TO YOU DRUM + BASICS FONT LOVE ART BENEFITS NASAL

TOTALLY LAST
MINUTE, DOW
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MAY NOT GET E,
IT SHIPPED IN
BUT IT’S THE TH TIME,
OUGHT THAT

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COUNTS

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tak toyoshima
Dear Pink-Fleece-Jacket-Clad Yuppie
Bunghole I encountered Nov. 19th at
Centre and Green streets in JP:
When you deliberately parked your lit-
tle black car directly across the crosswalk,
totally blocking it and its wheelchair ramp,
and I calmly said, “It’s illegal to park in a
crosswalk,” and you irrelevantly said, “I’m
picking up my dry cleaning,” and I calmly
replied, “It’s rude, dangerous and illegal to
park in a crosswalk,” and you irrelevantly
said, “Thank you,” while continuing toward
the dry cleaning place, and I calmly replied,
“Fuck you,” I did not mean it literally. I
am clarifying this because you obviously
live such an entitled life you are probably
unused to being challenged and might not
understand such terms. Here is what I mean
by a metaphorical “fuck you.” While you
were in the shop, I took a cellphone photo
of your illegally parked car with its New
Jersey license plate. Now, it’s possible that
someone who drives so badly actually is
from New Jersey and feeling right at home
here. But I doubt someone would come all
the way from Jersey just to do dry cleaning.
No, it’s much more likely you bought a
condo up here but kept your out-of-state
registration to get cheaper insurance—in-
surance you probably need a lot, being a
reckless yuppie bunghole. Now, I could be
wrong. But I’ll let the cops, the RMV and
state insurance officials who love to crack
down on scofflaws sort out my little photo.
I get that my life is far less important to
you than getting stains out of your jogging
shorts. But your privilege to drive is far less
important to me than either of them.
Sincerely,
White As You, But One Million Times
Less Yuppie
Send your anonymous gripes and grouses
to letters@weeklydig.com, or to
Dig Department of Gripes, 242 E. Berkeley St.,
2nd Flr., Boston, MA 02118. Crybaby.
3
table of contents
this WEEK
NEWS
Senators who are leaving you /
VOL 10 + ISSUE 49 How many CVS stores are in
your neighborhood? / Media Farm 3
Letters
gets with the giving
DEAR READER,
3
DEPARTMENT OF COMMERCE
us
You’re being stretched between a tough economy and guilt about your consumerist culture on 5
The Dig’s guide to gifts that are
News + features
one hand, and a desire to help jump-start the economy and give the obligatory token of love in-stock and awaiting your
on the other. Those conflicting instincts are hitting some of your fellow human beings pretty purchase / Milton Station / Purses
hard, since three people have died in shopping-related accidents this year. to make friends green with envy
So, in the interest of survival, here’s the holiday gift guide for everyone on your list, from
your uncle to your coworker to your lover. And if that’s not enough for ya, check out the EATS + DRINKS 11
commerce
expanded Dig That section, which reviews all the DVDs you can rip from the shelves and cling Second Glass’ guide to gifting wine /
to your bosom. The Department of Commerce cooks up the gift of easy recipes from your Give the give of meat /
favorite local chefs. And we grinches in the News section stuff your stocking with lumps of LUPEC: brunch bloodfest / 11
coal: toll hikes and pink slips. BeerAdvocate: Trinity IPA
gift guide
And here’s a helpful holiday tip: Don’t buy wasteful wrapping paper! Just cut up your
old clothes (wash them first) then wrap your presents with them! It’s like giving two gifts! MUSIC
Wait … no. Scratch that. Donate your old jeans to Goodwill, and wrap your presents with your Bob Diesel’s disco in the list / 24
Eats + drinks
favorite stylin’ weekly. Because this rag will look great wrapped around whiskey rocks or a new Drum & Bass DJ Adam F in the mix /
vibrator (guess which one’s for your uncle?!). The Wandas get plugged / Big Bear
freaks you out
CARA BAYLES | CARA@WEEKLYDIG.COM
30
FILM
dig this
We Doubt it’ll do much for Streep /
LETTERS Helvetica—a design revolution / 33
A + E
Cadillac Records gets some love
Send your thoughts to letters@weeklydig.com “most emailed” article lists reflect the most- 33
Music
or 242 East Berkeley St., 2nd Flr., Boston, MA read articles (Media Farm, 12.3.08). Why would ARTS
02118. All letters may be edited for length, someone email an article on the Mumbai at- 826 Boston auction is a 43
movies
clarity and accuracy. Please include all contact tacks that anyone could read about anywhere? must-attend event / Stella member
Surely people email a story to someone else chats us up / Expanded holiday
information. 45
Dig That!
arts
only after reading many other stories.
We don’t want to get in It is similarly disingenuous to bash articles 45
WORDS
the middle of it … oh based on their subject matter rather than EXIT POLLS
Tibetan scarves and Zubaz
wait, we already are. their merit in presenting it. What is inherently
46
comedy
Dear Weekly Dig, “asinine” about people being interested in: the
most significant cultural technology of our time; ONLINE
In last week’s quality-of-life index (Bean Coun-
workplace-related health; the re-evaluation of Recipes to satiate the carnivore 48
ter, 12.3.08), you mentioned that the Gypsy Bar
Comics
standardized testing in academe; the amazing on your list
and my peers at Emerson College were having
a dispute over smoking turf. As an Emersonian abilities of animals; and the quest for cheap fun
48
Classifieds
who values her lung capacity, I am not one of in a historically bad economy? The only thing
these kids being sent to $40,000 higher educa- inherently asinine is your derogatory descrip-
tion, only to stand outside in the cold and kill tions of these subjects.
myself slowly. Congratulations on being the fluff you 52
ADULT
However, I, too, have a beef with the Gypsy pretend to de-fluff.
Bar folks. When their patrons leave, they pro- JR 54
exit polls
ceed out to the street and often begin yelling VIA EMAIL
at each other. This would be fine if it weren’t in
PS Awesome in-depth investigative report
the middle of the night on weekdays. Between
on fake dangerous toys a couple pages later 
them, the suitemates and the random 1am
(Kiddie Kroakers, 12.3.08). Hard-hitting, serious
construction, every evening I end up stuffing
journalism at its best.
my ears and burying my very well-educated
head in my pillows, in an attempt to get some
rest before the next day of classes.
… and right.
I feel like that (Media Farm, 12.3.08) is what I COVER ARTIST | Anke Weckmann
In the spirit of the holidays, please, people: lives in London and has been working
am thinking 90 percent of the time when I look
Between 2 and 6am, cordially SHUT UP. as a freelance illustrator since she
right at the “most read”/”most emailed” stories graduated in 2005. She spends all of
Laura
on the Times website. her time drawing and drinking tea and
Boston couldn’t imagine anything better. Her
Thanks!
drawings have appeared in magazines,
Media Farm gets dark Claire books, on greeting cards and T-shirts.
Via email You can see more of her work at
and angry, is accused of linotte.net
being fluffy ... If you’re a local artist interested in
Dear Farmers, submitting work for our cover or for
the Dig This spread, send samples to
You managed to base an entire anti-fluff article Tak Toyoshima, at tak@weeklydig.com.
on the false and unsupported assumption that
12
10
08
–
12
17
08
WEEKLYDIG.C0M


 news to us

table of contents
“
“I think they made a

Letters
lot of the difference
this year. I think
they’re essential.”

us
---

News + features
Sen. John Kerry talking
about students voting for Bye Bye, beacon hill
Barack Obama, without a hint Four senators step down without scandal
of where-were-you-in-2004
bitterness. Really. 12.2.08 bY isis madrid

commerce
“I think it was a mistake Bribe-taking and sexual assault charges aside, the Massachu- couldn’t make it to the goodbye and a letter was read on his
for him to get rid of setts State Senate has seen some changes this election year, behalf. “I leave office with great pride and comfort in the knowl-

gift guide
it. I thought that whole and four state senators have opted not to run for reelection on edge that Massachusetts leads the world in fostering a more
Western, rugged look was their own accord. Senators Robert Antonioni, Edward Augustus, inclusive, tolerant and just society,” he wrote, alluding to the
really working for him. Robert Creedon Jr. and Pam Resor are leaving the State House. Legislature’s defeat of a proposed constitutional amendment to

Eats + drinks
Last Thursday in the Senate chamber, the senators and repeal gay marriage this past May. “On that day, Massachusetts
For some reason, maybe
their colleagues reminisced on sessions past. Senate President reaffirmed its historic role as the conscience of our nation.” Au-
because it was scratchy
Therese Murray welcomed the congregation with three bangs gustus’ seat has been filled by the election of Millbury Democrat
when he kissed his wife,
of her gavel. “Today, we salute four senators,” she said before the Michael Moore.
he was forced to get rid ceremonial goodbyes began. Sen. Pamela Resor, D-Acton, chairwoman of the Environ-

dig this
of it, but we’re deeply Sen. Edward Augustus Jr., D-Worcester, decided to move on ment, Natural Resources and Agriculture Committee, served in
disappointed with the after two terms in office. Augustus, who at age 24 began his the House from 1991 until she switched to the Senate in 1999.
loss of the beard.” political career as the youngest person to head the Worces- During the farewell, she was lauded for her environmental fer-

A + E
--- ter School Committee, made public education a focus of his vor, which helped this past session to be a watershed for green

Music
President-elect Obama on his senatorial career. Murray applauded his efforts to increase matters. Resor, the first woman ever elected to the Senate from
secretary of commerce nominee, school funding and reduce the number of high school dropouts. her district, was described as knowing that you don’t have to be
Augustus, who currently chairs the Election Laws Committee, the loudest person in the room to be the most persuasive.

movies
Gov. Bill Richardson, who shaved.
“
12.3.08 more >> 6

arts
WORDS
Toll hike on the Pike

comedy
Last week, approximately 100 concerned the two. We don’t want store or restaurant. “This is
patrick maloney, George Weinstein. got some random photos? submit them to design@weeklydig.com

Bostonians attended a meeting hosted our businesses closing an attack on my neighbor-

Comics
by City Councilors Salvatore LaMattina down. Then we’d have hood,” LaMattina said.
and Bill Linehan about the Massachusetts empty storefronts, and But, as the Turnpike

Turnpike Authority’s planned toll increases.
City Councilors Stephen Murphy, Michael
Ross and Sam Yoon, as well as Mayor
Menino, also attended. Menino expressed
Classifieds
that affects our real is a state organization,
estate value,” she told there’s little the Boston
the Dig. “You cannot City Council can do about
balance the books of the it. “They can voice their

ADULT
his disappointment with the Turnpike Mass. Turnpike Author- disapproval, but as far as
Authority. “The people and businesses of ity on the backs of the I know, they don’t have

Boston were not considered or consulted
before planning to radically increase tolls
in and around our city,” he said.
The tolls would be jacked up from
$3.50 to $7 for the Ted Williams and
Sumner tunnels. Residents of Eastie and
the North End would not be directly
affected by the hike, since they benefit
from a resident discount (which predates
the Big Dig) that allows them to go
through the tunnels for 40 cents.
But Joanne Anzalone, president of the
North End Chamber of Commerce and
owner of Anzalone Realty, testified that
the quality of life for residents depends
on local businesses. “It concerns the entire
North End, both from a residential and
commercial standpoint. You can’t separate
residents of the North
End, South Boston and
East Boston.”
Others who voiced concerns included
members of the Taxi Drivers Association.
After deducting the toll charges from
fares, one driver claimed he’d “have to
work for nothing because of the misman-
aged Mass. Turnpike Authority.” Yet an-
other issue raised was that of nonprofits
whose volunteers may not be able to
contribute as much if the toll increases go
into effect.
LaMattina said he’d received com-
plaints from business owners who were
concerned their businesses would suffer,
as customers would be less inclined to
pay a $7 toll to patronize their favorite
exit polls
any powers over the
Turnpike Authority,” says
Mac Daniel, spokesman for
the Turnpike Authority, the body that will 
vote on the toll hike. “That’s not to say
that their voice isn’t important.”
The board approved the hike in a pre-
liminary vote last month, but they are re-
quired by law to hold two public hearings
before they make a decision (last week’s
rally was not an official Turnpike hearing).
The Pike is holding four in the next month,
with one in Boston this Wednesday. “A
lot of people think these hearings are all
wish-wash,” says Daniel, “but they do
have—and have had—an influence on
past toll increases.” [Lolly Spindler]
 from >> 5

Sen. Harriette Chandler, D-Worcester, reminded the crowd that Resor’s career began à
la Erin Brockovich, when in 1981, she served on the Acton Board of Health and soon after
as a selectman fighting contamination of the town’s water supply by W.R. Grace Co. In her
closing remarks, Resor begged her colleagues to “please, please do everything needed to
protect resources throughout Massachusetts and make it a truly green commonwealth.”
Resor’s successor is Jamie Eldridge, an Acton-born Democrat who managed Resor’s reelec-
tion campaign in 1998 and who is currently serving as a state representative.
Sen. Robert Antonioni, D-Leominster, served two terms in the House before joining
the Senate in 1992. He co-chairs the Education Committee, and Murray cheered his
efforts in education, specifically his aid in procuring $7 million for public schools and
support for special education programs statewide.
Stephen M. Brewer, D-Barre, cited Antonioni’s role as chairman during a 10-hour
hearing that defeated the death penalty. Antonioni explained his decision to move on
was inspired by his sister’s suggestion that he “get a life.” Antonioni will be replaced by
Jennifer Flanagan, D-Leominster, who’s currently a state rep.
Sen. Robert Creedon Jr., D-Brockton, a state representative from 1969 until 1972,
joined the Senate in 1997 when his brother, Michael Creedon, gave up his seat to ac-
cept a judicial appointment. He’s a longtime chair of the Judiciary Committee, and is
leaving to work as clerk of courts in Plymouth County.
Sen. Richard Moore, D-Uxbridge, had the chamber yakking it up as he joked about
Creedon’s long-winded tangents, his “old school” political cred and his media wariness.
“What you need is openness and, frankly, we had more of it then than we have now,”
Creedon said of the media on Beacon Hill, despite his own “non-relationship with the
press.” Creedon will be succeeded by Thomas Kennedy,, D-Brockton, who declared his
candidacy within minutes of Creedon’s retirement announcement back in April.
The senators’ stepping down opens up chairmanships of key committees like the
Judiciary (a powerful committee that must pass any bill to change state law, and
where bills often go to die). It also offers fresh blood (or blood transferred from the
House), in a state where incumbents are rarely challenged and seldom defeated. The
senators officially step down when their replacements are sworn in, on January 7th.

CVS doesn’t care about black people?

96J3@DE@?+
Your Home for disc manufacturing
A nationwide report accusing CVS
Caremark Corp. of substandard and
prejudiced practices spurred several
activists to express outrage over the
mission. The report found that fewer of
the newly established MinuteCare clin-
ics—which are advertised as an afford-
able alternative to a doctor’s office or
is finally in your backyard local implications of discrimination by emergency room—operate in low-income
the nation’s largest drugstore chain at a communities and communities of color.
Grand Opening press conference last week. Millona stressed that these are critical for
Special Offer: “We are concerned about the lack of immigrants “who are afraid to go to the
CVS stores in low-income neighborhoods hospital because they are afraid that their
%?N
 
!"M

and neighborhoods of color,” said Karen status might be reported.”
CH
(?Q?F
!;M?M

@IL
IHFS
Payne, president of the Boston NAACP. “CVS CVS spokesperson Michael DeAngelis
needs to become a responsible partner.” offered this statement: “The allegation
 The 40-page “Cure CVS” report
released by the labor coalition Change
that we concentrate stores in white neigh-
borhoods compared to our competitors
plus 300 posters FREE - to Win (CtW), results from a 14-month is simply untrue … CVS holds the number
when you place an order investigation of CVS stores throughout one or number two market share in eight
in our Boston office. the US. The study found that in Greater of the top 10 US markets with the larg-
Boston, there are nearly three times as est non-white populations.” Boston isn’t
12 many CVS stores per person in neigh- included in his list of regional markets.
10
08
–
borhoods with a 90-plus-percent white CtW organizer Kate Titus added that
12
17 Disc Makers is finally open right here in Boston! We have been servicing population than in neighborhoods that are CVS overcharges customers, improperly
08 the Boston area with high-quality CD and DVD replication and duplication more than 90 percent people of color, and disposes of medical records and carries
services for decades, but now are thrilled to truly be part of the community. fewer stores per person in neighborhoods expired products. At the press conference,
WEEKLYDIG.C0M

Stop in to say hello and let us help with all your CD and DVD needs.
with median annual household incomes
1-866-649-3001 • www.discmakers.com/weeklydig below $40,000 than in those with median
incomes above $80,000.
Eva Millona, executive director of the
 Massachusetts Immigrant and Refugee
Advocacy Coalition, explained that the
lack of available CVS stores in immigrant
neighborhoods contradicts CVS’ purported
a table displayed expired CVS products in-
cluding milk, baby formula and children’s
Maalox, which CtW had collected the
previous day from five of 10 Boston CVS
stores they’d visited.
“The proof is in the milk,” said CtW
organizer Faron McLurkin. No one dared to
take a sip. [Alexandra Dednah]
 table of contents
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South End’s Fastest Growing

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Consignment Shop

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exit polls
Designer Apparel for 

1/3 of the Original Price

482 Columbus Avenue
Boston, MA 02118
617-236-5838
www.armoireboston.com
 media farm
Yankee swap
by media farm
MIDDLE-AGED WHITE GUYS who
happen to be media moguls get
to have all the fun, don’t they?
While we literate peons have to
scourge to find credible sources of
information, they shuffle our
conglomerated dailies
around, passing them
to each other like
Christmas presents.
First, noted
Australian-conserva-
tive-mogul-with-
more-money-than-
God Rupert Murdoch
gave Boston Herald
publisher and Mur-
doch clone Pat Purcell
executive ownership of
Ottaway Newspapers Inc. (“Merry Hanuk-
kah, Pat!” he allegedly said). Ottaway
includes local dailies like the Cape Cod
Times, Nantucket’s Inquirer and Mirror,
and the Standard-Times in New Bedford.
Ottaway was a bonus starter-pack that
came with the Wall Street Journal when
News Corp. purchased it last year.
Of course, Purcell and Murdoch are
old pals, since Citizen Murdoch bought
the Herald in 1985. Then in 1988, eeeevil
Sen. Ted Kennedy pointed out that
Murdoch, who owns Fox Broadcasting
(and thereby our local Fox affiliate), was
breaking a 1975 Federal Communica-
tions Commission antimonopoly rule
(which was since “relaxed” in 2007) that
prohibits ownership of a TV station and a
paper in the same local market. The paper
continued to shit money for a couple of
years under Murdoch’s reign, until 1994,
when he sold the Herald to Purcell. And
the Herald is still shitting money today!
And now those two knuckleheads are to-
gether again, and rumor has it Murdoch
might try to save the Herald (unlike the
12
10
08 last time he had anything to do with it)!!!
–
12
17
The more papers are shuffled among a
08 select group of media moguls, the more
things stay the same.
WEEKLYDIG.C0M
Also, last week, Stephen Mindich and
son bought out Spanish-language weekly
El Planeta. Phoenix Media, Mindich’s baby
has been an investor in El Planeta for
years, and already prints and distributes it.

