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TEEN PARENTING ISN'T EASY. THEY MUST LIVE TWO LIVES IN ONE, AS A TEEN AND AS A PARENT. RAISING A CHILD ISN'T AN EASY THING TO DO. RAISING A CHILD WHILE THE PARENTS ARE STILL IN THEIR TEENS IS EVEN HARDER. DEALING WITH THE DAY TO DAY CHORES THAT INVOLVES A BABY
http://www.essortment.com/teen-parenting-50093.html
Role strain Financial difficulty Criticism & Discrimination Lose the chance of being a teen Rare that teen parents will stay together Time management Lack of parenting skills
Single Parenting
Being isolated (constant moving) Low self-esteem Behavioral and emotional distress Sinking grades (trauma)
Adoption
IF WE AREN'T STRAIGHT WITH OUR CHILDREN ABOUT THEIR PAST, THEY WILL PICK UP ON IT AND FANTASIZE SOMETHING THAT MAY BE MUCH WORSE.
-CAROL WILLIAMS, UNIVERSITY OF NORTH CAROLINA.
http://www.adoptivefamilies.com/articles.php?aid=881
Rejection and Loss Guilt and Shame Need for Intimacy Feel a lack of Control
http://www.ehow.com/info_7871622_effects-adoption-kids.html
"YOUR BIRTH MOTHER COULDN'T TAKE CARE OF YOU, BUT SHE WANTED YOU TO BE SAFE. SO SHE FOUND A SAFE PLACE TO PUT YOU WHERE OTHER ADULTS WOULD TAKE CARE OF YOU.|
Elementary years:
"WE FEEL SAD SOMETIMES, AND EVEN MAD SOMETIMES, THAT WE CANNOT GIVE YOU ANY MORE INFORMATION. DO YOU EVER HAVE ANY SAD OR MAD FEELINGS ABOUT NOT KNOWING Source: National Survey of Parents with Disabilities; State of New Jersey; Parent Link ANYTHING? IT IS IMPORTANT TO UNDERSTAND (http://www.nj.gov/njparentlink/services/special/) THAT YOU ARE NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THE
"ALTHOUGH WE DO NOT HAVE SPECIFIC INFORMATION ABOUT YOUR BIRTH PARENTS, WE CAN STUDY YOUR COUNTRY AND TRY TO UNDERSTAND WHY BIRTH PARENTS HAD TO MAKE SUCH DIFFICULT DECISIONS. WHEN YOU THINK ABOUT YOUR BIRTH PARENTS, WHAT DO YOU THINK ABOUT? ARE YOU EVER SAD OR ANGRY THAT YOU DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THEM?" PARENTS CAN BEGIN TO BRING UP THE SOCIETAL, ECONOMIC, AND CULTURAL ASPECTS OF THEIR CHILD'S COUNTRY THAT WOULD FORCE BIRTH PARENTS TO MAKE SUCH A DECISION.
Preteen:
SILENCE OF LOVE
HAVING A DISABILITY DOES NOT KEEP A PERSON FROM BEING A CAPABLE, LOVING PARENT. PARENTS WITH DISABILITIES FACE THE SAME CHALLENGES OF RAISING CHILDREN AS ALL PARENTS. YET, PARENTS WITH DISABILITIES ALSO CAN HAVE UNIQUE NEEDS AND CONCERNS.
Source: National Survey of Parents with Disabilities State of New Jersey; Parent Link (http://www.nj.gov/njparentlink/services/special/)
MENTAL ILLNESS CAN BE FRIGHTENING -- NOT ONLY TO THE PERSON WHO HAS IT BUT ALSO TO PEOPLE AROUND THEM. IF YOU ARE A CHILD AND RELIANT ON THE CARE OF AN ADULT WHO HAS A MENTAL ILLNESS, THINGS CAN BE EVEN MORE CONFUSING. CHILDREN MAY HAVE A NUMBER OF QUESTIONS, SUCH AS "WHY IS MY MOM OR DAD THIS WAY?"
5-YEAR OLD: "DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN YOU HAD CHICKEN POX? YOU CRIED A LOT, YOU DIDN'T FEEL LIKE DOING ANYTHING AND YOU WERE GROUCHY TOWARD ALL OF US. IT WASN'T BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T LOVE US OR WANTED TO BE THAT WAY BUT BECAUSE YOU DIDN'T FEEL WELL. RIGHT NOW YOUR MOMMYSource: Mental HealthFEEL WELL. PA DOESN'T Association of Southeastern THAT'S WHY SHE'S CRYING A LOT, NOT
10-YEAR OLD: "YOU KNOW HOW PARTS OF OUR BODIES GET SICK SOMETIMES, LIKE WHEN WE GET STOMACH ACHES OR SORE THROATS. WELL SOME PEOPLE GET SICK IN THE PART OF THEIR BRAIN THAT CONTROLS FEELINGS. THAT'S WHAT'S WRONG WITH DAD. HE HAS A SICKNESS IN THAT PART Source: Mental Health Association of Southeastern PA OF HIS BRAIN THAT CONTROLS FEELINGS. THIS
WHAT TO SAY? ""MY DAD DOES THAT BECAUSE HE IS SICK. I WOULDN'T MAKE FUN OF YOUR DAD IF HE WAS SICK PLEASEREALLY UNDERSTOOD WHAT IS "IF YOU DON'T MAKE FUN OF MINE." WRONG WITH MY MOTHER, I DON'T THINK YOU'D SAY THAT. SHE HAS AN ILLNESS THAT MAKES HER DO THAT. SHE'S TAKING MEDICINE AND TRYING TO GET Source: Mental Health FOR of Southeastern BETTER. IT'S REALLY HARDAssociationME, SO PA PLEASE DON'T TEASE ME
ASK A CHILD ABOUT THE WAY THEIR PARENT ACTS AND HOW IT MAKES THEM FEEL. EXPLAIN THAT MENTAL ILLNESS CAN MAKE PARENTS ACT IN STRANGE, CONFUSING OR SCARY WAYS SOMETIMES.