Bradley Mindich is claiming that
El Planeta has a circulation of 50,000,
and that’s what their media kit—which
boasts the Verified circulation auditor’s
seal—says as well … of course, it also says
“circulation may vary week to week.” But
the most recent Verified reports, from
March 2008, indicate El Planeta’s circula-
tion for New England totaled 34,431.
You have to hand it to Mindich: Niche
markets are a smart investment right
now, and there are over 400,000 Spanish
speakers in the Commonwealth … that’s
a significant “niche.” And El Planeta has
“We guess stuffing
the pants of your
circulation figures
with the tube sock of
a 10,000 or so (that
metaphor’s a gift
for you, Mindich)
is meant to impress
advertisers.”
been such a success story, with Javier
Marin and Jon Urruzuno launching the
weekly out of Brookline in 2004 and
distributing it out of the back of their
van to offer much-needed local Spanish-
language reporting … so why inflate the
numbers for something that’s already
impressive and important? We guess
stuffing the pants of your circulation
figures with the tube sock of a 10,000 or
so (that metaphor’s a gift for you, Mind-
ich) is meant to impress advertisers, but
would you be seduced by a circulation
that “varies”?
AND SPEAKING OF wobbling numbers, did
anyone else check out last week’s Phoenix
insert tribute to 101.7 FM, aka, WFNX? The
Phoenix reserved a full-page ad in itself,
congratulating FNX (which is part of the
Phoenix Media empire) on it’s 25th birth-
day. Isn’t that kind of like writing yourself
a love letter?
SO, YOU MIGHT be wondering, with all
these wealthy dudes spending cash on
presents for themselves, what’s there for
a pleb like me?
Well, here’s a little something from
boston.com: Their eminent tech writer/
geeky dreamboat Hiawatha Bray is back,
with a new webicle! The video isn’t as
funny as his last one (in which he scoffed
at people waiting in line to buy the new
iPhone with a pleasant, lilting hatred),
but this one does feature him aimlessly
documenting random boring shit on
Boston Common, armed with a backpack,
flag pin, two cameras and a disturbingly
wide grin. The voiceover for the video has
its moments, from “Believe it or not, this
is Boston in December. I’m saving this
gorgeous day for posterity … with not
one, but two video cameras, each small
enough to fit in a shirt pocket” to “Still,
the MinoHD takes marvelous pictures. If
you’ve only got one shirt pocket, this is
the video camera to carry.”
But, because Bray does his job (unlike,
say, Alex Beam, who, in case you care,
hates dangerous toys lists and bought his
son a slingshot … apparently Beam’s job
description is still “cranky old man”), most
of the video is a legit review comparing
two gadgets. We recommend seeing it
once for reals and then with the sound
off; on mute, it feels like you’re watching
someone with too many toys have a very
pleasant acid trip. And isn’t that what the
holiday season is all about?
TIPS? THOUGHTS?
MEDIAFARM@WEEKLYDIG.COM

soapbox by julie bogart
Fire me the right way
A few weeks ago, I was laid off. The organization I worked for lost a
few million dollars (don’t you just hate it when that happens?) and
had to cut 30 jobs.
Of course, I’m not alone in my current predicament. As economic
times worsen and then worsen some more—a 20-year veteran at the
Massachusetts Division of Unemployment Assistance told me that
the month of November was the “worst she’s ever seen it”—com-
panies have been laying off employees at a rate higher than that of
teenage pregnancy in Gloucester. These days, if you haven’t been laid
off yourself, you know someone who has been.
Unfortunately, many companies are new to the mass-firing scene.
Nonprofits, for example, known for their touchy-feely handling of
employees, have no idea how to manage their new responsibilities—
which is why a few “don’ts” may help guide them as they continue to
crush hopes and dreams.
For starters, don’t lay employees off on a national holiday. Or, say,
Election Day. On November 4th, the agency I worked for announced
that they might have to/probably would be eliminating half the staff.
Talk about a buzz kill. Let’s just say that there were two reasons I
drank an entire bottle of champagne on election night.
Don’t make your employees sit through weeks or months of lim-
bo. For an entire week, my former coworkers and I anxiously played
Guess Who’s Getting Canned (as in “It’s gonna be me.” “No, let me
tell you why it’s gonna be me.”) If I have an ulcer, it’s on my previous
employer … though after stripping me of my health insurance, what
the fuck do they care?
Another piece of advice: Don’t tell some employees and not oth-
ers who’s getting the axe prior to the axing. This seems obvious, but
then, a lot of what I’m writing seems obvious. You’re shutting down
my income, my insurance, my daily purpose and my future plans. Do
you really have to ruin the few friendships I managed to create while
working for you?
Lose the armed guards. Seriously. When a friend of mine was laid
off last week, a dude with a gun on his belt escorted him to his office,
watched as he gathered his things, and then walked him out of the
building. My friend had given four years of his life to that place. Not
to mention the fact that thus far, he hadn’t tried to kill any of his
coworkers. Didn’t he deserve better?
One final tip: When you show your employees the door, also show
them a modicum of respect. Save the condescending condolences for
the wife you verbally abuse at home.
alexandra charrow
Times are shitty. We all have to do our part to make them a little
less so. And while I know that there’s really no good way to throw
employees out on the street, you may still be able to salvage your
reputation—and your human decency.
table of contents
Bean Counter
The Dig’s
quality-of-life index
Letters
The MBTA has converted two cars on the Red Line to hold only
us
four seats in a car for the elderly and the disabled. The rest
News + features
of the general public will suffer great paranoia that is only
heightened by the existence of the anti-groping effort being
made by the MBTA. MINUS 1
Run out and get your Bratz dolls now, as the dolls will be
discontinued after Christmas. MGA Entertainment lost their
commerce
legal battle to Mattel and was ordered to discontinue their
inexplicably popular product. EVEN
The construction at Copley Station has been halted indefinitely
gift guide
as the installation of elevator shafts cracked the foundation
of Old South Church. Church services, including a wedding, will
continue as scheduled. That’s good news, since the last thing
Eats + drinks
the MBTA needs is an angry bridezilla on its hands. MINUS 2
Orders of chicken wings have gone down with the recession.
That’s one drastic cure to America’s obesity problem. PLUS 1
dig this
In a spectacular display of irony, Lorraine Henderson, the
regional director of Homeland Security, Customs and Border
Protection, has been charged with hiring undocumented im-
A + E
migrants to clean her home. EVEN
Music
Well, it ain’t murder, but OJ Simpson has been sentenced to
at least 15 years in prison for trying to steal back things he
movies
claimed had been stolen from him. EVEN
Boston might finally get flying cars!
arts
In just three weeks, Woburn is test-
ing its first “roadable aircrafts.”
WORDS
With any luck we’ll finally ditch the
quickly deteriorating Ts and hitch
comedy
us some high-powered flyin’ machines. MINUS 1
A photograph of Worcester native and Obama speechwriter
Comics
Jon Favreau cupping the boob of a cardboard Hillary Clinton
cut-out materialized on Facebook last week. Clinton spokes-
Classifieds
man Philippe Reines’ response? “Senator Clinton is pleased to
learn of Jon’s obvious interest in the State Department, and is
currently reviewing his application.” Can this administration
get any wackier? PLUS 1
ADULT
Speaking of, Clinton’s vacated Senate seat is causing quite a
exit polls
stir, as everyone likes Caroline Kennedy (especially Red Sox
fans), but Fran Drescher (aka the Nanny) would gladly take the
seat, in case anyone cares. EVEN

Former State Sen. Dianne Wilkerson appears in court for fed-
eral arraignment and … urp … bail review, proving yet again
that a $23,500 bribe is not worth a $50,000 bail bond. Hey,
and good luck finding an impartial jury for this one! MINUS 1
Most of the money raised by former Gov. Mitt Romney’s politi-
cal action committee has not gone toward supporting other
GOP candidates (par for the course), but toward hiring his own
staff for a possible 2012 presidential run. Can you imagine a
primary debate between him and Palin? Between his equivo-
cating and her tenuous grasp on the English language, logical
thought would spontaneously combust. MINUS 1
This week’s total: MINUS 4
Last week’s total: MINUS 23
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WEEKLYDIG.C0M

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 commerce

table of contents
dept
of

Letters
yelpstop | milton station green land | canopy verde eats | Charcuterie lupec | bloody mary second glass | last-minutes saviors

us
News + features
essential

commerce
the

gift guide
last-minute

Eats + drinks
holiday
shopping

dig this
A + E
guide

Music
movies
Gifts to compliment

arts
impromptu consumption

WORDS
comedy
Comics
Classifieds
COMPILED BY JAMIE GRANOFF | WRITTEN BY DIG STAFF
ILLUSTRATIONS BY ELLEN CRENSHAW

ADULT
Whether en route to a party,

exit polls
the family dinner or that
special celebratory date, chances are 11

you may have forgotten someone on

your list. That, or you’re waiting for a
mid-month paycheck. Whatever your
reasons, we’re here to make the shopping
schlep as painless as possible. Online ordering
will take some advance planning, but
procrastinators can’t be choosers.
 coworker
WRITER’S BLOCK NOTEPAD | $10
This colorful assortment of paper will make a
neighboring trashcan more appealing when
your aspiring novelist coworker gets stuck on
Chapter 37. Hey, at least you don’t have to hear
about the story (maybe).
[Available at Black Ink, 5 Brattle St., Cambridge.
617.497.1221. blackinkboston.com]

ITTY BITTY BUDDHA | $7.95

Carve-your-own card | $14 That peace-loving, beatnik colleague will defi-
Whittle your own tidings with these wooden
nitely appreciate a small Buddha that comes with
postcards, using keys (or other sharp object) to
incense, incense holder, a book about Buddhism (so
hand-carve your message. Your mailman may suffer
he’ll finally know what the hell he’s talking about)
a splinter, but that newbie in accounting might
and packaging that turns into a portable shrine.
finally respond to your Gchat invites.
[Available at Hidden Sweets, 25 Brattle St.,
[Available at the ICA Store, 100 Northern Ave.,
Cambridge. 617.497.2600. hiddensweets.com]
Boston. 617.478.3100. icastore.org]

LIGHT-BLUE CRYSTAL PEN | $8.95

Spork | $3
Before “internet” and “liger,” there was “spork,”
everyone’s favorite portmanteau. Though one of the
only items used almost exclusively in schools and
prisons, it’s also perfect for slurping Ramen at your desk.
[Available at The Museum of Useful Things, themut.com]
Like, oh my god! This pen totally will make rainbows and
sparkles dance around the room! Is that coworker just too
perky before you’ve had your second cup of coffee? Smack
her over the head with this gem.
[Available at Papyrus at the Prudential Center,
800 Boylston St., Boston. 617.262.6520. papyrusonline.com]

DISAPPEARING CIVIL LIBERTIES MUG | $9.99

DA BOMB STICKY NOTES | $1.50
A great “fuck you” gift for that crotchety coworker
For the hopelessly uncool, these sticky notes will ex-
who’s still angry John McCain lost. The Bill of Rights
pand slang vocabulary and teach one how to properly
inscribed on the side of this mug vanishes when you
use “da bomb” in a sentence. Bonus gift to you, know-
pour a hot liquid inside it.
ing it’ll irk your cube-mates even more.
[Available at Newbury Comics, newburycomics.com]
[Available at Knock Knock, knockknock.biz]

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WEEKLYDIG.C0M

“Buy your friend a drink” gift card | prices vary

Drink for the job you want! Pink slip-proof your position by
buying your cubicle neighbor a cocktail. These gift cards are
redeemable at bars and restaurants like Good Life and Om. Make
12
it a two-martini lunch and get one for yourself, too.
[Available at BuyYourFriendADrink.com]
 exit polls ADULT Classifieds Comics comedy WORDS arts movies Music A + E dig this Eats + drinks gift guide commerce News + features us Letters table of contents
13
 family
(nuclear)

WHISKEY STONES | $15

Because your grizzled Grandpa (or Grandma!) loves whiskey on
the rocks but hates it when those rocks melt and make the drink
all watery and prissy. Whiskey Stones retain the cold to keep a
glass-o-booze at the perfect temperature, and they're completely
reusable, so Gramps can get crunk on a regular basis.
[Available at Lekker Unique Home Furnishings, 1317 Washington
St., Boston. 617.542.6464. lekkerhome.com]

CHRISTMAS CHOCOLATE BOX | $18

Walking through the door come Christmas, divert atten-
tion from your new neck tattoo with a box of chocolates.
Especially these little guys—in a cute wooden box, you get
16 chocolates and their signature mouse. Pair it with some
Cabernet to be extra lush. And buy a turtleneck.
[Available at LA Burdick Chocolate, 52-D Brattle St., Cam-
bridge. 617.491.4340. burdickchocolate.com]

“You Annoy Me” 8” x 10” print | $50

Give the gift of truth to your tween-angsty
sibling. Local artist Kati Rowley’s pen and ink
drawing with fingerprinted text is available
matted and ready to frame. With love.
[Available at Koo De Kir, koodekir.com]
VINAIGRETTE SET | $72.80
Assist in the kitchen, even from afar! For the cook, this package
of olive oil from Greece and vinaigrette from Modena, Italy, plus
salt mix for pastas and salads, black pepper from Madagascar and
olive-wood salad utensils, is sure to delight.
[Available at O&Co, 161 Newbury St., Boston. 617.859.8841.
oliviersandco.com]

12

INMAN OASIS GIFT CERTIFICATE | $25

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17 Treat the woman who was in labor with you for 4,789 HOURS to
08
a 15-minute chair massage and 15-30 minutes of tub time.
[Available at Inman Oasis, 243 Hampshire St., Cambridge.
TEMPUR-PEDIC SLIPPERS | $39.99
WEEKLYDIG.C0M

617.491.0176. inmanoasis.com]
Like heaven-sent foot pillows, these cush slippers will hug
your mom’s every step. While Tempur-pedic’s bedding
(also cloud-like) may fall outside of your price range,
theeir functional footwear does not.
14 [Available at Brookstone, 100 Huntington Ave., Boston.
617.267.4308. brookstone.com]
 exit polls ADULT Classifieds Comics comedy WORDS arts movies Music A + E dig this Eats + drinks gift guide commerce News + features us Letters table of contents
15
 family
(extended)
MEN IN DENIM MEN’S
T-SHIRT | $30
Blue-collar family? Let us
rephrase. Blue-blooded paterfa-
milias? Nope, wrong again. How
about: If a T-shirt and jeans are
his standard work uniform, con-
sider getting this for your uncle.
[Available Proletariat, 36 JFK St.,
Cambridge. 617.661.3865.
arevolt.netfirms.com]
FRUIT-POWERED ALARM CLOCK | $15
The perfect gift for the future scientist in your
family. It may look like a bomb when it’s as- THOMAS PAUL MATRYOSKA RED TOTE | $36
sembled, but don’t be mistaken … this toy is There is something about those little Russian dolls
more like DA BOMB! [Cringe—Ed.] that really gets people going. Maybe it’s the idea that
you get more bang for your buck. Either way, this bag
[Available at Fat Brain Toys, fatbraintoys.com] should be a hit for anyone who loves nesting … dolls.
[Available at Grand, 374 Somerville Ave., Somerville.
617.623.2429. grandthestore.com]

BUBBLE WRAP CALENDAR | $29.99

This calendar was made for the obsessive-
compulsive or anyone who just gets an
overwhelming satisfaction from popping
things—like your face! Just looking at
them all could make one take off their
shoes and stomp for instant gratification,
but nay—just one a day.
HOLLY GOLIGHTLY SLEEP MASK | $14
[Available at PrankPlace, prankplace.com]
If life were like Breakfast at Tiffany’s, things would be
pretty sweet. Who wouldn’t want to be a classy call girl
with multiple identities that runs away from her family
and still gets a happy ending? With this sleep mask, at
least your granny can dream about it.
TABLE SOCCER FOOSBALL | $40
Nieces and nephews alike will relish their time spent with this [Available at Fredflare, fredflare.com]
foosball table. While inexpensive and convenient for you, it will be a
chance for them to explore competitive sports outside of beer pong.
[Available at Urban Outfitters, 361 Newbury St., Boston.
617.236.0088. urbanoutfitters.com]

12
STICKER FRAMES | $25.95
10 Say goodbye to your wooden and
08
– MARC JACOBS GEM NECKLACE | $19 plastic frames. These stickers allow
12
17 Can’t afford that $1,500 Marc Jacobs handbag? Well we’re
08 your great-grandmother to have
bringing your loved ones a very small step closer to those
all your favorite pictures on display
designer goods. It’s only $19 and your aunt can go around
WEEKLYDIG.C0M

without taking up valuable space.

saying things like, “Watch it, it’s Marc Jacobs.”
[Available at Paper Source,
[Available at Marc Jacobs, 81 Newbury St., Boston.
338 Boylston St., Boston. 617.536.3444.
617.425.0707. marcjacobs.com]
paper-source.com]
16
 exit polls ADULT Classifieds Comics comedy WORDS arts movies Music A + E dig this Eats + drinks gift guide commerce News + features us Letters table of contents
17
 host/
hostess

Port and Chocolate GIFT BASKET | $49.95

Ring in 2009 with this Dionysian basket of pleasure and
witness subsequent influx of future party invitations. A bottle
of Bogle Petit Sirah Port with a Vosges chocolate bar and a
Café-Tasse bar is perfect for sharing on New Year’s Eve.
[Available at Wine Gallery, wine-gallery.com]

CANDY CANE SHOT GLASSES | $6.95 for set of two

Shot glasses made out of delicious candy cane. The perfect
at-the-ready hostess will delight (and ponder which booze
will work best) when you present her with this functional
and fun spin on glassware.
[Available at KitchenArts, 161 Newbury St., Boston.
617.266.8701. store.kitchenarts.biz]
Lavender Hand soap | $12
Engineered by specialists from “the oldest apothecary
in America,” this soap will leave fresh even the most
Dorito-stained fingers, while the lavender infusion
relaxes your likely wigging-out hostess.
[Available at C.O. Bigelow, Copley Place Mall, 100 Hun-
tington Ave., Boston. 617.236.7257. bigelowchemists.com]

MINI LED CHANDELIER | $20

Keep it classy with this mini chandelier. Add ambiance to any
Allston abode instantly with this decorative lighting scheme
that screams aesthetically appealing and friendly to the frugal. PHILLIPS CANDY HOUSE
[Available at Joie de Vivre, 1792 Mass. Ave., Cambridge. HOT COCOA | $6.50
617.864.8188. joiedevivre.net] Help heat up your host’s soirée
with hot cocoa from Boston’s oldest
chocolatier. Throw some vanilla Dr.
McGillicuddy’s in the mix, and you
TOOTHPICK VOODOO DOLL HOLDER | $12 may as well gather outside.
Not too excited about that holiday get-together? Be polite
[Available at Phillips Candy
while plotting to destroy with this charming toothpick holder.
House, 818 Morrissey Blvd., Boston.
Both functional and fun—toy for some, a weapon for others.
617.282.2090. phillipschocolate.com]
[Available at Funusual, 8 North Market, Faneuil
Hall Marketplace, Boston. 617.439.8840. funusual.com]

HANUKKAH COOKIE CUTTERS

| $3.95 each
12 These dreidel, Star of David and
10
08 menorah shapes are bound to make
–
12 the Jewish-mother-in-training of
17
08 MAD GAB | $32 your crew go wild. They’re doubly
Board games, especially played while useful as stencils for an arts and
WEEKLYDIG.C0M

intoxicated, are crowd pleasers. Designated crafts get-together (read: Enlist your
driver? Well, your host is still sure to get friends to help decorate, drunkenly).
a kick out of how absolutely moronic her
[Available at Crate & Barrel,
party will sound while playing this game.
199 Boylston St., Chestnut Hill.
[Available at The Games People Play, 617.964.8400. crateandbarrel.com]
18
1100 Mass. Ave., Cambridge. 617.492.0711.
thegamespeopleplaycambridge.com]
 table of contents
main
squeeze

Letters
us
News + features
SEPHORA SCENT SAMPLER FOR
HIM AND HER | $50 each

commerce
Taking the guesswork out of
perfumery, this ingenious set
allows your beloved to sample scents

gift guide
at home (allowing one’s natural
chemistry to also take full effect)
and redeem the enclosed voucher for
the cologne of their choice.

Eats + drinks
[Available at Sephora, 800 Boylston St.,
Boston. 617.262.4200. sephora.com]

dig this
RABBIT HABIT | $82 Sterling Silver Scrabble
How considerate will you look when she unwraps Letter Necklace | $75

A + E
this orgasm-inducing superstar? Time will only tell. Every family has one—they email you

Music
Yes, it’s the vibrator made famous on Sex and the City, Words of the Day and subscribe to ESPN
but the Habit is the updated design. just for the annual US Scrabble Open.
This adorable necklace will win you points

movies
[Available at Good Vibrations, 308-A Harvard St.,
Brookline. 617.264.4400. goodvibes.com] with the word freak in your fam.
[Available at Oak, 31 Gloucester St., Boston.

arts
857.362.7311. oakboston.com]

WORDS
comedy
ICA Boston Dual Membership | $95
Staring into each other’s eyes while using words like
“visceral experience” and “sensory juxtaposition” is

Comics
great intellectual stimulation. With a dual membership, FLEUR DE LIS CUFFLINKS | $56.25
it’s also a gift to yourself—shh, they’ll never know. A little flourish never hurt anyone. These

Classifieds
[Available at the ICA, 100 Northern Ave., mother of pearl and onyx baubles will add
Boston. 617.478.3100. icaboston.org] a little distinction to any French cuff.
[Available at J Press, 82 Mt. Auburn St.,

ADULT
Cambridge. 617.547.9886. jpressonline.com]

exit polls
19

FLOYD’S CUT | $26

For those who have yet to get the hint. Floyd’s
is the new game in town—the barber shop
with a hip twist. For the dude, nothing but
nothing beats a face shave, and your girl will
melt with a massage shampoo.
[Available at Floyd’s 99, 189 Mass. Ave., Boston.
617.236.4838. floydsbarbershop.com]
Chocolate Tasting:
“From Bean to Bar” class | $55
Fruity? Spicy? Nutty? Make it a date and
together discover the history, varieties and
processing techniques of the aphrodisiacal
bean. Across the street is the Hotel
Commonwealth. Convenient!
[Available at Boston Center for Adult Education,
5 Commonwealth Ave., Kenmore Sq., Boston.
617.267.4430. bcae.org]
 multi-culti/environmentalist
(hippie)
DISCOVERING THE BOSTON HARBOR ISLANDS | $17.95
What good environmentalist hasn’t traversed the Harbor Islands?
Whether camping on Grape Island, building a bonfire on
Spectacle Island or spooking yourself at Fort Warren, this
book can tell them how to do it and why.
[Available at Amazon.com]
Pouch of 5 reusable shopping totes | $38
When your roommate complains her Odwalla is
sweating through her Jansport, present her with
these five fauna-print bags. They hold up to 40 pounds
each and roll into a pouch, perfect for spontaneous
bulk granola purchases.
[Available at Fiddlehead, 292 Newbury St., Boston.
617.247.1120. fiddleheadshop.com]
Healthy Homes cleaning service | PRICES VARY
You may not know it, but your apartment is wheezing.
The folks at this eco-friendly maid service want to clean
your space—from a stovetop wipe-down to cobweb re-
moval, even a consultation on how to permanently
detox your chemical-ridden living quarters.
[Available at Healthy Homes Cleaning,
healthyhomescleaning.com. 781.926.0266]
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12 I (HEMP LEAF) HEMP SWEATSHIRT | $49.95
Show off that weed wit with this snuggly alterna-
17
08
tive to the hoodie. Never mind that the translation
WEEKLYDIG.C0M
of this reads “I Hemp Hemp,” or “I Marijuana Leaf
Hemp,” that’s just the herb talking.
[Available at The Hempest, 207 Newbury St., #1,
Boston. 617.421.9944. store.hempest.com]
20
Earthopoly game | $24.95
Collect “carbon credits” and trade them
for “clean air” to increase the property
values of your plots. Even the game
pieces are natural (e.g., rocks, shells,
lima beans). Boardwalk always needed
some wind turbines.
[Available at Greenward, 1776 Mass. Ave.,
Porter Sq., Cambridge. 617.395.1338.
greenwardshop.com]
“BOTTOMS UP” ALL NATURAL
T-SHIRT WITH GRAPHIC | $60
Green chic and cheeky, check. This soft
T is made with all-organic cotton and
sports a whale wave graphic, embolden-
ing other Greenpeacers to approach.
[Available at Envi, 164 Newbury St.,
Boston. 617.267.3684. shopenvi.com]
SUN JAR | $40
Banish seasonal affective disorder forever with
this solar-powered sunshine-on-tap. Set the
jar outside during the day, and enjoy the jar’s
warm glow at night. Nighttime more your
friend’s speed? There’s a Moon Jar as well.
[Available at Greenward, 1776 Mass. Ave.,
Cambridge. 617.395.1338. greenwardshop.com]
THE MICRO TERRARIUM FROM
URBAN OUTFITTERS | $6
A mini garden sans indoor worm farm? Sold.
This self-contained ecosystem can sprout your
choice of polka-dotted plant, cacti, herbs, flowers
or a Venus flytrap! Give the gift of pesticide-free
insect control this holiday season.
[Available online at Urban Outfitters,
urbanoutfitters.com]
OM PENDANT NECKLACE > SATYA | $48
Your yoga freak friend-set will appreciate this
reminder of the inner peace attained through
the infinite “OM.” Its simple sterling silver
construction is bound to match any minimalist’s
wardrobe as well.
[Available at Good, 88 Charles St., Boston.
617.722.9200. shopatgood.com]
 exit polls ADULT Classifieds Comics comedy WORDS arts movies Music A + E dig this Eats + drinks gift guide commerce News + features us Letters table of contents
21
 YELPSTOP

Milton Station | Red Line Mrs. Jones

VE
7A

ESTER!
Fresh footprints lead to fresh pies Windy City

SHING
Pizza

TON

$ORCH
by leighann farrelly | Yelp boston

3T
S3T
The Fat Black !DAM
Coffee
When Robert Frost wrote about “taking the road 3T
2IVER Company
less traveled,” we think he was on to something. This
week, we opt for the less-worn path of Boston’s own
divergence of trails, treading lightly on the trolleys of -),4/.
#%.42!,
the Ashmont-Mattapan High Speed Line. Follow us to Espirit
Milton Station and see the difference for yourself.
!6%.5%
Du Vin T
For a little Southern-style satisfaction, yelpers sing T %LIOT
3T
the praises of soul food sensation Mrs. Jones [2255

!DAM
Dorchester Ave., Dorchester. 617.696.0180]. The smell

alone transports Kim P “back to a Fourth of Ju-ly picnic,
replete with ants, a game of horseshoes [and] the
smell of BBQ,” but it’s the chicken that’s made a repeat
customer of Al N, because they use “wing quarters only—no
messing around with dry, bland, useless breasts.”
Hankering for a slice? The sauce-and-cheese joint of choice
in this nabe is Windy City Pizza [516 Gallivan Blvd., Dorchester
Center. 617.265.6666. windypizza.com]. Pat B describes their pies
as “hot and delicious with a nice crust,” and the buffalo chicken
dishes have Matt F, Dan M, Em C, and Jamie S calling this their
go-to spot.
Wine and cheese? Yes, please! says LeeAnn B about Espirit Du
Vin [25 Central Ave., Milton. 617.296.9463], where she picks up
“bread, desserts, balsamic vinegar, cheese, and of course wine!”
The knowledgeable staff makes Espirit a destination for vino
S3T
newbies, while the Friday wine tasting is a wonderful way to
accelerate your aged-grape education.
For those of you in need of a caffeine fix, The Fat Black Cof-
fee Company’s Dot outpost [1170 Washington St., Dorchester.
617.298.1800. flatblackcoffeecompany.com] serves up a solid
cup of fair-trade joe. This “charming grassroots brews-its-own,
Aussie-inspired coffee shop” draws in Kendra S with vanilla iced
lattes, and Jake F downs their delectable hot chocolate, even in
the dead of summer.
Have you tried a different path lately? Tell us on yelp.com.

green land

Canopy Verde
Carrying your goods, greener
By Jamie Granoff

C
anopy Verde is taking the saying
“it’s in the bag,” to an entirely new
level. Established in the fall of 2008,
this eco-chic handbag company unveiled
its debut line, defined as “modern meets
earth-friendly.” Each of the bags is made
from all-natural materials like organic
cotton and bamboo, and only uses chemi-
12
10 cal-free embroidery and chrome-free
08
– leather. They come in a variety of colors,
12
17 shapes and sizes, like the gym-bag-perfect
08
Dandelion Duffel or the sizeable Juniper
Tote. This larger handbag has a long
WEEKLYDIG.C0M
the “reuse, recycle” values that she would
later incorporate into her handbag line. To
try and spread the message of practic-
ing eco-friendly techniques even further,
Wong has teamed up with Chinese
manufacturers to construct her bags. The
company also buys the all-natural materi-
als locally, creating demand for those
products in the area.
Canopy Verde’s just another way you
can be easy on the earth and the eyes.
[Calamint Clutch and Juniper Tote avail-

strap, multiple zippered pockets and tiny
wooden feet. The Calamint Clutch is small
enough to carry on your wrist and has a
removable strap.
22 Linda Wong, founder of Canopy Verde,
has always been dedicated to green living.
Growing up in Taiwan, she was taught
able at Envi, 164 Newbury St., Boston.
617.267.3684. shopenvi.com; and Turtle,
619a Tremont St., South End, Boston.
617.266.2610. turtleboston.com. Dandelion
Duffel available at Urban Living Studio, 58
Clarendon St., Boston. 617.247.8150. urban-
livingstudios.com. canopyverde.com]
 exit polls ADULT Classifieds Comics comedy WORDS arts movies Music A + E dig this Eats + drinks gift guide commerce News + features us Letters table of contents
23
 eats + drinks
Charcuterie for carnivores
How to win meaty praise this holiday
roundup BY BEN WHELAN
The thought of edible homemade holiday
gifts often brings to mind those heavy,
boozy fruitcakes that sit at the back of the
fridge until Easter. This year, for a change
of pace, give the gift that’s sure to be a
conversation starter: cured meat.
Employ the French technique of char-
cuterie, the art of making pâtés, terrines,
sausages and the like, to delight your
favorite carnivore with a tasty treat.
“I think charcuterie is a great gift idea;
you can really go a long way at home be-
fore you need any fancy kitchen gadgets,”
chef Chris Bauer of Sel de la Terre says,
“and pork is the king of charcuterie.”
Bauer continues, “I really love using
pork because it not only has tremendous
flavor, but it has the ideal fat to protein
ratio that you need for any kind of curing,
and it’s also easy to grind.”
His gift choice for the home-charcutier
is the pork pâté that he currently serves at
the restaurant’s Long Wharf location. “It’s
basically just a ground pork butt, which
has a great ratio of fat to meat, emulsified
in a food processor or blender with salt
and red wine. It’s really simple, but it’s
really delicious.”
For one of Boston’s foremost charcu-
tiers, chef Jamie Bissonette of Toro, the
chicken rillette is the way to go when you
are in the gift-giving spirit.
“A rillette,” Bissonette informs via
kitchen telephone, “is basically a rough
spread made of puréed meat—tradition-
ally pork. Duck and chicken are also often
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WEEKLYDIG.C0M
24
Subscriptions available exclusively online @
beeradvocate.com
pickled beef tongue from Hungry Mother
“I do it partly out of respect for the whole
animal, but the tongue just has such a rich,
beefy, full flavor.”
used and it is typical to do a confit,” a pro-
cess in traditional French cooking where
the meat is slow-cooked in its own fat. “A
lot of times, I’ll make a rillette as a gift for
other chefs when I’m going to an expo in
another city.”
Another important element of the
charcuterie world is pickled or brine-cured
meats, and the obvious place to turn to for
which are usually on the smaller side
(two to three pounds), and brines them
overnight to help tenderize the meat
before slow-braising them with spices and
vegetables the next day.
“I do it partly out of respect for the
whole animal, but the tongue just has
such a rich, beefy, full flavor. I stumbled
across it this summer when I was working
with a farm selling beef, and it was always
one of the underutilized cuts. I’m really
happy that I’ve been able to turn people
on to it,” Maiden explains. “Like a lot of
charcuterie, people are really intimidated
by it, but it’s just a really great recipe.”
So don’t be scared; skip the homemade
fudge this year and grab some butt or
slip someone you care about the tongue
[Ew—Ed.]. It’s sure to be a gift they’ll hap-
pily digest and fondly remember.
CHECK OUT WEEKLYDIG.COM FOR THE
RECIPIES FEATURED HERE: CHRIS BAUER’S
PORK PâTé, JAMIE BISSONETTE’S CHICKEN
RILLETTE, BARRY MAIDEN’S PICKLED BEEF
TONGUE AND THE AUTHOR’S OWN DEUX
FOIE PÂTÉ.
advice on the subject is Southern-French
specialist Barry Maiden of Hungry Mother.
Maiden’s pickled beef tongue has been a
menu staple since the kitchen opened last
March, and it’s been turning heads and
palates ever since.
Benjamin Darfler
“Well, it’s not a true pickle; it’s really
more of a slow braise,” Maiden points
out. For his recipe, he uses calves’ tongues,
 exit polls ADULT Classifieds Comics comedy WORDS arts movies Music A + E dig this Eats + drinks gift guide commerce News + features us Letters table of contents
25
 Bloody Mary Last-Minute Crowd
Gruesome and delish: how the Pleasers
brunch standard came to be Bottles to treat the boozer in your life
lupec By HANKY PANKY + PINK LADY the second glass by Tyler Balliet

For many, a good Bloody Mary is a key

The gift of booze is incredibly versatile. It can say, “Let’s
component of the quintessential lei-
celebrate this festive holiday season together,” as easily
surely brunch. But how did this eerily
as, “Let’s drink to numb the pain of this God-forsaken
named, spicy, salty cocktail come to be?
time of year.” Even if the person receiving the gift
The Bloody Mary was created by Fer-
doesn’t drink, they can always re-gift it. You also don’t
nand “Pete” Petiot at Harry’s American Bar in Paris in
have to sweat getting your boss the same thing as everyone else
1921. It was unique because it married two new things:
because if she gets three bottles of the same Champagne, she’ll be
vodka, which had recently been introduced to France
even more stoked than having received just one. Buying wine is really
by refugees from communist Russia, and canned
a no-lose holiday gift.
tomato juice, which arrived in Paris from the US after
World War I.
FORGETFUL, ULTRA-LAST-MINUTE SHOPPER
As one legend has it, the name refers to a woman
Don’t get stuck frantically searching your apartment
who was frequently left to sip Petiot’s cocktails in soli-
for something to wrap during a gift emergency: Prepare
tude while waiting for her gentleman friend at Harry’s
ahead of time by purchasing a few bottles of vino before
Bar. It compared her long, lonely hours waiting for her
the real madness starts. Dinner plans with rarely seen
beloved to the imprisonment of Mary Queen of Scots.
family members or visits from friends can happen
In 1933, the Astor family coaxed Petiot to move to
quickly and without warning, so make sure there are
New York to head up the King Cole Bar at the St. Regis
pre-wrapped bottles of delicious bubbly sitting ready to
Hotel, where the drink evolved. Vodka was not avail-
go in your closet. The N.V. Nino Franco Rustico Prosecco,
able stateside, so the New York version featured gin.
an Italian bubbly, is usually a summer treat, but it’s a
Also, the St. Regis’ swanky management was put off by
great quick gift. It’s a classy and sophisticated sparkling,
the gruesome name, and redubbed it the Red Snapper
but unlike its expensive French equal, this wine clocks in at
before adding it to their repertoire.
less than $20 a bottle.
In the 1950s, the cunning marketers at Smirnoff
quickly brought the Bloody Mary back to its roots.
FOR THE ALPHA MALE IN YOUR LIFE
The drink became a cornerstone of their legend-
Chances are there is a high-powered boss, law degree-holding brother-
ary campaign to introduce vodka to the American
in-law or punk-ass executive MBA student on your shopping list.
marketplace.
Instead of getting them golfwear or another team jersey to add to
The original Bloody Mary recipe (below) was quite
their collection, opt for a big, bold, karate chop-to-the-face bottle of
simple. The drink lends itself to variation, such as the
vino. California Cabernet has become the new “bottle of Scotch” as far
common inclusion of celery salt, horseradish and who
as gifts go, and the 2005 Darioush Cabernet Sauvignon is an awesome
knows what else. Here’s to innovation!
choice. It has every characteristic you’re looking for in a high-end Napa
Valley Cab, including a dark and manly looking label.
Cin-cin!
THE WHITE LOVER
The general rule of thumb is to only give someone white wine
if you know, beyond a reasonable doubt, that they really love
the stuff. There are so many “I only drink red” people out there
BLOODY MARY
that it’s not worth risking epic gift failure. With that said,
there are delicious whites from well-known producers that
1.5 oz vodka
are significantly less expensive than their red wine coun-
2 dashes Worcestershire
terparts. We go for the 2006 Flowers Sonoma Coast Chardonnay from
sauce
California because it has some brand recognition, but also because it’s
4 dashes Tabasco sauce
a killer bottle of Chardonnay.
pinch of salt and pepper
0.25 oz fresh lemon juice
STOCKING STUFFERS
4 oz tomato juice
If you have a handful of people to thank this year, consider a half-bot-
tle of dessert wine. Yeah, we know—this sweet, lightly fizzy, low-alcohol
12 Build in a mixing glass.
10 Italian beverage is not everyone’s cup of tea, but the 2007 Michele
08 Roll back and forth in a
– Chiarlo “Nivole” Moscato d’Asti is just so damn good. The bottles are
12
tin. Strain into an ice-
17
physically small, so you can stuff them in stockings or add them to gift
filled glass.
08
bags stuffed with other sweets. Best yet, you can get these little bottles
WEEKLYDIG.C0M

for less than $15 each.