Source: Mental Health Association of Southeastern PA
WHAT TO SAY? "YOU KNOW I SOMETIMES WISH THERE WAS SOMETHING I COULD DO/OR WISH I HAD DONE DIFFERENTLY TO MAKE YOUR MOM/DAD BETTER. BUT I KNOW THAT MENTAL ILLNESS IS NOBODY'S FAULT . . . "
Source: Mental Health Association of Southeastern PA
LGBT Parents
CURRENT RESEARCH SHOWS THAT CHILDREN WITH GAY AND LESBIAN PARENTS DO NOT DIFFER FROM CHILDREN WITH HETEROSEXUAL PARENTS IN THEIR EMOTIONAL DEVELOPMENT OR IN THEIR RELATIONSHIPS WITH PEERS AND ADULTS. IT IS IMPORTANT FOR PARENTS TO UNDERSTAND THAT IT IS THE QUALITY OF THE PARENT/CHILD
SOME LGBT FAMILIES FACE DISCRIMINATION IN THEIR COMMUNITIES AND CHILDREN MAY BE TEASED OR BULLIED BY PEERS. .
PARENTS CAN HELP THEIR CHILDREN COPE WITH THESE PRESSURES IN THE FF. WAYS:
Allow for open communication and discussions that are appropriate to your childs age and level of maturity. Prepare your child to handle questions and comments about their background or family. Help your child come up with and practice appropriate responses to teasing or mean remarks. Use books, Web sites and movies that show children in LGBT families. Consider having a support network for your child Consider living in a community where diversity is more accepted.
Military Deployment
CHILDREN GOING THROUGH DEPLOYMENT MAY EXPERIENCE MANY OF THE SAME EFFECTS AS CHILDREN OF DIVORCE.
SEPARATION ANXIETY
Preschool or Kindergarten Age Children Clinging to people or favorite toy or blanket. Unexplained crying or tearfulness. Choosing adults over same-age play mates. Increased acts of violence toward people or things. Shrinking away from people or becoming very quiet. Sleep difficulties or disturbances (waking, bad dreams) Eating difficulties or change in eating patterns. Fear of new people or situations. Keeps primary care giver in view.
SEPARATION ANXIETY
School-Age Children Any of the signs listed above, and: A rise in complaints about stomachaches, headaches, or other illnesses. More irritable and crabby. Problems at school (drop in grades, does not want to go, or general complaining) Anger toward at-home parent.
SEPARATION ANXIETY
Adolescents Any of the signs listed above, and: Acting out behaviors (trouble at school, home, law) Low self-esteem and self-criticism. Misdirected anger (lots of anger over small things; directed at siblings/parent) Sudden or unusual school problems. Loss of interest in usual interests and hobbies.
POSITIVE ASPECTS
Fosters maturity Encourages independence Strengthens family bonds
Family Violence
FAMILY OR DOMESTIC VIOLENCE REFERS TO AN INDIVIDUAL'S USE OF ANY FORM OF PHYSICAL, EMOTIONAL OR PSYCHOLOGICAL MEANS TO CONTROL HIS PARTNER OR OTHER FAMILY MEMBERS. ONE-FOURTH TO ONE-HALF OF THE ABUSING MEN BECOME VIOLENT IN ASSOCIATION WITH DRUG OR ALCOHOL ABUSE. ABOUT THREE MILLION CHILDREN
1.LOW SELF-ESTEEM 2.INCREASED LEVELS OF ANXIETY 3.REPRESSED FEELINGS OF FEAR, ANGER, GUILT AND CONFUSION 4.REGRESSION 5.CLINGINESS 6.AGGRESSION/TEMPER TANTRUMS
Play is the language of very young children. It helps children to manage their feelings and to cope with upsetting things that happen in their lives. It is one of the ways children learn about and practice living in their world and their culture. It helps build relationships. And play is relaxation and fun!
Infants (0-2)
Play Type: SOLITARY PLAY He plays alone. There is limited interaction with other children. Role of Play: Infants need to make sense of their world. They need things to see and hear (changes of scenery, parents' voices, music, mobiles). They start to learn cause and effect They start to learn turn-taking
Toddler (2-21/2)
Play Type: SPECTATOR/ONLOOKER PLAY Observe other children playing around him but will NOT play with them. Role of Play: It teaches the toddler how to act when he's ready to join in the fun. Watching the big kids play is a great way for him to learn the politics of the playground.
Toddler (2-21/2)
Play Type: PARALLEL PLAY Play alongside others but will not play together with them. Role of Play: The kid is learning loads about socializing and playing just by building blocks next to another kid. This sort of play will teach him basic concepts and rules of play.
Preschooler (3-4)
Play Type: ASSOCIATIVE PLAY Starts to interact with others in their play. Develops friendships and the preferences for playing with some but not all other children; in mixed sex groups. Role of Play: The kid may be playing in a group, but still doing his own thing. It teaches kids how to cooperate and possibly start making real friends. It also helps with language development and problem. This is the first category that involves strong social interaction between the children while they play.