Drink more wine! for more information: thesecondglass.coM

26
FOR MORE GREAT CLASSIC “EYE-OPENERS,” CHECK OUT
LUPECBOSTON.COM.
 exit polls ADULT Classifieds Comics comedy WORDS arts movies Music A + E dig this Eats + drinks gift guide commerce News + features us Letters table of contents
27
 Justin
Kelly
contracting

Penguin Pizza

g r e a t p u b s t y l e f a r e

12
10
08
–
12
S e r v i n g L u n c h & D i n n e r e v e r y D ay
17
08 Huge sele ct ion of Imp or te d & Domest ic be ers on Draught & bot t le
WEEKLYDIG.C0M

Piano Sing-aLong
ever y friday Night wit h Mel st iller, 8pm-Midnight

28

3 1 - 3 7 st ua rt st. bO stO N 617-338-8586 W W W. JaC O bWIrtH.COM


Trinity IPA
From Rhode Island, with hops
BEERADVOCATE.COM BY JASON + TODD ALSTRöm
We always love challeng-
ing beer branding that
boasts how much you’ll
love the beer inside
before you even take a sip.
Bragging about medal wins is always a
plus too. So when we saw a six-pack of
Trinity IPA from the Trinity Beer Co. in
Providence, R.I., we had to take up their
challenge, which reads:
“If you like India Pale Ales, the most
bitter of the Pale Ale family, you’re sure
to enjoy this original English Style IPA.
First brewed in Providence at the Trinity
Brewhouse in 1994, its bright copper
color, fruity aroma and bitter refresh-
ing finish will keep you coming back for
more. Enjoy it, responsibly.”
We do like IPAs, and English IPAs, too.
A beer that keeps us coming back for
more? Bonus!
We also noticed that the beer is actu-
ally bottled by Cottrell Brewing Co. out
of Pawcatuck, Conn., for Trinity. Unless
they’re brewing at the brewpub and
shipping the beer to Cottrell for bottling,
it’s most likely being brewed at Cottrell
too. Not a bad thing. Contract brewing is
all the rage and on the rise with virtual
breweries popping up all over the world.
Regardless, the taste is what matters
to our palates. So less geekin’ and more
drinkin’ …
The Taste
Nice, bright and clear amber pour with
some lively carbonation that induces a
good finger-sized, ultra-creamy (near ni-
tro) white foam head that coats the glass
as it settles. Fruity esters in the nose,
along with some orchard notes, ripe
BEER EVENTs
Harpoon Beer Dinner
December 10
Join Harpoon Brewery and Grafton
Street for a multi-course meal paired
with fresh Harpoon brews. Here’s a peek:
black trumpet gnocchi (hand-rolled
gnocchi with black trumpet mushrooms,
mushroom brodo, parmesan and black
truffles) paired with Leviathan Series Bal-
tic Porter and a cassoulet (rendered duck
breast and smoked duck confit) paired
with 100 Barrel Series #25 Rauchfetzen.
[Grafton Street, 1230 Mass. Ave., Harvard
Sq., Cambridge. 617.497.0400. 6pm-
8pm/$35 for Friends of Harpoon, $40.
graftonstreetcambridge.com]
table of contents
Letters
stone fruit, hint of grapefruit and biscuit.
us
Bitter up front—near puckering—with
News + features
some salt, sharp citric rind edge and
astringency. Mild soap and some wood.
Carbonation gives a bit of a scrubbing
feel on the palate that is eventually
soothed by a creamy mouthfeel. Body is
commerce
quite light. Soft, fruity apple tones follow,
like you just took a bite—skin and all.
Hint of caramel as the beer warms, and
some biscuit too. Lingering biscuit in the
gift guide
finish, lemony hop notes and a growing
huskiness (like wheat germ) that results
in a not-so-clean finish or enjoyable ex-
Eats + drinks
perience as the beer gets even warmer.
Final Thoughts
Compared to IPAs from England, the bit-
terness is quite aggressive for the style,
dig this
the malt profile could use some cleaning
up and the flavors just don’t seem to meld
well, creating some unbalance. Drinking
A + E
this beer when it’s anything other than
Music
cold allows that huskiness to dominate
too—not overly tasty. That said, it’s not bad,
and gets a “B” (Good) on BeerAdvocate.com
movies
with 40 reviews—we’re leaning towards
a C+ (Decent). And 7-percent alcohol by
arts
volume? That’s the claim, but it’s nowhere
to be found—in headiness or label.
blick H
WORDS
We spied our samples for $7.99 a six- Pu o
pack at Whole Foods on River Street in
The
us
comedy
Cambridge. The adventurous may want
e
to visit the brewpub in Providence for a
pint on draft. Eat Drink
Comics
Good Better
FOR MORE INFO: TRINITYBREWHOUSE.COM
Food. Beer.
Classifieds
For more beer education:
BeerAdvocate.com
en
beer
Respect Beer.
ADULT
ch
ba
r kit
exit polls
Christmas Beer Brunch w/
BeerAdvocate + Upstairs on the Square
December 14 29
Join BeerAdvocate’s Candice Alström and
Upstairs’ wine director Matt Reiser for
a festive holiday brunch: three-courses,
each paired with a tasty beer. The menu
will include savory crepes with salmon,
eggs Benedict with honey ham, apple
cider cake, plus a welcoming course of
holiday breads. Call for reservations!
[Upstairs on the Square, 91 Winthrop St.,
Harvard Sq., Cambridge. 617.864.1933.
1pm/$38. upstairsonthesquare.com]
For additional info and more beer
events: BeerAdvocate.com
 Christmas. But as far as Barrington knew, he was the only bunny in the forest, and he had no family with which to party. He attempted to join a family
All of the other forest animals had gotten together in ther homes to celebrate
dig this
Dicks and jane,
at space 242.
wednesday 12.10
rap till you spit nails
Mac Lethal
Kansas City rap phenomenon
Mac Lethal has more street cred
12 than all the punks of Allston Rock
10
08 City combined, and he’s come to
–
12 rhyme circles around the college
17
08 ghetto. Now don’t let Missouri
turn you off—this performer/pro-
WEEKLYDIG.C0M
ducer proved he’s got the rocks
to work in the underground scene
with the likes of P.O.S. and Atmo-
sphere, to name-drop a few. The
show will also feature rhyme slay-
ers Grieves and Soulcrate Music.
30
[Harpers Ferry, 158 Brighton
Ave., Allston. 617.254.7380. 8pm/
18+/$10. harpersferryboston.com]
friday 12.12
artistic inebriation
Dicks and Jane
Art is dead. Space 242 is proving
that art rocks with their final
exhibition of 2008, Dicks and Jane,
featuring the artistic vision of the
Dig’s own Tak Toyoshima, Scott
Murry and Taylor Seidler. The great
minds behind the paintings will
be in attendance, ready to discuss
their process and inspirations and
perform favors in the alleyway for
lucrative art collectors. OK, fine,
not the last part.
[Space 242, 242 East Berkeley St.,
2nd Flr., Boston. 617.797.3191.
6pm/21+/free with RSVP.
space242.com]
friday 12.12
a very economical Christmas
Buon Natale Shopping Stroll
Following in the footsteps of
Mother Italy, the North End is
hosting its second annual Buon
Natale Holiday Shopping Stroll. All
the swanky stores up and down
Hanover Street (and Salem Street
and Prince Street and North
Bennet Street and Fleet Street)
will be joining in on the festivities
with carolers, refreshments and
discounts! Savings when it counts
and free food? What better way
to shop local?
[North End, Boston, 7pm-11pm]
friday 12.12
fear the reaper
Blue Öyster Cult
Thanks to Rock Band, everyone
who was sipping on their moth-
ers’ teat in the late ’70s can now
appreciate the heavy metal won-
der that she used to roll spliffs to.
Led by the original face-melting
force of Eric Bloom and Buck
Dharma, BÖC is out to prove that
they’ve still got what it takes to
rock your brain into mush. These
leather-clad geezers can blow the
fedora off every hipster in a five-
mile radius.
[Showcase Live, 23 Patriot Pl.,
Foxboro. 888.354.7042. 8pm/$26-
$46. showcaselive.com]
saturday 12.13
rock that intellect
Disappearer
There’s no reason rock can’t be smart,
and these Boston boys are a presence
to be witnessed, describing their
tracks as “searching through decades
past and exploring the unknown
chasms of the human psyche”—
which is an understatement. These
psychedelic rockers will leave
everyone impressed as they mix the
influence of Black Sabbath, Smashing
Pumpkins and Zeppelin, and produce
a sound that’s completely their own
and laced with trippy insights into
our own consciousness. Whoa.
[Great Scott, 1222 Comm. Ave.,
Allston. 617.566.9014. 9pm/
21+/$9. greatscottboston.com]
of squirrels, but was turned away from their festivities because he bore no physical resemblance to them. His eyes filling with tears, he sadly turned for
sunday 12.14
hipster heaven
Mass Market III
OK, we get it, you don’t like buy-
ing from big box chain companies.
Neither do we. Mass Market is
the DIY flea market of every-
thing a creative soul could desire.
Everyone from vinyl junkies to
bookbinders to clothing designers
and vegan bakers will be pushing
their wares for a fun-filled day of
bartering, selling and sharing. Put
down that PBR and head over. Or
rather, chug it first.
[Massachusetts College of Art and
Design, 621 Huntington Ave., Bos-
ton. 617.879.700. 12pm/all ages/$1.
masscraftmarket.blogspot.com]
monday 12.15
modern renaissance
Seven Times Salt
Seven Times Salt meticulously
absorbs every note and subtlety of
classical music and transforms it
into something modern audiences
can truly enjoy. Mixing dance
tunes with late 16th-century
compositions may seem next to
impossible, but the results take on
a life of their own, creating a clas-
sic, fresh sound. Catch them for
their sixth annual holiday concert,
Thys Endere Nyght.
[The Loring-Greenough House,
12 South St., Jamaica Plain.
617.524.3158. 8pm/all ages/free.
seventimessalt.com]
tuesday 12.16
oh the webs they weave
Deb Olin Unferth & M.T. Anderson
Brookline Booksmith is showcas-
ing two acclaimed authors for
double the book-signing pleasure.
Deb Olin Unferth debuts her first
novel, Vacation: a postmodern
tale of misshapen heads, amateur
detective work and windingly
interwoven events. M.T. Anderson’s
new book: The Astonishing Life of
Octavian Nothing: Traitor to the
Nation, Volume II: The Kingdom on
the Waves is the follow-up to his
National Book Award-winning first
installment.
[Brookline Booksmith, 279 Harvard
St., Brookline. 617.566.6660. 7pm/
free. brooklinebooksmith.com]
table of contents
home, resigned to spending Christmas Eve alone. Almost home, he heard the excited squeaking of field mice beneath the ground.
Letters
us
News + features
commerce
gift guide
Eats + drinks
dig this
A + E
Music
movies
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Comics
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ADULT
exit polls
wednesday 12.17 wednesday 12.17–sunday 1.4
oui oui anti-holiday hero
Shoot the Piano Player Santaland Diaries 31
The French are not always a great David Sedaris’ cult essay on the
source for feel-good films, and adventures of Crumpet the surly
Truffaut’s Shoot the Piano Player Christmas elf of Macy’s has made it
is no exception. Beginning with to the stage of the New Rep. In this
his wife’s suicide, classical pianist ever changing world, Sedaris’ sar-
Charlie Koller bottoms out and casm and wit are something we can
does the only thing he knows how always treasure. His biting words
to do: plays at a Parisian dive bar. and social critique lend to a hilari-
The somber plot continues with ous production following the story
troublesome brothers who bring of his seasonal work at America’s
the danger of gangland to his door- mother of all retail stores and his
step, leading to a harrowing look interaction with the Christmas-
inside the soul of a broken man. crazed loonies he encounters.
[Brattle Theatre, 40 Brattle St., [New Rep Theater, 321 Arsenal St.,
Harvard Sq., Cambridge. Watertown. 617.923.8487.
617.876.6837. 5:30pm & 7:30pm/ showtimes vary/$30. newrep.org]
$9.50. brattlefilm.org]
12
10
08
–
12
17
08
WEEKLYDIG.C0M

242
S P A C E

32

New England’s Culture Magazine

 arts entertainment
arts&entertainment
music | adam F + big bear movies | doubt + cadillac records + helvetica arts | 826 auction + stella’s David Wain
The List
TOP 10 DISCO CUTS
From Bob Diesel of the Boston House
Music Coalition
10 | Mandré—“Solar Flight (Opus 1)”
(Motown) 1977
9 | The Brothers—“Under the Skin” (RCA) 1976
8 | Players’ Association—“Ride the Groove”
(Vanguard) 1979
7 | Tony Paris—“Electric Automan”
(Vanguard) 1985
DESIGN NEARBY | PINK COMMA GALLERY
6 | Theo Vaness—“No Romance/Keep on
Dancin’/I’m a Bad, Bad
Cloth, Paper, Scissors Boy” (Prelude) 1979
As a kid, it was simple to seal the deal with “rock, paper, scissors.” As 5 | Montana—“Warp
Factor II” (Atlantic) 1978
adults, we can alleviate our holiday shopping misery with help from the
annual Design Nearby sale. Titled Cloth, Paper, Scissors, this year’s version
4 | Cher—“Take Me Home”
comes with 16 artists and their fresh, urban, holiday-inspired pieces. It’s
difficult to decide who to mention first. UMass-Dartmouth grad and de- (Casablanca) 1979
signer Shara Porter will sell some of her special remixed vintage accesso-
ries. The felt-inclined Joshua Stone will have some sweet coasters, holiday 3 | Kebekelektrik—“War
ornaments and vases all made out of industrial felt. Jennifer Hill’s “Places Dance” (Salsoul) 1978
I Have Never Been” collection puts an international (and imaginary) spin
on calendars. Dave Ortega, a flag-flying member of the Miracle 5 art 2 | Inner Life—“Ain’t No
Mountain High Enough
superhero group, vends some of his Geoskullz tees, which are very fly. And
(The Garage Version)”
don’t forget Pink Comma director Chris Grimley and wifey Kelly Smith, the
(Salsoul) 1981
founders of the Boston design studio Etcetera Media. They’ll all present up
Jennifer Hill, Joshua Stone + Shara Porter
to six pieces, with all sorts of shtuff for sale. With the well-deep, magnifi-
1 | Logg—“You’ve Got That Something”
cent design talent in the Hub, you can outfit your entire holiday giving
(Salsoul) 1981
with creative, handmade treasures … and get bonus karma to pawn onto
your Republican mom. [NAKIA HILL]
[Bob Diesel spins after the showing of Cin-
eMental Presents: The Godfather of Disco. Wed
[Design Nearby: Cloth, Paper, Scissors. Fri 12.12.08. Pink Comma Gallery,
12.17.08. Brattle Theatre, 40 Brattle St., Harvard
81B Wareham St., Boston. 617.426.4466. 6pm-11pm/free. pinkcomma.
Sq., Cambridge. 617.876.6837. 9:30pm/$10.
com, designnearby.com]
brattlefilm.org, truthserum.org]
table of contents
Letters
us
News + features
commerce
gift guide
DEFEND YOURSELf!
STEVE MACONE
Eats + drinks
BY ROB TURBOVSKY
Medford-native Steve Macone won Boston Universi-
ty’s 2006 Funniest Student Competition in his senior
dig this
year, opened for Dave Coulier of Full House, then got
an agent and now he’s rich. Well, not financially rich,
A + E
but he’s raking it in comedically with a clean act that
goofily contemplates life’s questions, big and small.
Music
As the Comedy Studio’s December “comic in resi-
dence,” he’ll open every show there for the month.
movies
ARE YOU MAKING A LIVING DOING STAND-UP?
I make a living doing comedy as well as freelance
arts
writing, though “living” is a strong word. Making
a “slowly dying while living at home with my
WORDS
parents” might be a better way to put it. Also,
working on a book.
comedy
DO YOUR PARENTS APPROVE OF YOUR CAREER?
They’re not as concerned about the trajectory or
Comics
specifics of my comedy career as they are about
whether I washed the dishes. They’re happy as long
as I wash the dishes.
Classifieds
HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE YOUR ACT?
My act has simultaneous elements of silliness
and seriousness (like a joke about the true es-
ADULT
sence of forgiveness), and I’m not sure that they
exist on opposite ends of a spectrum. I worked
exit polls
as a plumber for seven summers and I studied at
Oxford and I’ve traveled a lot—you stop seeing
things as polar opposites—silly versus serious, 33
smart jokes versus those with mass appeal—and
more as complementary.
WHAT DO YOU HOPE TO GET OUT OF YOUR
COMEDY STUDIO RUN?
I want to just hit it really hard and mix consistency
with innovation. I’m working on this one joke about
how nature isn’t even aware of how beautiful it is.
Pretty funny, huh? So, let’s check back in on that
one at the end of the month.
[Steve Macone at The Comedy Studio. Wed-Sun,
through 12.30.08. 1236 Mass. Ave., Harvard Sq.,
Cambridge. 8pm/all ages/$8 Sun, Wed, Thurs;
$10 Fri, Sat. 617.661.6507. thecomedystudio.com.
stevemacone.com]
 Wednesday, Dec 10 Monday, Dec 15
rock FREE PIZZA -
ELLIOTT MURPHY 8:30 PM (21+)
Jann Klose TEAM TRIVIA
starts 8:30
Thursday, Dec 11
West African pop Tuesday, Dec 16
SAMBA LOLO folk
NY Songwriters Circle
Friday, Dec 12 Mieka Pauley, Seth
roots rock Glier & more
Memphis Rockabily
Girl Howdy Wednesday, Dec 17
funk
ZAGNUTT
Saturday, Dec 13
pop upcoming shows:
BRONZE RADIO 12/18-Chandler
12
10 RETURN Travis’ X-Mas
08
–
12
12/19-Pressure Cooker
17 Sunday, Dec 14 12/20-Los Sugar Kings
08
Jazz Brunch 12/23-Old Time Music
w/ music 12/26-Playin’ Dead
WEEKLYDIG.C0M

9:00 -2:30 PM 12/27-Swinging

Blues Jam Johnsons
4:30 -8:30 12/31-Booty Vortex

34 17 Holland St., Davis Sq.

Somerville (617) 776-2004
Directly on T Red Line at Davis

www.johnnyds.com
 table of contents
Notables
Erinn Brown (often referred to as “2N”
because of the essential double consonant in
her name) has been playing stages all over Bos-
ton since the late ’90s. The sultry songstress

Letters
started out singing for rock cover bands while
ADAM F writing her own stuff, eventually releasing her

us
solo debut, Road Signs to the Sun, in 1999. Her
Has many balls to juggle latest solo album, Don’t Forget About It, is a

News + features
soulful mix of blues, jazz, funk, and folk rock.
PROFILE BY DAVID DAY Though she is now a solo artist, Brown is no
stranger to sharing the stage. Alongside Erinn
Brown Band drummer Steve Peabody, she’ll
Five times a day Adam be playing at the Clear Conscience Café, so

commerce
must kneel and pray to you know you can walk out with some good,
record crate #31. legitimately fair-trade and organic (and shade-
grown!) coffee. [Thu 12.11.08. 581 Mass. Ave.,

gift guide
Central Sq., Cambridge. 617.661.1580. 8pm/all
ADAM F ages/free. c3cafe.net]
WITH LENORE
PHOENIX LANDING

Eats + drinks
512 MASS AVE.
CENTRAL SQ., CAMBRIDGE
617.576.6260
10PM/19+/$7
MYSPACE.COM/PHOENIXLANDING

dig this
ADAMF.COM

A + E
henning ohlenbusch

Music
to catch up with Redman (they
produced “Smash Sumthin’” in

movies
2001). “To drive around with Red-
man and listen to tracks we’re
working on, it’s pretty cool, do Central Chambers is the deliciously

arts
you know what I mean?” he says. comforting third album from Northampton’s
The duo was “messin’ around” folk-pop quintet, Winterpills. Dual vocalists

WORDS
with some beats alongside Red’s Philip Price and Flora Reed have perfected the
partner in crime: Method Man. art of male-female harmony, while the oc-

comedy
Of course, DJing still gets casionally rough guitars and drumming offsets
Fenton the most excited. He still their poignant voices in the best of ways. The
The world of Adam Fenton, aka Adam F, is runs his own drum & bass label, Breakbeat group, praised everywhere from No Depres-

Comics
not exactly a waking nightmare. Produc- KAOS, and makes a good living off DJing. sion to the Village Voice, provides equal parts
ing renowned drum & bass/jazz album “There’s a night called Run in Bristol, which pop melodies and heartbreaking indie-rock

Colours put him on a path hardly anyone,
least of all him, would expect. “You have
dreams and desires when you’re younger,”
he says on the phone from Los Angeles,
I like playing in,” he says. “It’s a really small,
low-lit club and it has these old hanging
lights and whenever the crowd’s kicking off
they bang on the lights and hang off these
Classifieds
tunes highlighted by Price’s storytelling lyrics.
To celebrate the CD, the guys and girl will
be playing at Club Passim, Harvard Square’s
excellent home to all things crunchy and

ADULT
“but you realize life unfolds completely dif- cords and swing up and down. That’s a true folkified, a doubly good reason to go. [Sun
ferently and then you just get on with it.” and honest club to play in.” Then there’s 12.14.08. 47 Palmer St., Harvard Sq., Cam-

Although he is firmly established as a
drum & bass DJ, having cracked the UK pop
charts with singles like “Music In My Mind,”
his career has gone on to hip-hop and R&B
production, with names like Redman, LL
Cool J and M.O.P. Most recently, though,
he has become a film actor with a smaller
role in The Heavy and now, opposite British
acting legend Richard E. Grant, in the film
Cuckoo. While it’s not a stretch to play each
of these music-based characters, there’s
something about Fenton the camera loves.
“It’s not Lord of the Rings, know what I
mean?” he says with a laugh. “But it’s nice
to do something else that’s creative and
challenging and different.” Cuckoo is cur-
rently in post-production.
But Fenton is still in touch with his hip-
hop friends. While in LA, he had the chance
places he loves, like St. Petersburg, Russia.
“They do this huge party called Pirate Sta-
tion and there are 15,000 people. It’s like
Tiësto but with grimy drum & bass.”
The life of a DJ is a rough one indeed.
Even he was still deciding which gig to take
on New Year’s Eve, easily the biggest gig for
a DJ these days. “It’s either London as an
option, or Seattle, which I played last year,
or Hawaii,” he says. (Sounded like he was
leaning toward Hawaii.)
Is there a film with Redman, Method
Man and Fenton in the future? A fish-out-
of-water gangster caper set in Guy Ritchie’s
London? “That’s a good idea,” he says,
chuckling. “Life’s showing me you forget
about things, and then all of sudden, two
years later, it’s happening, but from a com-
pletely different angle.”
exit polls
bridge. 617.492.7679. 7:30pm/all ages/$15.
clubpassim.org]
35
MassArt’s showing of the Beat Research
class presentations is Boston’s yearly chance
to get into the heads of some beat-talented
brains. The scientists come from the classroom
of Professor DJ Flack (aka Antony Flackett),
where they’ve been studying everything from
old school to new school for school: sampling,
techniques, image and hip-hop’s presence in
pop culture. The students perform an array
of projects, including original tracks, videos
and even live performances. Hear what’s next
after next after next at the Enormous Room.
[Mon 12.15.08. 567 Mass. Ave., Central Sq.,
Cambridge. 617.491.5550. 9pm/18+/free.
enormous.tv]
 FIDELITY

Big Bear
BY JONATHAN DONALDSON

Don’t you just want to strum that guitar every once in a while, I think,
watching Big Bear as they rock the stage. Just a big fat C chord once
for the kids? But Big Bear’s not going to make it easy for you. Hard-
rock riffs, twists and tangles, unfamiliar modalities, skronky keys, big
broken beats and bending shouts jolt across the stage ... I’m kind of
not sure I’m in Boston anymore. Without a real central point of focus
in their tunes or presentation, Big Bear represents a high-sensory
brand of something caught between metal, classical and indie rock.
“It was supposed to be an arena rock band,” says guitarist and
chief music writer Joel Roston. Mission not accomplished. Roston’s
interest in classical music ultimately probably got in the way of
any “More Than A Feeling” aspirations. But they do have a keyboard
player who stands (that would be Joanne Dill). She and Roston are
the melodic beast of the band, tirelessly cranking out sequences of
completely off-kilter runs that take a while to get used to, but even-
tually you get there. “I’ve studied a lot of ‘out’ classical music and the
thing is, you realize it is really hard to escape from a 1-4-5 mental-
ity,” says Roston. “Hopefully everything we do has some awesome
rock sound.”
It would actually probably all drift away if not for Jordyn Bonds,
whose talk/shout style of singing owes as much to Mary Weiss and
Bob Dylan as it does to Debbie Harry and Johnny Rotten (except
no rambling gambling epics or car crashes). Roston treads carefully
on summing up the main idea of Bonds’ lyrics for me: “Hmm. The
fact that humans can be very, very wonderful but instead we’re just
gonna kill ourselves.” So it’s love and death, happiness and pain.
Maybe not right out of the pages of Bad Company’s songbook, but
in the end, it’s rock & roll. “I trust the listener to be able to pick the
really simplistic structures out of the complexity,” says Roston. And
I would say with a sensory experience as intense as Big Bear, some
element of trust is key.

[Big Bear with Parts & Labor, Neptune and Thief Thief. Fri 12.12.08.
Middle East Upstairs, 472 Mass. Ave., Central Sq., Cambridge.
617.864.3278. 9pm/18+/$9. myspace.com/bigbear, mideastclub.com]

LOCAL PICK BOP BOP BOP

12
10
08 WANDAS | NEW WAVES BLUES
–
12
17
08 The four-piece group The Wandas separate
themselves from the large pack of Boston
WEEKLYDIG.C0M

pop bands with a tightly designed, smart

sound. Besides the production from Patrick
Krief (of The Dears) and the mastering of
Ryan Morey (The Stills, Arcade Fire), the
36 vocals from Keith McEachern and friends are
a delight. Check the matching harmonies of “Bending Over Back-
wards” or the fun falsetto on “Trepidation” for the ingredient that
truly adds to the already focused formula. Expect this Berklee-bred
band to do what many others have done: blow up. [DAVID DAY]
 table of contents
MUSIC | for advertising + listings info, listings@weeklydig.com

WEDNESDAY 12.10
Cafe 939 Soulcrate Music Band [10pm/21+]
Live Band Karaoke feat. [8pm/18+/$10] [9:30pm/free]

Letters
Downtown Fever Plough & Stars
[8pm/free] Hong Kong at Faneuil Middle East Upstairs Sara Leveque Duo
Hall This is how rumors get [10pm/21+]
Church Late Night Karaoke started, Sincerely, the

us
The Ting Tings [9pm/21+] Management, Sera Del Precinct

News + features
[8pm/21+/free] Fuego, Doug Orey The Rex Complex
Jacque’s [9pm/18+/$8 adv, [10pm/21+]
Fireplace Boyz Will Be Girlz, $9 dos]
Jazz Wednesdays w/ hosted by Melinda Ryles
Few knew that Earthsound Wilson, Mizery and Milky Way Anita Coelho Brazilian
Teddy was actually [9:30pm/21+] guests DJ Generoso’s Bovine Ensemble
born from a tree [10:30pm/21+/$6] Ska [9pm/21+] [9pm/$10]
Good Life Hot Salsa Wednesdays

commerce
vagina. Oranjuly,
Bassic w/ Pandai’a, Johnny D’s My House w/ DJ Rob Suave
12.10.08, at Steppo and guests Edit, Elliott Murphy, Jann Karaoke [8:30pm/18+/$10-
Great Scott. Ooah of Glitch Mob Klose [9pm/21+/free] $12]
[9pm/21+/$5] [8:30pm/21+/$12]
O’Brien’s Scullers

gift guide
All Asia
Great Scott Kells Born of Thunder, Act IV: A night of music
Johnny Nicholson’s
Oranjuly, No Casino, Get Over the Hump Finisher, Hot On The and musings feat.
Songwriter’s Circle
Shanghai Thrills, Tom Wednesdays w/ DJ Heels, Warhead Carol O’Shaughnessy,
[6pm]
Thumb Lay-Zee-Boy [9pm/21+/$6] Dane Vannatter,
Open Mic Hosted by

Eats + drinks
[9pm/18+/$9] [10pm/21+/free] Piero Bonamico, Lynda
Bryan Murphy of the Phoenix Landing D’Armour
Shills [9pm/21+] Harpers Ferry Middle East Corner Midweek Techno: [8pm/$28]
Mac Lethal w/ Grieves, Belly Dance w/ Live Sergio’s Bday Bash

thursday 12.11

dig this
Bar w/ VJ Tom Yaz Great Scott Middle East Corner Olivers @ Cask ‘n
[10pm/21+] Tyler’s Birthday Mish- Chelsea City Council Flagon

A + E
mash Band Hash feat. [10pm] Black River Sound, Soul
Burren members of Amoroso, Mafia, The Problemad-
Swinging Johnsons Animal Hospital, Big Middle East Down- dicts [8pm/21+]

Music
[8pm/21+] Bear, Clawjob, Ho-Ag, stairs
Ketman, Neptune, The The New Deal, Mocean Paradise Rock Club
Worker [8pm/18+/$22 Luke Bryan

movies
Cafe 939 Secret Sea, Tristan Da
The Dear Hunter, Cunha and more adv, $25 dos] [8pm/18+]
Person L. [9pm/18+/$8]
Middle East Upstairs Phoenix Landing

arts
[8pm/all ages/$13 adv,
Hong Kong at Faneuil Rhymezwell (CD Elements feat. Adam F.
$15 dos]
Hall release) feat. Ebb & [10pm/19+/$5]
Photographers

WORDS
Nonstop Karaoke Flow, Calvery Crew,
always appreciate Church Plough & Stars
[6pm/21+] Nox Beatz & Fat Ricky,
Conrad’s perfor- The Rationales, Dear- L.E.G. and more Scarce [10pm/21+]
DJ Dancing
mances in the born Valley, The Bees [9pm/18+/$10 adv,
[9pm/21+/free]

comedy
darkroom. Ratio- Knees, Preacher Jack $13 dos] Precinct
nales, 12.11.08, [8pm/21+/$8] Jacque’s Stuff @ Night Party,
Jacque’s Angels hosted Milky Way The Rex Complex
at Church.

Comics
Felt by Kris Knievil w/ Todo Mundo w/ DJ [10pm/21+]
True Music Thursdays Milinda Wilson and Lone Wolf
Alchemist Lounge w/ Beautiful Lies, Eric guests [9pm/21+/free] Redline
Forest Henderson Colville, Shadwell [11pm/21+/$6] Joe McMahon Trio

Classifieds
[10pm/21+/free] [9pm/21+/$8, free w/ My House [7pm/21+]
college ID] Johnny D’s International Thurs- Soul Clap [10pm/21+]
All Asia Samba Lolo [9pm/21+] days feat. Live Brazilian
Mightly Tighty Bands [8pm/21+/free] Ryles
Fireplace
[6:30pm] Kells Temporada Latina

ADULT
Latin Thursdays w/
TheMurder, The Lessar Thirsty Thursday O’Brien’s [8:30pm/21+/$8-$12]
Evils, Mouth Sewn Shut Alma [9:30/21+]
[10pm/21+] Mob Hit, Eyewitness
[9:30pm/21+] Scullers
selene angier

Death Count, Guilty

exit polls
Good Life Krisanthi Pappas and
Kitty O’Shea’s as Sin
An Tua Nua P.M.S. w/ Ms. Thang, Doug Hammer
Onset, DJs Artie V. and [9pm/21+/$6]
Night Gallery Video Just John [9pm/21+] [8pm/$18]
Greg G. [6pm/21+]
37
friday 12.12
Alchemist Lounge Bar w/ VJ Tom Yaz The Freeways, Black Presents The Gas
One Happy Island [10pm/21+] Mosettes [7pm/18+/$5]
[10pm/21+] [8pm/21+/$10] The Pill w/ DJs Ken &
Biltmore Grille Michael V
All Asia Karaoke w/ Dana Z Felt [9pm/21+/$5]
CNC Music Marathon [9pm] ‘80s Cover Bands,
w/ David Cousins, Mash-Up Fridays w/ Harpers Ferry
Zarni de Wet, The Burren DJ Rick Rude, Mash-up Corey Smith w/ Matt
Modern Elite, Road Moonshine [8pm/21+] Mafia [9pm/21+] Lowell [8pm/18+/$12
The roadie got an Apples, Secret Chan- adv, $15 dos]
nels, Johnny Duke and Cafe 939 Good Life
eyeful when he
The Aces Richard Saunders’s Seed in the City w/ DJ Hong Kong at Faneuil
popped up from a Urban Appeal, Julia
[6pm/21+ after Bradford James, Randy Hall
trap door by the Easterlin [8pm/$10] Deshaies w/ guest Happy Hour Karaoke
10pm/$6 for 21+, $9
speaker. Barnicle, for 18-20] Halo [9pm/21+/$5] [6pm-10pm/21+]
mick murray

12.12.08, at the Church DJ Dancing [9pm/21+]

Middle East Down- An Tua Nua The Dirty Truck- Great Scott
stairs. Night Gallery Video ers, Prime Movers, Anderson Comedy
more listings >> 38
 MUSIC | for advertising + listings info, listings@weeklydig.com

friday 12.12 FROM >> 37

Jacque’s [21+] My House [8pm/18+] bers, $20 guests]

Kris Knievil and the Live Music
cast of “Miss-Lead- Middle East Corner [8pm/21+/free] Phoenix Landing Ryles
ing Ladies:” Destiny, Angela Desveaux & Pretty Little Things w/ Jazzadelic
Mizery, Lakia Mondale, The Mighty Ship O’Brien’s DJ Vinny [9pm/$10]
Fena Barbitall Muck and the Mires, [10pm/21+/$5] Viernes des Vacilon
[10pm/21+/$10] Middle East Downstairs Topheavy, The Down- Latin Dance Party
Freezepop, Bon beat 5, The Buckners Precinct [8:30pm/18+/free
Johnny D’s Savants, The [9pm/21+/$8] Frank Graham, Kevin before 10pm, $5 after,
Memphis Rockabilly, Toothaches, Barnicle Connolly $10 after 11pm]
Girl Howdy [8pm/18+/$12] Olivers @ Cask ‘n [10:30pm/21+]
[9:45pm/21+] Flagon Scullers
Middle East Upstairs This Blue Heaven, The Redline Karrin Allyson
Kells Neptune, Parts & Honors, Common Thrill DJ KC Hallett of Soul [8pm, 10pm/$25]
Fridays Ladies Night Labor, Big Bear, Thief (CD release), The Mo- Revival [8pm/21+]
w/ DJ Grasshopper Thief [9pm/18+/$9] tion Sick
[10pm/21+/ladies free [8pm/21+] Rise
before 12am] Milky Way Orbit w/ Hearthrob:
The Final “The Wobble” Paradise Rock Club Red Foxx, Baltimoro-
Kitty O’Shea’s Friday Soul Party Sister Hazel w/ Benjy der, Morgan Louis and
Fusion Fridays w/ DJs [9pm/21+/free] Davis Project, Andrew Hush & Bons
Greg G. and Artie V. Hoover [2am/18+/$10 mem-

saturday 12.13
10pm/$6 for 21+, $9 Good Life w/ DJ Darren Drag O’Brien’s
for 18-20] Mister Jason w/ guests [10pm/21+] We’re All Gonna Die,
Ricky Powell, Rude-1 Hackman, The Under
An Tua Nua [9pm/21+/$5] Kitty O’Shea’s [9pm/21+/$8]
Uber Saturdays w/ DJ Plan B Saturdays w/ DJ
Susan Esthera Great Scott Greg G [21+] Phoenix Landing
[10pm/21+] Zozobra, Disppearer, Boom Boom Room w/
Night Gallery Video Gods and Queens, Middle East Corner DJ Vinny
Bar w/ VJ Tom Yaz Angels of Meth Po Boys Hammond B-3 [10pm/21+/$5]
Yeah, um, I’m [10pm/21+] [9pm/21+/$9] Organ Trio
Styles P. Welcome Plough & Stars
Biltmore Grille Harpers Ferry Middle East Down- Family Jewels
to my crib. So it’s stairs
Brian Burrill [9pm] Styles P [8pm/18+/$18 [4pm/21+]
a little messy. adv, $20 dos] The Viennagram, Death and Taxes
Shut up! Styles P, Burren Asleep in a Box, Aux, [10:30pm/21+]
12.13.08, at Spitting Vinnies Hong Kong at Faneuil Sizzlechest
Harpers Ferry. [8pm/21+] Hall [8pm/18+/$10] Precinct
Happy Hour Karaoke James Christensen,
Cafe 939 [5pm-9pm/21+] Middle East Upstairs Fancy Trash
Alchemist Lounge The Dear Hunter, 3 DJ Dancing Plus/Minus, Mean [9pm/21+]
Absinthe w/ The Amaz- [8pm/$13 adv, $15 [9pm/21+] Creek, Cotton Jones,
ing DJ Knife dos] Cotton Candy Redline
[10pm/21+] Jacque’s [9pm/18+/$10] DJ Inkognito
Church Kris Knievil and the [10pm/21+]
All Asia Logan 5 & The Runners, cast of “Miss-Lead- Milky Way
Wed 12/10 Alex Wright and the Weisstronauts, Sool, ing Ladies:” Destiny, Mango’s Latin Dance Rise
Wrongs My Own Worst Enemy, Mizery, Lakia Mondale, w/ DJ Baby Boricua Storm w/ Boris
PUB QUIZ 8-10
[12pm] The Mercy James Gang Fena Barbitall [9pm/21+/ladies free [1am/18+/$10 mem-
Boby Limijaya [8pm/21+/$10] [7:45pm, before 10:30pm, $5 bers, $20 guests]
Thur 12/11 [3pm]
Felt
10pm/21+/$10] before 11:30pm, $10]
Ryles
CNC Music Marathon
SWINGING
Enjoy our great JOHNSONS
w/ Mary Casiello, Merry Effen Christmas! Johnny D’s My House Samba Tremeterra
beer selection! Flaming Awesome, The Holiday Party w/ DJ Bronze Radio Return Dance: hip-hop, house, [9pm/$10]
Wrong Noises, The Pretty Boy Jones [9:45pm/21+] R&B, rock, mashups, Supershag
Effective Dose, Melanie [10pm/21+/ free w/ top 40 [9:15pm/18+/$15]
Fri 12/12 Driscoll, Mepos RSVP] Kells [8pm/21+/free]
MOONSHINE [6pm/21+ after Celebration Saturday

Sat 12/13 sunday 12.14

SPITTING VINNIES
All Asia Ton Parade Hong Kong at Faneuil It, Interrobang?!, Kill
Brandon Sheer [4pm] [8pm/21+/$7 adv, Hall Conrad
Sun 12/14 James Risolo Showcase $10 dos] Late Night Karaoke [1pm/all ages/$10]
Singer Songwriter [7pm] [9pm/21+] Grimis, Blastronauts,
12
Series with Great Scott Action Verbs, Plastic
DanielleM @ 8PM Biltmore Grille Jacque’s Reverie [9pm/18+/$8
10 Truth Serum w/ Dr.
08 Christie Leigh Bellany Work! w/ JujuBee and adv, $9 dos]
–
[9pm] Sketchy’s Anti-Art Destiny
12
School Cabaret Life
17
08 Mon 12/15 Burren Drawing Class
[21+/$6] Milky Way
Wreckage Talent Show
Set Dancing 8pm “Song for Dolphin Brunch Session w/ Johnny D’s
[2:30pm/18+/$7] [9pm/$8]
WEEKLYDIG.C0M

Children” is always Gannon Family All These Kings, Crans- Blues Jam
a room-clearer.
Tue 12/16 Bon Iver, 12.14.08,
[12pm/all ages]
Americano Session
ton Willow [4:30pm/21+] My House
Gay night w/ DJ Mike
Open Mic w/ at the Wilbur [7pm/21+]
[9pm/18+/free] Middle East Corner Giller [8pm/21+/free]
Hugh McGowan Theatre. Singer/Songwriter Belly Dance show w/
Harpers Ferry
@6:30 Series w/ Danielle DJ Garabed hosted by Phoenix Landing
[8pm/21+] The Ducky Boys w/ Far Sahar Rebound w/ Tanner
38 Alchemist Lounge From Finished, Pinker- [9pm/free] Ross and Jason B.
Jeremy Lyons and the Church ton Thugs, Morgan [10pm/19+/$5, free
247 Elm Street, Davis Sq. Somerville, MA Deltabilly Boys The Boston Babydolls, Knockers Middle East Upstairs before 11pm]
(617-776-6896) ::: www.burren.com [10pm/21+] Miss Tess & the Bon- [7pm/all ages/$10] Have Nots, Brunt Of
Open til 2am every Friday and Saturday
 table of contents
MUSIC | for advertising + listings info, listings@weeklydig.com
Upstairs
SUNDAY 12.14 Wed 12/10
Plough & Stars Precinct Rise Ryles Wilbur Theatre This is how rumors get started,
Frank Drake and the Sea Monsters Earth Jazz Brunch Bon Iver Sincerely the Management,

Letters
Aristocrats [5pm/21+] [10pm/21+] [2am/18+/$10 mem- [10am-3pm] [8pm/$21.50] Doug Orey $8adv/$9dos
Frank Morey Band bers, $20 guests] Salsa Sundays
[9pm/21+] [6pm/18+/$10] thu 12/11
Leedz Edutainment presents

us
Rhymezwell CD Release Party
monday 12.15

News + features
featuring Ebb & Flow,
Calvery Crew, Nox Beatz &
Thistles [6pm] Harpers Ferry Building’s On Fire, Alive Voyager 01 and DJ Fat Ricky, L.E.G. and more
DJ Natan vs. DJ V-Nice Radio Fix w/ Antique and Awake Uppercut
$10adv$13dos
[9pm/21+] Scream [8pm/18+] [8pm/18+/ $8] [10pm/21+/$5]

Biltmore Grille Hong Kong at Faneuil My House Plough & Stars

Fri 12/12
Neptune, Parts & Labor,

commerce
Mark Purcell Hall Live Jazz and Open Kepi Acoustic w/ DJ
[9pm] Triviaoke [10pm-12am] Jazz Jam w/ Renato Ryan the Terrible Big Bear, Thief Thief $9
Dude, quit playing Karaoke [12am/21+] Malavasi and Friends [10pm/21+/$3]
Burren [8pm/21+/free] sat 12/13
peek-a-boo through
Set Dancing w/ Ger Jacque’s Precinct +/- (a.ka. Plus/Minus,

gift guide
my hair. It’s so Cooney Jaded Lounge hosted O’Brien’s The Mike Hastings Absolutely Kosher Records)
not metal. [8pm/21+] by Becca D’Bus Razormaze, Unholy Band [10pm/21+] with Mean Creek, Cotton
Razormaze, 12.15.08, [10pm/21+/$6] Goatfucker, Spewtila- Jones $10
at O’Brien’s. Great Scott tor, Boarcorpse, Ill Scullers
Otis Grove, Missing Middle East Upstairs Daemonium Melissa Morgan sun 12/14 Matinee

Eats + drinks
All Asia Traces (farewell show), Another Polk Christ- [9pm/21+/$8] [8pm/$18]
Brick by Brick Productions
Sam Reid and the Riot Rex Comlex mas Party w/ The
rev aaron

[9pm/18+/$8] Antlers, Gypsy Cab, The Phoenix Landing presents

Act, Poverty Line Old
Time Band, The Tin Beasts of England, This Makka Mondays w/ Have Nots, Brunt Of It,
Interrobang?!,
Kill Conrad All Ages $10

dig this
tuesday 12.16 NOTE: 1pm Doors
McGowan Hong Kong at Faneuil My House Plough & Stars sun 12/14 Night show

A + E
[6:30pm/21+] Hall Open Mic night w/ Kaitlin Dibble w/
Grimis, Blastronauts, Action
Late Night Karaoke Bobbielee and Friends Michala
Cafe 939 [9pm/21+] [10pm/21+] Verbs, Plastic Reverie
[8pm/21+/free]

Music
Poetry Slam feat. Regie $8adv/$9dos
Gibson [8pm/$5] Jacque’s O’Brien’s Precinct
Karaoke Hosted by Not Art Collaborative Mon 12/15

movies
School for Robots; Left
Church Mizery
Hand Does; Sincerely,
[10pm/21+] Polk Records presents
Pray for Mojo, Mighty [21+/$6] Another Polk Christmas Party
Tiny, Andrew Lewis The Management Ryles
Seen here headlin- with The Antlers, Gypsy Cab,

arts
[8pm/21+/$5] Johnny D’s [9pm/21+/$8] Artist Showcase, Multi-
ing at Backyard-a- The Beasts of England,
palooza ’07. New York Songwriters Band Event
Good Life Circle Paradise Rock Club [8:30pm/$8] This Building’s On Fire,

WORDS
Bobbielee, 12.16.08, Tuesday Night Ten out of Tenn Christ- Alive and Awake $8
[8:30pm/21+] Noche Latina Tuesdays
at My House. Squabble [8pm/21+] mas Tour feat. Griffin [7pm/18+/$10-$13] NOTE: 8pm Doors
Middle East Corner House, Katie Herzig,

comedy
All Asia Great Scott The Sneaks Trent Dabbs, Tyler Scullers tue 12/16
Karmic Songwriters Ice Cream Social w/ James, Jeremy Lister, David Benoit’s The Living Sea, The Mystery
Circle [6:30pm] Chris Devlin, E-Marce Middle East Upstairs “A Charlie Brown
Butterfly Boucher, Tramps, Loud Clappers $8
Dylan Galvin & Friends [9pm/18+/$8] The Living Sea, The Christmas” w/ Boston

Comics
KS Rhoads, Matthew
[9:30pm/21+] Mystery Tramps, Loud City Singers Choir
Harpers Ferry Clappers, Motorcar
Perryman Jones, Andy Wed 12/17
[8pm, 10pm/$28]
Burren Indie Rock Parade [9pm/18+/$8]
Davis, Erin Mccarley Sparky’s Flaw

Classifieds
Open Mic w/ Hugh [8pm/18+] [7pm/18+] (Mercury Records, fr. VA),
Sunset is a Battle,
Soap Stars $9
WednesdAy 12.17
DoWNstairs

ADULT
Biltmore Grille Old War, The Morning Middle East Down- Roadsteamer, Chris
Karaoke w/ Dana Z Light, Michelle Darosa stairs Coxen, The Ander- thu 12/11
[9pm] [7pm/all ages/$10 adv, Taproot, Silent Season, son Comedy Group, MassConcerts presents The

exit polls
$12 dos] Resin [8pm/18+/$15] Mehran, Bethany Van New Deal, Mocean Worker
Church Delft and Campaign
Ralph Eats Dynamite, Hong Kong at Faneuil Middle East Upstairs for Realtime
$22adv/$25dos
Red Quiet, Thick as Hall Sparky’s Flaw, Slow [7pm/18+]
Thieves, The Darker Late Night Karaoke Motion Driver, Soap Fri 12/12 39
Hues [8pm/21+/$8] [9pm/21+] Stars [9pm/18+/$9] Phoenix Landing Freezepop,
Midweek Techno: Justin Bon Savants,
You don’t want to Fireplace Jacque’s Milky Way Carr [10pm/21+] The Toothaches,
know what Kathy Kathy Olson Boyz Will Be Girlz, Soulkore’s Stardust Barnicle $12
[9:30pm/21+] hosted by Melinda Open Stage Plough & Stars
learned in band
camp. Kathy Olson,
Wilson, Mizery and [2pm/21+/$5] Poverty Line Old Time sat 12/13
Good Life guests Band [10pm/21+]
12.17.08, at Dancehall Xmas style My House Team Shred presents
[10:30pm/21+/$6]
Fireplace. w/ Kotek, Damian Silva Karaoke Precinct The Viennagram,
w/ guest DJ Brynmore Johnny D’s [9pm/21+/free] The Rex Complex Asleep in a Box,
Alchemist Lounge
[9pm/21+] Zagnutt [10pm/21+] Aux, Sizzlechest $10
[8:30pm/21+] O’Brien’s
The Speakeasys
[10pm/21+]
Great Scott Escape The Basement, Ryles Wed 12/17
The Broken River Kells The Susan Constant Hiro Honshuku and A- MassConcerts presents
Prophet, Quincunx, Get Over the Hump [9pm/21+/$7] NO-NE Christmas Taproot, Silent Season, Resin
All Asia
Shepherdess, Ghost Wednesdays [9pm/$10]
Johnny Nicholson’s Paradise Rock Club-
Box Orchestra [10pm/21+/free] Hot Salsa Wednesdays
Songwriter’s Circle [6pm] Greater Boston Alter-
[9pm/18+/$7] w/ DJ Rob Suave
Open Mic Hosted by Middle East Corner native Comedy Festival [8:30pm/$10-$12]
Bryan Murphy of the Harpers Ferry Belly Dance w/ Live feat. Shane Mauss, The
Shills [9pm/21+] Ace Enders w/ Good Band [9:30pm/free] Walsh Brothers, Robby
 CD reviewS
From the department of the inevitable: “We are proud to announce that Tiësto has teamed up with
the game developer Activision and their latest project DJ Hero … ‘This is a great way to introduce
people into DJing,’” says Tiësto, “‘Maybe they realize it’s not as easy as they think.’” Dude, shut up.
LADYHAWKE | S/T
GENRE | PERFECT-WORLD POP
VERDICT | THE ANTI-BRIT
RELEASE | 12.9.08
LABEL | MODULAR
INTERSCOPE
LADYHAWKEMUSIC.COM
Any music critic or magazine who already submit-
ted their best of 2008 is going to have egg on their
collective face in the years to come. There’s little
doubt this debut from New Zealand’s Phillipa “Pip”
Brown will go down as one of the best releases of
2008. It’s not simply her reinvention of ’80s “happy
sad” pop, and it’s not her sexy Stevie Nicks style.
It’s not the hipster drawl or the innumerable qual-
ity remixes. It’s the songwriting. While the ass-end
of US culture gobbles up Britney repeating “Wom-
anizer” 700 times, Brown is writing arena-worthy
anthems and legitimate songs. I am sure the office
is sick to death of me playing “My Delirium,” but I,
for one, can’t get enough of it. As each verse passes
by, the wait for the brilliant chorus seems to get
longer. The video is the shit, too. All 12 songs are
like that. An excellent album. [DAVID DAY]
PAVEMENT | BRIGHTEN THE CORNERS: NICENE
CREEDENCE EDITION
GENRE | HIPPIE ROCK
VERDICT | SLACKENED FURTHER
RELEASE | 12.9.08
LABEL | MATADOR RECORDS
MATADORRECORDS.COM/
PAVEMENT
As a tremendous Pavement fan in college, I practi-
cally became a deadhead (asphalt-face?) when I
followed them on a short Midwestern tour, and I
am all for supporting indie labels like Matador. But
after buying the deluxe Wowee Zowee, I’m starting
to tire of this nostalgia trip. “Transport Is Arranged”
sounds better than ever, but hearing unreleased
songs just feels like a waste and is even effecting
my once-pristine devotion to these NoCal boys.
Leave them unreleased much? [DAVID DAY]
BRITNEY SPEARS | CIRCUS
GENRE | POP AND GAG
12
10 VERDICT | STOP, PLEASE STOP
08
– RELEASE | 11.2.08
12
17 LABEL | JIVE
08
BRITNEYSPEARS.COM
WEEKLYDIG.C0M
More from the fish about her fishbowl. The themes
are tired and the melodies are snoring. And lyrics?
“I don’t care / I don’t care / I don’t care / I don’t
40
care.” I feel sorry for people who think this is good.
[DEBBIE DRISCOLL]
FENNESZ | BLACK SEA
GENRE | STATIC SOUND
VERDICT | LIVING MUSIC
RELEASE | 11.24.08
LABEL | TOUCH
FENNESZ.COM
For ravers, “chill out” music is what you play after
you’ve stayed up all night, the sun is rising and
whatever drugs you’ve ingested are wearing off.
The idea is that ambient music is like a cleansing
mechanism, an aural Q-Tip to squeegee out what-
ever pulsing beat remnants are still glomming onto
your inner ear. Fennesz is like that, but the drugs are
of the everyday variety (caffeine, say) and the beat
is the regular detritus that fills our craniums as we
walk through the day. “The Colour of Three” sounds
like a harmonium from the planet Pluto, while the
melody you can hear through the static wall of
“Glide” (as played by drone cohort Rosy Parlane)
sounds like heaven. Christian Fennesz, of Austria, is
a modern composer like none other. Whether it’s
his masterpiece Endless Summer or “Vacuum” here,
he has the ability to make the celestial our own.
[ADA HUTCHINSON]
FREE BLOOD | THE SINGLES
GENRE | WEIRDO BEARDO
VERDICT | DOWNLOAD THIS
RELEASE | 11.11.08
LABEL | RONG MUSIC
FREEBLOODMUSIC.COM
The usually reliable DFA Records teams up with
the hit-or-miss slow-brow disco label Rong Music
and the results are just as mixed. I’m not sure who
would take to the lead single “Never Hear Surf Mu-
sic Again,” or its odd Barfly Mix, but I do know re-
edit king Greg Wilson can make any track hum like
a newly tuned Aston Martin. He turns the strange,
clattering “Grumpy” into a smooth dancefloor
machine. [ADA HUTCHINSON]
ZURMUS ZUNZUN
MELISSA ETHERIDGE | A NEW THOUGHT FOR CHRISTMAS
GENRE | ATHEIST SPIRITUALS
VERDICT | YULETIDE GHEY
RELEASE | 9.30.08
LABEL | ISLAND
MELISSAETHERIDGE.COM
When Etheridge’s growl barrels into
“Christmas (Baby Please Come
Home)” and she takes in that
sexy, clenched inhale, it gives me
the shudders. [DEBBIE DRISCOLL]
 exit polls ADULT Classifieds Comics comedy WORDS arts movies Music A + E dig this Eats + drinks gift guide commerce News + features us Letters table of contents
41
12
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08
–
12
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WEEKLYDIG.C0M

42

DOUBT
Award-winning play turns to movie mush
review BY DAVID WILDMAN | wildman@weeklydig.com
f I were clever, I’d write an entire
review of this film that left you
wondering what my true opinion
of it was. Doubt is supposed to be
about just that—not knowing if an
accused priest is diddling one of his altar
boys, and using that to question orga-
nized religion. The play is known for its
even-handedness, but the film unsubtly
games the outcome.
It’s hard to imagine going wrong
with Philip Seymour Hoffman and
Meryl Streep, two of the most deservedly
decorated thespians in the biz. Hoffman
plays Father Brendan Flynn, a priest with
a lively sense of humor and intensity for
living who, in a sign of the times, finds
himself breaking away from the stodgy
Catholic mindset. Streep is Sister Aloysius
Beauvier, a brutal disciplinarian nun with
a Brooklyn accent who, as school principal,
is chief enforcer of the status quo. All that
screenwriter/playwright/director John
Patrick Shanley really had to do was hand
them his script, set up a camera and get
his ass out of their way. Shanley, however,
seems ultimately incapable of doing that.
table of contents
Letters
us
News + features
commerce
The opening scenes set the table,
taking us behind the curtain of an aver-
gift guide
age Sunday service, starting with a child
waking up and hurrying to the church for
his altar boy duties. The camera gradu-
Eats + drinks
ally takes in a number of viewpoints,
cutting between churchgoers chatting
as they head down the city streets, and
Flynn, preparing to give his sermon. As
the reverend speaks about doubt and
dig this
freedom of dissent, Sister Aloysius polices
the pews, striking terror into the hearts
A + E
of snoozing tykes. Shanley smoothly
contrasts the sound and the visuals, using
Music
a handheld cam for Streep and a static
shot of Hoffman, constantly switching the
movies
two viewpoints as the sermon continues,
emphasizing the divide between the main
protagonists that will become the center-
arts
piece of the film. As long as the tone is subtle, Doubt NAMBLing the only black kid in school.
works. Shanley does 1964 so well, with A taut meeting ensues in Sister Aloy-
WORDS
Amy Adams enters as Sister James, one
of the teaching nuns, looking effectively such perfectly realized clothes, cars and sius’ office, and Shanley drives home his
down-to-earth (and far from Enchanted). details like transistor radios and authen- characters’ emotional states by tilting
comedy
As the kids line up outside the school, one tic telephones, you almost believe the the camera to the side, à la the Batman
of them is singled out by Aloysius, and film was actually shot back then. But as TV series. Bad move. It undercuts the
Flynn remarks to Sister James: “The dragon the plot kicks in, Shanley’s creditability slow-motion fireworks going on between
Comics
is hungry,” hinting of the conflict to come. erodes. Sister James accuses Flynn of the actors. Sister Aloysius talks to the
kid’s mother (Viola Davis), and we find
Classifieds
out he’s gay and his father beats him. We
also find out that when she cries, a line
of mucous drops out of her nose toward
her mouth, and Shanley features it in
ADULT
bracing close-ups.
In the end, this delicate web is woven
exit polls
for naught, as Shanley’s heavy editorializ-
ing makes us certain of what happened,
I’m afraid this instead of keeping the outcome up in
isn’t the Robert the air, leaving me to doubt whether 43
Downey Jr. movie
trailer in Tropic Shanley should have ever directed his
Thunder. own screenplay.
DOUBT
RATED | PG-13
OPENS | 12.12.08
 CADILLAC RECORDS theater directory

A meaningful, musical biopic AMC Chestnut Hill T service: Coolidge

27 Boylston St., Corner (Green Line C
Chestnut Hill Branch), Harvard Ave.
REVIEW BY HARRY VAUGHN You were right, Godzilla 617.277.2500 (Green Line B Branch);
doesn’t have any balls. Screens: 5 Bus Route 66]
[Prices: $9.25 GA;
$8.25 students; $7.25 Entertainment
Music biopic standards have been low- seniors & matinees; Cinemas Fresh Pond
$6.25 children. 168 Alewife Brook
ered in recent years due to the success of CADILLAC RECORDS Nearby T service: Parkway, Cambridge
both Ray and Walk the Line, two prestige- RATED | R Chestnut Hill (Green 617.661.2900
oriented studio films. Coated with family NOW SHOWING | AMC LOEWS Line D Branch); Bus Screens: 5
Routes 60, 51] [Prices: $8.75 GA;
values and crowd-pleasing rhythms, both BOSTON COMMON, REGAL
$5.75 seniors, children
movies use star power and loose truths FENWAY 13, KENDALL SQUARE AMC Loews Boston & matinees. Nearby
to broadly categorize the music, the prob- CINEMA, AMC BRAINTREE Common T service: Alewife
175 Tremont St., Bos- Station (Red Line); Bus
lems and the personas within. They may ton 617.423.5801 Route 83]
be entertaining, but they never developed Screens: 12
[Prices: $10 GA; $9
into something of lasting insight. students; $8 seniors
Harvard Film Archive
24 Quincy St., Har-
It’s a relief that Cadillac Records, by & matinees; $7 vard University, Cam-
little-known film director Darnell Martin, Shot with an unassuming attention her narration jumps too fast at too many
children. Nearby T ser- bridge 617.495.4700
vice: Boylston (Green
manages to break those constraints. In to detail, Records doesn’t feel like a history pivotal moments, leaving significant plot Line, Silver Line), Park
Screens: 1
[Prices: $8 GA; $6
Records, the lives of Muddy Waters (Jeffrey lesson as much as it does an immersion. lines—like Etta James’ drug addiction—
Street (Green Line, seniors & students.
Red Line), Chinatown
Wright), Little Walter (Columbus Short), Martin’s approach is deeply authentic and unexplored and incomplete. (Orange Line, Silver
Nearby T service: Har-
Willie Dixon (Cedric the Entertainer), vard Station (Red Line);
her ensemble of actors—each of whom The overall craft, however, trumps any Line); Bus Route 43]
Bus Routes 1, 69, 86]
Chuck Berry (Mos Def) and Etta James envelop themselves into the bodies and narrative flaws. Unlike Ray and Walk the AMC Loews Harvard
(Beyoncé Knowles) are told from the souls of their characters—lends the film a Line, the film sits with its characters and Square
Kendall Square
Cinema
perspective of Leonard Chess (Adrien piercing sense of drama. their lives through the angry, heartbreak-
10 Church St., Cam-
1 Kendall Sq., Cam-
bridge 617.864.4580
Brody), a small-town producer who, in The structure of the story is what ing and joyful riffs of their music. This is Screens: 5 bridge 617.499.1996
1947 along with his brother, created the hurts the production the most. Martin what music biopics are supposed to do, [Prices: $9.25 GA; Screens: 9
[Prices: $9.25 GA; $7
famous Chess Records studio in the South elicits excellent turns from her cast, (espe- and it is in this essential vein that Cadillac
$8.25 students; $7.25
seniors, children &
seniors & matinees;
Side of Chicago. cially Wright, Mos Def and Knowles), but Records succeeds. $6.25 children. matinees. Nearby T
Nearby T service: service: Kendall Sta-
Harvard Station (Red tion (Red Line)]
Line); Bus Routes 1,
71-75, 77-78, 96] Museum of Fine Arts
465 Huntington Ave.,
A movie about the only people that Boston 617.369.3907
Brattle Theatre
can make comic book geeks cool. 40 Brattle St., Cam- Screens: 1
bridge 617.876.6837 [Prices: $9 GA; $8
Screens: 1 seniors, children, &
[Prices: $9.50 GA; students; $7 matinees
HELVETICA $7.50 students & for GA; $6 matinees
SATURDAY 12.13.08 matinees; $6.50 for seniors, children
seniors & children. & students. Nearby T
RABB LECTURE HALL Nearby T service: service: MFA (Green
BOSTON PUBLIC LIBRARY Harvard Station (Red Line E Branch); Bus
700 BOYLSTON ST., BOSTON Line); Bus Routes 1, Routes 39, 47]
2PM/FREE 66, 71, 73, 86]
Regal Fenway
RSVP: PROGRAMS@USAHOSTELS.ORG Capitol Theatre Stadium
BPL.ORG 204 Mass. Ave., Arling- 201 Brookline Ave.,
HELVECTICAFILM.COM ton 781.648.4340 Boston 617.424.6111
Screens: 6 Screens: 13
[Prices: $7 GA; $6.50 [Prices: $10 GA; $8
Helvetica students; $5 children
before 6pm, seniors
students & matinees;
$7.75 seniors; $7 chil-
& matinees. Nearby dren. Nearby T service:
Free documentary screening demonstrates the power of font T service: Bus Routes
77, 87, 350]
Kenmore (Green Line),
Fenway (Green Line D
Branch); Bus Routes 8,
Circle Cinemas 60, 65, 47]
REVIEW By Carrigan Denny-Brown 399 Chestnut Hill Ave.,
Brookline 617.566.4040 Showcase Cinemas
Screens: 7 Revere
[Prices: $9.75 GA; 565 Squire Rd., Revere
Stare at that American Apparel ad a little way we think, act and organize ourselves. and typographers as Neville Brody and $7.25 seniors, children 781.286.1660
longer—no, not at those, look at the font. And as much as the words themselves are Michael Bierut describe their art form & matinees. Nearby Screens: 20
T service: Reservoir [Prices: $10 GA; $7.25
12
10
It’s Helvetica, a typeface that is bold, important, the medium by which we are and the power of a single font. And even (Green Line D Branch), seniors, children &
08
– precise, and, like the babe in the ad, it’s on told where we are and where we should the tasteless heathens will appreciate the Cleveland Circle matinees. Nearby T
(Green Line C Branch),
every street corner. However, the story of aspire to go is our silent negotiator. excellent cinematography and soundtrack,
12
17 service: Bus Routes 119,
Chestnut Hill Ave.
08 411, 426, 428-429]
Helvetica and how it came to be so “used” Given that Helvetica is the font we most which includes Caribou, El Ten Eleven and (Green Line B Branch);
isn’t what you think; in fact, it’s a story see on our street signs, advertisements Motohiro Nakashima. In photo-like, single Bus Routes 51, 86]
WEEKLYDIG.C0M

Somerville Theatre
about the tides of war, radical idealism and corporate slogans, it’s no wonder shots, we see text in a new way—through Coolidge Corner 55 Davis Sq., Somer-
ville 617.625.5700
and the neutral Swiss. that Helvetica has raised controversy, a designer’s expert lens, as it’s slathered on Theatre
Screens: 5
290 Harvard St.,
In the documentary film Helvetica, the being labeled by some as the typeface of signs, walls and windows in over 50 cities Brookline 617.734.2500 [Prices: $7 GA; $6.50
origins and motivations of the promiscu- capitalism, and by others as the typeface worldwide. Ambient music plays and the Screens: 4 students; $5 children
before 6pm, seniors
44 ous font are brought to light, and I prom- of socialism. skeptical viewer is mysteriously convinced [Prices: $9.50 GA; $7.50
& matinees. Nearby T
seniors & children
ise, you have never heard design geeks Being somewhat of a font nerd myself, by the sensitivities of the distances be- (Fri-Sun); $6.50 seniors service: Davis Station
speak so lustily about anything. Design is I was truly moved by the poetic and tween letters. & children (Mon-Thu); (Red Line); Bus Routes
$6 members; $7.50 87, 88, 90, 94, 96]
a universal language that influences the inspiring way that such famous designers Helvetica speaks. matinees. Nearby

DIG THAT | HOLIDAY SHOPPING EDITION!
[dvd] DIGGING FOR DIRT: THE LIFE AND DEATH OF ODB | JAMIE LOWE
FOR THE HIP-HOP FABER & FABER | $25
FOR YOUR SISTER
HEAD As hip-hop stars go, shit, as anything anywhere ever goes, Ol’ Dirty
Bastard was one of a kind. Up until now, a categorical biography
of the amazing MC was missing from my bookshelf. I’m happy to
say Jamie Lowe, a New York writer with a litany of articles, has
firmly stuck the landing with this one. From Wu-Tang MCs to ODB’s
parental units, as well as managers and friends, Lowe justly weaves
a convoluted web of race, mental illness and, of course, the MC’s
agile ability to turn a phrase into a catchphrase. With more innate
knowledge than even I expected, Russell Jones (or “Rusty,” to his
moms) survives as both an enigma and legend, and Lowe’s heartfelt
tome wraps it all up with dexterous diligence. [BRENT T. INGRAM]
MR. BEAN | THE ULTIMATE COLLECTION
[dvd]
FOR THE BRIT A&E HOME VIDEO | $69.95
COMEDY LOVER Never mind the queen, God save the Bean! A neatly dressed yet an-
noyingly awkward character, Mr. Bean’s antics always manage to find
some way to gracefully (or gracelessly) win me over. Easily one of my
favorite Brits—sandwiched between Beckham and Craig—Atkinson’s
brainchild has become an iconic figure in British comedy while creat-
ing an international cult following. Just in time for the holidays, Mr.
Bean: The Ultimate Collection is a seven-disc box set complete with
the entire Mr. Bean TV series, Bean: The Movie, Mr. Bean’s Holiday
and Mr. Bean: The Animated Series. If this isn’t enough (and for fans it
never, ever is), we’re treated to deleted scenes, a mind-blowing music
video and glimpses into what it took to create such brilliance. With
hours of fun, you too can live the Bean. [JENNIFER CHOI]
[book] POP SURF CULTURE | BY BRIAN CHIDESTER AND DOMENIC PRIORE
FOR THE SANTA MONICA PRESS | $39.95
PARTYING POPS Dads with too-large record collections will recognize Domenic
Priore as the man who compiled Look! Listen! Vibrate! SMiLE!, the
FOR THE WESTERN-
first scholarly text dedicated to the mysteries of The Beach Boys’
OBSESSED, VULGAR
lost album. Priore and co-author Brian Chidester have amassed their
knowledge into a book that traces not only surfing itself but also it’s
metaphor for the Beats, a movement that eventually represented
’60s counterculture. Pop Surf Culture is both coffee table book and
textbook, with a stunning collection of rare relics and photographs.
Sixties pop obsessives will be rewarded with more than enough
connections and recommendations to make the book pay for itself
(did you know that before Deep Throat, Carol Connors was a surf
rock queen?). Film fans will likewise find a favorable assessment of
the beach movie genre. With plenty of history and eye candy, Pop
Surf Culture wins. [JONATHAN DONALDSON]
[video game] PREPAID GIFT CARDS | WII POINTS, MICROSOFT POINTS OR
FOR ANY GAMER PLAYSTATION NETWORK
NINTENDO, MICROSOFT, SONY | VARIOUS PRICES
AT ALL
Not sure what to get that grubby, Cheetos-encrusted gamer?
How about prepaid gift cards? Some of the best games of 2008
aren’t available in stores, but distributed digitally and download-
able straight to the console, including top titles like World of Goo
on the Wii, Braid and Geometry Wars II for the 360, and PixelJunk
Eden for the PS3. All it takes is an internet connection and a credit
card, or one of these gift cards. With a Wii Point card, your gamer
buddy can download new WiiWare games or classics through the
Virtual Console. Microsoft Points and PlayStation Network cards
can pay for not just new games, but additional content for disc-
based standards. Or get them a few crates of Mountain Dew from
Sam’s Club instead. [GARRET MARTIN]
table of contents
I LIVE HERE | BY MIA KIRSHNER, J.B. MACKINNON, PAUL SHOEBRIDGE
[book]
AND MICHAEL SIMONS
PANTHEON | $29.95
This elegant and well-designed documentary book is in fact four
Letters
books in one. Although the inclusion of Mia Kirschner as author
undoubtedly grabbed everyone’s attention, they were all pleasantly
us
surprised, from the Village Voice on down to Elle. Thanks to her
impassioned writing, and her design of AdBusters’ own Simons and
News + features
Shoebridge, we’re clearly informed of differentiating plights from
around the world. In one book, we are taken to a Chechen refugee
camp in Ingushetia, Russia; another transports us to the ethnic
cleansing in Burma. The effects of globalization in Mexico and AIDS
in Malawi round out this upsetting travelogue. Herself a granddaugh-
commerce
ter of the Holocaust, Kirschner would seize the imagination of any
young mind, her rowr-inducing appearances in the L Word, Exotica
and others notwithstanding. [ADA HITCHINSON]
gift guide
[video game] NINJATOWN | SOUTHPEAK INTERACTIVE
FOR THE NINTENDO DS | $29.99
Eats + drinks
DS-ADLLED In the ’80s, young Americans had a bloodlust for all things ninja.
I’ve always hated the damn things, though. I didn’t expect much
out of Ninjatown, then, which looked like a rip-off of Desktop
Tower Defense propped up with tired ninja jokes. But Ninjatown’s
dig this
actually pretty awesome—an adorable and genuinely funny game
for all ages. The ninjas of Ninjatown are like Smurfs, little critters
protected by a white-whiskered patriarch called Ol’ Master Ninja.
A + E
Through him, players oversee the defense of Ninjatown from
invading demons by building various fortifications. Like most tower
Music
defense games, Ninjatown is more about strategy, although there
are a few special powers that make use of the DS touch-screen
movies
and microphone. Difficulty escalates nicely, and levels continually
introduce new game-play mechanics, perfect for both seasoned
and occasional gamers. [GARRETT MARTIN]
arts
WORDS
[dvd] DEADWOOD | THE COMPLETE SERIES
HBO VIDEO | $179.97
comedy
With the look of Tombstone, the dramatic ambitions of Shake-
GRAMPS speare (no joke—the dialogue segues in and out of iambic pentam-
eter) and more fucks per minute than a season of The Osbournes,
Comics
Deadwood comes at you like a finely tooled boot to the face.
Although something of an anomaly, Deadwood reinvented how
Classifieds
the drama of the American West could be done and showed that
everything’s better when you can be profane and profound. With
23 discs in all, Deadwood is ready to kick the ass of any other show
you have on the DVD shelf. Much like rye whiskey, the show might
ADULT
be a little harsh at first, but if you just keep at it, you find some-
thing that ultimately reveals itself as rich and complex. “Merry
exit polls
motherfucking Christmas, cocksucker.” [JARROD ANNIS]
45
LITTLE HOUSE ON THE PRAIRIE | THE COMPLETE TELEVISION SERIES
[dvd]
LIONS GATE | $279.98
FOR MY MOM
The look on my mom’s face is easily worth the cashola one would
spend on this overwhelmingly complete version of the most whole-
some TV show of all time. In the ’70s, a decade of debauchery,
sexual revolution and key parties, Laura Ingalls Wilder’s wholesome
time-machine transported my dear mother once a week to an era
when the unknown American frontier depended on religious myth to
maintain order (Michael Landon was probably a sex god, too). Plus,
with the election of Barack Obama, she’ll now have something else
to watch besides the bilious Fox News Channel. All nine seasons are
here, as are the three made-for-TV movies and seven-plus hours
of bonus material. I won’t even mind spending the rest of the day
showing her how to work the DVD player. I can already hear her
exclaim: “Good gracious!” [DAVID DAY]
 a+e 826 ART AUCTION
Drawing inspiration from kids, for a cause

PREVIEW BY NISHA MAXWELL

DAVID WAIN

Stella partner and comedy director bros down
INTERVIEW BY ROB TURBOVSKY
David Wain may be less recognizable
than his unflappably ironic Stella troupe-
mates Michael Showalter and Michael
Ian Black, but he’s no less prolific. The
creator of MyDamnChannel.com’s Wainy
Days and co-writer/director of cult favor-
ites present (Wet Hot American Summer)
“T
STELLA
WITH EUGENE MIRMAN
THURSDAY 12.11.08
WILBUR THEATRE
246 TREMONT ST., BOSTON
617.931.2000
7:30PM/ALL AGES/$29.50
THEWILBURTHEATRE.COM
STELLACOMEDY.COM
done that differently and shit, I wish I
could go back. But, from that point on,
whenever I see it, I can just enjoy it. I’m
always like, “Oh, wow, that was awesome.”
That’s interesting, because someone
like Woody Allen famously never
igers come from Bangladesh, 826 BOSTON’S ART AUCTION
Siberia, Iran, Afghanistan, FRIDAY 12.12.08
China, India and Indiana. All of ROBERT KLEIN GALLERY
the tigers weigh 660 pounds. […] They 38 NEWBURY ST., BOSTON
can each eat your head,” writes 9-year- 617.442.5400
old Anthony Mejia. He is one of three 826 6PM/FREE
Boston students whose writing is being ROBERTKLEINGALLERY.COM
artistically interpreted by over 50 artists 826BOSTON.ORG
for an upcoming auction to benefit
826 Boston. For those in the dark,
826 Boston is the seventh branch of
826 National, a nonprofit founded
by McSweeney’s editor Dave Eggers.
Based in Egleston Square, Roxbury,
they work to support and enrich the
Boston education system by inspiring
kids to write—and write creatively.
They provide a selection of free
programs for urban youth, ages 6-18,
including daily drop-in tutoring, in-
classroom collaboration with Boston
teachers, volunteer-guided writ-
ing workshops and field trips. “The
goal,” says executive director Daniel
Johnson, “is to get them really excited
about reading and writing.”
Every 826 location is embedded in
a wacky storefront: The Boring Store
in Chicago, Seattle’s Space Travel Sup-

and future (The Ten, Role Models), Wain
brings laughter to the masses with
Black and Showalter (joined by Eugene
Mirman in Boston) for a brief tour.
In his stand-up, Showalter reads the
New York Times’ strangely personal
negative review of Stella. Did those
kinds of reactions confuse you?
We definitely got some of those hostile-
type reviews. Wet Hot, The State, The
Ten and Stella all got a lot of “You’ve
personally offended this critic, and I’m
angry at you guys for being so unfunny.”
It’s particularly dumbfounding for us,
because we really thought we were just
doing comedy. Some people are not inter-
ested in seeing what a lot of our comedy
is, which is sort of profoundly, purposely
12
10
08
unfunny. For some reason, we elicit true,
–
12 genuine hostility among some critics,
17
08 and then the other half of the critics are
praising it as funny, groundbreaking
WEEKLYDIG.C0M
re-watches his old movies.
To some degree, I understand that, because
you get so sick of it, and then you’re done
with it and you can’t change it. I just saw
Wet Hot for the first time in many, many
years at a screening in Los Angeles, and
I have to say I loved it. To be separated
from all of the headaches and sweat you
went through—in Wet Hot’s case, for four
years—and to be able to see it as not just a
movie but a movie that came through your
brain and soul—it’s a great experience.
Stella did an Obama benefit show.
Is there anything in his victory that
you’d like to take credit for?
New York and Pennsylvania at the most.
There were other factors, but if you look
at what the New York Times said and a
lot of what the more reputable analysts
are saying, the Stella support is what
swung Pennsylvania.
What’s the first issue Obama
ply Store and so on. In our case, it’s
the Greater Boston Bigfoot Research
Institute, a completely imaginary
think tank dedicated to researching the
bipedal cryptids; the profits of the store
go toward the writing and tutoring
center in the back room. “It also serves
as a big source of inspiration for the
students,” says Johnson.
In addition to Mejia’s piece, an il-
lustrated broadside of 9-year-old Sophia
Madden’s Ode to a Tree, a half-English,
half-Spanish poem penned during an
826 poetry workshop, will be auctioned.
Also up for auction is an excerpt from
Chiomo Nwaoha’s essay, A Bright and
Sunny Day, included in I Wish They
Would Have Asked Me, the 826 anthol-
ogy of writing done by students at the
English High School in Jamaica Plain.
“It’s a great change to walk into an
after-school space where the kids are
happy to be there,” said Robert daVies,
founder of Rope-a-Dope Press, a pub-
james jean
Ode to a Tree: a pen and ink drawing of
a tall tree. Most of the tree is dark gray,
the shadow contrasted in black ink. The
composition mimics the relationship
between the Spanish and English used
in Sophia’s poem.
In addition to the prints, 25 pieces by
contemporary artists (Kiki Smith, Jane
Marsching, Michael Mazur and more)
have been donated for the auction.
James Jean’s Maze creates a dreamy
pop-surrealist atmosphere, where a
boy chases a hula hoop in the distance
and his fairy-tale sister watches him,
leaning on a hula hoop constructed in
the pattern of a labyrinth. The dream-
like depiction of childhood combined
with the symbolism of the labyrinth
supporting the girl feed into the concept
of childhood as a dream, leaning on a
bigger dream—the future, where walls

and innovative. I’d rather be there than
everyone saying it was OK.
Can you enjoy your old work, or are
you always evaluating it?
46 I am particularly not like that. When we’re
finishing something and I’m seeing it for
the first time, then I’m watching all the
decisions, thinking, Oh, we could have
should tackle?
We want to see him promoting corn dogs
more. A lot of people don’t eat corn dogs;
a lot of people who eat corn dogs claim
not to like them. I think we need to work
on both the quality, and the distribu-
tion of corn dogs. They need to be more
readily available. I think they should be at
every Starbucks.
lishing collaborative based in Southie
that’s collaborating with 826 to produce
limited-edition broadsides.
The broadsides are illustrated in
response to the students’ writings.
“Photography, charcoal, lots of different
mediums will be used to respond,” says
Johnson. Rope-a-Dope’s daVies, also an
artist, illustrated a response to Madden’s
are perpetually hit and new routes taken,
dead ends being sometimes unavoidable.
Maze is extremely appropriate for
826, an organization that is trying to
minimize dead ends and empower the
next generation through communica-
tion and self-expression.

arts, performing arts, comedy + words
listings
WORDS
Brookline Booksmith
279 Harvard St., Brook-
line. 617.566.6660.
brooklinebooksmith.com
Thu 12.11 Stephen
Pimpare and Howard
Zinn, A People’s History of
Poverty in America [7pm]
Tue 12.16 M.T. Ander-
son, The Astonishing Life
of Octavian Nothing,
Traitor to the Nation,
Volume II: The Kingdom
on the Waves and Deb
Olin Unferth, Vacation
[7pm]
Cantab Lounge
(Downstairs)
738 Mass. Ave., Central
Sq., Cambridge.
617.354.2685.
cantab-lounge.com
Wed 12.10 Boston
Poetry Slam w/ Max
Kessler [8pm/18+/$3]
Wed 12.17 Boston Po-
etry Slam w/ Eric Darby
[8pm/18+/$3]
Coolidge Corner Theatre
290 Harvard St., Brook-
line. 617.734.2500.
brooklinebooksmith.com
Wed 12.10 Christopher
Kimball, Jack Bishop,
Becky Hays and Test
Kitchen Director Erin
McMurrer, America’s Test
Kitchen Family Baking
Book [6pm/$5]
Harvard Book Store
1256 Mass. Ave.,
Harvard Sq., Cambridge.
617.661.1515.
harvard.com
Wed 12.17 The
Philosophy Café, Soul
vs. Cybernetics: Who
are you, essentially?
[7:30pm]
Lizard Lounge
1667 Mass. Ave., Cam-
bridge. 617.547.0759.
lizardloungeclub.com
Sun 12.14 Lizard
Lounge Poetry Night
feat. The Jeff Robinson
Trio [8pm/21+/$5]
Porter Square Books
25 White St., Porter Sq.,
Cambridge. 617.491.2220.
portersquarebooks.com
Sun 12.14 Knit One,
Read Too [1pm]
big red & shiny picks
Atlantic Works Gallery
80 Border St., top floor,
East Boston. atlantic-
works.org
12
Thu 12.4-Sat 1.10
Hynes Convention
Center: South Rotunda
Gallery
900 Boylston St.,
Boston. 617.954.3787.
table of contents
COMEDY possibly strange, guests Fri 12.5-Sun 1.3 [Fri &
[7:30pm/21+/$20] Sat 8pm, Sun 12.21 &
Letters
Comedy Studio Sat 12.13 The Walsh Sun 12.28 4pm]
Harvard Square Brothers w/ special,
1238 Mass. Ave., Cam- possibly strange, guests Huntington Theatre/
us
bridge. 617.661.6507. [7:30pm/21+/$20] Boston Center for
thecomedystudio.com Wed 12.17 The the Arts
News + features
Wed 12.10 Fresh Faces Lincoln Exhibit w/Jon 527 Tremont St., Boston.
w/ Kevin Anglin, Shaun Lincoln, Chris Coxen 617.266.0800.
Bedgood, PJ Brown, Rob [7:30pm/21+/$10] huntingtontheatre.org
Creen, et al [8pm/$8] Lea DeLaria [$25]
Thu 12.11 The Thursday Improv Asylum Thu 12.11-Sat 12.13
Show! [8pm/$8] 216 Hanover St., Boston. [schedule varies]
Fri 12.12 Ken Reid 617.263.6887.
commerce
hosts w/ Alvin David, improvasylum.com American Repertory
Mike Lemme, Drew Thu 12.11 Free Pasta Theatre
Spangler, Steve Macone, Night [7pm/free], Main 64 Brattle St., Harvard Sq.,
et al [8pm/$10] Stage Show [8pm/$10- Cambridge. 617.547.8300.
Sat 12.13 Nate John- $20], Free Improv Set amrep.org
gift guide
son, Steve Macone, Brian [9:45pm/free] Largo Desolato [$5,
Moote, Tony Maschetto, Fri 12.12 Main Stage $10]
et al [8pm/$10] Show [8pm, 10pm/$10- Fri 12.5-Sat 12.13 [Thu-
Sun 12.14 The Shaun $20] Sun 7:30pm]
Bedgood Show [8pm/$8] Sat 12.13 Main Stage
Eats + drinks
Show [8pm, 10pm/$18- Central Square Theatre
Tue 12.16 Mystery
$20], Midnight Show 450 Mass. Ave., Central Sq.,
Lounge [8pm/$10]
[12am/$10] Cambridge. 617.576.9278.
Wed 12.17 Dan Crohn,
Wed 12.10 Vanity Proj- centralsquaretheatre.org
Mike Del Ilano, Andrew
ect [8pm/$7.50-$15] Alice’s Adventures Un-
Raymond Durson, Steve
derground [$18-$32]
dig this
Macone, et al [8pm/$8]
Wilbur Theatre Thu 12.4-Sun 12.28
Dick’s Beantown 106 Boylston St., [schedule varies]
Comedy Vault at Boston. 617.423.4008.
Lyric Stage Company
A + E
Remington’s Restaurant thewilburtheatre.com
Wed 12.10 NESN 140 Clarendon St.,
124 Boylston St.,
Comedy All Stars Boston. 617.585.5678.
Boston. 617.574.9697.
Music
[7:30pm/free] lyricstage.com
dickdoherty.com
Thu 12.11 Stella The Mystery of Irma
Thu 12.11 The
[7:30pm/$29.50] Vep [$25-$50]
Chris Zito Show
movies
Fri 11.28-Sun 12.21
[8:30pm/21+/$12]
THEATER [schedule varies]
Fri 12.12 Chris Zito,
Orlando Baxter and
arts
Citi Performing Arts New Repertory Theatre
friends [9pm/21+/$20]
Center Wang Theatre 321 Arsenal St., Water-
Sat 12.13 Chris town. 617.923.8487.
WORDS
Zito, Orlando Baxter 270 Tremont St.,
Boston. 617.482.9393. newrep.org
and friends [8pm,
citicenter.org Charles Dickens’ A
10:15pm/21+/$20]
Dr. Suess’ How The Christmas Carol [$35-
comedy
Sun 12.14 Carolyn $55]
Plummer hosts Boston’s Grinch Stole Christmas!
The Musical [$28-$78] Sun 12.14-Sun 12.28
Longest Open Mic [schedule varies]
[9pm/21+/$12] Wed 11.26-Sun 12.28
The Santaland Diaries
Comics
Mon 12.15 Kevin [Tue 7:30pm; Wed
11:30am & 7:30pm; Thu [$35-$55]
Knox Comedy Showcase Wed 12.17-Sun 1.4
[8:30pm/21+/$12] 7:30pm; Fri 5pm & 8pm;
Sat 11am, 2pm, 5pm & [schedule varies]
Classifieds
Tue 12.16 Jim Lau-
letta Comedy Showcase 8pm; Sun 11am, 2pm
Symphony Hall
[8:30pm/21+/$12] & 5pm]
301 Mass. Ave., Boston.
Boston Playwrights 617.266.1492. bso.org
Mottley’s Comedy Club Boston’s Holiday Pops!
Theatre
ADULT
61 Chatham St., Boston. [$27-$122]
617.427.0093. 949 Comm. Ave.,
Boston. 866.811.4111. Thu 12.11-Wed 12.31
mottleycomedy.com [Tue-Sat 8pm]
bu.edu/bpt
exit polls
Wed 12.10 The
Lincoln Exhibit w/ Jon Bella Muerte [$12-$15]
Zero Arrow Theatre
Lincoln, Chris Coxen, Fri 12.5-Sat 12.13 [8pm]
Mass. Ave. and Arrow St.,
Robbie Roadsteamer Harvard Sq., Cambridge.
[7:30pm/21+/$10] Gold Dust Orphans at
Theater Machine 617.547.8300. zeroar- 47
Thu 12.11 Su- rowtheatre.org
pershow w/ Dan 1256 Boylston St.,
Boston. 617.266.8511. Aurelia’s Oratorio
Sally, Andy Ofiesh [$25-$79]
[7:30pm/21+/$10] golddustorphans.com
All About Christmas Fri 11.28-Sun 1.3
Fri 12.12 The Walsh [schedule varies]
Brothers w/ special, Eve [$28, $30]
>> bigredandshiny.com
susanpost.com On the Street Linga
The Defining Line Tue 12.2-Sat 12.20 Sat 12.20 [2pm-3pm]
Mon 12.1-Fri 1.16
Reception: Thu 12.11 MIT List Visual Arts Tufts University Art
[5pm-7pm] Center Gallery
20 Aims St., Cambridge. 40R Talbot Ave., Med-
Kingston Gallery 617.253.4680. listart. ford. 617.627.3094. ase.
450 Harrison Ave. #43, mit.edu tufts.edu/gallery
Boston. 617.423.4113. Adel Abdessemed: MFA Thesis Exhibition
kingstongallery.com Situation and Practice Thu 12.4-Sun 12.21
Simmons College Cu- Sat 10.11-Sun 1.4
ratorial Studies Seminar: Gallery Talk with Mark
 marketplace classifieds | comics | savage love

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 comics
the thinking ape blues | mark poutenis | thinkingapeblues.com

LULU EIGHTBALL | EMILY FLAKE | EFLAKEAGOGO.COM

THINK | keith knight | kchronicles.com

TED RALL | TED RALL | tedrall.com

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 savage love
THE HELL YOU WANT
BY DAN SAVAGE | MAIL@SAVAGELOVE.NET
I am obsessed with my girlfriend sitting on
my face, so I can eat her out while my nose
penetrates her. It drives her crazy as well. I
am wondering if you have heard of a dildo
that could be mounted on my face, specifi-
cally on my nose, so that I penetrate her
more deeply while she sits on my face and I
lick her clit? Basically, I want her to be able
to really ride my face while I lick her clit.
-Strange Fantasy Dude
“Sadly, there’s no out-of-the-box solution
I can recommend,” says Cory Silverberg
of Come As You Are, Toronto’s worker-
owned-and-operated sex shop. “There are
harnesses that are meant to strap on to the
head, like the Head-On Harness available at
stockroom.com. But it covers the mouth.”
So you wouldn’t be able to eat your girl-
friend out with one buckled to your face.
Cory continues, “And there is the
often-poked-fun-at Accommodator.” (A
12
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WEEKLYDIG.C0M
52
latex harness that straps a dildo to your
chin and looks just as ridiculous as it
feels.) “But it isn’t hollow, so it couldn’t
be worn comfortably over the nose,” he
says. And finding something that fits
comfortably over your nose is going to be
your biggest problem.
“It would need to be hollow,” explains
Cory, “but it would need enough heft such
that it wouldn’t be constantly buckling
and hitting you in the mouth or between
the eyes. The tricky thing is that the nose
is so close to the eyes, so anything with
straps might dig in or at least go over the
eyes in an uncomfortable way.”
So what do you do?
“Get in touch with a good harness
maker and ask if they do custom work,”
Cory recommends. “One of my favorites
is Outlaw Leather in Seattle (outlawse-
attle.com).” Outlaw Leather produces
high-quality dildo harnesses and could,
in theory, make you a dildo
harness that fits comfortably
over your nose. Custom work
is expensive, of course. “But no
one said dreams came cheap,”
says Cory.
But if you’re going to go
the custom-made route, SFD,
I think you might have better
luck with a custom-made
hood. They’re designed to be
worn over the nose, and most
have mouth openings. You
could easily have one made
their existences to booze, emotional
with a wider mouth opening and an
vulnerability and a little well-timed,
extended nosepiece.
well-intentioned manipulation.
“You could also go the Cyrano de
And wherever did you get the idea that
Bergerac route,” says Cory, “and look into
sex-for-sex’s sake can’t also be affectionate?
getting a high-quality prosthesis that
fits over the nose.” He thinks the folks
I am a straight, 18-year-old girl and a
lurking at Pinocchia (forums.pinocchia.
college freshman. A couple of months
com)—a site for guys into girls with big
ago, I lost my virginity to my first serious
noses—might have some idea where to
boyfriend, and since then we’ve been
get a prosthesis.
having sex several times a day. Appar-
ently we have been a bit too enthusiastic,
I’m a 30-year-old, mildly genderqueer, bi-
because my boyfriend received a note
leaning-het male virgin. I’m not uncom-
from his downstairs neighbors. In crass
fortable around women—pretty much all
and abusive language, they told us to keep
of my friends are women—I don’t really
it down. I was mortified. Post-note, I’ve
have any confidence issues, and I know I’m
been tense and nervous during sex, more
not a prude. But for reasons too compli-
focused on listening for the neighbors
cated to get into here, I just haven’t gotten
than enjoying the act. This is upsetting me
around to screwing anybody yet. I’m wait-
terribly, and I don’t know how to make it
ing for the right person, and it just hasn’t
better. Even if we are both silent, the bed
happened yet. I don’t want to have sex
inevitably squeaks and thumps. There is
with somebody who’s drunk or emotion-
really nowhere else on campus for us to
ally vulnerable, or manipulate anybody,
go (I have three roommates who don’t
and it’s very important to me that sex be
get out much). What should I do? I am so
(among other things) a form of affection
depressed by this situation.
and not isolated sex-for-sex’s sake.
-Loud And Clear
I know I’m the only person who can
answer the question of whether I want to
Go buy the original Broadway cast record-
have sex right now. But do I need to have
ing of Avenue Q. The next time you have
sex right now? Because one day I’m going
sex, blast “You Can Be as Loud as the Hell
to fall in love, and it’s going to get sexual.
You Want (When You’re Makin’ Love)” at
The message I hear from a lot of people I
top volume. When the neighbors complain
respect is that I’m going to pay a price for
about the music, tell them that they can
waiting until then to get laid. Am I? Am I
listen to show tunes or put up with the
probably going to be OK?
noise you guys make when you have
-Virgin At Thirty
sex—their pick.
Yeah, you’ll be OK—but by ruling out
For the full text of this week's
drunks, the emotionally vulnerable and
column, go to weeklydig.com. DOWN-
the easily manipulated, VAT, you increase
LOAD DAN SAVAGE’S WEEKLY PODCAST,
the odds that you’ll remain a virgin for
SAVAGE LOVECAST, EVERY TUESDAY AT
the rest of your natural life. A lot of very
Joe Newton
THESTRANGER.COM/SAVAGE.
beautiful relationships—to say nothing
of a lot of very timely deflowerings—owe
 table of contents
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 exit polls EDITORIAL

managing editor Laura Dargus

music + arts editor David Day
News + features editor Cara Bayles
EMILY DANIELLE
copy chief Courtney Cox
AFTER THE 826 BENEFIT AT THE OUTSIDE THE HARP AFTER A BUFFALO contributors Jason & Todd Alström,
HARD ROCK CAFE, 12.2.08 BILLS LOSS, 12.7.08 Tyler Balliet, Joe Bernardi, Martín
Caballero, Jennifer Cacicio, Jonathan
Donaldson, Debbie Driscoll, Christian
Holland, Ada Hutchinson, Brent T. Ingram,
Why do The Men call themselves Do you dream of Jim Kelly when
Brian E. King, Garrett Martin, Paul
The Men? you go to sleep in your special McMorrow, Bo Moore, Luke O’Neil,
Because boys like to think they’re pajamas? Jenna Scherer, Rob Turbovsky,
Dave Wedge, David Wildman
grown up and call themselves men. I dream of the day the Bills make
interns Jared Annis, Jennifer Choi,
the playoffs again. But I’m at the Patrick Connolly, Alexandra Dednah,
What do you like most about point this year when I say the same Al Deluca, Christine Denning,
826 Boston? phrase: “There’s always next year.” Alexandra Fletcher, Meaghan Ford,
I love writing. I’m in a doctoral Jamie Granoff, Nakia Hill, Kristen
Humbert, Morgan Keenan, Carly
program and I’m a professor so I Oh, does that start now?
Lavoie, Tiffany Mah, Nisha Maxwell,
have to write. I write a lot concern- That’s our favorite phrase in Buffalo. Kate Richi, Lolly Spindler, Lauren
ing art theory and philosophy and There’s talk they’ll move to Toronto. Wiegan, Ben Whelan

Did you see all the memorabilia?
There’s that guitar that’s orange.
Oh, that’s the logo.
What did you like the most?
I really liked the Polaroid by the
bathroom of John and Yoko. It
aesthetics.
What was the most pleasing
thing about the show tonight?
The lights flashed with the beat.
Where’d you get this cool coat?
You’re a Bills fan, I can tell by
your pants.
They’re called Zubaz.
They look kind of like pajamas.
That’s why they’re so comfortable.
They’re my Sunday pants. I wear
When you were 19, you went to
Canada to drink.
Damn Canadians! Corrupting our
youth … So you came to the Harp
for the game?
This is the official Bills Backers bar.
DESIGN
creative director Tak Toyoshima
art director Taylor Seidler
Designer Scott Murry
interns Stephanie Crumley,
Lillian Ling, Anthony O'Brien

was attention-grabbing, but in a
mild way.
How’d you like to be in a band
whose memorabilia is in the
bathroom?
Well, everyone has to go to the
I got it on the Cape. It was mis-
marked. It had handwritten tags
and they wrote $24 instead of $42.
It was in Chatham.
Fucking Chatham!
And the scarf is Tibetan. And the bag
them every Sunday, football season
or not. I also wore them to class
every single day in college. I went to
school in Buffalo.
Why did you move to Boston?
There’s not many jobs in Buffalo. I
These are all Bills fans.
That makes a lot of sense to these
other normal people. They seem
really confused.
They have free wings at halftime.
BUSINESS + ADVERTISING
sales manager Alex Lappin
Senior Account Executive
Graham Wilson
account executives Antonio
Aniello, Marc Ellison, J.R. Roach

bathroom, so if your memorabilia
is actually in the bathroom you are
all set. If you were behind the door
in the women’s stall, you’d be in
great shape.
WATCH OUT! exit pollster david day is at large | weeklydig.com
is from Florence. have friends out here and there’s
some good rugby teams here. I play
for Boston Women’s Rugby.
Oh shit!
Yeah, back off! Just kidding.
I had some wings. Buffalo gave
us Buffalo wings, and for that I
thank you.
You’re welcome.
From the bottom of my stomach.
ADMINISTRATION
publisher/editor Jeff Lawrence
vice president Jim Stanton
Vice president/new biz dev
Alfred Wilson
general manager Amanda Nicholson
advisor Joseph B. Darby III
DISTRIBUTION Fairbairn Dist. Co.

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